Chapter 2

They say that if you don't go through a phase of being a middle schooler, you've wasted your youth.

Everyone has experienced that period to some extent, it's just that some people express it outwardly while others keep it hidden in their hearts. It's the difference between being openly or secretly rebellious.

Song Shuhang was somewhat mature for his age, and that phase came and went quickly for him.

By the time he reached the second year of junior high, while the boys around him were still immersed in martial arts dreams, superhero fantasies, and immortal aspirations, swinging their Dragon Subduing Palms and transforming into superheroes, Shuhang had long since given up on such things.

The laws of physics in this world are so precise that a human leaping three stories high, clapping their hands to summon a golden dragon, or flying with their underwear on the outside are all impossible!

However, he still enjoyed reading immortal cultivation novels and watching superhero movies. Perhaps deep down, he still hoped that one day, superheroes, aliens, or immortals would appear before him?

Knowing it was impossible but still mysteriously looking forward to it—this is perhaps a unique human trait?

Song Shuhang smiled and closed the group chat window, but he didn't leave the group.

He found the people in the Nine Provinces Number One Group very interesting. The chat records that made people blush when read from an outsider's perspective were unexpectedly amusing. So, before the group owner kicked him out, he decided to lurk and read the various interesting chat records to pass the time.

On the computer screen, the movie continued. It seemed to be a horror film. The plot was full of suspense, and it was the masterpiece of a talented horror director. It was said that many middle-aged men had been scared to tears, and many people claimed they were too afraid to go to the bathroom alone.

Unfortunately, Song Shuhang still didn't find it scary at all. After rewinding the progress bar and watching for a while, he yawned again, slowly shifting from a sitting to a lying position, his eyelids growing heavier...

If the talented director knew his movie had such little effect, he would probably cry, right?

In a daze, Song Shuhang had a beautiful dream.

It was an incredibly pleasant dream, filled with immortals, superheroes, and various paradises.

Eternal life, moving mountains and seas, wielding a sword in the mortal world—how many people throughout history have dreamed of such things? But as they grow older, reality shatters their dreams, and they can only hide them in their hearts, no longer thinking about them.

Dreams are, after all, just dreams...

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The next day, May 21st, Tuesday, 1:00 AM.

In the chat group, the group owner, True Monarch Yellow Mountain, finally came online.

As soon as he appeared, Northern River's Loose Cultivator asked, "True Monarch, who is that 'Book Mountain Pressure' you added yesterday? Where is he cultivating?"

"Yesterday's addition? Didn't you guys talk to her? She is the daughter of an old friend of mine from this era. She seems to have good potential, already at the peak of the Third Stage Later Heaven at a young age, and is about to reach the Fourth Stage True Qi. Quite remarkable, isn't she?" True Monarch Yellow Mountain laughed and replied.

Born in this era, she must be under forty years old. To reach the peak of the Third Stage Later Heaven at that age is indeed a genius. Northern River's Loose Cultivator nodded inwardly, but he still found her Daoist name strange. 'Book Mountain Pressure' didn't seem like a proper Daoist name at all.

While Northern River's Loose Cultivator was still thinking, True Monaster Yellow Mountain suddenly said, "Wait, my old friend's daughter's Daoist name isn't 'Book Mountain Pressure.' What is this 'Book Mountain Pressure' anyway?"

"..." True Monarch Yellow Mountain was embarrassed.

It's not some random thing, it's the unknown human you added yesterday, True Monarch.

He tentatively asked, "True Monarch, did you add the wrong person?"

"Let me check."

A moment later.

True Monarch Yellow Mountain sent a series of cold sweat emojis: "I really did add the wrong person. The numbers were only one digit off, and I mistyped 8 as 9. I can't believe I made such a big mistake."

Northern River's Loose Cultivator chuckled, "I thought so. Even if you integrate into modern society, no one would name their Daoist name 'Book Mountain Pressure.'"

True Monarch Yellow Mountain continued to send cold sweat emojis.

Then he hurriedly operated to add his friend's daughter back into the group.

Group message notification: 'Feather Soft of Spirit Butterfly Island' has joined the Nine Provinces Number One Group.

This name fit the style of the Nine Provinces Number One Group, exuding a strong immortal cultivation atmosphere. 'Book Mountain Pressure' was definitely a strange intruder.

As soon as the new member joined, Mad Saber Thrice the Waves immediately popped up: "Hey, new Daoist friend, you're a fairy maiden, right? Show us a picture and tell us your measurements! If you're pretty, we can make plans!"

Mad Saber Thrice the Waves had been lurking for a long time. Although he had a goldfish memory, it was longer than three seconds. He had been reminded yesterday, so to avoid offending a senior, he had been carefully observing the situation.

Hearing that the new fairy maiden was the daughter of a friend of True Monarch Yellow Mountain and at the Third Stage Later Heaven, Mad Saber Thrice the Waves felt relieved. Since she wasn't a 'senior,' he could tease her a bit and satisfy his verbal cravings.

There were rarely new members in the group, and he had been holding back for a long time.

The moment he spoke, True Monarch Yellow Mountain's face turned dark.

"..." Feather Soft of Spirit Butterfly Island typed a series of colons, then sent a message: "Since it's late, my daughter has already started her meditation practice on time. Her account is currently being managed by me, waiting for True Monarch Yellow Mountain to add her to the group. Ahem... I've heard that Daoist Thrice the Waves in the Nine Provinces Group is charming and eloquent. It's better to see it in person than to hear about it. Daoist Thrice the Waves, I admire you, and I'll treat you to a drink someday."

Mad Saber Thrice the Waves was instantly embarrassed. Teasing a girl only to encounter her father was the most shameful thing in the world. He wanted to find a hole to hide in.

Fortunately, this senior seemed to have a laid-back personality and brushed it off with a light comment.

Then, the senior greeted everyone online and asked them to take care of his daughter in the future before going back to lurking.

Seeing the senior leave, Mad Saber Thrice the Waves breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Good, it seems this senior has a good sense of humor. Maybe there will be a chance to chat with Feather Soft herself someday."

"..." True Monarch Yellow Mountain.

"..." Northern River's Loose Cultivator.

Pharmacist rarely popped up. He was a man of few words, but this time he typed four characters: "Good luck."

"?" Thrice the Waves was puzzled.

But the man of few words, Pharmacist, clearly wouldn't explain further.

"Look at the prefix of the new member's Daoist name," Northern River's Loose Cultivator explained. "If you don't ask for death, you won't die. Why can't Brother Thrice the Waves understand this?"

"Prefix? Spirit Butterfly Island?" Mad Saber Thrice the Waves still didn't seem to get it.

"Yes, Spirit Butterfly Island! And since it's a senior, haven't you thought of anyone?" Northern River's Loose Cultivator hinted.

After a moment, Mad Saber Thrice the Waves suddenly realized and sent a series of 'kneeling' emojis in the group: "Is it that Spirit Butterfly Venerable who is meticulous about everything?"

Spirit Butterfly Venerable was a powerful senior, upright and righteous... but he had a habit of nitpicking over trivial matters, reaching the pinnacle of being meticulous. Others were meticulous, but he was meticulous to the point of being pedantic!

Northern River's Loose Cultivator was so angry that his mouth twitched: "I didn't say that!"

True Monarch Yellow Mountain sighed, unable to bear it any longer: "Thrice the Waves, my old friend is just managing the account but hasn't logged out yet."

In other words... the chat records might be seen.

No, they would definitely be seen!

True Monarch Yellow Mountain couldn't let Thrice the Waves continue to court disaster. After all, he was a junior in his group.

"Damn, I'm doomed," Mad Saber Thrice the Waves imagined the future where Spirit Butterfly Venerable would visit and torture him. His eyes welled up with tears. This time, he seemed to have offended an even more troublesome senior?

Thrice the Waves cried out, "True Monarch, please plead for me!"

True Monarch Yellow Mountain sent a cold shoulder emoji.

The people in the group ignored Thrice the Waves' dog-like cries and calmly changed the topic.

Northern River's Loose Cultivator asked the group owner, "True Monarch, what should we do about 'Book Mountain Pressure'?"

Su Clan's Seven said, "Should we kick him out? After all, he's just an ordinary person and can't really participate in our conversations."

"Cough, since I added him by mistake, it can be considered a kind of fate. Let me cast a divination to see how to handle it," True Monarch Yellow Mountain replied—mainly because he suddenly added the person to the group, and now saying to kick him out would be embarrassing.

So, at least he would cast a divination as a formality, as an excuse, and then kick the person out.

This way, he could maintain his high and mighty image.

Secondly, he had recently become very interested in divination, learning it for a month and feeling itchy to practice. He liked to cast a divination before doing anything.

He used a book of Tang poetry and Song lyrics to cast the divination, flipping through it and using the secret technique of divination. A line of poetry was drawn out, forming a divination image.

This time, the divination went smoothly. It was the first time since learning divination that True Monarch Yellow Mountain felt so in tune with it!

He looked at the divination result with delight.

Then...

True Monarch Yellow Mountain's face turned grim.

True Monarch Yellow Mountain's expression soured.

The divination image read: "In heaven, we wish to be birds flying wing to wing; on earth, we wish to be branches intertwined."

He remembered that this line was written by a poet named Bai Juyi in the Tang Dynasty, a classic often used to describe love.

Suddenly, True Monarch Yellow Mountain felt terrible.

Wing to wing, my sister! Intertwined branches, my sister! To wish to be intertwined branches, I'd rather hang myself from a southeastern branch!

Was he, the great True Monarch Yellow Mountain, supposed to play out a life-and-death, earth-shattering love story with the male 'Book Mountain Pressure'? This reminded him of Longyang Jun from the Warring States period—making him feel as if he had swallowed a cockroach, extremely nauseated.

"This must be due to my insufficient divination skills, after all, I've only been learning for a month... So I should cast another divination! Yes, that must be it!" True Monarch Yellow Mountain used the secret technique of divination again, and the mysterious force flipped through the book of Tang poetry and Song lyrics.

Another line of poetry was drawn out.

This time, the secret technique of divination ran smoothly, and True Monarch Yellow Mountain felt great, absolutely certain of the result!

He looked at the divination image.

Then...

The True Monarch's face turned pale.

The divination image read: "If love is a lasting thing, why should it be limited to being together every day and night?"

"Your grandfather, night!"

"I really don't believe in this!" True Monarch Yellow Mountain cast the divination again.

This time, it felt even better, and True Monarch Yellow Mountain felt his divination skills reach their peak!

This time, it must be right!

He looked down at the divination image: "Suddenly looking back, that person is there, in the dimly lit corner."

"..."

"Deep breath, deep breath." True Monarch Yellow Mountain calmly closed the book of Tang poetry and Song lyrics, looking at the sky at a 45-degree angle, feeling very melancholic.

Then, he calmly tore the hardcover book of Tang poetry and Song lyrics to pieces, nodding vigorously as he did so: "I clearly don't have the talent for divination. I'm not meant to be a diviner. So, the divination results I got must be wrong!"

He threw the torn pieces of the book to the side, vowing never to cast a divination again!

He typed in the group: "As for 'Book Mountain Pressure'... let's keep him for now. I just cast a divination and found that he and I have a connection. Adding him to the group was not a coincidence but a necessity! What happens next is up to his own destiny."

The True Monarch used various divination terms to cover up, and he would never reveal the results of the divination, even if it killed him!

Damn it, even if there is a connection, it must be a cursed one!

"Then let's keep him. He'll probably leave the group himself soon. By the way, what was the result of your divination?" Northern River's Loose Cultivator had heard that the True Monarch was learning divination and was curious about what the senior had divined.

"..." True Monarch Yellow Mountain: "That's it, you guys continue chatting, I have an emergency and need to log off."

With that, he quickly logged off, leaving Northern River's Loose Cultivator looking puzzled.

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