Chapter 38

Draft

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The ground is shaking.

Your body is shaken gently, and your ears are full of clang clang sounds. When you opened your eyes with difficulty, you saw brown iron.

Light shines through the window, and you blink dully, lifting the coat that's over you. It's not the ground that's shaking, you're inside a rickety car and the wheels are running over the gravel, you bump along with it. A cool breeze blows in from an unknown crevice, making your drowsy mind slightly awake.

For a moment you don't know what time it is or where you are, like when you woke up from that hospital so many years ago. You slowly sit up and look out the window, the wasteland is endless.

"Are you awake?" Lemuel's voice comes from the front seat, full of joy.

You finally remember the scene before the darkness, and the void accompanied by pain seemed to be left behind in just a few seconds. You're confused, not only because of your current situation, but also because of the surprise in Lemuel's voice: didn't he knock you out? Before you can ask this question, Lemuel begins taking to himself.

"Thank goodness, it's been four days," He says, "Otherwise I wouldn't have known if I got something wrong with feeding you sleeping pills and nutritional supplements all the time... You might as well check it yourself? Some water and food are under the seat, eat some apples first, then we can go down and make a fire."

Four days?!

You almost suspect that you heard wrong, but you look out the window and estimate that it may be a day or two from the town, the sickly lands aren't a familiar sight for you. You aren't wearing a priest's vestment, but a large coat wrapped in a sweater. This is the one you bought for Lemuel. It's quite warm, slightly large, and half of your palm is wrapped in the sleeve. You roll up your cuff and see several holes on your arm.

By now, it's become very obvious: Lemuel knocked you out that night and transported you into a small wreck of dubious origin. In the four days that you lost consciousness, the car went at full speed every day, taking you farther from the Holy See. When Lemuel was talking to you, he was still stepping on the gas pedal and didn't stop.

You couldn't say anything for a while, literally, you're too stunned.

You couldn't digest what happened, Lemuel told you to get out, Lemuel said he loved you, Lemuel knocked you unconscious and kidnapped you through thousands of miles away. How on earth did Lemuel get the car, the sleeping pills, the nutritional supplements and syringes? How did he hiajck you from town, escaping the Holy See's army, passing the tests of the humans, all the way to the Great Plains? Your previous blind trust is actually true, you had absolutely no idea how Lemuel accomplished this, and yet he did.

Lemuel doesn't look back, he grabs the steering wheel with a hand and turns the car radio with the other. The horn makes a loud noise, and the radio of the broken car isn't much better. Lemuel reached out and tapped it a few times, flipping the buttons, and it spat out broken words.

"...The passing of His Majesty the Pope..."

You jump up and hit the roof with a loud bang. You fall back into your seat and your coat slips off your lap.

Lemuel doesn't say anything, he found the channel and turned the volume to the maximum. The radio broadcasted reports about the impact of His Majesty's death, the words of a certain politician, how the Holy See's spokesman responded, how the believers were saddened, about the cult organization, and what the future would look like...... The most important thing of this to you is that His Majesty the Pope is dead.

"This morning," Lemuel says.

Your brain goes blank.

You sit in the back seat of the car, bewildered and lost. His Majesty the Pope has died, that weak old man, His Majesty who couldn't afford to lose, such an important man, dying just like that. Ever since you've known the fate of the elder brother Ahaziah, you've realized the fate of the Holy Sons, and after seeing the compass, you guessed the reason of why His Majesty the Pope couldn't lose. He's the only remaining light on the lighthouse, you're the oil that adds onto it. You thought you'd never see the day when the light goes out, you were wrong.

You were told of your destiny early on, and you've prepared not too long ago. Who would have thought of such an ending? The firewood is still there, yet the bonfire has been extinguished. The upheaval occurred while you were in a coma, as the last Son slept through the momentous moment that shook the world, not only utterly uninvolved, but ignorant of it. It was as if the climax of a piece had come to an abrupt end. The predetermined road collapses, and the path ahead is covered with fog.

Like the day you lost the Holy Cross, you felt an empty terror. You frantically look around, looking for a revelation, even though you don't know what you're looking for. The lazy sunlight falls on you through the dirty window, and you look out the window, the fields are vast, the birds are flying in the distance, the foggy sky and the horizon feel vaguely connected, the sky hasn't fallen yet.

Lemuel stops the car.

He pulls over to the side of the road, turning off the radio, and turning around. "Are you all right?" Lemuel asks, staring at you with concern.

You sit in the back seat of the car with Lemuel driving in the front, and you wake up to the first time you've looked at him. Lemuel's eyes are bloodshot, but he seems to be in good spirits. He's wearing a furry hat with corners that look like Halloween decorations. He's also wearing a heavy coat, bloated and clumsy, hiding his strong frame and making him look like an ordinary well traveled driver. Lemuel knows how to disguise himself and is much more experienced than you.

He said that he'll stop for dinner in two hours, and now he stops just to listen to you. Lemuel is waiting, he's listening, and that makes you suddenly want to say something.

"I've seen him," You say.

"Who?" He asks.

"His Holiness," You answer, licking your dry lips.

Lemuel bends down to pick up the water bottle, he shakes it, making sure it wasn't frozen, and hands it to you for a sip. You unscrew the lid, take a sip, and shiver from the cold.

"I told you to take a sip." Lemuel smiles helplessly, "We'll stop and boil some water later, we don't have to let it freeze... What's the matter?"

He looks even more nervous because you're staring straight at him. You stare, trying to catch the flash of light in your head. It flashes when Lemuel speaks and disappears before you catch it, like a deer that flees if spotted. Your search was fruitless, so you had to give up thinking for the time being and continue to talk about the nonsense you want to tell Lemuel.

"He looks very old," You say. "When I went to war, he sent me away. I left and he didn't."

Lemuel doesn't speak, just listening.

"I survived," You say, "He didn't."

"It's good that the old man died and the young man survived," Lemuel says. "We survived."

Yes, you survived.

It was as if a door had slammed open, your heart suddenly opens up.

You want revelation, you see an endless field. You want to hear the oracle, and Lemuel turns around and speaks to you. God has never shown his face, but he's given you guidance. The Holy See hoarsely draws countless lines, and the merciful one in heaven is silent.

You seek guidance and flow down the stream with Enoch Wilson's holy card. You plead for redemption, nothing happens, and you learn to take a step forward, make your own choices, and take responsibility for yourself. You try to go back to make a break, go back to face your destiny, and all the turbulent waves happenes in the distance, and before you know it, the dust has settled. When the old Son left, heaven and earth didn't fall, the kingdom of heaven accepted him; yet the young Son stayed, and the Father in heaven doesn't stop you or Lemuel.

Fate doesn't need you to follow, fate is the current. God is silent, that is the answer.

"Are you really alright?" Lemuel asks cautiously.

You realize that you're smiling, and when you realized that, your smile widens, you even laugh out loud like you've never laughed in your life. Lemuel looks at you with a flustered face, as if worried that something was wrong from you being overstimulated. You shake your head at him and tell him you're fine.

"This is the eastern part of the Great Plains, right?" You laugh, "Is the Grand Canyon you're talking about right here?"

"It should be." Lemuel says hesitantly, "I haven't been there... Are you really fine? God, you wouldn't kill yourself when I'm not paying attention, would you?"

"No, suicide is a sin," You answer.

"Okay, now I believe you haven't lost it." Lemuel roll his eyes and looks relaxed, but only a little bit. He's silent for a while, then says, "That's it?"

"What?" You say.

"Aren't you angry?" He hesitates. "I don't want to complain, but I thought you'd be angrier, after all, I..."

Lemuel gestures to his neck.

You rub the back of your neck, after four days, there's no pain there, just a little stiffness— anyone who's spent a few days in the backseat of this crappy car would be stiff. There's quite a few empty bottles on the floor in the back seat, and Lemuel had hang the bottles for you the past days. You don't have dehydration or other serious problems.

"It's alright now," You say. "Just eat something and use the prayer."

Lemuel nods and hesitates. After a moment he sighs, and says in a defeated voice, "Where's the Pope?"

"I feel sorry about it," You say.

Lemuel waits for a while before realizing that you're finished.

"Just, sad?" He confirms.

"I'm sorry," You correct. "He was a kind old man."

"No... you looked so determined to go back and die a few days ago! Did something that I don't know?"

"It's God's will," You say.

Lemuel's eyes widen, as if annoyed, as if relieved, and at the same time found it utterly hilarious. "God is omnipotent and omnipresent," You explain to him. "If he didn't stop it, its acquiescence."

You left the Holy See and met Lemuel. Lemuel lived through cataclysms, he met you. You met, fell in love, and worked together to successfully escape. It required a lot of luck, but miracles happen all the time. God has forgiven you.

Lemuel glares at you for a while, before a funny look prevailes, causing him to shake his head and laugh out loud. He grabs the back of the chair and laughs non-stop, bursting into tears. It was as if a heavy burden has been lifted. "You're sick," He says firmly. "Yeah, I don't understand you."

"Yet you love me," You say.

"Yes." Lemuel agrees cheerfully, leaning over to kiss you, "Who told us to love each other to death."

Then, you set off again.

Lemuel changed the channel, and the radio played vulgar songs one after another, singing about hometown, highway, hotels, and female lovers. Lemuel responds with a whistle, his sharp claws beating on the steering wheel. You sit in the back seat of the car and watch his back and the uneven ground outside the window. There's no official roads in the Great Plains, and the dirt roads are rutted with many ruts—it doesn't matter if there's no predetermined path, go west, through the Grand Canyon, north or south.

You'll stop for a bite later, and after that you'll climb into the front seat and sit next to Lemuel. Lemuel will teach you how to drive, you can take turns driving, this old but durable car will take you to unknown places.

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PastTimer: Last chapter and two more extras oncoming!