Chapter 2

Chapter 1 of Volume 2: Cry (2)

I, who had been crushed to death by a truck, found myself back to when I was about one year old...

What kind of bizarre twist of fate is this?

I was bewildered and confused, not knowing what to do. However, it didn't take long for me to accept the reality I was in.

Why?

Because there was no other way to deal with the situation except to accept it.

My parents, with their smooth, wrinkle-free faces.

A modest but cozy newlywed home.

Me, lying in a crib, wearing a diaper.

Even if I doubted and questioned my surroundings and senses like the philosopher Descartes, the conclusion was only one.

I had returned to when I was about one year old.

And I had brought with me all the self-awareness from the past forty years.

Could the god of medicine have given me another chance to correct my foolish and misguided life?

Hot tears suddenly welled up and flowed down my cheeks.

I couldn't tell if they were tears of repentance, remorse, or gratitude.

Perhaps they were all of the above.

‘This time, it will be different. It will definitely be different from before...’

I made a promise to myself.

My life from now on would be a complete 180-degree turn from my past life.

I would engrave this gratitude and appreciation in my heart, bones, and heart for the rest of my life.

My life, reborn, must not follow the same path as my previous life.

“Does our Faith want to eat? Oh, where does it hurt? You’re crying.”

Mother was startled when she saw me lying in the crib.

She wiped away my tears with her finger and then held me tightly in her arms.

Mother’s embrace, which I hadn’t felt in almost forty years, was warm and comforting.

It was so comforting that the sorrows of the past forty years seemed to melt away.

“Let’s see. The diaper is fine. No fever. Our Faith must be hungry, I guess.”

Mother lifted her blouse and fed me.

Although I didn’t particularly feel like eating anything, I instinctively suckled at her breast.

A typical baby would gnaw at the nipple with their gums and fuss for more milk, but I didn’t do that.

This time, I didn’t want to hurt Mother.

This time, Mother should live a life filled with happiness.

How much she had suffered during my high school years because of my wandering...

Mother’s milk was sweet.

It wasn’t for nothing that the phrase “a land flowing with milk and honey” was coined.

I looked up at Mother as I drank until my stomach was full.

The Mother I saw before I died and the Mother in her newlywed days seemed like two different people.

Mother was a flower in those days.

‘This time, it will be different. Mother. My life, and Mother’s life.’

I resolved in my heart.

Although my resolve wouldn’t immediately reach Mother, it would eventually.

“Faith, did you eat?”

Father, who had gone out for a while, came back into the room.

Father.

I called out his name in my heart, a name I missed even after a hundred calls.

Father, who passed away from angina when I finished my second year of pre-med.

Father, who led me to the path of thoracic surgery.

Father should live a long and happy life with me and Mother this time.

This is not an impossible task.

With the future forty years etched in my mind and heart, I can change everything.

“Yes. She ate well today. She used to gnaw at the nipple, but not today.”

“Seems like our Faith is growing up.”

“A one-year-old growing up? What are you talking about?”

Father’s joke made Mother laugh.

I also laughed like a child.

The smiles on my parents’ faces deepened as they saw me laugh.

They were people who felt a flood of happiness just by seeing me smile.

My parents were watching a black-and-white TV, leaning against the wall, and I glanced at it too.

Every time comedian Choi Joo-il pounded the mugwort, Mother and Father laughed heartily.

This was the era of Choi Joo-il’s prime.

An era I had experienced but couldn’t remember.

‘Let me think.’

I turned my gaze from the TV and began to envision my future.

The events that would happen to Mother.

The events that would happen to Father.

And the events that would happen to me.

I could only remember a few incidents from elementary school.

Memories are not something you can easily pull out like items from a drawer.

The ultimate goal of my life, of course, was to become the best thoracic surgeon and take revenge on the human trash, Kang Tae-sub, but that was a story for a distant future.

So, I gathered and gathered the fragments of my memories.

I organized them in chronological order from my childhood to my school days and engraved them in my heart.

Things I couldn’t forget and shouldn’t forget.

After organizing them, I felt as if I had cleaned my room, and I gained confidence that I could perfectly shape my new life.

‘But the problem is now...’

I fell into a new dilemma.

Being trapped in a one-year-old’s body with an adult’s consciousness was quite frustrating.

There was nothing I could do.

Feeding?

Soiling diapers?

The only thing I could do was to smile at my parents whenever I saw them?

‘No, I don’t have to be so negative. A one-year-old has a path suited for a one-year-old.’

I clenched my cute little fist and resolved.

I would show my parents how great the filial piety of a one-year-old can be.

* * *

The gastroenterology ward of Changsong Hospital was unusually quiet and peaceful.

There were no patients aimlessly wandering the corridors, and no patients causing a commotion at the station.

The smoking room at the end of the ward corridor was also empty, with no one smoking.

The ward was quiet during lunchtime.

How nice it would be if it were always like this at this time?

Yoo Hae, who had just finished lunch and returned to the station, enjoyed the rare moment of leisure. She even indulged in the luxury of enjoying the cool autumn breeze blowing from outside the window.

“Hae, have you eaten?”

“Yes, sir. Did you have a good meal, sir?”

Yoo Hae bowed deeply to the head nurse (nurses were not called “nurses” in this era) Kim Jin-hee, who was sitting next to her.

“Of course, I did. At our age, we have to eat well. If we skip even one meal, our stamina suffers. By the way, aren’t you very tired these days?”

“No, I’m not particularly tired.”

“You don’t have to pretend. This is a very tiring time. Do you know how hard it is to raise a baby?”

Kim Jin-hee chattered on.

“Isn’t the nursing job hard enough? Raising a baby on top of that is back-breaking. I remember how hard it was for me back then.”

“I’m really fine, sir.”

Yoo Hae smiled.

She wasn’t pretending to be fine; she genuinely felt fine.

While boasting about one’s child is a common thing, Faith was truly a born angel.

She hadn’t caused any trouble recently.

The hardest part of raising a baby is that they cry at all times.

Especially when they cry at the top of their lungs in the early morning, you feel like tearing your hair out.

But recently, Faith seemed to have forgotten how to cry.

Even when it was a bit late for feeding or when her diaper was soiled, Faith never cried.

When she was hungry, she cleverly said “mama.”

When her diaper needed changing, she poked it with her index finger.

I wondered if there was another child as polite as her in the world.

Moreover, when she came home from her nursing job, Faith’s smile made her stress fly away.

Her husband, who ran a second-hand bookshop, took care of Faith while she was at work.

He was so proud of Faith that he boasted about her to everyone in the neighborhood.

“Come on, a baby not crying? Does that even make sense?”

Kim Jin-hee snorted in disbelief after hearing Yoo Hae’s explanation.

“It’s true, sir. Why would I lie to you?”

“Alright, let’s say it’s true. You always think your own child is the best and the prettiest.”

“...”

“Organize the afternoon charts. We need to process the orders the doctors have given.”

“Yes, sir.”

When Kim Jin-hee left for a moment, Yoo Hae muttered to herself in a dejected voice.

“It’s true, but you don’t believe me.”

* * *

The first week of my reincarnation as a one-year-old was smooth and trouble-free.

The best filial piety I could offer during this time was not to cry.

Not to cry when I was hungry.

Not to cry when I soiled my diaper.

Not to cry at night when my parents were sleeping.

I had heard that the hardest part of raising a baby is that they cry at all times.

Of course, not crying didn’t mean I didn’t express myself at all.

When I was hungry, I would say “mama.”

When I needed a diaper change, I would poke my diaper with my index finger.

My filial piety hit the mark.

Thanks to my not crying, my parents found it relatively easy to raise me.

Although a wet diaper was sometimes unpleasant, it was bearable.

All the frustration melted away when I saw the smiles on my parents’ faces.

Living as a baby wasn’t as boring as I had feared.

I was mostly asleep all day.

When I was awake, I often reflected on my past life.

The mistakes and errors I had made.

The foolish and immature judgments and immature relationships I had.

I deeply reflected on these and engraved in my bones the things I must never forget.

Perhaps I was reincarnated as a baby for this very reason.

To lie still and thoroughly review my life, as if the god of medicine was giving me a chance to do so.

Thanks to this consideration, I could review my past life like a study guide and prepare to excel.

I believed without a doubt that my future life would be an A+.

“Shall we go for a walk, Faith?”

Father wrapped me in a blanket and carried me out of the room.

I was excited about the rare outing.

As soon as we stepped out of the room, the unique scent of paper from the books tickled my nose.

The bookshelves were densely packed with old and used books, and the books that couldn’t fit on the shelves were tied with ropes and lined up in the bookshop aisle.

At this time, Father ran a second-hand bookshop and wrote whenever he had a chance.

Father was a novelist who loved books and admired writing.

However, for some reason, he sold the bookshop and gave up writing when I started elementary school.

‘What a pity.’

I read Father’s unfinished masterpiece later.

I also sent the manuscript to Father’s friend and asked for a cautious evaluation.

Father’s college classmate in Korean literature wept and wept after reading Father’s unfinished work.

So, Father was one of the many Stephen Kings whose work never saw the light of day.

But since I was reincarnated, Father’s life would change 180 degrees.

Father would never give up writing and would become a successful novelist.

He would never die of heart disease (in fact, there was a connection between giving up writing and his heart disease).

Father took me on a tour of the bookshop, and I took in the sights and sounds, knowing that to protect Father, I must also protect the space he loved.

“Are you hungry, Faith?”

Father asked, looking at me.

I nodded vigorously.

Father laughed in amazement.

“I might be mistaken, but I feel like Faith understands what I’m saying. It’s impossible, of course.”

“Ababa!”

I called out to Father in a childish voice.

Father was impressed by the clear pronunciation, even for a baby.

Father, if you’re this impressed, I’m going to be in trouble.

There are many more things to come that will surprise you.