Chapter 58

I knew I didn’t need to sleep when I realized I could use recovery magic to alleviate fatigue from lack of sleep.

The basic method to restore magic power is sleep, which is also essential for physical growth. However, the thought sometimes crosses my mind that if I don’t need to sleep, there are things to consider.

Sleeping can also be seen as wasting limited life. If I don’t sleep, things will keep moving inside me, and the amount of what I want to do will increase.

Even so, I still sleep to fit in with others, wake up in the morning, and do the daily routine of preparing the tavern for opening, buying ingredients, and giving instructions to the guild members.

I search for requests that only my guild can take and only accept those. There was a time when my goal was to satisfy my curiosity, obtain hard-to-get rewards, and increase what I can do.

However, when I actually started the guild, I began to prioritize considering the abilities of the guild members and making the most of their strengths. When doing dangerous jobs, I take sufficient precautions and support them to achieve their goals, always striving to grow the entire guild.

For five years, the most important thing I have always considered is not letting any guild member die during a request.

This is not something I need to reconsider; it is a given as a guild master. I thought I should be the one most concerned about the safety of the guild members.

However, this way of thinking, this belief that life should not be lost, did not resonate with my master.

People die easily, and it is not a sad thing.

There is no need to fear death, which comes naturally. Therefore, there is no need to hesitate to kill oneself.

When I thought of my master saying this, I found her terrifying—yet at the same time, I felt a longing for her as a transcendent being.

I was supposed to never be able to match her. However, one day after starting to learn from her, I realized something.

If I continue to learn, I can surpass her. I can gain the power to do as she wishes.

◆◇◆

I had no intention of sleeping and planned to stay awake to watch my master.

Still, the fact that I am dreaming means I cannot completely control myself.

Or perhaps, I felt at ease because Verlene and everyone else came.

After Verlene and the others said they would help with the tavern and left the room, I soon fell asleep.

I was remembering the time when I first met my master—when I was ten years old.

As a child, I couldn’t control the growing magic power and would unintentionally cast spells, which made the other children my age fear and avoid me.

Our family had been farmers for generations, but my father retired early and handed the house to my eldest brother, returning to his dream of being an adventurer and leaving home. My mother also left with him, but the children, including me, had already developed the ability to live independently, so we accepted their wishes.

I followed the will of my three older brothers and two older sisters. I had been helping with the housework since I was five, but after my parents left, my eldest brother said it was okay for me to do childlike things.

However, I had no friends to play with. My older siblings doted on me as the youngest brother, but they had their own friends and couldn’t always be with me.

So, I started going into the mountains. In the mountains, if my magic went out of control, it wouldn’t bother anyone, and I had always liked exploring. I reduced my housework and spent more time in the mountains, and eventually, I learned how to camp and sometimes didn’t return home for days. My sisters would catch me when I came back covered in mud, put me in the bath, and my brothers would laugh, saying, "You're going to be a big catch."

In my narrow world, I thought my older siblings were much more accomplished and impossible to catch up to. Being an adult was a dream for me, and I wanted to become one quickly.

I also thought that to meet my parents, who had set out on adventures, I needed to become an adult and choose the same path. They would sometimes return, but their stays were short, and we had no reason to keep them.

I don’t think this family structure is bad, and I have no intention of criticizing my parents. After leaving my eldest brother, my other brothers also began to travel and no longer returned home. I think that’s just the way our family is.

The more time I spent away from home and in the mountains, the more I forgot how to talk to people, and instead, I could read the emotions of animals through the flow of magic.

However, even the animals feared me. The beasts in the mountains did not accept me as a human and would not come near, and sometimes they would attack.

Still, as I continued to live in the mountains, my senses became increasingly sharp, and I felt I was no longer just a human. The days of surviving in the rugged mountains strengthened my abilities without my realizing it.

—And then, on that day, I met a wounded two-legged dragon in a cave deep in the mountains during a heavy rain.

The dragon, a target for adventurers, had fled for its life and attacked me out of fear of death and anger towards humans as I approached.

I thought that a creature as strong as a dragon might understand my feelings.

Now I realize that at the time, I was almost losing my sanity.

I didn’t want to cause trouble for my family with my magic out of control. As I stayed away from home, I feared that my family might eventually forget me.

The dragon did not accept me, clawed at me, and breathed fire. I did not give up and tried to apply medicine made from crushed herbs I had gathered in the mountains to the dragon.

When the dragon passed out from pain, I applied the medicine. At that moment, my consciousness faded.

I didn’t care what happened to me.

If the dragon died, I would have regretted it. And in the end, I thought of my family and realized faintly:

Dying here has no meaning. I felt deeply lonely and empty.

I had things I wanted to do. I wanted to go on adventures like my parents and see the unknown world—and.

I wanted to live among people like a normal person.

I remembered the days I played with the village children when I was still just a child, in fragmented memories.

In conclusion, it was my master who saved me. She saw the wounded dragon flying away and decided to follow it, moving through the rain-soaked forest by teleportation.

Then, she was suddenly standing in front of me. She looked at me, who was in tatters from burns and claw wounds, and placed her hand on me—using 'Healing Light.'

When I woke up, I was by the fire, with my master cradling my head on her lap.

In the flickering light, my master, with her translucent silver hair, looked so beautiful that I couldn’t believe she was of this world.

She stroked my head, touched my cheek, and spoke to me with a smile.

From the moment I heard her voice, I was captivated by her. Literally, my heart was stolen.

"Your name is Dick Silver, right?"

"…Why… why do you know…"

The voice I hadn’t used in a long time was hoarse and felt unfamiliar. My master covered her mouth and laughed, urging me to close my eyes.

"You should sleep a little more. It's okay, this one is grateful to you. It was just in pain and suffering, so it was thrashing around."

She could understand the dragon’s feelings.

She was like me. I felt as if I had finally found a companion, and my chest burned with a fierce heat.

My newly met master was endlessly kind.

Later, I learned that she was not particularly interested in life and death, but until then, I had a near-fanatical devotion to her.

The soft feeling of her knee. Although she didn’t seem much older, the sense of security I felt when leaning on her was so strong that I knew I could never leave.

I thought I could do anything for her.

What could I do to express my gratitude?

How could I make her happy? I asked, and she answered with her usual smile.

◆◇◆

Warm, amber light was touching my cheek, not the light of a campfire.

It was supposed to be noon, but when I woke up, it was already dusk.

I realized someone was touching my hair. I had been dozing off on my master’s bed.

The fingers that were touching me moved. I thought that was why I had a dream about the past.

That’s how I met her. I called her master and followed her.

She said I was hers. For five years, that was undeniably true.

She, who did not wish to live in this world, gave me back the connections I had lost.

But, with my last hope, I say what I was afraid to say five years ago because I feared disappointing her.

"I want you to live, Master."

My throat hurt, and my voice was hoarse. It was the same as when I first met her.

My master’s fingers, which were touching my hair, stopped. I still couldn’t raise my head.

"Please don’t ask me to kill you. For me, it’s the same as killing myself."

There was no answer. I knew changing her mind wouldn’t be easy.

My master remained silent. The fingers that had stopped moved slightly.

—Then, her hand gently ruffled my hair. I finally raised my head and looked at her.

She was smiling quietly. Her large eyes reflected me, and the light that fell on her affirmed me.

"…You have people who are as important to you as your life. I realized that when you returned to the capital."

"I…"

"You were meant to live among people. I just paved the way for you. I helped you on a whim, and there was no need for you to feel so grateful… but somehow, I became dependent on you."

Her eyes no longer held the madness she had when she asked me to kill her.

It felt like I had woken up from a long nightmare. My words reached her and were accepted. This was something I wished for but could never achieve while with her.

"For the first time, I was afraid of losing something. I thought I wouldn’t be lonely if I were killed by you. I thought I had forgotten the feeling of loneliness a long time ago… but it’s strange. When did I remember it?"

"…Master, you’ve been lonely all along. You just didn’t realize it."

I shouldn’t have said such a presumptuous thing, but I found myself saying it aloud.

I thought I might be slapped. What could I know, having lived for only twenty years?

But it didn’t happen as I imagined.

My master turned her face away on the bed and looked out the window. The breeze from the window blew her long hair, trying to hide the tears on her cheeks.

"…Dick Silver, you’re still the mischievous 'Dee' I remember."

"…Sorry. I thought I had grown up, but maybe not."

My master didn’t look at me. It seemed like she was being stubborn, but it was different.

Because she was smiling. Not a clown’s smile, but a natural, genuine smile that made me happy too.

"…Master, I have a lot of apologies to make, and I don’t know if I’ll be forgiven. If you still consider me your disciple, I’ll take responsibility with you. Let’s settle this once and for all."

"Are you trying to sell me a favor, Dee, by saying you don’t want to die?"

"That’s… yeah. I don’t think you’ll listen just because of this…"

I didn’t think so. Before I could say more, my master wiped her tears and looked at me.

"I’ve lost to you, Dee, so I don’t really have the right to speak, but can I ask you one thing?"

"…As long as it’s not to kill me, I’ll accept anything."

"When you become an old man and are about to die, take me with you. Until then, I’ll try not to get in your way."

This was the maximum concession she could make—yet I still found myself speaking softly.

"…If that’s the case, I’ll look for a way for you to die of old age."

"Is that even possible? I haven’t found it in all my searches."

"Then… I’ll become immortal too. That might make everyone angry."

"Maybe everyone would want to stay this way forever if they were with you."

If I said that, would Miralca and the others laugh? Or would they become interested in immortality?

If it’s a choice, I want to have it. But I don’t necessarily need to have it.

Now that I’ve decided not to leave my master alone, there must be ways to achieve this, if she doesn’t want to die.

Considering her sins, peaceful days won’t start immediately—but it will still be better than before.

"…I have a question for you, Master. I’ve been wondering about it since we met."

"My name? I’ve forgotten it. I think I had one a long time ago, but no one called me by it anymore."

"Is that so…"

I thought I could ask now, but there was nothing I could do about her answer.

"I was also called 'Forget Something' or something like that, so maybe I inherited it from you."

"Did you just realize that? You’re a lot like me, even being a guild master. I thought your information network was a bit lax, but overall, you’ve done well."

It felt like I was being praised for the first time in a long while. I can’t remember the last time it happened.

"…Like Beatrix, I’ll become your familiar from now on. I’ll be the second to take your family name."

"Is… is that okay? In your case, it’s different from Beatrix’s…"

"The family name is fine, but for the name, I’ll let you decide. I don’t mind being called Master, but since you’re stronger, you’ve graduated from being my disciple. I need to recognize you as an equal."

"…That’s an honor. Then, as a human, there’s