Chapter 96

96

I exhaled slowly. There wasn't much time left.

"Why did you come to pick me up, Sharent Clown?"

If he hadn't come to find me when I was sent to the orphanage, we might have just parted ways there.

Why did he waste his time and effort to come looking for me?

I still couldn't understand Sharent Clown.

I didn't ask because it was more comfortable for me to rationalize things without knowing.

I even put a chain on myself to avoid having any small hopes.

"I was worried you might die, not knowing anything. I thought I would regret it if I left you like that. I don't do things I would regret."

That's such an arrogant reason.

"Do you hate me, Sheryna?"

Sharent Clown asked monotonously in response to my question.

It might have been the most curious question for him, and for me, it was a question I didn't want to answer easily.

The game wasn't over yet.

I had to answer, and it was the answer I least wanted to admit to myself and even more so to him.

"......"

"No."

I shook my head.

"I don't hate you."

Unfortunately, or perhaps despairingly, I revealed my innermost thoughts to the person I disliked and found most repulsive.

A door appeared in the center of the garden.

It seemed the game was over. This time, there was only one exit. It must be the last one.

"Let's go, Sukbu."

I turned my body, pretending not to say anything.

Sharent Clown didn't move from his spot.

"You don't hate me?"

After a long pause, he asked, sounding as if he couldn't believe what he heard.

Why aren't you leaving when you should? Why?

Even as I glared at him with a frown, Sharent Clown didn't move.

"Yeah, it's true. If I put it differently, I could say I like you."

I repeated the exact words he had said before.

Sharent Clown's stiff lips relaxed. His rigid expression softened instantly.

"Damn."

He burst into a silly laugh.

Sharent Clown approached me and held me with one arm. My view suddenly rose.

He seemed to be in a good mood.

"You're not very honest, are you?"

"......I'm better than Sukbu."

"True. Let's say we're both not very honest."

Sharent Clown walked steadily toward the exit while holding me.

Walking alone wasn't bad, but since my leg hurt, being carried wasn't a bad choice either.

"I definitely don't like you, you stupid, stubborn, and selfish half-person......"

This is really not about any affection.

Cancel everything I said before!

I hate you too! I really hate you! Sharent Clown, you stupid, idiotic, sea cucumber, half-assed, and fat cat!

Ugh, you look like a failed lion!

"Right now, I don't really hate you either."

"......"

"Put differently, I could say I like you."

I shut my mouth quickly at Sharent Clown's words, carefully removing the curses I had in my mind.

"So you can be stupid and an idiot. You can be a stubborn troublemaker. Even if you're not helpful, you're still a Clown."

Sharent Clown said as he walked down the long corridor.

"I promise you. You will be a Clown until the moment you die."

One side of my chest felt as if it had been struck by lightning.

I couldn't react to this strange emotion I had never felt before in my entire life.

If there had been a mirror in front of me, I would have seen how foolish I looked.

"I acknowledge you, Sheryna Clown. You are a proper Clown. From now on, the words you speak will have the authority to move the Clown family."

Did Sharent Clown encounter something wrong in that maze?

He seems to have developed some mental issues.

Otherwise, he wouldn't have said such things. A man who only cared about his family.

"Your future honor will elevate the status of the Clowns, and your mistakes will be embraced under the name of the Clowns. But you don't need to grow up quickly. Cry and throw tantrums as much as you want."

"......"

"Those who lack a childhood wither and dry up quickly."

His indifferent yet sensitive voice made my face contort.

I once conducted an experiment.

I grew two flowers for potion development. One was planted in a pot and placed in a well-ventilated spot, and I gave it water, sunlight, and fertilizer appropriately.

The other was planted outside in a similar environment but was given a growth accelerator instead of fertilizer.

At first, the one with the growth accelerator grew faster.

However, after a few months, the one given fertilizer grew larger and stronger.

The one with the growth accelerator looked strong on the surface but had thin stems and thin leaves, and it swayed easily with the slightest touch. It withered soon after.

But the one grown with fertilizer lived much longer. It lived long enough to spread its seeds and slowly wither, becoming fertilizer again.

Looking at the withered and dried flower, I wondered what I had thought.

I probably thought it resembled me.

By then, I had realized that my dark magic was about to consume me.

It was the price I paid for trying to become strong quickly.

I never blamed or resented it.

It was the path I chose, so who could I blame or resent?

Yet, I couldn't understand why Sharent Clown's words were so unsettling.

I lowered my head to hide my blurry vision.

The end of the long corridor was near.

I was carried out by him.

The stuffy space was left behind, and the cool air filled my nostrils.

It was the Colosseum.

"Wow!!"

Cheers echoed from all around.

I didn't have the energy to look up, so I lay limply in his arms. I wasn't sure.

What more did I need to become an adult?

"Clown Duke, you came out quite quickly for such a difficult challenge. Unfortunately, you were second."

Turning to the side, I saw Duke Deshel and his daughter standing there, smiling. Their excited faces suggested they had enjoyed it.

'Damn rabbit.'

I felt I would start disliking all rabbits from now on.

Even if it's discrimination, there's a limit. Even if it's adjusted to my level, there's no need to bring up such unpleasant feelings.

"Sukbu."

"Why."

"Write 'I am number one.'"

"It doesn't matter. Considering your brother was second from last, you did well."

His indifferent words made me open my eyes wide.

Kai Shan, the crybaby, seemed to have failed a lot, despite putting in a lot of effort recently.

"And I was second."

Sharent Clown said in a rather small voice, as if he didn't want to say it.

If I had heard that Kai Shan was last instead of second from last, I would have been less surprised.

It was hard to believe that the prideful Sharent Clown was second.

"Vallian was first. Due to the overlapping timing, I went with Father, and Vallian went with Mother."

"Really?"

At my words, Sharent Clown frowned and put me down.

What, this ice-cold man seemed to be quite human when he was young.

'I thought Vallian was just a troublemaker, but he did well.'

The trial itself wasn't difficult, but it was challenging for a child to solve or attempt.

There were various ways to solve it, of course.

That day, I didn't come in first, but I received a special prize for passing the difficult test.

Immediately after, I was seated in the Colosseum's luxurious waiting room.

The Emperor had called Sharent Clown and Deshar Clown, so I had to stay there.

The waiting room was as luxurious as a noble's room, and the spacious area was filled with soft carpets, beds, and snacks.

"I'll be back in a moment, so don't move from here."

"Okay."

"Kai Shan, play with Sheryna. Make sure she doesn't go anywhere."

"Yes, Father."

Perhaps my answer was unsatisfactory, so Sharent Clown put Kai Shan in the room and even placed two royal knights in front of him before leaving calmly.

He closed all the windows and doors tightly. What's with this lack of trust?

No matter what, I wouldn't go anywhere.

I grumbled and lay down on the sofa.

Kai Shan subtly approached me and slipped his leg under my head.

Hmm, he seemed to want to give me a lap pillow, looking at me carefully.

"Kai Shan."

"Y-Yes, Sheryna?"

"Can you get me a small cookie?"

"Sure, just a moment!"

He got up to get it himself, even though he could have called a maid.

Thanks to this, my neck, which was awkwardly raised by the lap pillow, was pressed into the sofa. Was he inconsiderate or just clueless?

Sleepiness crept over me.

Why am I so tired?

The breeze and sunlight seeping through the open window felt good.

Just as my eyelids were about to close, a sense of déjà vu made me open my eyes wide.

'Where is the wind coming from?'

Clearly, when Sharent Clown left, the doors and windows were tightly closed, making the room feel stuffy.