Chapter 51

The moment I saw Altair's expression stiffen, I knew.

‘As expected, Altair…’

He's upset because I haven't properly played the role of the viscountess!

‘His brows are furrowed so deeply…’

I told him to rest comfortably, but how could I rest so easily and leave a guest behind? When was I planning to play the role of the viscountess? I promised to be a proper wife, but this is a failure. I could almost hear Altair's cold voice echoing in my head. Perhaps Altair didn't point out my shortcomings as the viscountess because he hoped I would realize my mistakes on my own.

‘Fortunately, I realized it in time…’

I sighed with relief and rekindled my determination. I was determined to work harder since I had realized it late and to properly play the role of the lady of the house.

‘Besides, I need to protect Altair from Prince Orca’s clutches.’

I don’t even have time to relax.

“Altair, don’t worry. I’ll do well.”

“What exactly… how do you plan to do well?”

Altair ran his hands over his face and let out a tired sigh. As his hands fell away from his face, his sharp eyes met mine.

“Don’t do anything. You really don’t have to do anything.”

Altair’s eyes and voice always carried a firm strength. For a moment, I felt overwhelmed and almost nodded, but the burning determination in my heart helped me keep my head high.

“I know I’m not good enough. I’ve never properly entertained a guest, let alone a prince, so I understand your concern. But I won’t tarnish the Eilsford name.”

“….”

Altair opened his lips as if he had a lot to say, but quickly closed them. Another long sigh escaped his lips.

“Still, no. You haven’t fully recovered yet.”

“I’m fine. Really. I even helped Leon organize his clinic today.”

“What? Why did you help? What are the servants doing?”

“Leon refused any help from the Eilsford people….”

“Then you’re not an Eilsford person?”

“I am an Eilsford person. But I’m from the capital….”

As I answered his relentless questions, my shoulders began to droop. I thought I had done my part, but Altair didn’t seem to think so. I felt my voice getting smaller, and Altair stopped his questioning and stared at my face. His gaze made my heart sink even more.

“….”

“….”

As an awkward silence fell between Altair and me, Pavel, who had been quietly observing our conversation, subtly intervened.

“Madam. Please follow Lord’s wishes. From what I can see, you don’t look well.”

‘That’s because Altair keeps pushing me…’

Thanks to a few days of rest, I felt very light and in good spirits when I woke up this morning. But now, it felt like all that was a lie, and my body and mind were sinking.

“…I know my condition well.”

I know I have many shortcomings, but I’m not so stupid that I don’t know my own condition. My head dropped.

“I said I can do it because I can. I know you don’t trust me, but I will do my part.”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you….”

“Then what is it?”

As I heard Altair’s voice trying to counter, something welled up inside me, and I lifted my head. I thought we had built trust over time. I might not be a reliable wife, but I thought I had shown that I wouldn’t be a burden.

“It’s really not that. I’m not doubting your abilities… I swear.”

Altair placed his hand on his chest and spoke calmly, but it wasn’t the answer I wanted.

“Even if you say you’re not doubting me, this is unfair. If there’s a reason you don’t want me to do it, you should tell me. Just telling me not to do it… is really unfair.”

This is just a repeat of what happened at the meeting. Isn’t a marriage a partnership? If one side only receives protection… it’s not a marriage.

‘So, Altair and I aren’t a proper couple, then.’

As I thought this, my eyes began to sting, and I noticed Altair’s eyes widen in surprise when our gazes met.

“Nadia.”

“I am the Viscountess of Eilsford. So, I will do my part.”

I closed my eyes tightly and declared this before turning around. It had been a long time since I spoke my mind so freely. I was surprised by myself, and the unfamiliarity of the situation made my heart race.

‘Altair might be angry because I’m acting on my own.’

But Altair also acted on his own, so I will too. I’m doing this to protect Altair as well.

*** As Nadia stomped away, Pavel shrugged.

“…It seems she has fully recovered?”

As he said this, he turned his head to see Altair staring at Nadia’s retreating figure with a dazed look. Pavel sighed softly and patted Altair’s shoulder to bring him back to reality.

“This time, Madam is right. If you just say no without explanation, how can she understand?”

“…I’m just worried about my wife.”

Altair offered a weak defense, but Pavel was already on Nadia’s side.

“You should change the way you show your concern. Madam is your wife, not a subordinate. We follow orders, but Madam is different. You can’t order family around.”

I don’t understand. Is there a difference between how you worry about a subordinate and how you worry about family? Altair frowned, not fully grasping the concept. He lost his family at a very young age and didn’t know how to worry about family in a familial way. He had always thought about how to protect his people and had done so successfully. But perhaps there’s something more needed in a family? Is concern alone not enough? Despite his usual stoic expression, Pavel, who had served him for a long time, could sense the confusion beneath.

‘It might be a bit presumptuous…’

Pavel decided to offer a small piece of advice.

“What about being honest with Madam? About Eilsford’s situation or your concerns?”

“I can handle it on my own. Why share the burden?”

“Because she’s family?”

Pavel tilted his head nonchalantly.

“I often share my burdens with Blan. Of course, he usually just ignores me… but that’s what family is like.”

Altair listened to Pavel’s words in silence. He had taken a wife to secure an heir and was determined to protect her. She was his. But, but….

“I know it’s not my place to say this, given that I encouraged you to take a wife for an heir. But Madam is your partner, isn’t she? A family member you’ll spend your life with.”

‘Family…’

It was a simple statement, but it didn’t feel real. After losing his parents in a tragic accident, ‘family’ was something that didn’t exist in Altair’s life. His marriage was a strategic decision, and he didn’t think he had gained a family. But family… his heart felt strangely uneasy. Family? My family was all burned away. They were consumed by fire.

“Lord?”

Pavel, noticing Altair’s worsening expression, asked worriedly.

“It’s fine.”

He raised his hand to stop Pavel from supporting him and started to walk. His unsteady gait made Pavel’s face wrinkle with worry.

‘Did I make a mistake…?’

But Pavel shook his head.

‘It’s a problem that needs to be overcome.’

Pavel knew that something in Altair’s inner world was off. He thought it was a part no one could touch, but he had noticed that someone had started to approach that part. The lady, Nadia, who became the Viscountess of Eilsford through a strategic marriage.

‘If Madam can properly align what is off in Lord…’

Pavel swallowed his hope and quickly followed Altair. *** After shouting at Altair and walking aimlessly, I found myself in the garden. The bedroom I shared with Altair, the study filled with books Altair loved, the dining room where we had meals together… I instinctively chose the garden, looking for a place without Altair’s presence.

‘At least this is my space.’

Altair, being a somewhat cold person, rarely visited the