Chouka

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Alright folks, it`s time to strap yourselves in for yet another depressing part of Flower of Winter!

Big thanks to @abrownfeminist and @silverfoxkit for reading this over and catching all my dumb mistakes!

Like before:

DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO BE SPOILED FOR THE ENDING OF THE LIGHT NOVELS! The anime ends waaay before the novels do.

For those looking for the Prologue and Introduction, you can find them here.

Chouka

On the day

Chouka was born, the world was frozen over with snow.

Ryuuki

remembered that night, in the snow fallen garden, it was difficult to cut

flowers like he always had. That day, the flowers he chose were white and red

blossoms.

Chouka.

It was a

name that suggested lips like a red camellia, and skin like a white camellia.

The crow perched in the tree could not even imagine such a thing when he looked

down on the Emperor`s crying, jet-black haired daughter, who

seemed more like a monkey than a human.

That year,

before the snow had melted, Shuurei passed away.

Their

marriage that lasted not even a year ended that day.

Whether he

had been happy during that time, even Ryuuki himself did not know. Both happy

and painful feelings intersected, causing his tears to stream down his face.

While

holding Chouka, he realized that this pain wouldn`t disappear. Like an unending

winter, the days would repeat. And so it became reality.

However,

something changed.

From the

day of the funeral, whenever Ryuuki was gone, Chouka would cry. The ladies in

waiting responsible for her care would find him, wherever he was, and have him

return to Chouka. Ryuuki would sleep with her in his bed, and had a cradle

placed in his office. And so every morning, he left with Chouka tucked in his

right arm.

He would

place his daughter in her cradle, and soon after officials would selfishly come

in to see her. Both military and government officials would pass right by the Emperor

and rock Chouka. They would linger for a few moments, until they caused her to

cry and then run away. They were horrible.

Even when

he had to visit other departments, he brought Chouka with him. “We don’t have

confidence we can keep her from crying until the Emperor returns!” the ladies

in waiting had cried. Thus rather than looking like the Emperor loved his

daughter, it seemed that he

watched over her out

of compulsion.

They were

welcomed in the four ministries and six departments (although it was clear that

the one being welcomed was not Ryuuki). In contrast, the officials in morning

court session cold-heartedly said,“Don`t bring her”. When the political discussions began however,

Ryuuki looked at Chouka sleeping on his knee and made a decision.

When

Chouka was hungry, when she accidently rolled and couldn`t return to her

original position, or when he was clumsy, she would cry during these necessary

times. Other than that, however, she was quiet and would sleep when she wanted.

During the rare times that she was fussy, he would take her outside for a walk.

It was a nice change of pace.

Even when she

started climbing out of her cradle and crawling around, Chouka didn`t make any

noise. In fact, what bothered Ryuuki the most was that there were times he

forgot her existence, until she grabbed his leg and babbled at him.

In the

middle of the night, Chouka would bawl. Ryuuki would pick up his daughter and

circle the palace grounds, humming a lullaby. Ever since Shuurei had died, he

didn`t feel like sleeping, so there was no problem. While looking at his

Chouka`s sleeping face, he would find himself nodding off. The two of them

would collapse in an empty room in the inner palace. On such mornings he woke to

a blanket, and a nearby Shuuei or Seiran laughingly saying “Good morning, Your

Majesty”.

Sometimes,

he would leave Chouka in the hands of another and venture out alone. If his

daughter chased after him, he would turn around and give up on going out. If

her dark eyes just followed his departure, he would step out.

When the

latter occurred, he would walk around the palace feeling that there would be no

problem if he just disappeared. When he returned to the inner palace, Chouka

would be quieter than usual. She seemed dejected, and wouldn`t come near him.

Those

days, even though he had no one to give them too, Ryuuki would still cut

flowers. When he saw that his daughter was depressed like he was, he would

approach her with flowers in his hand and hold her close.

Every time

he did so, he began to think. The day when he would be forced to leave Chouka

behind would surely come. Perhaps not today or tomorrow, but one day. She would

be left all alone. It was something that deeply concerned him.

Thus, even

when he felt like he could walk no more, he followed the path back to her.

While his daughter didn’t change his colorless world, or the bleak path that he

walked alone, he certainly felt different when he held his daughter close to

his heart.

After some

years had passed, he realized that there was something strange about her.

She would

suddenly wake in the middle of the night, and turn her small face towards the

moon. While walking in the gardens with Ryuuki in the early afternoon, she

would reach her hands out towards the old sakura tree near the Sentoukyuu.

During the

morning court meeting, she would look towards Ryuuki`s left, where no one was

standing. It was the place where the King`s advisor should have been. He

considered whether or not she was looking at the ghost of Yuushun.

However,

it seemed that those other than Ryuuki were more puzzled by Chouka`s outward

appearance.

When she

was about four or five years old, a princess with pearl like cheeks and long

eyelashes, she was playing alone in the Emperor`s office.

“She

doesn`t look like Kou Shuurei at all”, a high ranking official uttered and

left.

“Ahh,

Shuurei-dono sure gave birth to a beautiful girl. If only I was twenty years

old…” Shuuei would blurt out, a little too honestly. He would be chased off by

an enraged Seiran.

Around

this time, Chouka still didn`t speak much.

Her older

brother, Riou, and the three aides [Seiran, Shuuei, Kouyuu] were greatly

worried, but Ryuuki wasn`t very bothered by it.

Even when the

ladies in waiting or Shuurei` old friends spoke to her affectionately, she

would only reply in single words.

As Ryuuki,

whenever she spoke he would put down his writing brush and wait, play a golden

koto (he only knew how to play two songs, but it seemed that his daughter

didn`t mind), and take her on walks to her favorite places.

His

daughter had strange taste. Her favorite places were the retired Sou Taifu`s

manor, her grandfather Shouka`s house and the Sentoukyuu.

Around

that time, an older lady in waiting took Chouka to a different room, and her

days of sleeping tucked in with her father were over. As usual, Ryuuki didn`t

sleep well, but there was no longer any need to wander the palace humming

lullabies.

He devoted

much of his nights to his work, but sometimes when he would play the koto in a pavilion, Shuuei would appear, holding

Chouka`s hand. On nights like those they would stroll about like old times.

Though he no

longer carried Chouka with him to the outer court, she would come every day to

seek her father out on her own accord. The ladies in waiting would raise their

eyebrows, but Ryuuki let her do as she pleased.

Chouka would

lay on a cushion in the corner of his office and read books and study. When

they were free, Riou or the other important officials would become her

teachers.

Shin Sou,

who traveled to various regions and Tou Eigetsu would come visit the palace and

share stories from all over the country. She would listen and ask quietly

“Please let me listen to your stories again.”

Though she

barely opened her lips, they were aware that she could memorize, word for word,

their political talks.

She would

stare at empty spaces for a long time in the garden, when no one was there.

During the night, she would go missing from her room and wouldn`t respond to

the calls of her ladies in waiting.

When Ryuuki

searched for her, he would find her in the summer gardens or the corridors,

looking dejected.

“Are you

looking for Shuurei?” Ryuuki once asked.

She turned

to face him.

“Father

wants to go look for her, but I won`t search for Mother. I`m looking for a

different person”, she mysteriously replied.

Although he

didn`t understand who she was speaking about, Ryuuki realized that she had

understood his hidden desire. He picked her up and carried her back.

After some

more time had passed, when she was about seven years old, she made an unusual

request.

“I want a

birdcage.” She had drawn a picture of a cage.

“Just the

cage? What about the bird?” he asked.

“I think

I`ll try to catch one myself”, she responded back in writing.

He had

expected a sparrow, or a pigeon. What he found in the silver bird cage prepared

in his office however, was a jet black crow. He almost hit his head on a pillar

when he saw it.

A crow! Not a small bird, but a huge

crow. How did she even catch it…?

“The crow

flew into the cage,” was all she would say.

It wasn`t

cute at all. Ryuuki, would sit and his desk and work, stupidly feeling as if

the bird was staring at him critically. He couldn`t calm down. He remembered

this intimidating feeling from somewhere… When he met the crow’s eyes, the

image of a twenty year old, black haired man would come to mind. A haughty

expression with sardonic eyes, a man dressed in the fashion of a previous time.

Although

Ryuuki knew no such man, when he met the bird`s gaze, he remembered something.

The black

crow would stare back, then turn away.

“He`ll bite

your fingers off.”

Chouka payed

no heed to Ryuuki`s warning, and put her fingers through the lattice of the

bird cage. The bird simply ignored her as she stroked its black feathers.

But some time

later, Ryuuki came back to his office and saw Chouka, crest fallen, standing

alone before the empty cage.

At first he

thought it had escaped, but then he noticed that the cage door was still

locked. It looked like the crow had simply vanished like smoke from the locked

cage.

For the

entire day, Chouka was depressed to a surprising extent.

That bully like bird is gone. What a

relief! Ryuuki

thought, but he definitely

couldn`t say something like that when looking at her.

Chouka stood

in front of the locked cage, thinking. She placed water and food inside the

cage and unlocked the cage. Although the crow was no longer there, the door would be found

open and the water level would decrease. At such times, Chouka seemed faintly

happy.

The windows are all closed, so why

is the cage half open and the water gone…? Ryuuki would

wonder.

But it seemed that Chouka was mysteriously unconcerned

with such things.

Sometime after this incident, Shuurei`s old ladies in

waiting began to teach Chouka how to play the erhu, but she just couldn`t play

it very well. Seiran and her older brother Riou were slightly disappointed.

Ryuuki

wasn`t particularly disappointed when he heard. However, the person in question

holed herself up in her room, practicing the erhu so her father could listen.

Late one night, Chouka came knocking on

Ryuuki`s chamber door, with tears in her eyes. The most startling thing was

there was a single crow accompanying Chouka, almost like a chaperone. They both

entered Ryuuki`s chamber.

It can`t possibly be the same crow

that was inside the cage… Ryuuki

thought.

He couldn`t

bring himself to drive the bird away, so he composed himself and welcomed it

inside along with his daughter.

Chouka haltingly

played her child sized erhu. Ryuuki and the crow listened until the end.

Ryuuki`s

wife Shuurei had been an excellent cook, but her father Shouka`s tea was said

to be disgusting. But he loved Shouka, and it would be sad when he would no

longer be able to drink his horrible tea.

“It`s bad,

but it would be sad if I couldn`t listen to it ever again”, Ryuuki said

in response to his daughter`s playing.

Chouka

hugged the crow tightly and kissed its feathers, almost as if she was thanking

him.

“It`s

covered in germs…”, Ryuuki protested quietly. The crow flashed his talons, and

Ryuuki imagined how painful it would be to be stabbed by them.

Chouka would

only practice her erhu in front of Ryuuki. Every day he would listen to the

sound of her poor playing. Within the gray world he walked in, he was sometimes

able to smile.

Other people

saw her as a replacement for Shuurei. But to Ryuuki, just like there was only

one Shuurei, there was also only one Chouka.

He

accompanied her erhu with his koto, balancing his time between her and his

work. And thus things began to return to normal a bit.

She didn`t

play purely for Ryuuki`s sake (there

were times when she really didn`t want to let anyone hear), but sometimes she

made exceptions.

On the day

when they were no longer able to drink Shouka`s horrible tea, she sat beside

Ryuuki in mourning and played her erhu for him, more skillfully than she had in

the past, until the strings broke.

Just like

that, the days went by as the moon cycled and the seasons changed.

Ryuuki and

Chouka didn`t change very much themselves, but gradually the atmosphere

surrounding them did.

As Chouka

became older, the ladies in waiting would stubbornly insist that she

shouldn`t go to the outer court.It

became a concern that she would be exposed to the ridicule of the palace

officials.

“She`s

nothing like her mother.”

Around that

time, she suddenly understood the other meaning of words that were once uttered

by an official.

“It seems

like she can`t speak.”

“She`s

strange too. She walks around outside in the middle of night.”

“Isn`t her

intelligence

rather lacking as well?”

“Her mother,

Kou Shuurei, was considered one of the top officials. In comparison, she`s a

disappointment.”

“But it`s

good that she`s obedient.”

“The current

heir to the throne is Prince Riou, but if one were to wed Princess Chouka

there`s a possibility that they would be in line for the throne…”

Her older

brother Riou and the aides [Shuuei, Kouyuu, and Seiran] were outraged by the

rumors, but Ryuuki didn`t particularly do anything about them.

To an

outsider, when compared to Sai Rin and Jyuusan-hime who had power in the

imperial court, or Shuuran who was quickly moving up the ranks to promotion,

the silent Chouka was no match.

While it

would

have been easy for Ryuuki or Riou to grant

their wishes by say, revoking permission for Chouka to come to the outer court,

Ryuuki knew there was no way he could ever give such an order with his own

mouth.

Although he

didn`t order it, gradually Chouka`s ability to freely wander around was reduced.

The princess was given old ladies in waiting, women in their fifties and sixties, and the restrictions grew every

year. She was accompanied by an official or lady in waiting at all times, and the people she could

meet with were carefully selected.

Seiran,

Shuuei and Riou argued that the ladies in waiting were being too strict, but

Ryuuki didn`t get involved.

There were

very few who could catch a glimpse of the princess around the palace.

Speculations and rumors about the princess flew around the court and outside

the palace as well.

There was

still no new consort or concubines welcomed into the palace. The young Emperor

who had lost his Empress, was himself unaware of the talks of marriage. Over

ten years had already gone by.

The imperial

court assumed that there would be no children of the Emperor`s lineage other

than Chouka. The single imperial princess`s betrothal became a topic much

speculated about in court.

Although

bumpy at times, Ryuuki`s reign continued.

And Chouka

became fifteen years old.

Notes:

Translation:

I`ve decided to leave Sentoukyuu untranslated. Enlightened Ones Cave just sounds weird to me.

There`s a really abrupt switch in the novel in this section, when Ryuuki starts talking about Shouka`s tea. I literally re-read it like three times to make sure I didn`t miss anything. I rearranged a few lines in this section to make the transition less abrupt. Basically, while listening to Chouka play, he`s reminded that sometimes we enjoy horrible things our loved ones make or do, simply because we love them. I hope that came across clearly.

Reaction:

Oh Shouka, you were just too good for this series. I still can`t believe you were just killed off like that.

Chouka, you`re fucking weird and I love you. Now I understand why all the spoilers I read for this series talk about how ~mysterious~ you are.

(Ps. I know there`s not really any one who does art for this series anymore, but I would kill to see fanart of Chouka doing all this weird shit, and Seiran and company being like `wtf?` while Ryuuki`s just chill.)