Chapter 25

An Ning didn’t know why he was bothered by what Qin Weihang said. When he thought of Qin Weihang’s contemptuous eyes, he felt terribly uncomfortable. It was to the point where he couldn’t ponder over whether Qin Weihang’s words were reasonable or not, nor why he said that.

Originally, he planned to wait until the weekend lesson to return the clothes, but now he didn’t want to wait even a day, so he called Qian Fei. Qian Fei heard that he was going to bring clothes over right now, so she said: “Don’t be in such a hurry. You can return it this weekend.”

An Ning insisted on returning it now: “Qian Fei-jie, are you at home now?”

“I’m at the company right now.”

“Will you give me the address? I’ll come to the company to give it back to you.”

Qian Fei was surprised and asked: “What’s wrong, why are you so anxious?”

“It’s nothing.” An Ning did not tell the truth, “I’m outside right now,” he got up and walked to the balcony and said, “just wanted to return it while I’m at it, that’s all.”

“… Okay then, you can leave it at the front desk when you arrive at the company.”

Qian Fei sent him the address. An Ning quickly packed up his things and went downstairs. He rushed to Qian Fei’s company building, then dropped off the bag at the front desk and left. It took more than an hour to go back and forth. On the subway back, people lowered their heads and scrolled on their phones to pass the time. An Ning dazedly looked at the glass window, staring at the dark tunnel and the reflections of the exhausted people. He listened to the mechanical station announcements as it sounded each time, but it wasn’t entering his head. Thus, he didn’t even know which station he was at now, nor did he know what to do to squeeze Qin Weihang’s words out of his mind.

It was already evening when he returned to school. He went to the cafeteria to have dinner, turned on the computer in his room, and ordered a cheap phone online. When he was at the last step of the purchase, which was to scan the code, he was stumped at once.

Too impulsive. He should have bought it first before returning the phone…

He took out the old phone again. He prayed that he would be able to turn on the phone while charging it, but luck seemed to have suddenly left him on this day—the phone seemed to be completely dead. After he couldn’t turn on the phone, he looked out the window in a daze. There was a public phone downstairs in the dormitory. He can also buy a phone card for dozens of dollars to make a call home and ask his mother for money. But he originally planned to call on his mother’s birthday a week later, so if he calls now for help, then the present and the surprise would all be in vain.

It was better to just work harder. While thinking that, he retracted his gaze, opened the ZFB* website again, and tried tenaciously for an hour before he finally recovered his username and password. He logged in to the website and completed the payment.

[*TN: The pinyin for Alipay(Zhīfùbǎo), an online payment platform.]

After finishing all this, it was almost 9 p.m. An Ning leaned on the desk, feeling relieved yet more tiring than running 1,500 meters.

He chose a phone that was 600 yuan($94). After placing the order, he calculated the math in his head. He earned more than two thousand($313) a month with his salaries, but this was all going towards his living expenses and tuition, and he won’t be given any extra money from home. The prices in A City were twice that of his hometown. Originally, because the second-hand computer in his room was pretty slow, he planned to save money to buy another one. Now, he can only postpone it. As for his glasses, he should be able to handle the degree of this pair for a while. It was just that the lens were a bit scratched, but that can only be changed later.

After a long night, he just remembered that he forgot to fetch hot water. While the water room was still not closed, he hurried downstairs with the water bottle. The auntie in the water room was a little surprised to see him and asked him why he came to fetch water so late today.

The hot water gurgled into the water bottle, and there was a mist of water on his lens. Everything in front of him was blurred, like a thick mist suddenly appearing in the night. He usually fetched water at dinner time, and it wouldn’t be dark yet. Even if the lens was foggy, he can still see the path under his feet. When asked by the auntie why he came so late today, he smiled and said that something delayed him. Seriously speaking, it seemed that nothing major has happened. He had always been living an orderly, peaceful, and harmonious life, but today was completely disrupted. Since seeing the deep-water rock climbing poster, nothing had gone right.

Downstairs in the dormitory, he met Liang Shenghan and Xiao Pang, both who were coming back from the Internet café. Liang Shenghan was surprised to see him over here. “How rare, there would be a day when you’re not in the library.”

Xiao Pang asked him: “An Ning-ge, did you read the WeChat I sent you?”

An Ning hesitated, “Oh, I lost my phone…”

Liang Shenghan was surprised, “Lost it?!”

“No way.” Xiao Pang sighed, “You really have a hard life. After only a few days of use, you lost this expensive phone!”

An Ning nodded with a guilty conscience and said: “Yeah.”

Fortunately, online delivery services were fast; the phone arrived the next day. An Ning downloaded all the apps, logged in to WeChat, and saw Xiao Pang’s WeChat message. Qian Fei sent one on the same day. Qian Fei asked him in WeChat: What’s the matter with the phone?

An Ning hurriedly sent back: “I’m sorry, Qian Fei-jie. I thought about it, I’m still a work-study student, so it’s a bit inappropriate to use such an expensive phone.”

Qian Fei directly called and asked him: “Did someone at school say something?”

“No, it’s just that I don’t think it’s appropriate…”

“Why do you think it’s inappropriate? What’s so inappropriate about it?” Qian Fei’s tone sounded like a corporate chairman for the first time—tough and makes people unable to refute. “This is just a second-hand phone; you don’t need to spend a penny to use it, and I don’t have to throw it away for no reason. Is it because it sells for 5,000($782) outside, so you would rather spend extra money to buy a new phone rather than using this one? Aren’t you getting your priorities backwards?”

An Ning was unable to say anything after being asked questions after questions by Qian Fei.

Qian Fei said: “I don’t care what others said about you, so you also shouldn’t mind it. It’s the person who said that to you who was wrong, he didn’t respect you. You’re not at fault at all.”

An Ning lay on the bed that night, tossing and turning. He was conflicted—Qian Fei’s words were not wrong at all, but why was he still unable to ignore Qin Weihang’s words? Even when these two voices clash in his head, Qin Weihang always wins in the end.

How can he blame Qin Weihang for being wrong? Blame Qin Weihang for not respecting him?

It was he himself that took the opinion of this not-so-familiar roommate too seriously, and it seemed difficult to make things right.

No one would have thought that Qin Weihang would come to a major course the next day. The morning of the third and fourth lesson of the History of the Chinese Legal System class, Qin Weihang appeared in the lecture hall. Everyone, including Xiao Pang and Liang Shenghan, were surprised. When Qin Weihang entered the classroom, the back row of the room was already full. The more he went forward, the more empty it was. He walked and sat down in an empty seat in the fifth row of the central aisle.

An Ning originally had his head lowered to sort out his notes, but suddenly a shadow in front of him blocked him. He raised his head subconsciously, and saw Qin Weihang wearing a short denim jacket and a black turtleneck sweater. He was instantly dumbfounded.

When Qin Weihang leaned down to put down the seat, he did not raise his head. After sitting down, he still habitually leaned back, leaning quite heavily. An Ning felt that the row of seats were trembling because of this. He looked at Qin Weihang’s shoulder, which was within reach, and brought an indescribable sense of oppression. It made him a bit at a loss as to what to do.

He guessed that maybe Qin Weihang didn’t see him when he chose the seat. After all, he was writing something with his head down. Later, Qin Weihang might have seen, but he couldn’t change to another seat. So when he put down the seat, he didn’t look up, pretending not to see him.

It was so awkward, it was really too awkward…

Qin Weihang actually regretted it a bit after sitting down. He didn’t know why he chose this seat, it felt too weird, like he was demonstrating something. When he pulled himself together, he felt really childish. It was already too late to get up and change seats. Even just sitting in the back row was fine, why did he sit in front of him instead? And in a position where his weakness could be exposed so clearly? The other party could look at him at any time, but he wouldn’t know, and he couldn’t turn back to confirm. It was such a failure.

The professor who was talking about the history of the Chinese legal system was an old professor of the law department. He was a short old man wearing a pair of old-fashioned glasses that hadn’t been changed for many years, but his thinking was very active. He goes on Weibo every day and kept up with the trends. The witty remarks at the beginning of class often made the class laugh. His class was scheduled in the third and fourth lessons, so the attendance rate had always been quite high. As for those who were often absent, it was probably only a person like Qin Weihang that would do that.

Halfway through the class, the old professor talked about a case of collective sexual assault. The victim was a boy, and the perpetrator was a group of boys, but it did not reach the point where an x relationship* occurred. It was more like campus bullying, and the victim was willing to accept this kind of bullying. The old professor said that he wanted to hear everyone’s opinion, and looked around the classroom: “Is there anybody who wants to take the initiative to say something?” After listening to the case, everyone was still in shock. No one raised their hands, so the old professor said, “Then I will call a random classmate,” but put aside the roster, “I’m too lazy to go through the roster, so the school grass that has always been absent will answer.”

[*TN: I assume this means that it hasn’t gotten to the point where they had sex.]

Everyone in the lecture hall looked at Qin Weihang. An Ning also looked at Qin Weihang in the front row. Qin Weihang’s shoulders remained motionless, but his head was slightly lowered. The high black collar wrapped his slightly drooping neck, and his hand with the diving watch moved forward on the desk. He flipped through the textbook for a while, not wanting to respond.

The old professor laughed and said to everyone: “He doesn’t want to admit it, why doesn’t he want to admit it? If I was the school grass, I will just stand up confidently.”

Qin Weihang still wouldn’t admit it, but An Ning could tell from the slow fluctuation of his shoulders that followed his breathing; he was really not that calm, but was only trying to stay calm—like a monk sitting upright and knocking on a wooden fish, after a long time, he will be able to find inner peace.

The old professor asked them all: “What’s his name? Qin what?”

Several voices in the classroom said “Qin Weihang”. The old professor looked in Qin Weihang’s direction again and raised his hand: “Then, classmate Qin Weihang, you tell me. I also want to hear what wise opinion you have after missing my classes this whole time.”

An Ning saw Qin Weihang’s hands that were on the edge of the table drop down. Then he dragged his seat before finally standing up.

His body’s shadow covered An Ning’s body. An Ning raised his head to look at Qin Weihang’s back. He heard his voice ringing above his head, with a monk-like calmness that was unbecoming of his age, he said: “I don’t know.”

The old professor raised his eyebrows: “Even if you don’t know, you should have an approach at least. What is your approach?”

The audience was in an uproar.

Qin Weihang thought for a while and said: “Chemical castration.” Still very calm.

The old professor said: “Your attitude is a kind of hatred as if seeing an enemy, but it’s useless to merely hate. We live in a society under the rule of the law. I actually want to ask, why do you study law?”

This question really hit the nail on the head. Not only was An Ning curious, but many people were also curious.

The old professor looked at the school grass and said jokingly: “From what I can tell, you probably prefer being Batman.”

The classroom laughed.

Qin Weihang was standing there, and An Ning was probably the only one that can feel the sound of his breathing slowing down. He said: “To make a living.”

Qin Weihang’s voice was still very calm. The good-tempered old professor, on such a rare occasion, had a bad expression. He finally waved his hand: “Okay, you can sit down.” Then he suddenly called on An Ning, “The classmate sitting behind the school grass, stand up and tell me your opinion.”

An Ning thought this was really the worst script; Qin Weihang had just sat down, but now he had to stand up. Yet, it was a rare moment for him to be at a lost for words.

The old professor looked at him and said: “Do you also study law for the sake of making a living?”

An Ning came back to his senses a bit. He answered cautiously throughout the entire speech, saying: “I think”, “I feel”, “probably”, “maybe”, and “I’m not too sure”, for fear of showing off.

Qin Weihang was sitting in front of him, but he couldn’t see Qin Weihang’s expression, only the black and shiny hair on Qin Weihang’s head. When he said “I think,” Qin Weihang, who was originally leaning on the back of the chair, sat up and opened his phone. The phone was held by Qin Weihang from underneath, between the desk drawer and his thigh. Just from lowering his head a bit, An Ning could see the advertisement on the screen. It was an advertisement of Sui Qingchi* endorsing Fubao mineral water. Qin Weihang was holding the phone with one hand, his thumb casually swiped down a few times, and the pictures and text scrolled at a dazzling speed.

[*TN: The ML from the author’s previous work, 轻错.]

It was just a few sentences, but An Ning felt as if he had said a whole lesson, because the rhythm of Qin Weihang’s finger swiping seemed impatient, and he didn’t seem to be knocking his wooden fish anymore. He changed from a monk to an ordinary 19-year-old boy. The mood swings were too obvious.

An Ning always felt that even if Qin Weihang was merely listening to his voice, his entire body could emit cold air. Under such tremendous pressure, he quickly sat down after answering. In such a speech that had absolutely no logic in it whatsoever, the old professor still gave a positive answer. Then intentionally or unintentionally, he used Qin Weihang as a negative example and said a whole mouthful of words. An Ning saw that the back of Qin Weihang’s head showed indifference. Moreover, his shoulders were no longer fluctuating slowly, and his whole body seemed to be frozen.