Chapter 41

Xu Mo felt both ashamed and embarrassed, wishing he could bash his head and die. He no longer cared about the apple, quickly turned his head, and walked forward briskly.

Right behind him, the little girl's innocent voice calling him 'mom' sounded again, as if she was whispering to her mother.

Xu Mo only hoped to get out of the sight of the young woman and the little girl as soon as possible. He had no time to listen to what they were saying, and he kept walking towards the wooden house in the garden. Once inside, he quickly closed the door.

Leaning against the door, he still felt his ears burning and his heart racing. He thought to himself, "My action of reaching into the trash can must have been seen by them. When they passed by the trash can, they didn't need to look deliberately; just a casual glance would have been enough to guess what I was doing. And after seeing it, they would certainly take me for a beggar."

Although he had indeed fallen to the level of a beggar and found it hard to survive without begging, he hadn't taken the first step yet. His last psychological barrier hadn't collapsed, and the last bit of his sense of shame still supported his self-respect, making him unwilling to let others know about his predicament.

The more he fell, the more he cared about others' opinions of him. He leaned against the door for a moment, desperately wanting to know if the young woman and the little girl had looked into the trash can when they passed by. Several times he wanted to turn around and look outside, but he didn't dare, fearing that if he looked out, the young woman or the little girl would see him again, and he would see pity, contempt, or any other strange look in their eyes. His heart was filled with contradictions.

So he leaned against the door, calmed down, and listened carefully to the sounds outside the wooden house. All he heard was the sound of a car engine, which seemed to be starting nearby and driving away.

"Surely the young woman and the little girl have left," he guessed, secretly praying that although they saw him reach into the trash can, they didn't pay much attention.

This was a strange psychological effect. In fact, he knew that even if he was a beggar and the young woman and the little girl saw him searching in the trash can, they might not care much, but he couldn't get over that mental barrier.

After standing by the door for a while and hearing no more sounds, he finally felt relieved. He turned and looked through the door crack, and indeed, the young woman and the little girl were gone, at least out of his sight.

He sighed with relief, and as soon as he relaxed, he quickly felt hungry and thought of the apple again.

Just as he was about to go out of the wooden house, he heard the sound of a car engine again. A black sedan drove over, and Xu Mo hesitated for a moment and stopped.

But just as the car passed, a few young women, laughing and chatting, walked over from a distance. Although they were far away, he could still see that they were dressed well and looked lively, a world apart from his current desolation.

He was so hungry that he no longer had the heart to dwell on the differences between himself and others. He only thought about the apple in the trash can and hoped that these young women would pass quickly. Unfortunately, these young women seemed to know his thoughts and deliberately went against them, walking slowly and chatting, taking a long time to move just a few steps.

Xu Mo sighed and retreated to sit against the wall of the wooden house, thinking, "These people are walking so slowly. I don't know when they will leave. It's no use being anxious; I might as well sit and wait."

As soon as he sat down, his thoughts quickly shifted from the apple in the trash can to the reality of his situation. He couldn't help but feel sad, never having imagined that he would be in such a state, spending so much time in a dilapidated wooden house waiting for others to leave just to get a rotten apple from a trash can.

He felt like crying but couldn't, and all his mixed thoughts eventually turned into a sigh of helplessness.

Then he thought about the static breathing technique he had practiced. He had worked hard to reach this point, and although it had many wonderful effects, it didn't seem to help his life much.

Moreover, when he practiced static breathing, his body's energy consumption increased, making him feel hungrier.

Thinking about being hungrier, he suddenly remembered a theory he had once considered: "When practicing static breathing, due to the faster breathing, the pores on the body expand, and most of the heat generated by the body's energy consumption is dissipated and wasted."

"If I control my breathing and reduce the expansion of the pores, I can retain the heat that would otherwise be wasted, achieving efficient use of heat and thus reducing the rate of energy consumption."

"By doing this, compared to ordinary people, I can persist longer on the same amount of food because I use the heat generated by energy consumption more efficiently."

He had read about the term "abstaining from food" in fantasy and martial arts novels. For humans, absorbing energy from the air or sunlight was clearly unreasonable.

Therefore, he didn't know how the characters in those novels managed to abstain from food. However, his theory, in terms of the result, had a similar effect to abstaining from food.

Understanding the principle and mastering the static breathing technique, which controlled breathing, blood circulation, and the rate of energy consumption, made it easy to implement.

He experimented according to his theory several times and quickly achieved "breath as still as a mountain, blood as flowing as a river." As his breathing slowed, his blood circulation actually accelerated, and the expansion of his pores was related to his blood circulation, making it easy to achieve.

He was delighted and immediately practiced. The heat was retained in his body, while his skin felt cool, similar to a cold-blooded animal, which was quite remarkable.

Unfortunately, this method couldn't stop the hunger he already felt. No matter how he practiced, his stomach remained empty.

Thinking of the rotten apple again, he was about to get up to see if the young women had passed when he suddenly heard a knock on the door.

Someone was actually knocking on the door of the wooden house.

Xu Mo was startled and then puzzled: "This wooden house is empty, and the nearby residents should know that. Who is outside, and why are they knocking? Could it be the owner of the wooden house, who found out I was inside and came to drive me away? Although the wooden house can shelter me from the wind, I have already mastered static breathing, which makes me immune to cold and heat, so I don't have to stay here. I can leave without waiting for the owner to drive me away."

Thinking this, he immediately got up from the ground, walked to the door, and opened it.

But as soon as he opened the door and looked out, he was surprised again. Standing outside the door was the little girl he had seen not long ago.

The little girl was only four or five years old, standing alone outside, wrapped in a pink down jacket with a fur trim. The hat of the down jacket was on her head, revealing only half of her rosy, white face. She looked up at Xu Mo with her big, watery eyes, holding a large convenience bag and lifting it up with effort, saying, "Uncle, eat!"

Hearing the little girl's innocent and caring voice, Xu Mo felt a sudden pang of sadness, as if his inner thoughts had been exposed and his vulnerability seen. Even though it was just a little girl, he felt as if he was completely naked and exposed to her, which gave him a sense of humiliation.

He instinctively turned his head away, unable to meet her gaze, and closed the door again, returning to the wooden house.

It was his ridiculous sense of self-respect that was at play. He could put aside his pride and pick up a rotten apple from the trash can when no one was watching, but he couldn't accept charity from others. Even though he immediately felt regret after closing the door, if he had to choose again, the result would be the same.

Leaning against the door, he felt the weight of the charity, which made him breathe heavily.

The little girl didn't leave but knocked on the door again, asking innocently, "Uncle, are you still there?"

Hearing her innocent and kind voice, Xu Mo had no courage to answer.

The wooden house fell silent, and the outside also fell silent. Xu Mo didn't speak, and the little girl didn't speak either. The wind outside the wooden house howled, and the atmosphere inside the wooden house became increasingly oppressive.

After a long time, Xu Mo came to his senses and listened to the sounds outside the door. Apart from the wind, there were no other sounds. He couldn't help but think, "The wind is so strong; the little girl must have left because she was cold."

Thinking this, he opened the door again.

"Uncle!"

The little girl stood in the wind, lifting the convenience bag with effort again. She looked up at Xu Mo with her eyes wide open.

Xu Mo almost shed tears. In the two years since his parents had disappeared, he hadn't felt such care from anyone else.

He reached out to hold the door, barely standing steady, and no longer had the strength to close it, staring fixedly at the little girl.

The two of them, one big and one small, stared at each other in silence.

"Uncle!"

The little girl called out again and walked into the wooden house. Xu Mo subconsciously made way for her.

The little girl entered the wooden house, put the convenience bag on the ground, took off her down jacket's hat, turned around, and looked at Xu Mo again.

This time, her whole face was visible. She had a round face with over a dozen small braids, two of which were a bit messy from being pressed under the hat.

Seeing the little girl's face, Xu Mo was startled. Her appearance gave him a sense of familiarity, as if he had seen her somewhere before.

After turning around, the little girl looked at Xu Mo carefully again, then walked up to him, reached out, and hugged his legs, calling, "Dad!"

——

PS: These chapters are quite emotional, but they have to be written because some of the later plot developments require emotional motivation. And if no one helps Xu Mo in his current situation, should he really have to beg for a living?

If an adult (or an adult woman) were to help him in such a situation, it would be unrealistic. In this society, even when begging, others would at most give you some food or a few dollars and leave. Who would invest much more in you?

However, it's different when it happens to a child. The innocence of a child is something only children have, and I believe most people can accept it.

In the place where I live, there is a little fat boy, probably in the second or third grade of elementary school. Every time I see him, if he is walking in front of me and opens the security door of the building, he will definitely hold the door for me until I pass.

I have been waited for up to ten seconds. I believe that if I walked even slower, he would still wait, but I never do that. When I see someone holding the door for me, I speed up my steps.

Don't underestimate these ten seconds. In this era, if it were an adult, they would hardly stay for a second for someone they don't know. I praise this little boy.

——

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