Chapter 8

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Not sure if anyone likes to listen to music while they read but this one felt a little fitting, sorta.

Chapter 8, Birthday

It wasn’t until Hare’s figure mixed into the crowd and left his sight did Ye Zi finally come back to his senses, and he could feel his heart beating fast. It’s not like he fell in love, but that was a confession after all. It was his first time experiencing such a formal confession, and it was impossible to say that he didn’t feel touched at all.

But Ye Zi still couldn’t understand.

He liked him?

Why would Hare have feelings for him? They had terrible beginnings and their meetings were filled with threats, fear, and danger. There was no compelling reason for Hare to like him at all.

His confession felt more like an act. It was unrealistic.

His head was constantly in a blur on his way home. Then, he thought of his girlfriend and decided to send her a text.

His girlfriend would sometimes call Ye Zi with enthusiasm or send him a text, but she would throw a tantrum if he did not respond. She couldn’t care less whether Ye Zi was at work or was already dead tired. And sometimes, she wouldn’t respond to him at all. The texts he received from her the next day would sometimes be completely unrelated to what he texted her, such as things like she was getting her hair done, and asking Ye Zi what color he thought would be nice and whatnot.

Seeing that the 1st of February was just around the corner, Ye Zi really wanted to remind her.

His girlfriend’s birthday had been celebrated just a month after they got together. During that time, Ye Zi called over all the students of his department as the vice department head and spent many days on the planning. On that night, he took his girlfriend to the school’s lecture theatre to watch a romantic movie. As soon as the lights came back on after the movie, a bunch of colorful balloons floated up, and a cake was also brought out. While the students sang her a birthday song, Ye Zi put on a birthday crown on top of her head.

His girlfriend was so touched at that time that she actually cried. They really were so in love at that time that he thought they could be lovey-dovey forever.

But now, his phone was completely silent. Ye Zi sighed.

Then, he laughed at himself.

His own girlfriend didn’t really care about him, but that crazy guy was always orbiting around him.

But whatever, it’s just a birthday. He’s already an adult, what was he being so excited for?

While in his thoughts, Ye Zi suddenly stopped. His body froze.

There, over the crosswalk, right in the middle of the crowd.

A beautiful red-haired woman was there. She had an attractive oval face with red lips over fair skin. Even though it was cold today, she only wore a wink coat with a black skirt, as well as a pair of heels in red.

Ye Zi felt his blood run cold.

He could recognize that woman better than anyone. Her skin, her flesh…All of that turned to nothing under his own knife. So why…

Ye Zi rubbed his eyes.

But then, several cars whizzed by.

By the time Ye Zi looked over again, the lights were green, and Jiang Wei had disappeared.

This incident ended up becoming Ye Zi’s nightmare.

The next day, he took the day off and went to that warehouse. There were no traces of anything having been moved where he buried her head. The rest of it had already been cleaned up back then. Even the tools were thrown away. He wouldn’t be stupid enough to dig the head up again, but he went over to loiter around Jiang Wei’s residence. Pretending to be a delivery man, he asked the old lady downstairs about her.

The old lady pointed to the worn-out missing poster on the telephone pole and said, “That child disappeared. It’s already been half a year almost…”

The poster was dated a week she was killed.

Ye Zi breathed a sigh of relief.

There was no need for him to be so jumpy, that might just be someone who looked like her. That woman was definitely dead, there was no doubt about it. Ye Zi was a firm materialist and never believed in things like gods or spirits or whatever.

***

January 31.

After waking up, brushing his teeth, and getting dressed, Ye Zi headed for the subway.

After getting a seat, Ye Zi began to feel a little drowsy. He took out his phone and saw that his inbox was filled with messages from Hare. He did not look at the ones from yesterday, but there were three new ones today.

[7:30 P.M.]

Hare: Good morning, Ah Zi.

[8:00 P.M.]

Hare: Did you leave without eating again? You need to eat your breakfast or you won’t have any energy to work.

[8:20 P.M.]

Hare: I see you. Can I sit beside you?

There was indeed someone sitting beside Ye Zi.

Ye Zi did not turn to look at him, but from his fair and slender fingers on the seat, as well as his long legs that were covered up by his school pants, he could easily identify who that person was.

Ye Zi felt a little annoyed. He sent Hare a message, saying, “I don’t remember ever accepting you.”

Hare’s fingers moved quickly beside him. Soon, he received his message.

[8:25 P.M.]

Hare: Am I still not allowed to talk to you? TT

Hare: But that’s fine. This is nice too.

Then, neither of them said anything.

As the train moved across the stations, two grey figures, one tall and one short, constantly flitted past the ground, disappearing fast away.

Ye Zi rested his head on the back of the hard, faintly vibrating seat, feeling sleepy.

Just one stop before he arrived at his station, the person beside him was gone. Instead, there was a bag of food. There was a cream bun, a small carton of warm milk, and a tea egg inside.

Instinctively, Ye Zi checked his inbox. Sure enough, he left him a message.

[8:40 P.M.]

Hare: You should eat it while it’s hot.

[8:42 P.M.]

Hare: I was very happy I got to sit with you today. Also, I have a question, Ah Zi.

[8:43 P.M.]

Hare: Do you still like sparklers?

Sparklers? They’re all right.

But…what did he mean by still?

***

February 1st, it was his birthday.

The skies were clear today and the thin layer of snow on the ground had already melted away.

If this was the past, then Ye Zi’s mother would definitely cook him a delicious meal. Even if there was no cake, he still got the birthday atmosphere from it. But his mom and his uncle were off for their honeymoon these few days and would only return after the Lunar New Year’s. Ye Zi was actually very happy for them as well. They were as loving and romantic like a young couple.

But there was a price to their love. His mother was no longer as focused on Ye Zi as before. But well, he’s not a child anyway. What’s there to be jealous about?

He received a call from his mom and his uncle this morning, wishing him a happy birthday, and Ye Zi really was quite happy about it. He performed very well at work today as well.

In the evening, he met up with Jiang Wen who had just returned from his vacation and a bunch of their other buddies and went to the arcade to have some fun. Then, they had beer and barbecue which kept them warm from the cold. A middle-aged woman was dancing to the music while he and his buddies played cards. It wasn’t a bad evening at all. He actually rarely came out to play with his friends after he got himself a girlfriend.

But nobody knew that it was Ye Zi’s birthday today.

After playing for a bit, they began playing truth or dare instead. That game was practically ancient.

Someone would always get punished and they had to do things like confessing to that older woman, asking for a “smash”, taking their clothes off, or whatever. There were absolutely no limits to their fooling around. More and more people participated in the game and things got really lively after that. When Ye Zi saw them pleading for mercy while being punished to roll around on the frozen turf and being mounted like horses, Ye Zi laughed.

Suddenly, his phone vibrated.

Ye Zi picked it up and checked it. It was a message from Hare. Ye Zi was no longer disgusted anymore at this point and was even a little curious, so he opened it up to see.

[Hare: I’m by the flower bed. Do you see me? I brought sparklers ^^]

Ye Zi raised his head and looked over to the raised flower bed nearby. The lady was dancing on the left side of it, while someone was holding sparklers at the right. Sparks of fire constantly poured out from his hands, and it was actually a really dazzling sight at night.

“What’re you looking at?” Jiang Wen put his arm over Ye Zi and laughed. “Don’t get distracted now, it’s your time to draw.”

Ye Zi drew a card, but he couldn’t control his eyes at all. He turned to look over at the flowerbed again.

Hare was still standing there alone with two sparklers constantly burning away in his hands. Though the sparklers didn’t burn too brightly, it was still beautiful. It illuminated his face, and he could see that he had been staring at himself, as if he had been standing there for a really, really long time; like he had already frozen into ice, motionless.

Someone called out to him again, “What’re you dreaming about, handsome? It’s your turn to draw. Has winning got you too lax?”

Ye Zi drew another card.

Then, he saw Hare lowering his arms. The sparklers were still burning by his sides as he continued to stare at him, at the group of people having fun. Still, he remained alone.

Could he actually have been infected by that gloomy guy? Ye Zi felt uncomfortable inside, and he couldn’t explain why.

Moreover, there was also a strange sense of familiarity welling up inside of him.

The round soon ended and the crowd began to howl. “Woo! It’s the gay round! Jiang Wen, go! Give Ye Zi a kiss!”

Only then did Ye Zi gradually come back to his senses. “Huh?”

Everyone was obviously very excited. “Haha, this one’s for you, Jiang Wen! Haven’t you always been very protective of our handsome boy Ye Zi here? Be honest, you like him right? Hm? Anyway, it’s not like Little Miss Nie is here so why don’t you give him a nice kiss? Leave a hickey for his girlfriend too. That’ll show her for keeping Ye Zi from us!”

Jiang Wen wanted to put his arm around Ye Zi, but when he turned to look at him, Jiang Wen’s face actually turned red despite usually having little to no shame.

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

Everyone began to chant louder and louder. More and more people were looking over now as well.

“Yezi[1],” Jiang Wen called out awkwardly to him again, spurred a little by his drunkenness.

Then, he turned over and aimed for Ye Zi’s lips!

Ye Zi was so shocked that he quickly turned his head. Jiang Wen only managed to kiss him on the cheek but he could feel it. It was hot.

The sounds of camera shutters clicking away could be heard while some even clicked their tongues, disappointed.

After the onlookers dispersed, Jiang Wen said apologetically to Ye Zi, “I know you don’t like gay stuff, but it wasn’t on purpose…”

“It’s fine. It’s just a game.”

Even though Ye Zi said that, he still felt upset. Not because of the kiss on his cheek, but for another reason.

Hare was still standing there by the flowerbed, but his sparklers have already burned out a long time ago.

He had no idea why, but Ye Zi felt a little guilty.

He took out his phone, wondering whether he should say something to Hare.

Right at that moment, his phone vibrated again. Ye Zi quickly checked and see.

[Hare: Happy Birthday.]

As soon as he received that text message, he heard a loud bang. Fireworks shot straight into the air from behind the flowerbeds, and an array of colorful flowers bloomed wantonly in the winter night, instantly lighting up the city. Everyone raised their heads at once, cheers and exclamations rising up one after the other.

Hare did not say that he was the one who set the fireworks, but Ye Zi was no fool. He knew that it was Hare.

He couldn’t describe how he felt at this moment. He wasn’t a girl and wouldn’t go soft just because of something like this, but he really did feel moved. Nobody had ever done so much for him or knew so much about him. Clearly, nobody else remembered his birthday except for his own family, but Hare remembered. He alone brought so many fireworks with him, standing by the flower bed, lighting up some small sparklers while he looked at him. Then, after saying “Happy Birthday”, the entire night sky was lit up by fireworks

His confession from last time echoed in his heart, again and again.

What sort of feelings could a person have that allowed themselves to be used, and to be fine even if they were hated, rejected, or even cursed at?

Ye Zi thought back to the question he asked him.

Do you still like sparklers?

What was that supposed to mean?

Spurred by his instincts, Ye Zi stood up. He even felt the urge to see him and to ask him face by face. There were so, so many things he wanted to ask.

But as the fireworks continued to erupt above him, Hare was already gone.

After the fireworks ended, the lady who came out to dance had also returned home while the surroundings turned quiet once more. Ye Zi and his group also began their journey home.

Nobody went to check behind the flowerbed where those fireworks were set.

Most likely, the cleaning lady who would come by the next day would be quite upset.

Because, right on the ground at the bottom of the flowerbed were dense, crooked, but clear words written down with the ashes of the sparklers. Just like a curse kept in hell, it continued to chant without ever growing tired.

Take your hand away. Who said you could touch him…

Trash. Get away from him.

Disgusting

Just die

Die

Die

Die die die die die…

DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE…

But of course, Ye Zi knew nothing about that. In fact, he was still immersed naively in his own emotions.

He had no idea at all about the hidden dangers that would surface soon after.

|TOC|

Notes:

[1]叶梓 vs 叶子. Pronounced the same way but Ye Zi is his name and the latter, Yezi aka leaf is his nickname.

Anyone else feeling lonely in the lockdown? Feels really quiet lately 😥 I feel so lonely I’m actually tempted to join a TL group haha but I got my own stuff to finish 😫

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