CH 4

It was already getting late in the night, so after taking a bath to freshen up, I sat on my pipe bed and dried my hair with a hairdryer, and without any particular purpose in mind, I turned on the TV and watched the program on the screen.

As is common for late-night shows, what was being broadcasted was a ghost story-telling program.

This type of program has been around for a long time. Period dramas and other programs are broadcast only on dedicated channels these days, but they are still broadcast on OTA TV, so there must be specific listeners.

Well, as expected, them being broadcasted often means they’re also running out of ideas, as all of them are just things I heard somewhere. For example, in “The Latest Urban Legends,” there is an incident in which , where all the Adventurers around here hang out……”

It’s a town with a name that instantly makes me understand the public’s perception of Adventurers in that world.

“Hello, it’s Mary-san. Treated as a pitiful beautiful girl who has no relatives, Mary-san is now under the care of the Adventurers……”

[Houu.]

Well, that certainly is a reasonable personal story. She grasped the Adventurers’ sympathy by acting as an orphan with no family huh.

“Especially when I said “Mary-san just remembered, but I’m on my way to kill the Demon King”, my immediate goal, everyone was surprisingly kind, saying things like, “I’ll introduce you to a good hospital when we get to town,” and “Since you’re a good girl, why don’t we drink a potion that will clear your head”……”

[The meaning of that pitiful is quite pressing, don’t you think!?]

“Also, the Adventurers follow a meritocracy doctrine. Having defeated the bandit leader and the Goblin King, a young adventurer who adores Mary-san took the initiative in taking care of me. Leading such a young man by the nose, what a sinful woman, Mary-san is……”

[Ahh~~……]

Somehow, I feel like because she was a practitioner of knives, the one with the lowest position among the Adventurers drew the short end of the stick and was forced to feed and raise Mary-san to prevent her from getting into a bad mood…… I mean, not only is the guy being forced to take care of her, he was also being extorted by said person. How pitiful.

“And so, I had him run to the nearest convenience store for a light snack before breakfast just now, but he sure is useless……”

You’re eating a light meal before breakfast, lots of carbs x carbs x fat = yakisoba bread’s destructive calories.

“Their drinks and ice cream are especially bad. There’s cucumber-flavored soda, and if it’s not that, it would either be shiso, red bean or salted watermelon-flavored. Their sodas make me think people here are crazy. Then, there’s their corn potage-flavored ice cream, stew-flavored, spaghetti-flavored, melon bread-flavored, etc. This world is just so crazy that I can’t keep up……!”

Even though her sense of taste made her think the other world’s seasonal flavors were thought up by crazy people, knowing the cruelty of the real world that Mary-san doesn’t know about, I involuntarily looked away from my phone gently.

And then, the semi-transparent woman in my hallucinations, who had been complaining just out of sight, went back to acting like she was crying.

Geez, this hallucination is annoying……

I don’t know if she’s my hallucination or my delusion, but I can’t physiologically accept this attention-seeking woman. Even if she’s just my delusion (I still can’t get rid of the possibility that Mary-san could just be my hallucination or someone out there’s pranking me), Mary-san, who has a smooth brain and is easy to manage, is ten thousand times better than her.

“Hello, it’s Mary-san. That being the case, if I ordered pizza or sushi over there, they would probably have delivered it here within 30 minutes……”

[Even if it’s P*zza-la or G*nza, there’s no way they’d have the technology to cross over different dimensions!]

There wouldn’t be one, right? I guess so…….

“Mhmm…… Then, what about W*tami Takushoku……? If it’s that company and their President, it wouldn’t have been unnatural for them to make a deal with the devil……”

I felt somewhat better when I realized that we were arguing in our usual tone about something irrelevant.

[(Haaahhh~~)…… I feel most calming now that I’m talking to Mary-san (It’s okay to reflexively speak my mind after all).]

When I honestly spoke out my thoughts, I felt Mary-san gasp on the other end of the phone.

[H- Hello, it’s Mary-san. S- Suddenly acting affectionate won’t increase Mary-san’s Affection Meter! Mary-san isn’t such a cheap woman so———- For now, let’s get married in a chapel with a view of the sea……!”

Doesn’t that sound more like your Affection Meters have suddenly surpassed the maximum!?

……Well, I’m feeling more like a male who has been spotted by a female praying mantis, so her telling me all that doesn’t make me happy about it. Even so, she’s too easy. As I had thought, she really must be another one of my delusions!?

[————How much libido have I gathered!?]

“Wha———— Hello, it’s Mary-san. What’s the matter……?”

Perhaps sensing something unusual from my unintentional scream, Mary-san asked on the other end of the call.

I don’t really have anything to hide, so I told her about the unusual changes that happened since last night———– It seems like the stress of living in the city has been causing me to keep seeing hallucinations of a woman I don’t even know.

[Well, no matter how you think about it, this is definitely a hallucination. Even though I say she’s my hallucination, she’s totally not in my strike zone. I mean, for something that should have been my hallucination, she should have a little more————]

In at least a little bit of revenge, I repeatedly called out the “hallucination” part as I wanted whatever that woman was to hear it, to which the hallucination woman responded……

“I’m not a hallucination…… Uuuuuu……”

Perhaps no longer confident in her own existence, her body started blinking in and out like a fading fluorescent light and she sorrowfully cried.

If I continue at this rate, I may be able to overcome this delusion on my own.

As I secretly found hope, for some reason, I heard a grumpy Mary’s reply through my phone.

“Hello, it’s Mary-san. Could it be an Evil Spirit or an Earthbound Spirit that possessed you……?”

[Evil Spirit, Earthbound Spirit……?]

I couldn’t help parroting the words Mary-san said out loud.

Immediately after, the soaking wet woman regained her vividness and nodded her head with tremendous vigor.

Slamming my phone on the bed, I was dumbfounded.

What the heck is this!? The idea was so original I didn’t even think of that possibility!

—————However, just as I was thinking about that, seeing the woman nodding her head in agreement, looking so elated, I kinda don’t want to admit that that was the case.

[……No, such psychic phenomena can’t possibly exist in reality. Especially so early in the morning.]

“Hello, it’s Mary-san. I don’t care about that, so just pass the phone to her already! While these eyes of mine are black, I will not let other Evil Spirit disregard my presence here. I’ll make sure to discipline her……!”

Mary-san seemed to be annoyed, but I felt like passing the phone was indirectly acknowledging the existence of that hallucination, something that makes me feel like I’m compromising, which was annoying in its own way.

[Ahh, guess I’ll go prepare my breakfast. I might carelessly leave my phone on speaker while I’m doing that, but that’s something I won’t notice.]

Deliberately speaking to myself, I stood up and went to the kitchen.

“Hello, it’s Mary-san. You there! I don’t know wherever you d*mned thieving cat came from, but trying to catch other people’s prey without permission, you’re just a lowly spirit with no manners! You there, answer me……!!”

Mary’s chagrined cry rang out from the distance.

In response to her words……

“I’ve always been in this room, so if asked who it is that got to him first———–“

“I’m not afraid of you either———–“

It seems that some kind of hallucination voiced out her protest, but of course, being a man of common sense, those are things I didn’t hear.

[……Since the rice is already cooked, I guess I’ll fry up some sunny-side-up eggs. I guess I’ll try making miso soup while I’m at it.]

Checking the rest of the ingredients I brought from my parents’ house, I thought about the breakfast menu.

I did learn how to cook for myself, but I’m still at a stage where some of my meals are made through trial-and-error, so cooking takes me some time.

“Hello, it’s Mary-san. Alright, this calls for war……!!”

By the time I’ve finished my preparations here, the argument over there will hopefully be over by then…… though that doesn’t seem to be possible.

Feeling resigned, I started boiling water.