Chapter 12

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Chen Gong gave Zheng Yi a call when he reached the hotel room.

Zheng Yi knocked on his door ten minutes later. “I was… wandering about. Where’d you go?”

Chen Gong shuffled the documents in his hand. He turned to look at the bleary-eyed Zheng Yi and avoided the question. “Sorry… I forgot to give you the room key.”

Zheng Yi smiled. “It’s fine…”

Zheng Yi’s smile belied his thoughts. In actual fact, he’d already gotten a room with his own ID— 1206, right next to Chen Gong’s— and had taken the chance to catch his forty winks while Chen Gong was away.

He only continued to act as if he’d lost his ID card and still needed to stay with Chen Gong so that he might have another opportunity to check if Chen Gong had that heart-shaped birthmark on his left breast.

Once he was able to ascertain this, he could pretend to discover the hole in his pocket, dig the ID card out of it and, with a face of shock and annoyance, say, “So here it was! Urgh, I’ll never buy this brand again!” And scene.

Perfect.

Going over the script again in his mind, Zheng Yi sprawled out on the bed and stretched. “I’m so sleepy. Chen Gong, are you gonna shower?”

Chen Gong was gazing absent-mindedly at the documents in his hand and didn’t hear Zheng Yi. “What?”

“I asked if you were gonna shower…” Zheng Yi improvised further, “You must’ve worked up a sweat after surveying all day…”

Chen Gong raised his arm and sniffed. “If you think I stink, go get a temporary ID card and rent your own room— it’s only 4km away, you can make it.”

Hastily, Zheng Yi elaborated: “Oh no, no, the thing is… I want a shower. I meant… if you’re gonna use it, you go ahead first… I can go after, it’s fine…”

As Chen Gong watched Zheng Yi explain with a somewhat deferential look on his face, his heart gave an unexpected thump. Zheng Yi was forced to seek shelter under his roof; with his high-strung personality, it must not be a pleasant experience… And here he was, misunderstanding him and chasing him away. Wasn’t that a little too much?

Chen Gong put the documents on his backpack and grabbed a beer out of the mini fridge. “You go ahead— take a nap after you shower. It’s 4:23 now, I’ll wake you at 6 and… we can go have hotpot…”

Improvising on his script just made things more complicated. Zheng Yi could only steel himself, pulling off his clothes and grabbing his phone before walking into the bathroom in his boxers.

As he passed Chen Gong, his eyes carelessly passed over the sheaf of documents and caught a few words.

Glancing, he’d paid it no mind, but as the words spelled themselves out in his head and came into focus, Zheng Yi suddenly reacted. “Death Certificate”.

Like a machine gun he shot three rapid texts to Qiu Mang:

[What’s up with Chen Gong?]

[I saw him holding a death certificate and spacing out!]

[Scary shit!]

Then he sat on the toilet, anxiously awaiting Qiu Mang’s reply.

Three minutes later came two messages from Qiu Mang.

[Must be updating the family register after his mum passed.] [1]

[1] The family register, or hukou (户口), is an official form of household registration in mainland China.

[She was sick for years and went last year. All happened before you came in, so I never mentioned it to you.]

Reading Qiu Mang’s two texts, Zheng Yi felt his head grow unwittingly hot. At a loss for words, it took him a while to reply: [Why didn’t you mention it earlier…]

Qiu Mang: [No need to mention a colleague’s personal affairs.]

Zheng Yi: [Now what?]

Qiu Mang: [What what?]

Zheng Yi: [Never mind…]

Qiu Mang: [Zheng Yi I’m telling you, no funny business! This is a personal matter, and you’re not even friends with Chen Gong, you have no right. So don’t shoot your mouth off, remember to respect boundaries!]

Zheng Yi: [Yeah I know]

After responding to Ms Qiu’s “lesson”, Zheng Yi heard Chen Gong moving outside. It sounded like he was tidying his luggage, or rummaging through something… Zheng Yi didn’t know why, but he felt uncomfortable, and it was going to his head.

He thought about it a bit more, then replied to Qiu Mang: [Now I know why he always tells me not to say “motherfucker” to him…]

Qiu Mang: […]

Qiu Mang: [Even if his mother were hale and hearty you still shouldn’t do that!]

Zheng Yi: [I’ll change right now! :sorry:]

Qiu Mang: [k. Didn’t someone report Chen Gong for doing personal stuff on company dime? This was what he was doing.]

Zheng Yi: [Sis, I was joking…]

Zheng Yi: [Sigh… kinda wanna give him a hug]

Zheng Yi: [But you’re right, I have no motherfucking right to.]

Zheng Yi: [!… I have no right to.]

Qiu Mang: [… :sweats:]

Qiu Mang: [Eh?!]

Zheng Yi: [What?]

Qiu Mang: [Wait, are you interested in my xuezhang?]

Zheng Yi: [???]

Zheng Yi: [I just felt bad for him. He and I get on like oil and water, you know that!]

Qiu Mang: [“oil and water” is for people who really hate each other!]

Qiu Mang: [I think your constant pestering is just to get Chen Gong’s attention! :doge:]

Zheng Yi: [???]

Qiu Mang: [You’re a little prince used to everyone’s attention and suddenly you meet someone who doesn’t give you the time of day, so he catches your eye and you can’t help but scheme to have him, right?]

Zheng Yi: [wtf is this nonsense!]

Qiu Mang: [That’s how all the novels go!]

Zheng Yi: [:annoyed: :annoyed: :annoyed: read less trash fiction please!]

–

Chen Gong sorted out his documents and put them in his suitcase, then carefully went over, twice, the luggage for tomorrow’s journey back to the city.

Once he was done, Chen Gong sat on the sofa, turning and glancing unintentionally at the bathroom. Behind the frosted glass, the warm yellow light outlined a blurry silhouette of Zheng Yi washing his hair in the shower. Though blurred, his figure was good, like a model’s.

Chen Gong felt like laughing. If Zheng Yi, proud as he was, knew that his arch rival was watching him soap himself, even give his crotch a few rubs… it may just be a hazy silhouette, but the princely Lord Zheng would probably feel like dying.

Had the two been good friends, he would probably take a few covert photos and save them, so whenever Zheng Yi offended him, he could take it out and threaten him— “anyone wanna see Zheng Yi washing his nuts?” —and Zheng Yi would be begging his mercy before he’d reached the end of his sentence.

This struck Chen Gong as funny at first, but then he remembered that conversation—”“But if I do manage to catch him, I wouldn’t really go for a pretty-boy idiot like him — I’ll just get a secret “intimate video” to live off of later on.”

Those lines had scarcely faded away before another rose to the fore of his mind— “Zheng Yi had a date tonight, but he still focussed on work. He went back to the office after his date, around 10 — so you can at least think of him as diligent even if you don’t think much of his work…”

Chen Gong no longer felt the urge to laugh.

He turned to look at the bathroom partition. Zheng Yi seemed to almost drop the shower head in his hand before quickly grabbing it, only to have the water jets shoot directly at his face— like a fool.

This fool probably had no clue about the unkind judgements that his beloved little sheep had passed on him behind his back… and even less of a clue that the date he had rushed to was actually a pit of fire…

Though Chen Gong had attempted to use work as an excuse and Qiu Mang as its executor to stop Zheng Yi’s date, he still went in the end.

In his excitement, with his simple and passionate love, he stepped into the pit without a shred of suspicion.

Chen Gong watched Zheng Yi’s showering silhouette, the guilt overwhelming him.

—If he’d been engulfed by the flames of the pit… Chen Gong, you were the other hand that pushed him in.

As if shocked, Chen Gong rose suddenly from the sofa.

But after he stood, he had nothing to do. Chen Gong walked over to the table and took a few gulps of his freshly opened beer. As he did so, he picked up Zheng Yi’s jacket from the bed and hung it on the rack, clearing a space on the bed— once Zheng Yi was done showering, he could have a good nap, and then they’d go out for hot pot together in the evening… it’d been a long time since he had a hotpot at home.

Chen Gong sat back down on the sofa and was about to catch some sleep himself when his eyes were suddenly drawn to the two cards that had fallen on the bed. They must have fallen out of Zheng Yi’s jacket. He should put them away for him, they may be important…

When Zheng Yi walked out of the bathroom drying his hair, Chen Gong was sitting cross-legged on the sofa, smoking.

The room door was open— probably to let out the smoke.

“Do you have any more smokes? I’m out.”

Chen Gong gestured to the table with his chin. “Get them yourself.”

Zheng Yi hummed in assent and walked over to the table, still rubbing his head. “Are you gonna shower?”

Chen Gong ignored him, staring out the window as he exhaled a cloud of smoke.

Not receiving a response, Zheng Yi glanced at Chen Gong, muttering internally at his sudden depressive mood. Only when he looked back to take the cigarettes did Zheng Yi notice the two cards neatly laid out upon the table.

He’d only just showered, and now his back was covered in cold sweat. Zheng Yi’s mind whirred rapidly—escape now or stand his ground? If he were to escape, where to? Did any manned spacecraft take civilian passengers? If he couldn’t escape, how would he explain the situation? If they started a physical fight, could he beat Chen Gong?

At the corner of his eye, he saw Chen Gong stand up.

Zheng Yi felt his calves go soft, his mind’s racing thoughts crashing together with a thundering rumble, his brain shutting down.

The lights were off in the room. Sunlight streamed through the window from behind Chen Gong, sketching his form with a golden outline but leaving his face dark and unreadable…

Zheng Yi peeked at Chen Gong. Chen Gong stubbed out his cigarette and asked, “What are you trying to do?”

Zheng Yi’s brain failed to restart. “I…”

“Are you trying to fuck with me?”

Zheng Yi’s brain still failed to restart. “No…”

Chen Gong looked at Zheng Yi— his hair rubbing motions had stopped midway, as if he had completely blue-screened.

His line of sight passed over Zheng Yi’s shoulder. The room door was ajar, and the cleaning lady working in the opposite room was looking over.

Chen Gong didn’t have the energy to deal with her. He returned his gaze to Zheng Yi’s face. “What were you planning, lying to me? Was it a lot of fun sleeping with me?”

Zheng Yi’s brain was completely out of action—in this situation, he simply could not invent a suitable explanation.

Taking a few breaths, Zheng Yi raised his hand in a “calm down” gesture to Chen Gong. “I wasn’t planning on doing anything, I wasn’t trying to put you on or fuck with you, and honestly sleeping with you was pretty awkward. Don’t be mad, I only just found the ID card…”

“You already got your own room and you came over to mine to shower? And you kept asking if I wanted to shower? What the hell are you playing at? Director Zheng, come clean with me, alright?!”

Zheng Yi watched the approaching Chen Gong.

The closer he came, the more Zheng Yi felt he could see the coldness in Chen Gong’s eyes.

The coldness scared him, made him nervous.

Zheng Yi understood. This afternoon Chen Gong had been removing his only relation from his family register; in legal terms, Chen Gong was completely alone in the world… though it was not apparent in Chen Gong’s face, Zheng Yi knew that this was likely his most vulnerable moment…

Yet at this moment, he had no right to help Chen Gong shoulder his burdens. Instead, here he was adding a whole mess of others.

Zheng Yi was determined that he would rather die than say “I wanted to check if you’re the victim of this hidden camera crime, as I suspect”. But other than that, he didn’t know what else to say.

The more he thought about it, the less he could find a solution, and the more he panicked.

In his mind, a fuse blew. His mind heated, and he said, “Honestly, isn’t it just that you don’t like me?! Honestly, don’t you just resent that I’m on top of you?!”

Chen Gong laughed mirthlessly and drew a cigarette from its box, putting it in his mouth. “Tell me what designs you had, lying to me… don’t change the subject.”

“I…” Zheng Yi suppressed his temper and thought hard about it, but still couldn’t find an excuse. In his eyes, Chen Gong and the drowsy man from the video overlapped, the T-shirt disappearing, revealing the heart-shaped birthmark on his chest…

Zheng Yi shook off the crazy hallucination, feeling the painful burning of his forehead as he thought: Fine then, I’ll admit it, I’ll give in this time, I’m so tired of arguing… I’m not some awful person, and you’re such a good person too, if only we’d met on better footing… we could have been bros, or even just friends would have been good; even as coworkers, how could we possibly have ended up in this inexplicable situation?

Chen Gong listened to Zheng Yi stutter as he clicked his lighter at the tip of his cigarette, cocking his head and looking at him.

Zheng Yi looked over with an exhausted expression. “I just wanted to look at your boobs…”

The flame flickered out with a poof. “What did you say?” Chen Gong exclaimed in alarm.

Zheng Yi’s eyes lit up, as if he had finally mustered the courage to say it: “Chen Gong, I have designs on your body, I do want to sleep with you, I do want to fuck with you, I like you!”

Qiu Mang’s nonsense inspired him. This explains everything, thought Zheng Yi.

It must have broken in my pocket, Chen Gong thought as his cigarette snapped in half, dangling uselessly for a moment before falling to the ground.

–

The author has something to say:

—Little Theatre—

Azha: “Who called it ‘trash fiction’?”

Zheng Yi: “…”

Chen Gong: “Suits you right! Dad, beat him up, write him to death!”

Zheng Yi: “…”

—Little Theatre 2—

The cleaning lady next door who had heard snippets of their conversation came over to tell them: “Aw look kids, don’t fight, this sort of thing needs to be talked out reasonably—it doesn’t matter who’s on top and who’s the bottom, <3!”

Chen Gong: “?”

Zheng Yi: “?”

–

Credits:

Author – Liang Azha (Weibo|Twitter)

Raws – Nandemonaiya

Translation – Nandemonaiya

Proofreading – Nandemonaiya, Terukutie, Zhiming

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< Chapter 11. The Waiting-at-the-Door Incident

> Chapter 13. The Conversation Over Hotpot Incident

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