V1C11

Parsed with an automated reader. The content accuracy is not guranteed.

Old Man Japan continues his explanation about the guild. “Additionally, there is one more reason to accept work from the guild. Since this is relevant for you, I thought I’d mention it. Wherever you go, you’ll find fresh-faced adventurers. And these young people, same as you, usually have no home to call their own. . . .”

According to Old Man Japan, any parent would do their best to stop their child from becoming an adventurer—even by physical force, if necessary. So those that do become adventurers do so by fleeing not just their families but their villages entirely, oftentimes simply to escape the toils of farm labor.

I think I see where this is going. “And they have to rent a room from the guild! You mentioned that earlier.”

“Yes, that’s right. You’re really paying attention, Marron. If you complete a job for the guild, you can stay for free that night. Not that that’s much of a prize. The rooms are large and barren, and adventurers are crammed into every available bit of floor space—and the guild doesn’t deign to provide as much as a blanket. But, I suppose, it could be beneficial, if you could save up money to buy your own home that way. . . .”

Apparently, though, not only will no adventurer make that common-sense recommendation to another, there are tons of them who’ll go out of their way to drag you down. Some guys will take new adventurers out drinking and teach them to like the taste of it. They seem to be in cahoots with the guild to trap newbies, and there are, as a result, a bunch of adventurers who waste all of their money on drink and can’t free themselves from the guild’s lodgings.

If a young adventurer gets used to the work and begins to make some real coin, then they’ll invite him gambling; after that, they’ll get him a woman. In this way, the guild manages to suck up any rewards the adventurers earn.

Okay, so I know what ‘gambling’ is, but what exactly does it mean to ‘get someone a woman’?

“The Guild Hall, then, can be thought of as a very compact red-light district. You want to get drunk? They’ve got that. You want to gamble? They’ve got that. You want a wench? They’ve got plenty of those too.

“They use vices to make it so that you can never escape from their clutches. They take ignorant young people and mold them into adventurers who can’t leave—like ants scrambling fruitlessly in an ant-lion’s trap.”

By the end of Old Man Japan’s explanation, Osshan’s face is pale. That makes sense—he had seemed like he was going to run straight to work at the guild just a second ago.

“Bleh, that sucks! That’s not at all like the Adventurers Guilds I’m familiar with. They might as well just call themselves the Yakuza!” he shouts.

*****************

“While we’re discussing the guild, let me discuss one more salient point. There is a method of treant hunting called ‘rabbit driving.’”

Treants drop Skill Fruits like Improved Foraging and Improved Mineral Gathering. They’re the weakest plant-type monster that drops actually useful skills. You’ll only get Trash Skill Fruits from anything weaker.

You might be wondering what kind of monster a treant is. They use their spear-like branches to take out their prey and suck the nutrients out of them via their roots. These spear-like branches whip around freely, and they have far too many to even count. In short, they’re very, very dangerous.

So, what people do, apparently, is find a rabbit and drive it toward the treant. This is ‘rabbit driving.’ The treant is defenseless while it feasts on the rabbit, so they attack once it starts.

“However, to even harry the rabbit, you need at least ten adventurers. With that many adventurers, each one’s share—even if they manage to retrieve a Skill Fruit—becomes quite small. So, what you can do then instead is buy a pig to stand in for the rabbit. But the pig is quite expensive, and again the profits and your share shrink.” Old Man Japan leans forward in his chair. “And so now something different has recently become popular. It goes something like this. Find an inexperienced adventurer, like yourself”—he fixes Osshan with his one eye —“invite him to the treant hunt, and, once you’re near the treant, shove the poor boy into its waiting branches. If you use a young adventurer in place of a pig, you can hunt a treant with only a few adventurers at zero additional cost.

“Hopefully, you understand why when I say you should never accept an invitation to go Treant hunting. No matter what.”

Old Man Japan is always telling me and the other little kids not to go anywhere with strangers, and he uses the same tone of voice to warn Osshan. He does seem like the kind to be easily tricked.

“What the hell? You’re telling me that veteran adventurers use newbies as bait? I can’t believe you guys let something so ridiculous go on. I mean, come on, that’s murder. They should be arrested!”

“By who? You won’t find police in this world, and even the laws themselves mean very little. We talked a moment ago about that adventurer’s poor, young wife. Do you know how that ended up? With people saying, ‘Wow, what a poor, young thing.’

I apologize for my severity, but you’ll quickly find yourself in deep shit if you behave here like you would in Japan. I thought it best to communicate that as clearly and quickly as possible.”

Old Man Japan further explains that, no matter how ridiculous it may seem, the rules are set by the ruler—whether they be the king or just a local lord. If they say that up is down and down is up, then it’s time to get used to walking on your head.

That’s a weird thing to have to explain. Are things different in Osshan’s land?

As I ponder that, Old Man Japan calls out to me. “Marron, tell me, have you ever found yourself in danger during your life here? Have you been able to generally enjoy yourself?”

Well, I was in some danger when that wyvern attacked earlier today, but we can ignore that. He’s asking whether any bad people have ever caused me real trouble. And the answer is, “No, not at all. This is nice place to live, and I’ve never run into any jerks. And I have fun every day!”

Old Man Japan smiles and turns to Osshan. “Look at Marron. She’s still so small, only eight years old, and she has nobody to look after her. Even so she says that she enjoys her life. As long as you’re willing to try to live normally, you’ll find living in this world quite easy.

“I repeat myself, but, whatever you do, don’t even think about trying to become strong and show off. If you simply get up every day and gather slimes, you’ll be able to live a long and happy life.”

Dad told me the same thing. If you want to have a peaceful life, the important thing is not to stand out.

Osshan groans. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life catching slimes? This sucks so much. I want to go back to Japan!”

Could you tone it down a bit, buddy? You don’t need to yell. We’re literally right here.