Chapter 85

85

Hessen's hand, gripping the whiskey bottle, was visibly tensed. He, who had been frozen in place, clenched his teeth.

Despite the warning signs of danger, Owen's mockery continued.

“You’ve liked Lily since she was just a maid’s daughter. So you used to secretly watch her from afar every day. Treating that dirty little girl as if she were a precious gem, you couldn’t even approach her, just watching her from a distance. It was quite amusing.”

Finally, Hessen exploded. He sprang from his seat and threw the whiskey bottle at Owen.

But Owen merely moved his head to dodge it with a light laugh. The whiskey bottle shattered against the wall, its contents and glass shards flying everywhere, but Owen, enveloped in the power of the spirits, remained untouched.

Hessen ground his teeth and muttered.

“You... you bastard...”

“There’s nothing you can’t say to your brother, Hessen Everett.”

“You’re the one who should act like a brother. You keep rubbing me the wrong way!”

“It’s fun.”

Owen, who had retrieved a new bottle of whiskey from the cabinet, sat down and laughed. Hessen trembled violently, as if the inability to immediately strangle Owen’s neck was a lifelong regret.

Clack, clack. Pouring whiskey into a glass, Owen extended it to Hessen.

“Sit down, Hessen. I’ll tell you why Lily hates you.”

“She only hates me? She hates you too.”

Owen ignored Hessen’s words and continued.

“You can’t control your emotions. Especially when you’re angry, you can’t see anything.”

“...”

“So you used to beat and torment Lily every day. It’s no wonder she hates you.”

“...If you say it one more time, she hates you too.”

“I know.”

Owen, with a smirk, brought the whiskey glass to his lips. His eyes, filled with leisure and weariness, showed no sign of wavering.

“It doesn’t matter if she hates me.”

“...”

“Lily is mine anyway.”

A cold silence followed. After a moment, Hessen muttered in a low voice.

“...You’re a lunatic...”

Owen, far from being angry, laughed as if he was enjoying it. As he held the transparent amber whiskey up to the light, Owen’s eyes deepened, as if gazing into the distance.

“Lily will inevitably return to my side. No matter where she goes, no matter whose hands she falls into for a while, she will ultimately be buried at my feet.”

“...”

“If Theodore Valentine gets in the way...”

“...”

“I’ll have to kill him.”

* * *

Derrick, the Valentine family mage, came to find me a little after noon.

I was puzzled about why he had come to see me, waiting for him to speak. After a while, he finally opened his mouth while sipping his tea.

“...I have a request, my lady.”

“To me?”

“...It’s something only you can do. Please...”

He clenched his fists and continued.

“Please talk some sense into your lord.”

* * *

‘That’s a forbidden magic.’

‘If you make a mistake... your lord might be in grave danger.’

‘I am truly sorry, my lady... but if your lord passes away, the Valentine family will collapse without a chance to resist.’

‘So please, my lady, talk some sense into your lord. I beg you.’

After hearing Derrick’s story, I immediately went to find Theodore. However, he wasn’t in his office.

Calvin, Theodore’s assistant, who happened to be bringing documents and saw me, informed me of his whereabouts.

“His Excellency is probably in the lounge. He often uses it to rest. This way.”

The lounge was a space directly connected to the office, but the entrance was hidden behind a bookshelf.

Calvin skillfully moved the bookshelf to open the door, and I carefully entered.

The lounge was sparsely furnished, creating a rather cold atmosphere compared to other rooms.

I realized this was my first time here. In the past, Theodore wouldn’t have allowed me to enter.

...Thinking about the ‘past’ made my heart ache again.

Since I found out what his misunderstanding was, I’ve felt as if I’ve returned to the past, feeling tormented and heartbroken.

I couldn’t understand him, and no matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t make sense of it. How could he misunderstand someone over just a letter?

This made it even harder for me to forgive him. The compassion I felt for him as a victim of the Everett family and the hatred inside me were intertwined in a sticky mess.

These emotions might never be resolved. They would continue to haunt me, lying dormant most of the time but occasionally rising up without warning.

‘Even Theodore...’

After Calvin left, I was alone in the lounge, reflecting on my thoughts.

Click—

The door on one side of the lounge opened, and Theodore appeared from the other side.

“...”

Our eyes met, and he looked flustered.

He was only wearing a robe, and water dripped from his black hair.

He had just finished bathing.

...But something seemed off about his bath.

For one, no steam was coming from the bathroom, and a faint chill emanated from him.

As if he had just emerged from cold seawater.

Upon closer inspection, his lips were also blue.

“...What were you doing?”

As I scanned him, Theodore quickly blinked and averted his gaze, like a teenager caught in a compromising situation.

I felt a sudden tightness in my chest and sighed, then asked.

“Don’t tell me you just doused yourself in cold water?”

“...”

He lowered his head, seemingly confirming it.

I was already in a foul mood from Derrick’s revelations, and this made me even more exasperated. I wanted to push him away and yell at him. What were you thinking...

I opened my mouth and then abruptly said,

“I heard everything from Derrick.”

Startled, Theodore immediately reacted. He lifted his head and looked at me with a shocked expression. I met his gaze steadily and continued.

“You... are you crazy? Why are you doing this? Did I ask you to do this?”

“...That’s...”

“Do you think I’d be grateful for this? What on earth...!”

My emotions flared, and I panted with anger, clenching my fists.

...I had a feeling something was off.

My physical condition was abnormally good. It felt like my body wasn’t even mine, recovering so quickly and overflowing with vitality...

It didn’t make sense, no matter how much I thought about it.

And just now, I heard the reason on my way here.

‘...A magic artifact that shares life force?’

‘Yes, with that, your lord... is infusing his life force into you. He goes to you secretly while you sleep...’

‘...’

I was speechless.

And I was angry.

“This is just your self-satisfaction.”

“...”

“I don’t feel the slightest bit grateful. Giving me your life force, which is slowly draining you...”

How can someone be so reckless and irresponsible?

You might die, and as the head of a family, you’re essentially committing slow suicide...

Moreover, I don’t want to feel indebted to you in this way.

“If you think you can gain my forgiveness by sacrificing your life, stop it.”

I felt my eyes well up, though I didn’t know why. I couldn’t grasp why I felt so choked up.

“...I’m not doing this to gain your forgiveness.”

Theodore spoke softly. His voice was calm and gentle, but there was a hint of sadness in it.

“I just... want to give you my life.”

“...”

“To save you, I would do anything.”

“...”

“I will give my life to you as many times as it takes.”

...After hearing his words, the first thought that came to my mind was, ‘Why?’

I don’t understand why you’re doing this. Is it because of guilt? Because you’re sorry? But that doesn’t explain it. Who would give their life force to someone else just because they’re sorry?

So I have to ask. What is your reason for doing this? What do you want from me...

If you really gave me your life force purely to save me... I can’t easily believe that.

“...Why are you doing this?”

“...”

“Is it because you feel sorry? Because you’re guilty? Because you want me to forgive you?”

“...”

“I don’t understand. What you’re doing...”

I shook my head, feeling confused. A sense of foreboding made my heart tremble. At this moment, I had a premonition that the biggest shock would hit me like a tidal wave.

I wanted to hear the truth from his lips, but part of me wanted to turn away.

A long silence ensued. After a while, Theodore spoke.

“To some extent, yes.”

“...”

“But that’s not all.”

His voice sounded calm and indifferent, but when he lifted his head to look at me, his eyes held an unbearable heat.

A look that was both unfamiliar and yet, somehow, familiar...

“...After nearly losing you so many times, I can no longer deny it.”

“...”

“Pretending and rationalizing, like in the past, is no longer possible.”

The temperature of his blue eyes rose. The heat coming from him felt like it could burn me.

...It was hard to believe, so I took a step back and shook my head.

His confession, his gaze, everything felt like a lie.

“...No, don’t say it.”

I think I understand.

Maybe I’ve known for a long time.

Both of us.

But it was an invisible arrow, leaving no visible trace.

It only pierced our hearts, leaving a wound that would never heal.

Because we were both in our own miseries, we could never feel the thrill or sweetness.

The heartbeat, the tingling, everything we felt for the first time only hurt us.

Yet, I tried to hold on, while you tried to let go.

What you ultimately turned away from...

And what I, in the end, gave up and left as a wound.

“...Now.”

“Still, this is my true feeling.”

“It’s too late. Too late.”

As I turned to leave the lounge, Theodore grabbed me.

His sudden closeness was cold. I couldn’t tell if my body was shaking from the chill or from the fear of finally giving a name to the unnamed emotion.

“You...”

He named the emotion too late.

Only now, after I had resigned myself, did he finally do so today.

“...I love you.”

The words made my consciousness waver. It felt like I was sinking into a deep abyss.

I closed my eyes and covered my ears, wanting to deny this reality.

But the hot tears streaming down my cheeks, the sharp pain in my heart, were all too vivid.

A broken reality, a heart that could never grow.

Even though spring would never come to frozen ground.

“...I will now fully accept this feeling.”

Selfishly, you confessed your love.

Knowing that even this confession would hurt me.

I cried and shook my head.

It felt like my heart was being torn apart.

“No, I can’t... I can’t accept it now.”

“...”

“...You’re too bad. You’re a terrible person...”

He held me tightly, not letting go. For a long time, I couldn’t escape from his embrace.

As if he could give up his life, but not his selfishness.