Chapter 12 of 100
Chapter 12
10 min read2,593 words
### Chapter 12: On the Day of Enrollment - Behind the Banquet Hall (4)
* * *
#8
Ruby can't gossip or speak ill of others.
She usually just listens quietly when her classmates gather around her desk to talk about how someone's boyfriend is a jerk, or how some girl in the next class is always showing off, or how they don't like someone.
While empathy is important for building group cohesion and trust among members, Ruby can never participate in gossip.
Instead, if the talk gets too harsh, she awkwardly laughs and defends the subject of the gossip, saying things like, "They probably didn't mean it that way..." even though the person has nothing to do with her.
She knows the feeling of disliking someone.
Ruby is an individual with her own personality, and she can feel resentment towards someone who has wronged her.
However, she rarely lets even that resentment show.
Because if she does, the other person might get hurt.
This is also why she doesn't participate in gossip. If their conversation spreads and reaches the subject's ears, they might be deeply hurt.
Ruby's nature (??) is like that.
She has an unshakable purity, but because of this, she is extremely vulnerable to the fragility of human emotions.
She doesn't like being hurt.
She dislikes hurting others even more.
Therefore, no matter how much she dislikes someone, Ruby can't say a single bad word about them.
Even when she's fuming with anger, "You bastard" is the harshest curse she can muster.
"…You. You were a junior to Elio, right?"
Therefore.
Ruby dislikes Miu.
She dislikes her, but she can't show it.
She sits weakly on the bench, brushing off her knees, and looks up at Miu, who is staring at her coldly, with tear-streaked cheeks.
"I heard the story. About the incredible swordsmanship prodigy among the new students… and that you graduated early when I was graduating."
"…"
"…I know you and Elio were close. I sometimes hear about Elio… and I often thought it was nice that you were close to him in my place…"
Miu didn't want to talk to Ruby. But she was listening. She quietly suppressed her shallow anger and whispered.
…Why are you thinking about thanking him on his behalf? After you rejected him. You acted like it was out of your control, like it was a difficult situation, and you let things happen naturally, pushing him away…
On the other hand, Ruby gently combed her light pink hair, which had fallen softly on her white thighs.
"…I don't blame you for not telling me where Elio was. You probably couldn't find him either. Elio probably didn't want us to find him…"
"…"
When she came to find me while I was preparing to leave the dormitory.
I remember her shadowed face, gasping for breath, asking about Elio-senpai.
That was the first and last conversation between Ruby and Miu.
"But today, I was so happy to finally meet Elio again. I was so happy I almost cried… but I still haven't properly apologized to Elio. I want to be forgiven if I can be."
It was the same for Miu.
But it seemed Elio-senpai had no intention of forgiving them.
It's not because the fire in his heart has gone out.
It's just too late.
By now, the meaning of forgiveness has been lost. The changed Elio-senpai seems to have no expectations from them.
That was the most… sad thing.
Miu asks Ruby.
"If Elio-senpai doesn't want to forgive you?"
"…Even so, I have to apologize. Elio was my most precious friend… and I hurt him the most."
It was the same for Miu. She had caused a lot of pain to the person she loved the most. She had said and done things that were selfish to the point of being repulsive, making mistakes that could never be undone.
The more she realized this, the more she gradually understood that she had no right to hate Ruby.
But she couldn't help it.
After seeing the person she loved fall apart so completely, she couldn't help but blame all the causes that led to it.
Miu spoke softly.
"…Why did you reject Elio in the first place?"
"…? What do you mean, ah…"
Ruby realized what Miu was asking.
She looked away, dazed, and answered.
"…Elio told you that, huh? Yeah, I guess it's natural…"
Miu felt a bit of amusement. Elio had told her many stories about Ruby.
She tapped the end of her scabbard and spoke.
"What about Elio didn't you like? You said you were very happy when you were young. You said being with Elio was the most fun. …But why, if Elio was so lacking, did you say you couldn't develop a romantic relationship with him even though you were happy just being with him?"
"…"
At that moment.
Ruby felt a lump in her chest.
Already in a somber mood, it was even more upsetting to have her painful memories brought up, and to have Miu, who was just a close friend of Elio, pry into the deep details of her and Elio's relationship.
If it were the usual Ruby, she would have ended it there.
Ruby, with her gentle nature, found it very difficult to take a sharp attitude.
But why.
Why did she feel like saying something unpleasant to this junior?
"…What are you to Elio?"
"Huh?"
Ruby's hand, which had been combing her hair, stopped.
It was strange. One side of her chest felt strangely hot.
It was an unfamiliar emotion.
But Ruby didn't want to hide her feelings deep inside, as she usually did.
Somehow… she felt like she needed to say what she wanted to Miu to relieve this discomfort.
Swish.
Ruby, who had been bowing her head like a sinner, slowly lifted her head.
She looked at Miu with a slightly irritated face, a look that only Elio would notice, and asked sharply.
"Are you just a close junior? As far as I know, you said you were very close to Elio… but were you closer to him than I was? No, right? Are we even close enough to ask about such private matters?"
"…"
Miu was slightly surprised.
…Is she angry? This older sister?
According to Elio, she only knew how to cry and couldn't make others cry.
Miu, who had stalked Ruby for a few days out of curiosity, had to agree with that.
So, objectively, she thought of her as a kind and pretty older sister.
She needed to revise that evaluation.
…Ah, right.
That's it.
Miu drew a thin smile in her heart.
This older sister doesn't know.
That she and Elio-senpai were in a relationship.
"Ex-girlfriend."
"…What?"
"Ex-girlfriend. I dated Elio."
The next moment.
Miu saw the sharp light in Ruby's eyes gradually fade.
"…"
Being an ex-girlfriend is not a good thing for Miu…
But for some reason, it felt satisfying right now.
"Ex… girlfriend…?"
Ruby averted her gaze from Miu. It took her more than thirty seconds to process Miu's words. The emerald pond in Ruby's eyes, which had started to waver, rapidly dried up.
"But… Elio never… told me that…"
"What? Why should Elio tell you?"
"…"
"Should he go to the childhood friend who rejected him and say, 'I have a girlfriend now'? Then, after hearing 'Congratulations,' it's all over? No, right. Elio would probably feel even more miserable. If he says he has a girlfriend and you just say 'Congratulations' without any emotion…"
"…No emotion, I…?"
Ruby was confused.
If that were the case, she wouldn't be feeling this headache from Miu's shocking statement. It felt like the world had shaken a couple of times. The strange heat that had risen in her heart a moment ago quickly cooled.
Instead, a new flame ignited.
"…I know. I have no right. Because I rejected Elio. …I'm still here, but just because I rejected him, he fell in love with someone else… and dated you… I can't say anything about that…"
"If you know—"
"I see. Elio… had a girlfriend… Yes, you and Elio… were in a relationship… He must have been… very happy, right? You and Elio are not bad people…"
Miu looked down at Ruby with cold eyes.
She was happy.
…Maybe she would have continued to be happy if it weren't for you.
Ruby smiled weakly and muttered.
"…Ahaha, I'm really selfish… I knew Elio and you were close, but… when you say you dated, it feels like you know a lot about Elio that I don't… It's not a good feeling…"
"…"
"…When did it start?"
Miu answered without hesitation.
"December 23rd, the year before last."
"…"
Ruby realized that Miu was telling the truth. At the same time, she could clearly feel how much Miu cherished Elio.
December 23rd.
What was she doing that day?
It was hard to remember because it was from the winter of the year before last, but something…
Ah.
…It was then.
Ruby's heart became even more troubled.
"Is that enough to ask? …I think if someone has watched Elio for a long time, they can't help but like him, not just as a friend, but as a romantic interest."
"…"
Miu loved everything about Elio.
She truly loved him, so she loved everything about him.
Miu's type of male protagonist in the romance novels she usually reads is completely opposite to Elio.
Still, Miu loved Elio passionately.
More than anyone in the world.
"…"
Ruby was feeling a mix of emotions.
Her chest felt heavy, she wanted to cry, she felt a deep longing, and a sharp sense of guilt.
A lump in her throat, a feeling she couldn't express, filled her mouth, and she had to swallow it back.
"…Do you… like… no, love Elio?"
"Still do. Even though I have no right."
"…I see."
Suddenly, Ruby felt envious of Miu.
She could see that Miu loved Elio. Love is an intangible feeling that shouldn't be visible, but she could gradually sense that Miu truly loved Elio from her words and actions.
Miu had something that Ruby lacked.
Not love for Elio, but the ability to love someone.
"…I still don't really understand."
Ruby spoke slowly, as if confessing her sins under a sacred statue.
"I always thought love was an extension of happiness. But when I thought about being in a romantic relationship with someone I like, it was just… scary."
Ruby was born and raised in the countryside. That's why she could remain pure, and that's why she was full of fear of the unknown.
"When I rejected Elio in the first year, it was for a similar reason. Elio was like a precious family member to me… When he said he saw me as a woman, I was a bit shocked. So… I was scared. Of becoming closer to Elio. Of our relationship changing suddenly…"
She was afraid of hurting others.
She was afraid of being hurt.
The deeper the relationship between people, the deeper the wounds they inflict on each other.
It's different when a stranger insults you compared to when someone you trust does.
The future where that would happen was scary.
But now she knows.
That kind of fear was really nothing.
"But now… I'm more afraid of losing Elio."
She still remembers.
After a week of absence.
Elio suddenly dropped out of the academy just before graduation, emptied his room, and disappeared somewhere.
When they were both in the academy, she could feel Elio's presence from a distance.
But after he disappeared from her sight, and after… she realized the whole truth.
Ruby was enveloped in a maddening sense of anxiety and couldn't bring herself to die.
Was he still alive?
What would she say when she found him?
What kind of apology would be enough?
Nothing was certain…
It was a really tough time.
But now.
On the very day she reunited with Elio in the Frontier.
Ruby could finally smile comfortably, just like in the past.
She clenched and unclenched her slightly bony hand.
Ruby thought quietly.
"…"
Three years have passed since Elio's first confession.
During that time, Ruby met many people, had many experiences, and gradually matured mentally. She became capable of deeper reflection.
When she was with male seniors or male classmates at the academy, Ruby sometimes had a negative impression of love.
From Ruby's perspective.
Their stirring desires.
Their one-sided love… was just scary.
There was no comfort or happiness in the love she knew, only vague fear and discomfort.
…Ruby liked everyone, but that was all.
No matter how many people loved her, for some reason, Ruby couldn't reciprocate.
The only person who could be a comfortable haven for Ruby, aside from her blood relatives, was one person.
But she was the one who had deeply hurt that person.
The one who comforted that person's wounds was someone else. They might have become even closer than she and that person.
Moreover, Ruby almost lost that person.
Forever.
It was all her fault.
And that person had risked their life for her.
…With all these circumstances combined, Ruby couldn't understand the complexity of her feelings.
She was really happy and relieved to meet Elio again, but she was also incredibly sad.
Thinking that he had become closer to someone else while they were apart made her heart ache a little.
Why was that?
…Thinking about it.
Elio always had her by his side.
Except for her, Elio was always alone.
He had no romantic partner.
"…"
Ruby realized this fact blankly.
When she was at the Lorsen Academy.
She had a senior she was close to.
One day, she heard that this senior had a previous girlfriend.
It didn't affect her at all.
But now.
When she heard that Elio had a partner named Miu.
…Huh.
Her heart throbbed.
"…Ah?"
Just as Ruby was trying to recognize a vague emotion in her heart, Miu spoke in a surprised voice.
"…You rejected Elio for just that? I'll never understand such a ridiculous reason."
"…"
"Elio worked really hard after you rejected him. To change. I watched it all from the side, from before he knew me. He changed a lot. …So, what do you think of the new Elio? Can you love him now?"
"…"
"Of course, it's too late to try to love Elio now. Elio, already, neither of us. No one has the right to love him. What can you do now—"
That's when it happened.
"Hmm, I can definitely tell one thing."
"…!"
"…!"
Suddenly, Elena appeared between Ruby and Miu, folding her arms and nodding with a smirk.
"First, I can tell that this Elio guy is a real sinner. Youth, youth. Naive love games are all well and good… but if you don't go now, the banquet will be over. I heard this counts for evaluation. Do you want to lose attendance points on your first day of enrollment? Huh?"
"E-Elena-senpai… why are you here?"
Miu, who took a step back, was met with a fierce glare from Elena.
"What? Why are you here? Can't I be at my alma mater? And I didn't say I wouldn't be outside the banquet hall, just that I wouldn't be inside. Hurry up and go in!"
"Y-Yes!"
"E-Elena-senpai… my clothes are torn…!"
While saying that, Elena almost dragged Ruby and Miu, who were sitting on the bench, and led them away, recalling the dormitory rule that allows entry to the opposite gender's dormitory with consent, and smiled mysteriously.