Chapter 62

Parsed with an automated reader. The content accuracy is not guranteed.

Chapter 62: Good Enough

Ji Yunhe was brought back to the courtyard in the center of the lake.

Once again, she was locked up. And this time the seal no longer allowed her hands to pass through.

She sure had a knack for making matters worse.

But Ji Yunhe had no remorse.

She would always remember the moment she stepped out of the window, the feeling of running wild across the frozen lake, and the exhaustion while lying on the ice looking up at the clear night sky. They were all so beautiful.

They gave her a taste of freedom.

And after that night, Ji Yunhe felt less regretful in general. Dropping dead one day was no longer a big deal. In fact, she even looked forward to it.

She studied the mark left on her ear by Changyi for days but still could not figure out its purpose, so she gave up.

She knew some demons liked to mark their territory, so maybe this thing on her ear just symbolized that she was now his property.

Although everyone would see it as such, Ji Yunhe did not accept it.

Just like how Changyi did not belong to Princess Shunde, Ji Yunhe also did not belong to Changyi.

She always belonged to herself, in the Demon Valley, in the Grand Master's house, and in this Cloud Garden.

Throughout her life, she had done many things outside of her will and was forced to make many choices. Some with sorrow, others in pain. She made it this far under the pulls and tugs of life.

But she never yielded to anyone.

When Lin Canglan used poison to control her, she plotted and planned to seize the antidote. And when Princess Shunde humiliated her and tortured her, she did not bend either.

She never stopped struggling against the hand of fate for the control of her own life, winning some and losing some, but never giving up.

She fought along the entire way.

Ji Yunhe looked at herself in the mirror. Her face was thin, her eyes were sunken, and her lips were pale. Her fight could be described as pretty tragic. In the past she had fought for life, now she wanted to try a different game.

She wanted to fight for death.

She wanted to decide when, where, and how she died.

To end her journey with pride and dignity instead of fear and panic.

Since Ji Yunhe had nothing to do all day, she spent all her time thinking about this matter. Designing, planning, calculating, and scheming, just like what she used to do in the Demon Valley. Except back then it was to protect herself and her friends.

In her current state, Ji Yunhe would definitely not be able to break through the new seal around the penthouse, so this was the only place she could die in. But it did not matter, everything was about give and take and her end goal was to die. As long as she could reach it, she was willing to make compromises over the location.

And for this goal, she only needed to boldly go forward with no reason to worry about the aftermath. After all, the aftermath was for the living to deal with.

The only problem was her goal conflicted with Changyi. He did not allow her to die.

Ji Yunhe rummaged through the room when she was alone, and found no weapons.

No cutting herself, no jumping off the building, and no starving to death because someone watched over her every meal.

Just hold her breath and suffocate?

She tried it. When she went to bed at sunrise, she smothered the blanket on her head and held it tightly with her hands. She grew stuffy in no time, but her hands also grew weak. She ended up huffing and puffing in deep slumber all day under the blanket.

Other than her nose feeling some discomfort when she woke up, everything else felt fine.

Ji Yunhe also thought about the beam on the ceiling. She could twist a rope out of the bed sheet, tie it to the beam and give herself a good old hanging.

Ji Yunhe thought this method was feasible, but she searched and searched and could not find the scissors.

Then she remembered… After she made a cloak and tried to run away, Changyi confiscated her scissors. Maybe a whole bed sheet could still work… She grabbed it and shook it in the air. But as the sheet drifted down, a gloomy face suddenly appeared behind it.

Changyi stood in front of Ji Yunhe with his hands behind his back and his face full of discontent.

The bed sheet fell limply to the ground.

"When did you... come in?" Ji Yunhe looked at the door. "The meal hasn't been delivered yet..."

Changyi ignored her question and asked suspiciously, "What are you trying to do now?"

"I..." Ji Yunhe shook the bed sheet a couple more times. "The sheet is a little dusty, so I'm giving it a shake."

"Done shaking?"

"Mhm."

"Put it back."

Changyi watched closely as Ji Yunhe laid the sheet back onto the bed in proper form, then he left with the same face full of discontent.

Ji Yunhe sat down, feeling a bit out of her depth. The fish now seemed to somehow know her every move. Good thing she had not accidentally revealed her intentions, else it would become much more difficult.

Apparently, she could not count on slow methods of death anymore.

Ji Yunhe rubbed her chin and breathed out in stress.

She looked at the charcoal pot burning in the room. A fire would not work either. The iceberg would get here before the flames even start.

But... Ji Yunhe looked at the fire and suddenly remembered a book she read while locked up in the Grand Master's prison. It documented many of the author's travels. Aside from astronomy and geography, it also contained some interesting encounters.

She vaguely recalled one of the chapters had written about a noble family in the north who used a special red charcoal for warmth. It was made of valuable wood and could burn for a very long time. However, the young men of the family often died early, and the women did not live long either. They suffered numerous diseases and the head of the household even died together with his wife in their sleep.

It was said that their faces were peaceful as if they were still dreaming, and there were no signs of suffering and fear. The local people believed either the house had bad feng shui or they were haunted by demons.

However, the author of the book later discovered that the tragedy was caused by the charcoal they were using and a lack of ventilation in the house. The author called it "charcoal poisoning".

The reason why Ji Yunhe remembered this so well was because she had a discussion with the Grand Master after reading the article.

Ji Yunhe said many people in the world did not understand demons so they were quick to place the blame, and how it was rare for someone to go to such lengths and uncover the truth.

The Grand Master smiled and said, "She was always very thorough."

At that time, Ji Yunhe felt great pity for him -- a man deep in love who did not end up with the woman he liked.

But now, as Ji Yunhe remembered this incident, she only felt joy and excitement.

The windows in her room were always tightly shut during the day, she could not open them even if she wanted to. Her weak body grew cold easily, so if she were to request some extra charcoal, including the valuable red ones, no one would suspect a thing. Not even Changyi.

Add a few more pots of charcoal, choke on them for a day, and pass away peacefully… No one would think there was any foul play. They would just think she died in her sleep.

This was literally the best way to go.

Ji Yunhe was delighted by the idea.

She sat down enthusiastically at the table and waited until the maid brought her meal, then asked for her to stay a while. When Changyi came, she asked him, "My room is too cold, this pot of charcoal isn't enough to warm my hands and feet. Bring me some extra pots?"

Changyi did not suspect anything and granted her request with a "mhm".

The maid received the order and was about to leave when Ji Yunhe stopped her. "Do you have any red charcoal in the courtyard? I've heard that's the best kind."

The maid respectfully replied, "Yes."

Ji Yunhe nodded. "Bring some over. It's getting colder and colder everyday."

The maid did not answer yes until Changyi nodded his head. Then she respectfully left.

Ji Yunhe looked at Changyi sitting across the table. He seemed busy with work today, and was frowning at a lengthy report in his hand.

Feeling her eyes on him, Changyi turned his head and saw her warm and gentle smile. His mood lightened a bit and his brows relaxed, setting the report aside.

"What is it?" he asked, his tone still cold.

"Nothing," Ji Yunhe said. "I just feel like you have become more and more authoritative. Compared to before, this is a significant growth."

Whenever Ji Yunhe mentioned the word "before", Changyi would instantly turn somber. He snorted coldly and picked up the report again. "Thanks to you."

Ji Yunhe smiled and took a bite of rice, then continued as if chatting about family matters, "But your face looks as beautiful as always. It even matured a bit compared to before."

The eyes shifted from the report to Ji Yunhe again.

Ji Yunhe was very well-behaved and orderly today. She took a bite of rice and a bite of vegetables, then slowly chewed them with no rush. Something felt strange to him, but he could not tell what.

After Ji Yunhe finished her food, Changyi put away his report and got up. Usually, she would urge him to leave right now because she saw his presence as a surveillance on her, and Changyi knew that very well.

But today, Ji Yunhe called out to him.

"Changyi."

She stopped him in his tracks.

He turned around and saw her smiling with a slight blush. He suddenly felt like he was looking at the girl back in the Ten Square Formation, next to the sinking pool. There, she held his hand with a smile when she jumped, looking so brave, beautiful, and full of temptation.

And now, he was seeing the same smile with the same mystery behind it.

"Changyi, you are the best, and most beautiful person I have ever known..."

His fingers tightened around the paper report.

She continued, "Also the most gentle and kindest person. Six years ago, if it hadn't been due to the circumstances, I probably would have liked you very, very much." She pretended to be relaxed. "And perhaps, I would have wanted to be that one and only companion of a jiaoren."

They stared into each other's eyes without any passion or aggression. Their silence was like a current deep under the sea, carrying their emotions away into an endless abyss.

The candlelight flickered, and Changyi thought he saw a glimmer of a tear inside her eye.

Then a blink restored the blackness of her pupils.

He calmly looked at her and said, "Considering the way things went, what's the point in saying this now?"

"I just wanted you to know."

"Okay, now I know."

Without further ado, Changyi turned and left.

The room fell into silence again.

Ji Yunhe sat in her chair and quietly waited for the maids to bring the red charcoal.

After a long time, the maids finally came. They put down the charcoal, cleaned up some more, then asked her, "Miss, is this enough charcoal?"

The red charcoal looked as attractive as the blushing cheeks of a sweet young lady. Even though it was winter, Ji Yunhe felt as if spring had just come and brought with it a sea of flowers in bloom.

Good enough, she had said what she wanted to say.

"This is good, this is enough..."

Proofreader: Gem