Chapter 3

A little girl with her hair in two buns and wearing a pink dress stood at the entrance to Zhao Yan's bedroom. With her round face and big eyes, she looked incredibly cute, especially if she could close her mouth and stop her terrifying screams, which would make her even cuter.

"Stop!" Zhao Yan's ears hurt from her screams, and he roared, which finally made her stop. However, when the little girl saw the smoke around Zhao Yan and the glowing cigarette in his mouth, she immediately screamed again, "Fire!" and threw a basin of water at him.

"Whoa~" Zhao Yan felt a chill all over as the cold water drenched him from head to toe. Fortunately, it was already May, and although it had been raining, the temperature was not low. Otherwise, if this had happened in winter, Zhao Yan would have frozen to death.

"Little Bean Sprout, I was just smoking a cigarette. Why did you throw water at me?" Zhao Yan spat out the wet cigarette and shouted in anger. It seemed that when things were going badly, even drinking cold water could cause problems, and smoking a cigarette could result in being doused with cold water.

"I... I..." Little Bean Sprout, the young maid, was still confused. When she entered, she saw smoke coming from Zhao Yan's mouth and nose, which made her think she had encountered a ghost, so she screamed. Then, seeing the smoke in the room, she instinctively threw the water. Her little head was still spinning, and she could only look at Zhao Yan with wide, innocent eyes.

At that moment, two women rushed in. One of them, though young, was dressed as a married woman, with a clear and extraordinary appearance. This woman was Cao Ying, the first Northern Song Dynasty person Zhao Yan met after his穿越 (穿越 means "穿越" in Chinese, which can be translated as "穿越" in English, but in this context, it means "time travel" or "transmigration"), and she was also his nominal wife.

"Little Bean Sprout, are you okay? Did someone bully you?" Cao Ying and the other maid rushed in and immediately asked Little Bean Sprout with concern, while giving Zhao Yan a wary and disdainful look. Since the wedding night, Cao Ying had despised Zhao Yan immensely and would avoid appearing with him in public if possible.

"No... I'm fine!" Little Bean Sprout replied, still somewhat panicked. She was a maid who came with Cao Ying and had been responsible for taking care of Zhao Yan, who had been bedridden after being struck by lightning. She was the person Zhao Yan had interacted with the most, but the young girl, who was only eleven or twelve, seemed to be very wary of Zhao Yan. Apart from helping him with his daily needs, she hardly spoke to him.

"Hey, are you making a mistake? It was Little Bean Sprout who threw water on me. Why aren't you asking if I'm okay?" Zhao Yan said, clearly upset.

After his transmigration, Zhao Yan inherited some fragmented memories of the original Zhao Yan. These memories were few and incomplete, but they included what happened on the wedding night. This made him disdain the original Zhao Yan and feel some sympathy for Cao Ying. Due to his recent daze, he had not cared about Cao Ying's attitude, but now he felt he should let go of his grievances and integrate into his new life. Seeing Cao Ying not even ask if he was okay after being doused with water made him angry, as he was, after all, her husband.

Cao Ying only gave Zhao Yan a cold look and said, "Little Bean Sprout is a maid who came with me, but she is still young. Moreover, the Prince has been ordered by the Emperor and Empress to avoid women until he recovers. Please, Prince, respect yourself!"

Without listening to Zhao Yan's explanation, Cao Ying pulled Little Bean Sprout away. Zhao Yan was so angry he almost jumped up and cursed. Cao Ying had assumed he had done something to Little Bean Sprout, which was why she had thrown water on him. This was an insult to his character. Little Bean Sprout was only eleven or twelve, the same age as his students in the future. No matter how perverted he was, he would not touch such a young girl, especially since he was forbidden from approaching women by his nominal parents due to his health issues.

Thinking about his health, Zhao Yan suddenly became worried. In his previous life, he had read many transmigration novels, and the most common form of transmigration was being struck by lightning. Unfortunately, he was a victim of this, being struck by lightning in both his past and present lives, and even by a mysterious ball lightning.

Worse still, the ball lightning had circled the mansion before striking Zhao Yan, and many guests and servants had witnessed it. The next day, the news of the Guangyang Prince being struck by lightning on his wedding night became the biggest news in Kaifeng. Everyone talked about it, adding their own twists and exaggerations. The rumors about Zhao Yan being struck by lightning had spread far and wide, even reaching the Liao and Western Xia, making him a notorious figure in the three countries, though mostly in a negative light.

Zhao Yan had been a dissolute person, his body weakened by alcohol and women. That was why he had used aphrodisiacs on his wedding night. Being struck by the mysterious ball lightning not only transformed him into the Zhao Yan from the future but also caused some unknown damage to his body. He had been bedridden for days, partly due to the shock of transmigration and partly due to his weakened state.

What worried him more was that after several imperial physicians examined him, they concluded that his body was very weak and needed to avoid women and follow a strict diet to recover. They could not determine when he would fully recover and could only check his condition periodically and make adjustments.

Initially, Zhao Yan had not cared much about his health, but now he realized that if he really had erectile dysfunction or other issues, it would be a disaster. Thinking about this, he quickly checked his private parts. Fortunately, they seemed to be in good condition. He looked around to make sure no one was there, then touched himself, recalling some scenes from Japanese adult films, especially those featuring the "Yamei蝶" (a play on words, "Yamei蝶" can be translated as "Yamei Butterfly," but it is a pun on the Japanese word "Yamei" which means "ugly" or "disgusting").

"Great, it's working! I don't have to be a eunuch!" Zhao Yan sighed in relief, seeing his private parts react. He then changed out of his wet clothes into dry ones. He had his own maids to take care of him, but after being forbidden from women, his imperial parents had assigned Cao Ying to supervise him. As a result, Cao Ying had removed all the female servants from his quarters, leaving the inner mansion empty except for those who came with her. Little Bean Sprout was one of them, and she had been assigned to take care of Zhao Yan, but she had ended up dousing him with water.

Feeling better about his health, Zhao Yan's mood improved, and the frustration from being wronged dissipated. He sat down to continue organizing the items on the bed.

Apart from his personal belongings and a cigarette lighter, there were only a few things left, the most noticeable being two ears of corn and a sweet potato. Seeing these, Zhao Yan's mood turned gloomy again. If not for these items, he might have already returned to school to teach his students.

Originally, after picking up the microscope package in the county, Zhao Yan had planned to take the bus back to school. However, the bus broke down on the way, and with the sky getting dark and the school not far, he decided to take a shortcut. He had skipped lunch to catch the bus, and his stomach had been growling the whole time.

The shortcut was lined with cornfields and a few sweet potato patches. Feeling extremely hungry, Zhao Yan dug up a sweet potato to tide him over. However, he did not expect to see a sign at the edge of the field that read, "Steal sweet potatoes, get struck by lightning."

Stealing a sweet potato or a few cucumbers when hungry was not considered stealing, at least according to his students. He had often gone to the fields outside the school at night to pick corn or young peanuts for a late-night snack, and no one had ever complained. But he had not expected to encounter such a petty person who would curse him for taking a sweet potato.

Zhao Yan, being young and stubborn, had initially just wanted to grab a sweet potato to eat. Seeing the sign, his temper flared, and he went back to the field, picked two ears of corn, and put them in his bag for a snack. He wanted to see how this petty person would make lightning strike him.

In fact, Zhao Yan was also in the wrong. If someone put up a sign, it meant they did not want others to take their crops. This showed that the person was petty, but it was still their private property, and taking it without permission was illegal.

Zhao Yan, in a fit of anger, put the corn and sweet potato in his bag and walked back to the road. Just as he was about to take out a small knife from his keychain to peel the sweet potato, the field owner's curse came true. A bolt of blue lightning suddenly appeared in the clear sky and struck him, rendering him unconscious. When he opened his eyes again, he saw Cao Ying, his new wife, and found himself as the historical third son of Emperor Yingzong of Song, Zhao Yan.