Chapter 63

"Should we get closer?"

There's one good thing about not having a schedule, and that's how easy it is to take a vacation.

If I had a schedule today, I wouldn't have had the nerve to bring it up.

I asked for understanding from my manager and the other members and was able to skip a day of practice. I only said it was for personal reasons, but everyone readily told me to go and come back. They said they believed I wouldn't do anything foolish.

"I'll go up first."

My parents said they would park the car and check out the small cottage at the bottom of the hill first. They must be considerate, giving me some alone time.

I climbed the small hill and found the silver magnolia I had seen before. The tree, which was about my height, had grown much taller. Even in winter, the green leaves welcomed me.

"Are you doing well, Hyun-oh?"

It's already been a year. Because I've been so busy, it doesn't feel like a year has passed. It feels like yesterday when I was struggling after Hyun-oh left.

"Hyun-oh. Are you watching from there? How do you think I'm doing?"

Am I keeping the promise I made to Hyun-oh, to achieve his dream with the voice he gave me?

"Still, I made my debut after a year?"

I'm still just a sprout, but making a debut is a big step forward, isn't it? They say starting is half the battle.

"Sometimes I wonder what Hyun-oh would think if he knew I debuted as an idol."

Would he pat his knee and say he knew it would happen? Or would he say he's sorry for forcing his dream on me?

Either way, I believe Hyun-oh would firmly believe that I can succeed as an idol. Even when I had a monster-like voice, Hyun-oh always praised me.

"Hyun-oh. Now that I've become an idol, I think I understand why you loved this world."

A world that is intense but thrilling. A world where there's no guarantee that effort will yield results, but without effort, there's no success. A world where it's hard to reach the top, but if you do, you can receive almost infinite love.

"Even though it started for Hyun-oh, I don't regret it. I'm even grateful that you introduced me to this world, Hyun-oh."

So don't worry about me.

I sat facing the young silver magnolia and slowly recounted the things I had experienced. I talked about the fun things, the absurd things, and even complained about the tough times.

"Talking like this makes it feel like I'm really talking to you... It feels like the opposite of before, where I talk and you listen."

Even then, our communication was one-sided, but we understood each other.

Even though Hyun-oh is no longer in this world, I believe his existence will never completely disappear as long as I, his trace, am alive.

"How exciting it would be if Hyun-oh could chat with me."

I know it's an impossible desire, but I can't help but wish for it.

"I'll push it to the future, so don't forget me, Hyun-oh."

As long as Hyun-oh remembers me, we can connect no matter how far into the future it is.

Like soulmates.

* * *

The members of Theora are at an age where they would normally be in school, whether high school or college.

However, among the members, only I and Seohoon are attending school regularly.

Ji-on and Chorok said they are satisfied with a high school diploma. They explained that most idols become negligent in their studies due to their activities.

Bakha and O-ran did enroll in high school, but they dropped out because it was difficult to balance their training and school life. So officially, they are middle school graduates.

"Seohoon and I-won are going to school, so I'm going to prepare for the high school equivalency exam! Being a middle school graduate is a bit...!"

Bakha declared her determination firmly. Despite having no particular desire to study and having committed her life to being an idol? The other members, including me, found it strange because we know Bakha well.

"What's the matter? Embarrassed by the middle school graduate title? I don't think so. Bakha is always so confidently blunt."

Although O-ran's words were a bit harsh, everyone agreed with the content.

"I'm not ashamed of being a middle school graduate, but I thought I should be a role model for the fans!"

O-ran commented that Bakha, who is usually cheerful and even seems a bit naive, was thinking deeply. She was immediately reprimanded.

"It's a good idea. In terms of showing our diligence to the fans, it will at least prove that we're not ignorant."

Given the special circumstances of being entertainers, the atmosphere was understanding. However, there was nothing bad about passing the high school equivalency exam.

O-ran still believed that knowing practical current affairs was better. But since there was no harm in taking the exam, she decided to challenge it.

Theora's schedule still had many empty days. If something comes up, it might have to be postponed until next year, but they decided to study hard during the free time.

Bakha and O-ran opened their high school equivalency exam books whenever they had free time outside of practice.

Although it's tough to dedicate their break time to studying, they can also gain a lot of satisfaction. The other members decided to help them.

Chorok said he couldn't help because he majored in arts and physical education and had been away from studying for a long time. He couldn't even touch math or science.

Chorok, who was going to give up and watch from a distance, was caught by O-ran and Bakha.

They were more delighted because Chorok was so reluctant to study. They were eager to include him in the study group.

"We can't study alone!"

"You might end up embarrassing yourself on TV for being ignorant?"

Did Chorok think O-ran's warning was not just for others? Chorok was forced to read current affairs books whenever he had free time. Bakha forced him to absorb the knowledge she spouted about Korean language, social studies, and Korean history.

Bakha's method of memorizing by teaching others made the other members start studying as well. Even the manager, unintentionally, ended up attending Bakha's lectures.

"Manager, to stop Bakha, we should make a high school equivalency exam study video."

Then it would feel like studying with NewTube subscribers rather than just us.

Did my suggestion seem right? The manager immediately went to get a NewTube camera and set up Bakha's space.

If it were live, it would be a real group study, but there was a risk of mistakes. So it seemed they decided to go with NewTube.

The manager told Bakha it would be a waste to study alone and suggested making a video to study with the fans.

In reality, it was the manager's last resort to escape Bakha's repetitive lectures, but Bakha didn't need to know that.

Theora members finally regained their peace.

"We can study until the second broadcast!"

I'm the only actual test-taker, but Bakha seemed more like a test-taker than me. She studied hard but also made sure to show off.

I shook my head and opened the math practice book. Despite the noise, it sparked my motivation to study. The increasing number of books in the dorm was a clear sign.

Maybe after the college entrance exam, I'll be grateful to Bakha?

"Do you need anything? Manager and I are going to EN-Mart."

Ji-on, who was dissatisfied with the cooking from last week's monitoring, volunteered to go shopping.

Cooking is a hobby and a way to relieve stress for Ji-on. Being dissatisfied means the stress wasn't properly relieved.

For Ji-on's stress management, the trip to the mart was necessary. The manager agreed to go with him.

"I'll go too."

I firmly closed the practice book I had just opened.

It was an opportunity to get closer to Ji-on. Both Ji-on and I are the type who maintain personal space. We need to make an effort to get closer.

I decided to take the chance. There was nothing to lose.

"Ji-on and I-won, a new combination? Be careful and follow the manager well."

Chorok put masks and caps on us, warning us to follow the manager. He was confident that nothing would go wrong if we followed the manager.

The manager has a strong presence that can instantly subdue even the toughest opponents.

"We'll guard the dorm well while you're at the mart!"

There's nothing particularly valuable in the dorm, only valuable people. As long as the members are safe, it's fine. I waved instead of answering.

* * *

EN Mart was bustling after a long time. It was the time when office workers come to the mart after work, so it couldn't be avoided. We should have come at a less busy time, but it was too late to think of that.

"Let's buy the cooking ingredients quickly and go back. If you're recognized, people might gather."

The manager overestimates us. Honestly, Theora's recognition isn't that high. We're also covered with beanies and masks.

To save time, Ji-on gave us tasks.

"I-won, since we're short on time, please find and bring the ramen, shampoo, and tissues."

Ji-on seemed to deliberately ask me to bring pre-packaged items. Fresh foods that require checking freshness and condition are difficult for someone like me who doesn't know much about cooking.

I got another cart and picked out the tissues and shampoo we use at the dorm.

For six members, I chose one bundle of each type of ramen. I was considering adding a new brand when I felt a piercing gaze from the side.

The source of the gaze was an auntie shopping. She seemed to be glancing at me discreetly. It was more stimulating.

Did she recognize me? Is it just my imagination?

Was my nearly silver hair sticking out of the beanie? I checked with my fingers, but it wasn't.

Recognizing someone just by their eyes is the highest level of difficulty, right? I must be too sensitive. It can't be the early stages of stardom.

Since she didn't speak directly to me, I grabbed another ramen package and continued to think.

"Excuse me…"

"Yes?"

I thought she wouldn't speak to me until I passed. The hesitant auntie mustered up the courage.

"Are you the idol who was on TV last week? I-won Ham? That was your name, right…."

Wow! It wasn't a mistake! Indeed, public broadcasting!

I didn't expect someone to recognize me from a late-night show.

"You recognized me."

Her eye for detail was amazing. How did she recognize me? There are many people with similar eyebrows and eyes.

"Right! I was unsure because your face was covered."

"Auntie, how did you know it was me?"

"Your eyes are unique, right? You're tall and slender, but your face is small, so I was sure. Even if you weren't the idol I saw on TV, I thought you weren't an ordinary person. Hehe."

Is that so...? Since entering the entertainment industry, I've only seen beautiful and handsome people, so my standards of beauty have been shaken. Compared to other senior idols and actors, I seem pretty ordinary...

"Can you sign something for me? I want to give it to my daughter."

"I can, but I don't have a pen…."

"I have one. I always carry it just in case."

It made sense for a name pen to come out of her handbag. She might have put it in by chance. But the next item that came out was...

"......?"

I was speechless and could only blink at the item.

Because it was Theora's debut album that came out of the bag.