Chapter 24

The singing waiter

Panda, Baduk, and Eoluk—my impression upon seeing these guys.

‘It’s not like an animal farm or something...’

Their faces had large spots as if they had been beaten up by someone, or strange marks on their noses, foreheads, and cheeks.

Moreover, why did they all look so aggrieved?

They looked as if they had taken on all the world’s grievances alone.

‘Does this guy have skin cancer or something?’

I couldn’t help but be startled when I saw the large black spot on one of their cheeks.

I turned my head with a creak and asked Mr. Chun, the head of the dining hall.

“Sir, this might just be my impression, but it seems like you’ve only chosen people with large spots...”

Sujung of the dining hall was about to say something, but Mr. Byeon, the head of the main hall, answered first with a slightly moved expression.

“Indeed, you understand my efforts, Sir!”

‘Efforts? This guy! Why did you bring people who need to go to the dermatologist?’

Feeling annoyed, I made a frustrated expression, and the clueless Mr. Byeon said, somewhat embarrassed,

“Of course, Sir. How could I introduce just anyone to you? Naturally, I chose people with auspicious spots that customers would like. It’s a basic quality of a waiter.”

In my past life, people with large spots were often said to have auspicious spots, but it seemed to be a part of Chinese culture.

I thought the customers had some strange preferences, but after confirming my face, Mr. Chun, the head of the dining hall, explained the relationship between auspicious spots and waiters in detail.

“The customers who visit a restaurant with waiters who have auspicious spots are said to receive the same good fortune.”

‘Is this a curse, wishing them to get skin cancer?’

It seemed the meaning of ‘good fortune’ here was a bit different.

The situation could only be interpreted as wishing them to receive the aura of skin cancer.

Shaking my head, I headed to the kitchen.

“I’ll bring some tea first.”

Anyway, since he had taken time out of his schedule to help me at the request of my brother, I had to treat him as a guest.

Even though he brought people with skin cancer.

I prepared a kettle of boiling water and cups to serve them tea.

When I brought out a full kettle of tea, the atmosphere of the inn seemed to have changed.

Looking around to see what had changed, I noticed that three chairs were placed behind a table, with Mr. Chun and Mr. Byeon sitting on either side, leaving the middle seat empty.

On the other side of the table, the waiters were lined up, clearing their throats.

It looked like some kind of audition.

After serving tea to both of them and sitting down as they guided me, Mr. Chun, the head of the dining hall, spoke to the waiter standing on the far left.

“Show us your skills once.”

The waiter with a large spot on his nose, known as Nose Boss, stepped forward and introduced himself.

“I have three years of experience working at a Joulou.”

A Joulou is a high-end tavern, so the first waiter had three years of experience as a tavern waiter.

Although a tavern waiter and an inn waiter were a bit different, they were in similar service industries, so it might not be bad.

While I was thinking this, Mr. Chun quickly spoke from the side.

“Alright, prepare nine-layered pork with leeks and two plates of dumplings, roasted chicken, crab washed with water, two bowls of wonton noodles, and Huazhou wine. And if a peddler selling deer meat comes, please guide them in.”

Mr. Chun relayed the order so quickly that I couldn’t remember much of it, and looking at him in confusion, he whispered in my ear,

“We’re checking how well the waiters remember the orders and how well they convey them to the kitchen.”

‘Oh... So there’s such a trivial yet profound meaning?’

Looking at him with an expression that seemed to ask if such a trivial act had such a deep meaning, he smiled and pointed to the waiter.

Anyway, curious about how much the waiter remembered, I followed Mr. Chun’s gesture and looked at the first waiter, who slowly began to recite the order.

However, what came out of the waiter’s mouth was not a normal order but a song-like rap.

Suddenly, the waiter started singing loudly.

“Nine-layered pork with leeks, the best in the world~ and two plates of dumplings~ Ah~ crab washed with water, can’t miss it! Two bowls of wonton noodles and a pleasant drink, Huazhou wine~ With delicious food and drinks, ah, what a joyful day~”

When the waiter’s song ended, Mr. Chun and Mr. Byeon looked at each other and nodded.

Mr. Chun, exchanging glances, spoke first in a stern voice.

“The roasted chicken order was missing, and you need to practice your lyrics more. They’re too monotonous.”

Then Mr. Byeon also shared his thoughts.

“Your order might be a bit difficult to present when high-ranking people visit. It’s easy to understand, but it’s not suitable for working in Sir’s inn.”

It really felt like an audition. After they criticized him, they suddenly looked at me.

‘Am I supposed to do it too?’

Nodding their heads in response to my questioning gaze, I decided to just say one thing, feeling ridiculous.

“Fail (不通)!”

‘Fail, this guy! His face is a fail! Looking at him makes me feel bad.’

The failed waiter left the inn with a dejected expression.

It was pitiful, but that’s how auditions go.

The failed one has to take care of their own mental state.

After dejectedly dismissing one waiter, I stopped Mr. Chun from making the second one sing and asked what this was all about.

“Why are you checking their singing skills?”

Mr. Chun, surprised by my question, answered with a look that clearly said, “What do you know?”

‘I’m embarrassed too, you know?’

Trying to avoid his gaze, he started explaining again.

“Sir, have you never been to a high-end tavern or restaurant?”

“I like cooking and eating what I make, but I don’t really like going to restaurants or taverns...”

It was because I came from a humble family and had never been to such places, but I had to save face.

‘What!’

I was startled by the thought that I couldn’t say I hadn’t been to such places for the sake of face.

‘Is this? A localization patch?’

It seemed the localization patch was already in progress without my knowledge.

Shocked by the localization patch happening without my knowledge, I was in a daze when Mr. Chun suddenly praised me.

“As they say, ‘A gentleman changes the kitchen (君子改庖廚)’! We have met such a person here!”

The phrase “A gentleman changes the kitchen” comes from the Mencius (孟子) and means that a gentleman should stay away from the kitchen. It’s a slight modification of the idea that if you see an animal alive, you can’t see it die, and if you see it die, you can’t eat it.

It means that if you can’t prevent yourself or others from eating animals, you should at least ensure they are killed humanely.

However, Mr. Chun, who didn’t understand the content well, seemed to interpret it as a gentleman who cooks and changes the kitchen.

“Yes, let’s go with that. Haha... Ha... Ha...”

Laughing awkwardly, Mr. Chun began to explain the meaning of this ridiculous act.

“When conveying orders to the kitchen, singing slowly helps to slowly convey the order to the cook and allows the listening customer to check if anything is wrong. And when a high-end dish is ordered, singing the order loudly informs all the customers, enhancing the customer’s face.”

It seemed to be part of the culture of saving face.

‘Ha... What a ridiculous...’

Although my face allergy was flaring up again, I gritted my teeth and continued the audition.

The next one had a spot on one eye that looked like a panda mark.

“I came out to make a living while studying for the civil service exam.”

Introducing himself as a civil service exam candidate, he began his song as if reciting a poem.

“Thinking of delicious food in the clear wind and bright moon, I came to the inn, and the green-scented nine-layered pork with leeks came to mind... drinking with friends...”

As the civil service exam candidate’s song ended, criticism poured in.

“Your expression is beautiful, but this isn’t a place to recite poetry.”

“No matter how beautiful the lyrics, if people can’t understand them, they’re useless.”

“Fail (不通)!”

The civil service exam candidate sent a disdainful look at us for not understanding his song and disappeared.

The auditions continued.

“Unique style of singing, but only in your home.”

“Cough! I’m embarrassed to have brought you here.”

“Fail (不通)!”

Finally, the sixth and last one, Baduk with spots all over, sniffled and ran out of the inn.

Seeing Baduk run out, Mr. Chun and Mr. Byeon finally realized their mistake and looked startled.

They were so engrossed in the audition that they had ended up dismissing everyone.

For an inn waiter, just a suitable person would do.

They seemed to have gotten carried away.

Looking at each other, they had no idea how to fix this.

Suddenly, a woman rushed into the inn and knelt before us.

“Sir Chun, please give me a chance. I can really do it well.”

But Mr. Byeon immediately scolded the woman.

“Hey, you, chasing after us! Do you know who this Sir is? No auspicious spots, and a thin woman’s voice in Sir’s inn? No, absolutely not! And her large chest making her look slow! Isn’t that right?”

Mr. Chun also firmly rejected the woman’s request.

“Of course, no matter how pitiful your situation, how can we introduce you to the inn of the magistrate’s brother? That’s absurd!”

The kneeling woman, realizing that begging them wouldn’t work, looked up and pleaded with me.

“Sir, my parents ran a restaurant for a long time, and I helped them for a long time. I can do the job well. Please give me a chance. My parents have passed away, and I have to take care of my two younger siblings. I really need this job.”

With a tearful face, the woman looked up and pleaded with a sorrowful voice, and I couldn’t help but shout.

“Pass (通)”

Surprised by my decision, Mr. Chun, Mr. Byeon, and the woman looked at me.

“Sir, this woman has no auspicious spots, and her large chest makes her look slow. What about her do you like?”

Mr. Byeon asked, clearly confused, and Mr. Chun elbowed him.

But the clueless Mr. Byeon still looked at me for an answer.

‘Does this guy really have no eyes?’

“Cough...”

I cleared my throat and shouted at them.

“What do you mean, no auspicious spots! Look at how big it is!”

“Huh? Where, where?”

“Where is the spot?”

Pointing out the large spot, they looked confused, saying they didn’t see any spots.

“Cough! In the place I lived, a spot near a woman’s eye was considered the best auspicious spot! It meant good luck and wealth.”

‘In my past life, fortune-tellers always said that, right?’

Looking at the woman, a melon seed-sized tear spot was shining on her left eye.

“Is that it?”

I nodded at Mr. Byeon’s question.

‘Of course.’