Chapter 30

Xu Fengnian was just about to go to the mute sword enthusiast to learn the so-called sword qi when he heard a pig-like wailing, filled with the mournful cries of someone who had lost their parents. Xu Fengnian smiled and turned around, seeing a large ball of flesh rolling and crawling over. He quickly used the sheath of the Xiudong saber to brace against the momentum of the 600-pound ball of flesh. The only one who dared to act so shamelessly before the Young Master was Chu Lushan, this corpulent oddity.

Seeing the dark-skinned Xu Fengnian, the fat man, nicknamed "Luball," with tears and snot, struggled to squat halfway down before the Young Master. His white, plump hands held the Xiudong saber sheath, sobbing uncontrollably.

Xu Fengnian loved to see Luball's exaggerated antics; each time he saw them, he was delighted. As for their authenticity, as long as the Xu banner stood, they were as real as they could be.

Xu Fengnian drew the saber sheath and patted the face of the mighty Qian Niu Longwu General, "Get up and speak. A third-rank general kneeling before me, I've never heard of you kneeling to your parents. I've heard that you often take out your frustrations on them. What kind of decorum is that? By the way, Luball, have you finished what Father Xu entrusted you with?"

Chu Lushan, without bothering to wipe off the buckets of sweat from his climb up Wudang, struggled to stand up, his body of fat trembling. It was hard to imagine how his concubines and maids could endure the pressure of 600 pounds of flesh. The round, fat ball smiled obsequiously, "It's mostly done. The rest is being watched, so there won't be any leaks. Just waiting for Your Highness to inspect. My parents are two shameless old people. The only good thing they did was giving birth to me. Why should I kneel to them? But Your Highness, wise and valiant, you alone possess the talent of the world. Today, you've achieved great skill with the saber, making you both a literary and martial genius. I would be willing to kneel to death for Your Highness. Your Highness, this mountain is no place for humans. I boldly request that Your Highness return to the mansion. Hey, on this trip, I found a pair of beautiful twin lotuses in Jiangnan, just in their youth, but as plump as mature women. Your Highness, they are ready to be picked!"

Xu Fengnian's face darkened, "Twin lotuses?"

Not knowing how he had angered the Young Master, Chu Lushan's mind raced. He suddenly remembered the old servant with the missing front tooth. In the Sword Nine, the second sword was called "twin lotuses." This fat man quickly slapped himself twice, with great force, his face turning red like braised meat, regretting, "I deserve to die!"

Xu Fengnian put his arm around Chu Lushan's shoulder and laughed, "Look, our brotherly bond has grown distant, hasn't it? I was just scaring you, and you took it seriously? That's when you should have slapped yourself."

Luball nodded vigorously and slapped himself again, the sound resounding loudly, using all the strength he had from last night. Chu Lushan was notorious in Liang for his brutality, to the point where his crimes were too numerous to list. One of his crimes was that whenever he heard of a beautiful woman giving birth, he would kidnap the child and feed on its milk. If the milk was good, the woman would be rewarded and sent away. If not, she would be mutilated.

This wolf, however, had always been a dog in the Liang王府. But this dog had once followed the Grand Marshal in battles, carrying Xu Xiang and shielding him from eleven sword strikes. So Xu Xiang promised that his adopted son, Chu Lushan, could commit eleven capital offenses without punishment.

The other adopted sons, each with their own factions, all despised Chu Lushan. For example, Yuan Zuozong never looked at this fat man, and the Butcher Chen Zhileo openly declared that he would light a sky lantern with Luball's corpse in the future.

Xu Fengnian took Chu Lushan to the Xiangxiang Pool, where it was instantly cool. Watching the round ball carefully squat down and splash some water on his face, Xu Fengnian smiled and asked, "You didn't come up the mountain just to wail in front of me, did you?"

Chu Lushan looked up and smiled, "There are some interesting stories recently. I was afraid Your Highness might be bored on the mountain, so I wanted to tell you to relieve your fatigue."

Xu Fengnian, interested, said, "Luball, you're thoughtful. Tell me quickly."

Chu Lushan sat down on a rock, his face beaming, "The first is that the Wu family's sword tomb has produced a young genius swordsman named Wu Liuding. At twenty, he left the sword tomb and challenged famous swordsmen across the land. He hasn't lost yet and is about to reach the Yuewang Sword Pool. There will soon be a good show. This Wu's sword skills are excellent. He has traveled alone from north to south, and though he hasn't faced any first-rank experts, several of the skilled opponents he has defeated are well-known for decades. But Luball thinks, no matter how good his sword is, compared to Your Highness's saber, it's just a needle."

Xu Fengnian smiled, not commenting, and gestured for Luball to continue.

Luball wiped the water droplets from his face, which had been warmed by his body, and continued, "The next two are both related to the Second Princess. Two weeks ago, the Second Princess was a proctor at the Shangyin Academy, grading a five-character poem by a former Xishu scholar. She rated it as 'unbearable to look at.' The scholar was不服气 and asked who in the world could meet her standards. Your Highness, do you know what the Second Princess said? Her comments almost offended all the literary giants in the empire! She criticized Song Qi's poetry as weak and filled with licentious and frivolous content. She criticized Grand Scholar Yuan Jiang, Shen Haitang, and Zhang Jue as lacking in substance, seeking fame, and not having the talent or interest to be called great poets. She criticized the Shangyin Academy's poetry master, Yan Jidao, as writing short poems that were purely natural, showing no personal effort. Even her teacher, Su Huang, was not spared, being criticized for focusing on sentiment and lacking in substance, like a poor beauty, though beautiful, lacking the grace of wealth. In the end, the scholar was stunned and asked about the current first poet, Li Fugan. The Second Princess still criticized him as only readable, not singable. As for those below Li Fugan, they were not even worth reading."

Chu Lushan, out of breath but excited, continued. Strangely, the Grand Marshal's two daughters, Xu Zhihu, deeply hated Luball, wishing to beat him to death. On the contrary, the highly respected Xu Weixiong had no particular aversion to this fat man and never questioned her brother Xu Fengnian's association with Chu Lushan.

Xu Fengnian laughed, "This is great. All the scholars in the world will be furious."

Luball chuckled, "Your Highness is wise. Once these comments were out of the academy, the world was filled with curses. On this trip, I conveniently cut off the fingers of a man who dared to write an article criticizing the Second Princess for being arrogant and overestimating herself."

Xu Fengnian, intentionally or unintentionally, skipped over this part and asked, "The last one?"

Chu Lushan's face turned fierce, "A young man from somewhere went to the Shangyin Academy to challenge the Second Princess to a game of chess, saying he wanted to recreate the famous Ten Games of Danghu."

Xu Fengnian was surprised, "Did my second sister agree?"

Chu Lushan, with a murderous look, sighed, "She agreed. They played ten games over ten days, five wins and five losses."

Xu Fengnian smiled, "I guess it was still the twelve-line board, not the nineteen-line one my sister created?"

Chu Lushan nodded.

Xu Fengnian understood, "That means, no matter how good his chess skills are, he's not yet qualified to play on the nineteen-line board with my sister."

The Buddha-like Chu Lushan's murderous intent subsided, and he immediately became smug.

Xu Fengnian laughed, "After your outburst, I remember something. My second sister doesn't like me practicing the saber. I need to flatter her when I go down the mountain."

Luball's eyes narrowed, seemingly very happy.

Xu Fengnian stood up, "I need to practice the saber. When you go down the mountain, pick two cucumbers from the vegetable garden. You, who love meat, should occasionally eat some vegetables to live longer."

Chu Lushan quickly stood up, his face full of gratitude.

Xu Fengnian took off his clothes, placed the Xiudong saber on the shore, and dove into the deep pool with a fish-like leap.

Chu Lushan picked two cucumbers, one in each hand, no more, no less. After walking for about an hour, he met the guards and slowly descended the mountain. He had climbed up through the main path from the Xuanwu Temple, but chose the southern path for the descent, a route often taken by pilgrims. The mountains were like bamboo shoots, and the river like a ribbon. Chu Lushan was silent, even eating the cucumber down to the stem. The guard commander, a brutal and muscular general, had a good relationship with this adopted son of the Grand Marshal. He half-jokingly said, "General, you have such refined tastes, even interested in cucumbers." Without a word, Chu Lushan slapped him, with great force, extremely viciously, knocking out several of the general's teeth. The man swallowed the blood and teeth, kneeling on the ground, trembling in fear.

Luball, who laughed even when the Young Master teased or slapped him, was expressionless, walking down the mountain path without looking at the terrified commander. He only looked back at the towering Lotus Peak and softly said, "I really don't belong on the mountain."

{Piaotian Literature}