Chapter 0 - Dream vision

Dream vision

Oh oh ~ It doesn’t matter A great dream is never long-lasting

Without the right to hope The heart is empty and lost

– ภาพฝัน (Saw Saw Saw)

One night in the middle of February that was too hot to be in winter, I was wearing my university uniform [1] with a can of empty beer in my hand, half walking half jogging through the empty street in the middle of the village.

I should have run passed the alley on the side, which cut into the backroad beside the village that would take me to the main road, however, my legs were frozen, and something made me turn to the side.

The street light kept flicking on and off like in some kind of horror movie, at that moment, a light suddenly shined which made my eyesight blurry, after that, I saw something that truly made my whole body freeze.

… a purple fireball was floating midair, along with the noise of explosions in the middle of the street.

“…”

H-hello, wait a second.

I repeatedly blinked my eyes and try to look again, instead of the previously empty street, I saw two guys shooting power-like explosion at each other. Most importantly, one of them is currently floating in the air with balls of light that looked almost like a lamp in their hand, except those lights seemed closer to a superpower that you can see from the protagonist in cartoons because they were being hurled at each other and both kept leaping to dodge the attacks while sending something similar to fireballs back and forth.

“…I must be drunk.” I breathed out those words unconsciously. I assumed that I was drunk from the empty beer can that is still in my hand, and since I have never been drunk in my life, I have never guessed that the symptoms of being drunk would be such a fantasy as if fusing Kamen Rider with Harry Potter-like this… is this beer or marijuana?

With a stupid conviction that all of this must be a hallucination, I continued to walk forward, looking to see if this is really a hallucination. But at the moment that I took a step, I heard a loud sound of thunder right next to my ears, sending a pain so sharp that I needed to sit down and cover my ears “Ouchhhhh!”

While my ears were ringing non-stop, I heard a panicked voice of a man come through.

“How can you destroy and pass through the barrier!?”

…hah, what barrier,? is it the name of a new male lead? I frowned while turning up to look at the man.

In front of me was a man with no memorable features, he is male, and dressed like a regular office worker. That’s a little strange of him… no, actually, a very strange thing about him is that his body was floating midair and underneath him stood a teenager in a school uniform [1] that was covered in blood, with his shirt not tucked into his pants properly.

“You…” The teenager tried to say something, but suddenly dash to me and dragged my body into a run. I’m not small by any means, but I still got dragged along by this teenager even if I tried to resist.

“What are you doing…”

Before I can finish my sentence, a fireball rush at me as if I were in a cartoon. The floating man shouted with a furious voice “Still trying to run!?”

…. Ok. So I’m not actually drunk, right? I thought in a daze. The surrounding around me slows down to a slow-motion. The teenager that was dragging me turned back to and flicked his hand slapping the mysterious fireball to the side. A noise like explosions sounds again with a poor streetlamp bombed broken and fallen down on the road.

I gasp with my mouth wide open. If I’m really drunk, then I’m definitely not drunk on beer but high on marijuana!!

Before I can decide what to do, I hear another shout.

“So noisy! what the Fu*k are you doing!? Other people need to sleep!”

After that shout, the house lights in the neighborhood simultaneously turn on one after another. The teenager who is now half dragging half holding me immediately pulls me into the nearest alley. I wasn’t really paying attention to the surrounding, but the next thing I noticed, the floating man was already gone.

“Hey! Who threw a bomb here?”

“Oh my god! Someone hurry, call the police!”

In the midst of the panicking people, I am standing in the deserted alley looking at the mysterious teenager. He had his hair cut short, skin sun-tanned, his school uniform was full of rips and tears, and blood splattered. Under the flicking light similar to a cheap- grade B horror movie, I felt the cold current running along the nape of my neck.

He looks at me quietly, before stretching out his hand to me which startled me in an awkward sense. At first, I thought I was going to be killed to keep quiet the secret of the government or something along the line, but the reality is just a handkerchief he is offering me.

“…” I am very confused.

The teenager didn’t say anything but lift the handkerchief to wipe away the tear tracks on my cheek gently which surprised me. Granted, I was crying really hard before, but I never thought that my tear gland would not stop even if I went through a shooting action movie like this.

The teenager slowly and gently wipes my cheek as if I am some treasured porcelain, his gentle action makes my heart feel strangely warm. After taking a good look at his face, I accidentally laughed.

“I think it’s you who needs to use the handkerchief more than me.”

He makes a face of surprise. I pull out my handkerchief and stretch out my hand to wipe away the blood on his temple gently. He looks taken off guard before starting to smile… a smile so innocent that sent warmth through my heart.

Despite the fact that I ran out staggering through the street from grief and sadness enough to want to disappear, but after seeing strange people shooting off power at each other like in the Super Rider movie, I suddenly feel that my sadness and suicidal thoughts are all silly and non-important.

Actually, Living is just like this…

I tightly clutch the shirt of the teenage boy while whispering softly.

“Can you please…”

“…”

I open my eyes. The first thing I saw is the door, then the stuff cluttering around the room, I can also hear the sound of the old ceiling fan that is kind of scary since it might fall on me someday. I am now lying on my side on the bed, after gathering my thoughts, I finally try to recall the story.

…A dream.

There are tear stains at the corner of my eyes.

I try blinking repeatedly to push away the feeling of unshed tears before letting out a sign.

Come to think of it, many years have passed … I put my fingers up to count … one.. two… it’s been six years since that incident. I am still unsure if it is real or just a dream. The only proof of that event is the broken street lamp, but the CCTV at the front of the village shows no picture of anyone entering.

As for that teenager, by now, I have already forgotten his face.

I let out a yawn while scratching at the back of my neck… ah, I’m currently naked, and from the look of the clothes crumpled on the floor, I probably randomly stripped myself naked before going to bed last night. That makes sense since I am feeling strangely sticky… It really is April now. I rubbed my eyes trying to rid myself of the trance before slowly starting to move my body, but in the second that I tried to flip to the other side.

“Oh, Ouch Ouch Ouch Ouch.” I clutch my head as the sharp headache shoots pain through my spine making me curl myself up trying to relieve the pain.

Yesterday, I got drunk like a dog. Getting dumped by my boyfriend was part of the reason, but it is inevitable since he is not the only one I am dating, and I don’t really love him that much anyway… It’s just that, I am the type of person who lacks love, so the realization of losing one of the people who love me really makes me feel strangely empty.

Or maybe I am just finding an excuse to get drunk.

I rolled my eyes before my hand hit something solid and definitely not the bed. Now come to think of it, why am I lying on my side at such a far corner of the bed that I am almost falling out? My bed is not even that large, to begin with. I blink confusingly while my hand continues to press on that mysterious mass a couple more times… what is this? It is so hard and solid, with some ridges…

“Ugh.” a mysterious voice sounded. My hand froze before I started pulling it back, slowly turning to the side of the bed that is next to the wall which should really be empty, and my light of sight is met with…

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

A soundless shout resounded in my head. I spend more than five minutes breathing and trying to get myself under control. Now wait.. first of all… let’s try to analyze the situation one by one.

First, I am naked.

Second, on the bed, there are stains of you-know-what-it-is

and third, next to me laid a very naked man with my hand on his muscled abs.

“Hmmm..” The guy moans. Giving me a startle so bad that I almost did not lift my hand off of him fast enough.

“Holy sh*t.” Is this a TV drama? It must be a drama or maybe I am definitely still dreaming. From the day I was born, a person like Phat (me) have never imagined that I will ever face the day that I met the situation of ‘waking up with an unknown person on the side, finding myself having had sex with them… ’ like this. Wait! have sex? Yeah.. wait a sec!

I gather my senses to think back to the last five minutes when I try to lift my body, there was some pain… but something still seems off “hahaha..” I take a deep breath before checking again by trying to pull myself up quickly. “Ugh… Damn! So sore!”

Yes, it’s clear now, very very clear, so crystal clear, sharp, clear, great.

Yes… now I want to cry.

“Hey, you! wake up!” I, who still can’t make up my mind of how to get out of a real-life, after-the-news Thai drama scene like this, decided to have someone else taking responsibility by trying to shake the person next to me awake. At least wake up to lit a smoke while scorning me so I can cry some crocodile tears, please!

The other person gradually opens his eyes. Oh my, he is actually very handsome too… From the look of it, he should be a little younger than me. His body is a little taller and bigger than mine, with long limbs. Those pair of sharp eyes staring at me in a daze as if still half asleep. Before I can say something to him, my eyes finally notice the time on the clock at the top of my bed which is pointing at 10 A.M.

Wait… 10 A.M… 10 A.M.!?

“Holy sh*t!! My job interview!”

I immediately push myself out of the bed, before distorting my face from the pain that went through my muscles. Ouch! Damn! I grit my teeth and jump into the shower, quickly running through the routine before coming back out naked since I can not afford to care anymore, besides, everything should and should not have been seen has probably already been seen last night.

I started dressing myself up to get ready while observing the certain item(s) – that the health education teachers had repeatedly instructed to use, which could be bought at any convenient store, but still, the teen pregnancy continues to be high in Thailand anyway – laying there quietly at the bottom of the trash bin. At least I can be relieved that there is no need to waste another fifteen minutes for the conversation of ‘Hi honey, can we both go check for diseases and maybe come back to trade to result with each other later please?’

From the corner of my vision, I can see the other guy dressing up in a university uniform … which was the pile of clothes that I have seen spewing about my room earlier. I grab my bag and the folder of documents which were piled together at the corner of the room while throwing a spare key at that man. Actually, I am a little worried about being robbed too, but the only thing valuable in my room is just a very old desktop computer… which I don’t mind if it’s really stolen. “Please lock the room when you go out. Bye!”

Because I was so engrossed in the thought about my job interview, I only saw his smile from the corner of my eyes. I don’t know why… At that moment, I felt my heart pounding like it’s about to explode. Next thing I noticed, I was already sitting red-faced in a taxi.

It took a long moment before I realized.

That his smile looks so similar to the smile of that teenage boy from my dream… the boy with the face that I have already forgotten.

“There is no such coincidence in life…” I chuckle to myself and the documents in my hand before closing my eyes and lean back on the seat, letting that mysterious smile fade out.

Leaving only my own shaking whisper in the dream that still haunts me.

“Can you please … hug me… just for tonight… make me yours.”

Footnotes:

[1] Thai High school uniform . Thai university uniform . (Yes, I selected celebrity pictures on purpose.)