Chapter 2

EP 1 – Cause of Death

Prisoner, Moon In-sub.

Verdict, Death Sentence.

Method of Execution, Lymphoma.

I read the hospital diagnosis like this.

Being diagnosed with lymphoma at the age of 22 felt more like a death sentence than a diagnosis.

It was as if some enormous, transcendent being had pointed at me and said, "Your fate is sealed."

This wasn't the first time I had felt this way.

Like when I realized that the kind woman who had taken such good care of me in my childhood was not my mother but a teacher at the orphanage.

Or when I found out that my parents, whom I thought were dead, had actually divorced and neither of them had claimed custody of me.

Or when I heard from the parents of the woman I loved that "You are not a match for our family."

And so on.

This world often throws unbearable trials at people like me, who are so weak.

"Life is..."

With these thoughts, I returned to the LH public rental housing with the hospital diagnosis in hand.

One good thing about growing up in an orphanage is that it makes you more likely to get approved for youth public rental housing.

The bad thing is that when you come home at 22 with a lymphoma diagnosis, there's no one to hug you.

"......I'm back."

The house was as quiet and dark as always.

I pressed the switch.

The house lit up, but it remained quiet.

I couldn't shake the feeling that the well-lit house was still dark. Was it because it was night? Because it was winter? Because I had cancer? I didn't know.

To break the silence, I muttered to myself.

"...Ah. Life. Life."

As usual, to save on heating costs, I put a blanket over my shoulders instead of turning on the boiler.

And as usual, I sat down in front of a manuscript to write out my pain.

It's an old habit of mine. Whenever the world troubles me, I calmly write down my thoughts.

Then, the sadness leaves my heart and settles into the manuscript as refined language.

That's how I've overcome my sorrows.

But today, the words just won't come.

Why?

The answer soon became clear.

It seems the sorrow in my heart has piled up so thickly that it can no longer be expressed in words.

As I realized this, tears suddenly began to fall.

Drip. Drip.

Watching the tears fall onto the manuscript, I thought,

What sin did I commit to deserve this...?

* * *

"Is this how you start a novel?"

"Why? What's wrong with it?"

"It doesn't match the current trends at all."

Baek Seol, a new employee in the Baekhak Entertainment Publishing Management TF team, put down the manuscript and harshly criticized it.

Perhaps because she was the eldest granddaughter of the second son of the group chairman, she spoke a bit roughly for a new employee.

"Who's going to read a novel that starts by digging a hole from the beginning? Sniff... My situation is so pitiful. This novel is just another Osamu Dazai knockoff."

On the other hand, Team Leader Im Yang-wook calmly picked up the discarded manuscript.

He wiped his smooth scalp with a handkerchief and smiled sardonically.

"Well... I like this novel."

"I can tell without even looking. It's about someone who, despite having cancer, reflects on their existence and past and faces death bravely... Not bad, but it's a common theme."

"No. He commits suicide."

"Excuse me?"

"But just before he commits suicide, he thinks that it's not because of the cancer, but because of the bad people who discriminated against him for being an orphan."

"Um... Well..."

"He chooses death instead of fighting the cancer because he has lost the will to live, and he lost the will to live because of the people who tormented him."

"......"

"So he goes out with a kitchen knife to seek revenge on a few enemies, but it happens to be Christmas Eve, and the neighborhood preachers are singing carols."

"......And then?"

"He listens to the carols, and for some reason, it seems wrong, so he quietly commits suicide. That's the ending of the novel."

"......"

Baek Seol remained silent for a long time.

Why did he die? Why didn't he kill anyone? More importantly, is it okay for a poor orphan to commit suicide when they get cancer at a young age? No, no, is there ever a reason for someone to commit suicide? Does death have a reason?

Suddenly, Baek Seol, as if in a trance, checked the title of the novel on the front page of the manuscript.

Cause of Death.

The reason for death.

"Damn..."

At this point, an ordinary person might have picked up the novel again, but she was a professional editor.

So Baek Seol stood up, put on her coat, and prepared to leave with her briefcase.

Team Leader Im Yang-wook chuckled.

"Where are you going, Baek Seol?"

"To meet the author and sign a contract!"

"Don't go. I already signed the contract."

"Why didn't you tell me that?!"

"He's a primary school student."

"What is?"

"The author."