Chapter 5

Short version.

From the perspective of the trashy crown prince.

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I was stripped of my status as crown prince and banished to the detached palace.

So what.

I lost my ‘fated partner’...!!

Ah, Mu-Lan... Mu-Lan!

My ‘fated partner’...!

I didn’t know!

I didn’t realize!

Why didn’t I realize...!

Mu-Lan noticed on the first day we met, but I...!

Ah, why didn’t you tell me, Mu-Lan.

If you had, I wouldn’t have done such a thing.

If you had said something, I would have changed.

I would have made sure not to be disliked by my ‘fated partner.’

I remember vividly the cruel things I did to her.

It all started when someone mocked Mu-Lan for coming to see me almost every day after our first greeting, calling her a “stalker.” I want to punch myself for thinking that way.

It was due to some unpleasant incident I can’t even remember now.

I hurled countless insults at Mu-Lan.

I told her to “stop following me.”

I even called her “creepy.”

Unlike Mu-Lan, who kept coming to see me, I showed off other young ladies, hugging their waists and shoulders, praising them as beautiful and cute, but I can’t even remember those girls now.

All I remember is Mu-Lan’s expressionless face.

Ah, that’s right. I don’t even know what Mu-Lan’s face looks like when she smiles.

She never spoke to me beyond greetings.

So, I have no memories of any conversations with her.

“Ah!! Mu-Lan! Mu-Lan!!”

I clutched my head and sat on the floor.

When I cried and begged to see Mu-Lan, I was told she had already left the kingdom, and I was plunged into despair again.

Even if I wanted to chase after her, the knights blocked me and wouldn’t let me out of the room.

Normally, I wouldn’t have lost to one or two knights, but I was weak and was easily overpowered.

My mother sobbed, and my father pitied me.

I was told that the throne would be given to my uncle, but I couldn’t even listen properly.

Where is Mu-Lan, I asked, but there was no answer.

“I’m sorry, Rude. ...That it came to this.”

Father quietly apologized, and Mother’s sobs echoed.

That’s right. Whose fault is it that it came to this?

It’s because Father didn’t stop me.

He should have stopped Mu-Lan.

My Mu-Lan. My ‘fated partner.’

As I repeated this in a delirium, Mother’s sobs seemed to grow louder.

The pure white leopard girl.

She is beautiful. More beautiful than anyone in this world.

Her piercing gaze is something I want to look at forever.

I want to see her again. Mu-Lan, can you reflect me in those eyes one more time?

I take back what I said about not wanting to see your face.

I take back what I said about not wanting you to look at me.

Show me your face, Mu-Lan.

I want to touch that shimmering pure white hair.

I haven’t even touched that silk-like hair yet.

Please, I beg you. Grant me the permission to touch it with these hands.

Forgive me for calling you an “ugly leopard girl.”

Forgive me for calling you a “pitiful woman.”

I will apologize, so please forgive me, Mu-Lan.

The guilt for what I did to you is now squeezing my chest.

It’s heavy and oppressive.

I even threw things at you.

Even if I didn’t hurt you, just imagining the possibility makes me shudder. I’m glad you weren’t hurt. That’s a relief. Really.

The harsh words and actions you pointed out also torment me.

All of it.

I shouldn’t have done any of it.

Ah, I was arrogant.

I must have been so cruel that you couldn’t stand it.

I’m sorry, so sorry.

It’s painful.

Even breathing is painful, my chest feels tight, and my throat stings.

Despite the unbearable pain in my chest.

I feel an empty void.

How am I supposed to accept the reality of not having you?

Is this the end for a dragon who has lost their ‘fated partner’?

Please, stop.

Take it back, Mu-Lan.

Don’t abandon me. Don’t leave me.

“Aaaahh!! Mu-Lan!! My Mu-Lan!!”

I can barely eat, and I spend the whole day lamenting and grieving.

I realize I’m getting weaker, but there’s nothing I can do.

“...Mu-Lan... I’m sorry...”

I continued to despair, knowing that my pleas for her would never reach her.

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The author stated that they wanted to depict a more broken mental state—

When I was in a depressed phase, I decided to output a broken mental state and thought of this trashy crown prince. However, I didn’t manage to do it in time, and I’m currently in a high-spirited mood.

Today in the morning, it was 4th place in the daily other-world [romance] ranking!

Thank you!

I’m very happy with the number of likes! I’m grateful and moved!

I want to finish it in the next chapter or the one after that.

It will be about Mu-Lan’s future.

Thank you for your support!

2024/02/04