Chapter 2

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The Sea of Clouds Imprison the Heart

Chapter 2

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“Here, open up.”

“Qingyun, I can do it myself.”

Fang Xiao Zai said as he reached over to feel for the bowl and chopsticks, only to grab a fistful of air instead.

Ever since Fang Xiao Zai lost his sight, Ye Qingyun stayed by his side, almost 24 hours a day, helping him with his daily needs.

Ye Qingyun’s extremely meticulous care made Fang Xiao Zai very uncomfortable. However, it was only because his sense of hearing and smell was so much more sensitive than before. It was such, that even the tiniest movement or the softest sigh made by the other party wouldn’t be missed. Whether it was changing his clothes or feeding him, the other person’s smell invaded his sense of smell, boldly and arrogantly, just like the person himself.

His hand, which was carefully exploring the table surface, was grabbed by a large, coarse hand that had a warming temperature. A bowl was then placed into his hand and a pair of chopsticks was passed to his other hand. “You wanted to eat by yourself, I’ll see how you eat,” said the other party, in a tone tinged with readiness to watch him make a fool of himself.

Fang Xiao Zai wanted to adjust the way he held the chopsticks, not knowing that the chopsticks would slip from his hand and fall onto the table. He felt for the chopsticks and picked them up, but didn’t know where to place the chopsticks.

“In front of you is a bowl of bamboo shoots and roasted meat, next to it is a plate of stir-fried vegetables, on the left is steamed fish…” Ye Qingyun’s voice traveled over.

Fang Xiao Zai poked the bowl of meat in front of him and tried, several times, to pick some up, but the meat continually slipped off. Hence, he decided to give up on that dish and moved on to the dish next to it, but the result was the same. He tried a few times, but it ended in failure.

Fang Xiao Zai was feeling slightly depressed as he placed the bowl and chopsticks down.

He heard the sound of a chair moving, and the smell from Ye Qingyun’s body slowly crept over.

“It’s fine.” The others deep voice rang by his ears, following which, a hand belonging to the other person patted his head, “I’m not treating you as a handicapped person, so don’t always put up a strong front.”

Fang Xiao Zai had once seen this man kick a subordinate in anger, causing him to be crippled. He’d also seen them return from “doing business” looking as if they’d bathed in blood. However, in front of him, this man was gentle, almost as if he was a completely different man and that made him a little afraid.

Fang Xiao Zai nodded and heard the sounds of his bowl and chopsticks being picked up.

“Just let me feed you, or you’ll probably only finish eating tomorrow morning.”

Just as he was speaking, someone politely knocked on the door before reporting, “First-in-command, the people are here, they are all waiting for you in the main hall.”

“Great.”

The man’s peaceful voice answered, followed by the sounds of the bowl and chopsticks being returned to the table. Fang Xiao Zai “looked” in Ye Qingyun’s direction, slightly at a loss. He heard the rustling of the other’s clothes before he felt a tug on his arm. He was then pulled off the chair and guided out of the room, with the other still holding onto him.

“Let’s stop eating for now and go have a look.”

Fang Xiao Zai didn’t know what was happening and was pulled into the main hall by Ye Qingyun without knowing why.

There was the smell of blood; as well as the cries of women and children. When Ye Qingyun helped him step over the threshold, the somewhat noisy place became instantly quite. Fang Xiao Zai heard some people greeting, “First-in-command” and “Second-in-command”.

“Yinfeng, come take a look, among them, whose eyes do you like the most?”

Fang Xiao Zai stilled, not fully understanding Ye Qingyun’s words, and asked uncertainly, “Eyes?”

“How could I have forgotten? It’s fine, it’s fine.”

Ye Qingyun held his hand and lead him forward.

“You can’t see now, so I can only describe them to you… This person is about the same age as you, but I feel that his eyes look shifty, not good; these, are a little old, not good either; this is a woman, with a pair of seductive eyes, that I’m guessing you wouldn’t like; these… these aren’t bad. The eyes are big and bright, shiny like the stars in the sky…”

Ye Qingyun sounded as though he was choosing something. Listening to his description, Fang Xiao Zai gradually began to feel unsettled.

Pulling his hand free, he heard a child’s wail.

“You can’t see them, but you can feel them. This child’s eyes are big and bright, they would be just right for you to change to.”

“Qingyun, what are you talking about?” Fang Xiao Zai took a few steps back. He couldn’t see, but from the direction of the child’s cry, he could tell where Ye Qingyun was standing and he turned his confused eyes towards the other.

“Gouging his eyes out for you; I’ve heard of this method before and thought it’s worth a try.” Ye Qingyun said lightly.

Hence, the child let out an even more heart-wrenching wail.

Fang Xiao Zai heard a voice that seemed slightly old, begging Ye Qingyun, “If you want to take, take mine, he’s still young, how is he supposed to live in the future?”

“What would I want your eyes for? What should I do if they lose their sight in a few years?”

“Then, take mine, I’m still young!” the voice of another man rang out, “Take mine, I beg of you, let the child go. I’ll give you kowtows.” A series of thumps could be heard following the declaration.

“Qingyun…” Fang Xiao Zai shook his head, “I don’t want this, and I won’t allow you to do it, they are innocent!”

“Yinfeng, rest assured. Naturally, I wouldn’t have picked civilians. This family was in cahoots with the authorities in Qingzhou, scamming people from the countryside. When they realized that the incident was about to be exposed, they decided to escape, taking their fortune and family along with them. Would you say that this kind of person is innocent?”

“Their innocence isn’t something we can decide on; their punishment should be dealt out by the officers. Also, I don’t believe in this method of changing eyes.” Fang Xiao Zai said seriously.

The surrounding was once again unnaturally quiet; even the child stopped crying and Fang Xiao Zai knew that his words must have angered Ye Qingyun. He could even imagine how bad Ye Qingyun’s expression must be.

Burning, killing, stealing and taking, he has never interfered, but on this matter, he definitely won’t concede, “Either way, I’ll never agree to this!”

The hall was once again filled with a suppressed silence. Then, Fang Xiao Zai heard the sound of hurried and chaotic footsteps.

“First-in-command, the physician is here.”

“Mm!” Ye Qingyun hummed, “Come take a look. Among these people, whose eyes would be the most suitable for Yinfeng?”

“Qingyun!”

“Yinfeng, no matter what you say, I have already decided on it!”

Fang Xiao Zai was so angry that he turned, wanting to leave, when he heard Ye Qingyun order from behind him, “Hold him!” The subordinates standing by the side came up to him and grabbed him by the arm, one on each side, not letting him leave.

“Qingyun, listen to me, let them go!”

Ye Qingyun acted as though he couldn’t hear him speaking, only caring to urge the physician, “Quickly choose, if none are suitable I’ll send people to bring more over.”

A loud thud could be heard as the physician kneeled down, and in a quivering voice, answered, “First-in-command must know, this old me doesn’t know of this eye switching method at all and neither have I heard of it before.”

“Useless thing! Was I feeding you for nothing? Then who on this earth would know?”

“F-first-in-command, this old me also doesn’t know who would know of the eye-switching method…but…”

“It’s fine, just say it.”

“The second-in-command’s loss of sight wasn’t due to an external injury. My guess is, that the head injury from before has led to blood clotting in the brain and it worsened when he fell off the horse, causing the blindness. This old me can use the golden needle to help the blood flow; and together with the taking of boiled medicinal herbs, this old me believes that it’ll only take a couple of days for the blood clot to disperse and the second-in-command would be able to see again.”

“Are you sure?” Ye Qingyun was a little suspicious.

“Even though this old me can’t be totally sure, but the eye-switching method would require the use of a knife. It might be better to try this method first and, in case it doesn’t work, applying the eye-switching method then, wouldn’t be too late. It will also allow me time to look through some medical books to look for any previous cases.”

Fang Xiao Zai heard Ye Qingyun’s soft agreement and the grip on his arms loosened. Ye Qingyun ordered his subordinates to take those people away and following that, the sound of shoes scuffing against the floor approached him.

Fang Xiao Zai retreated in fear, but his shoulders were grasped by a pair of large hands and he was practically dragged away.

Ye Qingyun had no regard for his eyes, caring only about taking him towards the backroom. Fang Xiao Zai couldn’t remember the paths and was stumbling the whole way.

“Qing…Qingyun…slow down…ah!” He yelped as he tripped on the threshold and fell down onto the floor.

Feeling around, he sat himself up and felt that person’s presence slowly move closer to him. Fang Xiao Zai was a little afraid, his hands on the floor as he inched backward.

Ye Qingyun stood looking down at the frightened person in front of him.

He hated others speaking about morals and law in front of him the most. Had the officials not been in cahoots with the bandits, SuYe Manor wouldn’t have fallen to the point where there wasn’t anyone to manage it, where he’d had to step up and do it. He wouldn’t have had to break his brotherly ties with Yinfeng, leading them down two very different roads.

He tried not to think of the past and only occasionally, when he had a little drink on his own, thought of selected beautiful memories. However, this person touched on the taboo subject directly; the reproaching tone was almost identical to that of Luo Yinfeng’s from the past.

Ye Qingyun just looked at him in that manner as he walked over slowly, thinking, “Who do you think you are? I provided you with food and clothes, helped you to find a cure for your illness and yet you side with strangers, reproaching me in their stead…”

It might’ve been that Ye Qingyun’s imposing manner was too terrifying, so much that despite Fang Xiao Zai’s inability to see, he could still feel it clearly.

“Qingyun…?” he called out softly, with a hint of helplessness.

Ye Qingyun saw the specks of red markings left on the ground where his palms were and the violent anger that was bubbling in his heart suddenly dissipated a little.

He was just a normal person, it wasn’t wrong for him to think in that manner.

Ye Qingyun told himself in his head, and at that moment, his tone and expression as he reproached him, were indeed very, very, similar to Yinfeng… Ye Qingyun held the lower portion of his robe up, squatted down and pulled one of the other’s hand over with a slightly stiff movement.

Fang Xiao Zai felt his hand being picked up and was shocked by it. He tried to free his hand in fear, but the other party was stronger. Fang Xiao Zai could only admit his defeat and stopped resisting…

Fang Xiao Zai didn’t know what Ye Qingyun wanted to do, but he could clearly feel the person’s anger. The emotion Fang Xiao Zai felt wasn’t simply just anger, but more like he wanted to kill him. He was waiting for the other party to do it, but he felt as though a weak gust of wind had gently swept across his palm instead.

“Does it hurt?” Ye Qingyun’s deep voice sounded.

Fang Xiao Zai was stunned for a moment and he felt a faint, prickling pain coming from his palm, as though he was being pricked by needles. It was only then he realized that he’d probably scratched his palms when he tripped earlier.

“I-I’m fine.”

He wasn’t a child, who needed someone to blow on his wound after falling. Just as he was about to retract his hand, he felt something soft and wet come into contact with his palm.

The wet thing was wriggling, inch by inch, on his palm, inciting a series of itches. Fang Xiao Zai really wanted to retract his hand, but the grip around it tightened instead.

After some time, he heard Ye Qingyun spiting and understood that Ye Qingyun was trying to suck the contaminated blood out from the wound.

“Someone, bring the medical box over.”

Fang Xiao Zai pulled his hand back, “it’s just a small scratch…” The wet and cool feeling on his palm left him at a loss, not knowing what to do. He didn’t know where to place his hand, so he just kept it raised.

Ye Qingyun suddenly felt that his expression was interesting, and the earlier unhappiness dissipated at the sight of the anxious expression of his that makes people want to laugh. Once again, he pulled on the injured hand forcibly to check for any sand or stone left in the wound.

“Sorry…” Ye Qingyun said softly. He didn’t actually think that he was in the wrong, corrupted officials should be killed, but he was willing to accept this person’s corrections. Just like when he was young, as long as he did something wrong, Yinfeng would always righteously correct him in the same way.

Hearing the apology, Fang Xiao Zai couldn’t help but be stunned. He couldn’t see the person’s expression, but he could sense the sincerity from the tone and so, the initial nervousness and fear that lingered in his heart, slowly dispersed.

“Qingyun, I know that you caught those people for me, but I really can’t accept that method…”

“If you aren’t willing, then we’ll try another method…”

The male voice was low and gentle. It almost had Fang Xiao Zai thinking that the earlier aggression belonged to another person.

“If this method won’t work then we’ll try another… eventually, there will be a way to cure your eyes.” Ye Qingyun said as his large hand landed on his head, rubbing gently like he had done in the past.

“Then release them.”

Ye Qingyun fell silent for a moment and with a gentle voice agreed, “Fine, you take a rest over here, I’ll go and take care of some things.”

Fang Xiao Zai remained silent; his ears were filled with the sounds of him packing the medical box, followed by the sounds of footsteps leaving and the doors closing.

When he couldn’t hear footsteps anymore, he stood up and felt his way towards the door. Despite not being able to see, he looked out, with his hand on the door frame.

He’d always been a little afraid, but he didn’t know what he was afraid of. Hearing Ye Qingyun said that they were going to “do the business”, his heart panicked even more. He didn’t even want to touch the items obtained from “doing the business” always feeling that a bloody stench came from them.

He was supposed to be the second-in-command, and these were supposed to be things that he’d also done in the past…why was it, after losing his memories and forgetting his past, the same things became unacceptable?

The weight of guilt weighed down on Fang Xiao Zai and it was as though his chest was blocked by something, denying him the ability to breathe. Could this be a punishment from the gods, meant for him to repay and repent for all that he had done?

Who will save me…? Fang Xiao Zai screamed internally from the torture, who will…save him from the pain?

Sounds of footsteps in the corridor approached, Fang Xiao Zai could now tell if the footsteps belonged to Ye Qingyun. The approaching footsteps belonged to more than one person. The footsteps were slow and heavy.

“The weight’s killing me!” someone complained.

“Shh, tone down your voice! First-in-command instructed not to let the second-in-command find out about this.” Another person answered in a hushed voice.

“When did the first-in-command become so indecisive? After expending so much effort to catch them, now we even need to get rid of them…”

“It’s all because the second-in-command didn’t want that, with the first-in-command and the Madam doting on him so much, who’d dare not take his words seriously?”

“Eh? What reason do you think a person who had left so many years ago would have to suddenly return?”

“Who knows… it isn’t even sure if he’s the real deal. You know it too, don’t you? That when the Madam acts up, she doesn’t recognize anyone; and when she sees anyone who looks like the second-in-command, she would call out the second-in-command’s name. She was the one who picked him up. The first-in-command might have just gone along with her to appease her. He doesn’t remember anything anyway, so it wouldn’t have much impact.”

“It’s such a good thing, why didn’t Madam take me for her son?”

“With your dumb mutt looks, you still think of being the wild cat to replace the prince[1]?”

“Fang Xiao Zai held his breath, as he thought through the things they had said. A terrifying thought budded uncontrollably.

Was he… not Luo Yinfeng?!

He was shocked by the thought and when he’d snapped out of his thoughts, the subordinates were just walking by the room door. The faint scent of blood seeped into his nose and thinking back on what the subordinates had just said “expending so much effort to catch them”, Fang Xiao Zai panicked and pushed the door wide open.

“Stop there!”

The sound of the footsteps stopped immediately, and the silence was followed, not long after, by a few docile greetings of “second-in-command”.

“What are you all moving?”

“Not…nothing!” those people tried to cover up.

“So why is there the smell of blood?”

“That’s…he, he got injured.”

“Ah, yes, yes, I’m injured.”

Fang Xiao Zai disregarded their lies and interferences. As he moved forward and came into contact with the sack in their hands, the scent of blood grew stronger. He felt around, untying the sack and with trembling fingers, he reached into the sack…

Sticky fluid, hair, face, clothes, cold bodies…

Disgust immediately took over, his stomach churned and Fang Xiao Zai dashed to the side as he started vomiting. The intense smell of blood had sent chills and shivers down his spine.

They were the people who were in the hall…

Ye Qingyun might have agreed not to use the eye-switching method, but he had forgotten that Su Ye Manor would never allow people to enter or exit the place easily.

“Qingyun, where is Qingyun?” Fang Xiao Zai wiped the filth by his mouth with his sleeve and asked.

“First-in-command could be in the conference hall, with the other hall leaders…”

“Take me.” It was a tone that left no room for refusal.

The doors to the conference hall were slammed open.

The initially heated discussion inside cooled to a silence and Fang Xiao Zai could feel the stares gathering on him.

Ye Qingyun didn’t think that Fang Xiao Zai would barge in, covered in blood no less. He then turned to look at the two who brought him here and knew that he’d probably found out about his order to dispose of those few people.

“We will end the discussion here. You may all leave first.” No emotion could be heard from Ye Qingyun’s voice.

Fang Xiao Zai could hear the chaotic footsteps rushing past and the room was left only with the death-like silence. He heard his own nervous, short and quick breaths. The fists in his sleeves tightened and his nails sunk into the fine scratches on his palms, creating waves of pain.

A chair moved, and steady footfalls gradually approached. The subordinates, who had brought him over and were standing at the side, retreated only to bump into the door.

“Yinfeng, why are you covered in blood?” He didn’t wait for Fang Xiao Zai to reply and his voice turned towards the side, “you brought the second-in-command over?”

“First-in-command, y-yes…” the subordinate was trembling so hard that he couldn’t even complete his sentence.

“I made him bring me over.” Fang Xiao Zai said.

Ye Qingyun remained silent and, without saying anything else, sent the subordinate away. He heard the subordinate’s stumbling footfalls as he ran far away.

Ye Qingyun pulled him into the room and closed the door lightly, “You can’t see, so why are you still running around? If you were looking for me, just send someone to tell me and I would go to you immediately…” and he asked again, “How did you get blood on you?”

“…Why did you kill those people?” Fang Xiao Zai interrogated instead of answering his question.

“You know everything?”

“Why?” he repeated his question again.

“No reason, moreover, the family wasn’t made up of kind people. I’m acting on heaven’s behalf.”

“Still, that should be handled by the officials and not…”

“Enough!”

Ye Qingyun’s voice was cold. A gust of wind whipped past his ear and he heard the sound of something breaking with a snap. It was probably a punch to the door frame behind him, breaking the wood.

Subdued by the other’s demeanor, his voice died in his throat. The killing intent coming from Ye Qingyun surged and crashed onto him like waves, seemingly petrifying Fang Xiao Zai.

He had never “seen” such a scary Ye Qingyun. Even though he knew that that person was violent but more often than not, his speech and actions were gentle, capable of warming one’s heart. However, in this moment, just the imposing manner seeping off that person was enough to make him fear.

The punch that brushed past his cheek and landed on the frame behind him, was anger as well as a warning.

“Never speak of ‘officials’ in this manor ever again, and especially not righteousness or morals.” Ye Qingyun said with a deep voice.

The pressurizing, oppressive demeanor which made it hard to breathe moved and Fang Xiao Zai loosened his fist which was tightly clenched till then. He palm was sticky, but he didn’t know if it was from the cold sweat or the blood seeping out from the wound.

“Qingyun, I never understood. The manor has plenty of property, why must we carry out these businesses instead? Proper businesses and men from the manor, with proper management, will also be able to sustain…”

Fang Xiao Zai was also unsure of what he was saying, but these thoughts just surfaced in his mind, like an old habit.

He could guess the manor’s property status just from an abandoned accounting book and was also able to tell the shortcomings that existed in the manor from its expenses. It was like his instinct, despite Madam Su Ye telling him that he was supposed to well-versed in martial arts, he felt that he was more likely to be a… merchant!

He had stopped talking for some time, but didn’t receive any sign of acknowledgment or reply from the other person. Faced with pitch black darkness, the feeling of helplessness suddenly rose in his heart.

Fang Xiao Zai turned and felt for the door with his hand. He shouldn’t stay in the conference hall, he had no say in the manor and despite being called “second-in-command”, his identity was worse than that of a puppet. He neither had the authority, nor the right to question the actual decision maker, when he, other than the name, Luo Yinfeng, had…nothing.

He opened the door and a gust of cool wind blew into his sleeves, as though it was a surging feeling of despair.

The moment he opened his eyes, it was as though he was a newborn, but with the care and concerns of many, he felt comforted, despite feeling lost. Even when he lost his sight, he wasn’t as depressed. It was not that he wasn’t upset, but rather, he was suppressing those negative emotions. He believed that he would recover, that he would remember, and that he would be able to see again, but now, those things didn’t seem to matter anymore.

Instead, he was afraid, that if he was to regain his sense of sight, would he see the bloodshed again? If he was to remember everything, would he… become like them, treating this illegal business as a proper means of business?

“Where are you going?”

A pull on his arm and, without waiting for his resistance, he was already pulled back into the room by the other person. The door closed with force and he was pinned against the door.

Ye Qingyun’s hand was jammed against his throat, just a little more force and it would suffocate him. A chill traveled up from the bottom of his feet, he felt that this man might actually kill him.

“I hated your look of righteousness the most. It is as though whatever you were to do would be right and whatever we were to do would always be wrong. Don’t forget, your hands are also covered in blood, the number of people you’ve killed is no less than mine!”

The sentence shook Fang Xiao Zai violently.

What blood? What killing?

He used his unseeing eyes to look straight at the man in front of him.

Was what he said…true?

“Can you tell me clearly…? What was I… like in the past?” Fang Xiao Zai heard his voice trembling, he really couldn’t accept this reality.

However, there was only a sigh from the other party before the hand which was pressing on his throat was removed and the tone softened by quite a bit, “Forget it, and I hope that you’ll never remember it either.”

Could he have killed before? His hands were also soaked with blood…

“Qingyun, finish your sentence, who…who have I killed?”

However, the other person refused to answer, “Too many things happened today, I’m guessing that you must also be tired. Take a nap and when you wake up, this never happened.” It wasn’t to comfort him; his tone was cold, almost as though he was ordering him to.

To treat it as though nothing happened?

How was that possible?

“Qingyun, why won’t you tell me? You know that I can’t remember anything, so why won’t you let me know my past?”

There was no reply. Fang Xiao Zai turned and opened the door when Ye Qingyun’s cold voice came from behind him.

“Without my permission, no one in the manor will speak of it!”

The door was closed by the wind and the resounding bang shook him.

He didn’t even have the authority to find out about his past?

What is he, exactly?

When the door was closed by the wind, Ye Qingyun pinched his nose bridge, slightly upset and a little tired. He misspoke. What he had said to him had nothing to do with him at all. He just couldn’t control his emotions because they were alike…really, very much alike…

That person had also told him the same thing; even if the corrupted officials or black-hearted merchants were deserving of death, it should be handled by the officials and not to be randomly decided by him, Ye Qingyun.

The decisions that Ye Qingyun made, no one in Su Ye Manor would dare to go against, except for two.

One had already left the manor and the other…

The actual reason he hadn’t been willing to mention “Luo Yinfeng’s” past was because he didn’t want that person to be in another person’s shadow.

He was himself and Luo Yinfeng was Luo Yinfeng. Even though he knew that there were times where he was too caught up in the acting and unconsciously mixed them up; just like the moment when he was about to make a dash out of the room, or the moment when he would speak righteously… However, they weren’t the same person. It was only a short moment of confusion and he was quick to realize.

Ye Qingyun thought that maybe allowing him to stay as “Luo Yinfeng” was a mistake to begin with.

Translator: Yeong

Proofreader: Grumpykit

QC: Xiao

Xiao’s Comments: The way Ye Qingyun calmly described the eyes to Fang Xiao Zai, “This person is about the same age as you, but I feel that his eyes look shifty, not good; these, are a little old, not good either; this is a woman, with a pair of seductive eyes, that I’m guessing you wouldn’t like; these… these aren’t bad. The eyes are big and bright, shiny like the stars in the sky…” is so eerily creepy and I’m kinda loving it~!

Translator’s Notes:

[1] This came from a legend where a crown prince was swapped with a wild cat at birth. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consort_Li_(Zhenzong)#Legend

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