Chapter 10

I am beautiful and cute.

To all women, I was an object of envy.

Someone once said,

I was the reincarnation of an angel.

I disliked that expression.

Comparing me to an angel, the fact that they did so was displeasing.

I am far more beautiful than any angel.

By the time I was old enough to understand, I knew my worth and understood it.

That is why I have always played the role of the kind of woman that men desire with all my might.

The beginning... what was it?

Crest, unlike other men, did not seem to be very interested in me.

So, I made an effort to get his attention.

My family is also a ducal house. Since Crest and I were close in age, we had many opportunities to interact.

I investigated Crest's preferences and tried to act as his ideal woman.

However... Crest still did not seem to be interested in me.

He would often say,

"...It's better not to get involved with me. You might end up being treated badly too."

Even when I denied it, Crest never gained confidence in himself.

Gradually, I became more and more interested in such a Crest.

The number of times I spoke with Crest increased.

Crest always responded seriously to any version of me. Even when I showed a bit of my true self, Crest accepted it without surprise.

Even the cruel side of me, which I never showed to anyone else, Crest accepted.

I wanted such a Crest. So, I asked my father.

To make Crest my fiancé.

When I talked to my father, the proposal was quickly relayed to the Haberst family.

It didn't take long for the engagement to be decided.

It was at a ball one day.

As usual, I was surrounded by many men.

Among them was Crest's older brother.

So, I glanced at them and said with an elegant smile,

"I will be engaged to Crest."

"Huh...?"

Crest's brothers were surprised and wide-eyed.

I had asked my parents to stop the talks for this very reaction.

I took Crest's arm, who was looking at me with surprise, and walked away.

The shocked faces of Crest's brothers, who usually called him worthless, made my chest feel lighter.

To me, Crest's brothers were nothing more than Crest's brothers.

After a while, we started attending the same school.

At the academy where the children of nobles gathered, Crest studied swordsmanship to become a knight, and I received education to become a suitable wife for a noble.

Crest... was a genius with the sword. Overflowing with talent, he always dominated the other nobles in mock battles.

I was proud of him. I even boasted to my friends to a degree that wouldn't make me seem too unpleasant.

"That's my fiancé."

But, that was a mistake.

Crest received too much attention.

Before I knew it, Crest was in a position where he was the focus of all the girls in the school.

After mock battles, he would always receive gifts from someone.

Crest had his own position. Though from a ducal family, he was the fifth son.

Considering the family, he couldn't treat the daughters of other nobles coldly.

--- I knew that.

But, I was consumed by intense jealousy.

Always receiving gifts from everyone, scratching his head as he accepted them.

Surrounded by everyone, Crest would finally come to me at the end --.

"Crest, don't get too carried away. Your fiancée is me, you know."

It started with this level of jealousy.

A light jealousy. Crest responded with a wry smile, and I laughed as if it were a joke.

However, the flame of jealousy burned fiercely within me.

"Crest, don't talk to other women too much."

"You... I appointed you as my fiancé, you know?"

"Crest, you are worthless without me. Don't get that wrong."

Gradually, my thoughts became a mess.

--- I don't want you to talk to other women.

I want you to look at me only. I only look at you.

--- I don't want you to gain confidence and distance yourself from me.

From then on, I made an effort to diminish Crest's value.

I did the opposite of what I had done before.

My influence was strong. If I said white was black, everyone would follow.

So, it was only a moment before people stopped gathering around Crest.

The time Crest spent with me increased.

But... I was still anxious.

So, I decided to make Crest dependent on me next.

I wanted to break Crest's spirit and make him dependent on me, so he couldn't live without me.

So, I made every effort to break Crest's spirit.

... And that -- was supposed to be completed just now.

Crest was supposed to be saved by me and swear absolute loyalty to me.

It was supposed to happen, but...

I snapped my eyes open. As soon as I woke up, I remembered the dream I had just seen, and my chest tightened.

... I spent the whole day resting in my room.

I had fallen ill soon after visiting Crest's room, and I was told to rest.

... I was wrong.

In the dream, I only thought of my own convenience and negated Crest.

The fevered, hazy mind made me calm down.

If I had realized it sooner... If I could have been more honest and clung to Crest, asking him to stay by my side...

Thinking of the words Crest said when he negated me, my chest ached.

It's only natural that Crest hates me...

I reached out my arm and grabbed the pillow on the bed.

I coughed.

--- I don't think I can be forgiven now.

Still... when I recover from my cold, I will go to apologize.

Crest is definitely being sent to the lower world on the 15th.

So, I still have time.

I will apologize... and if, if I can start over...

Just then, a maid came into the room.

"Miss, have you woken up?"

"... Yes. More importantly, I will visit Crest again tomorrow. Please prepare for it."

"... Miss. I have something difficult to say... Crest has already moved to the lower world today."

"Huh...?"