Chapter 9

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TL: Single TL Translations

Chapter 9

I settled down the moment I reached Aoi’s room. While I was still a little upset, I took off my jacket, placed the convenience store bag on the table, took the bottle of water and asked if she wanted to drink it. Aoi nodded, took a sip, and sat on the side of the table. I sat next to her and gently overlapped my hand on hers while peering into her face.

“Have you calmed down?”

“Uh-huh.”

She tightly grasped my hand back and looked at me with red and wet eyes. I was a little startled, but I muttered ‘I’m glad’ and when tried to move my head back, I felt something slowly lean against my chest. While I was confused, I let her do so and caressed her hair asking ‘what happened?’. She started talking.

“The other day, I’m sorry for getting angry in that way. I knew that you were being considerate of me because you thought of me, but when you said that to me even though it’s been a while since we last talked, I felt lonely and sad… I’m sorry. …I shouldn’t have… said that. …I’m really sorry.”

She intertwined her fingers with mine and grasped my hand back while clinging to me. It was so painful to watch I rubbed my check against her head. This girl who’s a little taller than me felt small.

“It’s okay. Well, I was a little hurt by it, but I’m sure you were hurt even more, Aoi, so it’s okay. You were busy with work too, right? There was nothing you could do about it. I phrased it badly too.”

“Yuki… you didn’t do anything wrong, it’s all my fault. I selfishly became lonely and mad… it’s because you’re kind, Yuki. I took advantage of that and acted spoiled because of your kindness.”

Kind? I began to wonder while caressing her hair. I’ve been told that I have a kind way of speaking, but I’m only interacting with her normally. I remembered the words she said about forcing myself to go along with her. So, this was the reason she said that to me. Aoi continued while crying.

“I don’t… have… confidence in myself. I always lack of words and… can’t talk well. And yet I think of a lot of things, but can’t convey them… . ….But, Yuki, you’re always kind and accepted everything… it made me happy. But, I felt anxious too and…”

“Is that why you said I’m forcing myself to go along with you?”

This girl is beautiful, cute, has a good style, and although she’s been approached by handsome guys like today, her self-evaluation is very low. It seems like she holds some kind of complex deep inside. I should talk to her more and get rid of this anxiety she feels. She’s probably been suffering for a long time because of her inferiority complex she’s held towards others. It’s truly pitiful and is even painful to me.

“…Uh-huh.”

Aoi reservedly nodded.

“I’m really happy when I’m together with you, Yuki. But, Yuki, you have a lot of friends and you’re too different from me… since you’re kind… I thought that… you might hate me and are just forcing yourself. I’m… boring and… can’t talk well… and I’m also…h-heavy, aren’t I? I’m the one who asked to be friends first… and I asked for a lot… I feel like I’m restricting you. Even though I don’t want to do things like that… my feelings aren’t catching up and… I…I…”

She doesn’t need to worry that much. I felt heartbroken. After saying that much, Aoi couldn’t handle it anymore and started softly crying. I gently rubbed her trembling back and head. When she settled down and I gently whispered into her ear ‘could you listen to me?’ she stopped crying and nodded. I need to answer Aoi’s inner voice. I grasped her hand back to try and convey my feelings to this sensitive girl.

“Well, it’s true I have a decent number of friends and go hang out often, I’ve never cared about whether someone could speak well or not. I told you that you don’t need to worry about it before, didn’t I? Just because you can’t speak well, because your feelings are heavy, have I ever been angry because of it?”

She slightly shook her head denying it. I saw that and smiled.

“You know, I’m always happy and have fun being with Aoi. That’s why I keep hanging out with and call you. You’re not boring Aoi, you have a bunch of great traits about you. You might not be aware of it, but the attitude when you convey your feelings is cute and child-like, also, you’re good at cooking and don’t you always try your best to make various dishes for me? Plus, you’re diligent when messaging me and listen to my stories, all of it makes me happy, I like it. It’s cute when you’re honest and act pampered. Also, you’re the kind one, Aoi.”

“Me?”

Aoi lifted her head that was on my chest. Her eyes were red from crying too much. She wiped her eyes and looked at me. It was something I always thought, but I guess I never told her before.

“Although it’s a little embarrassing to say, the first time we met was when I was smashed and you saved me, right? It’s only normal to ignore some random drunkard, but you looked after me and let me stay at your house. I thought you were such a kind and great girl. You’re still good to me even now, I’m glad I got to know you. Thank you for that time. Rather, I should be the one wondering whether I’m hated by you. The first time we met each other was all negative, there was no merit in it either.”

I became a little embarrassed and though I meant to say the final part in a jokingly way, she shook her head vigorously and denied it.

“There’s no way that’s true! I’ll never… come to hate you!”

“I see, thanks.”

A laugh spilled since she was cute desperately denying it. I felt ticklish and happy from her conveying her feelings to me in this way. Although Aoi was embarrassed when I laughed, she didn’t avert her eyes. I asked her ‘what happened’ with my eyes and she muttered shyly.

“I’m very happy… you said that. I also felt very… relieved when you said we can still be friends. Um… I’m the one who’s thankful. You know, I, I’m truly happy that I got to know you too, Yuki.”

“I see. Well then, with this our quarrel has ended. Don’t ponder too much from now, okay?”

“Okay. …Thanks as always.”

“Not at all. If there’s ever a time you feel anxious or something’s on your mind then tell me, okay? I want to properly understand you.”

“…Uh-huh. Thank you.”

It may have been because she was overcome with emotion, but Aoi smiled while crying. I lightly said ‘you really are a crybaby’ and patted her saying ‘there there.’ Since she replied ‘because I’m happy’ in a pouting way, I couldn’t say anything else. Aoi who tends to be anxious seems to have been finally relieved of it.

I started talking to Aoi who stopped crying and when I looked at the clock, I realized it was past 11:30 PM. I’ve already met and reconciled with Aoi, so I should get ready to leave soon. Aoi might have work tomorrow and I’ll still make it in time for the last train.

“Aoi, I should probably leave soon.”

“Huh? You’re going home? …But… it’s already nighttime, it’s dangerous.”

Aoi who just stopped crying started to have an anxious expression just as I was planning to leave. I’m weak to that expression so I wish she would stop.

“It’s fine. I still have time until the last train and I’ll be careful on the way there. Plus, you have work tomorrow, don’t you?”

“That’s… I do, but.”

I started caressing her head as a way to give her a peace of mind and while getting ready to leave, I remembered the things I bought at the convenience store.

“Alright then, try not to rub your eyes for the day, put something warm on it and sleep, okay? Also, let’s chat and make plans to hang out again. Ah, have you deleted my contact information? Oh, but I’ll contact you when I’m home so it should be fine. By the way, I bought some snacks at the convenience store, so make sure to eat those too.”

“Okay, thank you.”

When I put on my coat and adjusted my clothes, I put my hand on her face and caressed her cheeks since she looked at me with a sad expression. She narrowed her eyes happily and grabbed my hand, it was so cute I unconsciously grinned. It’s becoming a custom for me to spoil her every time I leave.

“Well then, I’ll be going now. I’ll text you later, so be sure to lock up.”

When I pulled my hand away from Aoi’s face and headed towards the front door, she grabbed my hand using both hands. Although she’s grasping my hand a little strongly, it’s the amount of strength where I could easily shake off if I put my mind to it. It was so cute my face relaxed and I laughed.

“What happened? It’ll be fine, I’ll keep in contact.”

She still had a worried expression, so I grasped her hand back, kneeled down, and looked at her. Aoi anxiously and in a reserved manner, clung to me once again.

“My work tomorrow… is from the evening. So, I want you to stay over. …No?”

It was adorable when she said it in such a reserved and anxious way, that even though I was preparing to go home, it made me want to listen to her request. It looks like I’m truly weak to her when she conveys her feelings like this. Before I was aware of it, I already smiled and nodded to her request.

“Geez, I guess there’s no helping it. Alright, let’s quickly take a shower and get ready to sleep. It’s already late.”

“Okay!”

I couldn’t help but laugh at the happy Aoi and my own pampering. I took off my coat once again and when I teased her saying ‘you’re so spoiled’ she replied ‘because I’m lonely’ in a bashful way, making me grin once more.

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