Chapter 80

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Chapter 80: Do Not Look Back

Lin Haoqing held up an old, yellowing book with his left hand and gently picked up a small, thin object with his right. He observed it thoroughly under the dim oil lamp and murmured to himself, "Wing of a cicada demon..." His focus was broken by a knock at his door.

He folded the object into the book and carefully stored it away before opening the door. "What is it?"

It could not be his demon slave, Siyu, knocking this late into the night. As expected, it was Aji.

In just half a month, Aji had already grown into a young lady. She looked no different from Ji Yunhe in the past, but her expression was less stern and decisive.

She stood in the moonlit night with her hair falling on her shoulders, and her arms tightly clutching a pillow. Her ears trembled on her head, seemingly restless and emotionally disturbed.

A Ji Yunhe without a past. She wore her heart on a sleeve, and her face reflected everything in her mind. Nothing like the old Ji Yunhe who lived under a constant act.

This was probably how she should be like without the experiences of growing up in the Demon Valley.

"Master..." She hugged her pillow and looked uneasy. "I had another dream."

"Come in first." Lin Haoqing opened the door wider for her to walk in. Aji placed the pillow onto Lin Haoqing's bed, sat on it, and wrapped his blanket around herself. "Master, it was the same dream. I saw myself inside that lake, surrounded by water. It was so cold..."

Lin Haoqing sat down at the table, poured a cup of tea and handed it to Aji. "It's just a dream."

Aji accepted the tea and shook her head. "No, it's strange… Sometimes I would have another dream, a different kind..."

"What kind?"

"I... also dreamed of a man with a fish tail. His tail looked so big and shiny, it's beautiful!" Aji said with her eyes glowing. Lin Haoqing thought about the day in that dungeon, when they first saw the jiaoren...

It really was a stunning tail...

Then she lowered her head and stared at the tea inside the cup. "But... he did not seem happy. He was floating in the water in front of me and looking at me. There were beads falling from his eyes and landing on my face..." Aji raised her hand and touched her cheek, as if she could still feel them.

Lin Haoqing looked at the silver pearl hanging on her neck.

"Just like this one!" Aji removed the pearl and exclaimed in excitement. "Master, you said this was on me when you picked me up. What is it? Is it the same as the ones inside my dream..."

Lin Haoqing walked to Aji, gently took the pearl from her hand, and put it back on her neck.

"Aji," he said, "this is called a pearl. There are thousands of rivers, lakes and seas among the vast world, and many, many pearls. This is just one of the most ordinary kinds. Your dream is also just a most ordinary one among countless dreams."

Aji asked again after a moment of silence, "Really? That's all?"

Lin Haoqing nodded. "That's all."

Aji looked at his eyes, and the two fox ears drooped down. "But..." She gripped the teacup in her hand. "Why is it that after the man with the fish tail appeared, I..."

Plop, a drop fell into the teacup.

Lin Haoqing froze, and Aji also froze. She looked up at him with eyes still clinging to a teardrop that had not yet fallen. It flickered under the dim light of the room.

Aji wiped the tear away. "I... I don't know why I feel so sad..."

Lin Haoqing thought for a long time, then finally said, "Eat something?"

A blink restored the blackness of her eyes. "Huh?"

Lin Haoqing turned around, rummaged through the room, and handed Aji a fruit. She immediately stopped crying and started to eat. Lin Haoqing smiled. "I have dreams too."

"Do your dreams also make you so sad?"

"Yes, but more complicated than sad..." Lin Haoqing said with a slow voice. "I dream of someone I used to hate very much..."

Aji was not a very proper audience. She interrupted him right away. "How much hate?"

Lin Haoqing looked at her and smiled. "Someone I wanted to kill the most in this world." His answer scared Aji a little, and she stopped talking. Lin Haoqing then continued, "But this person I dream of, all the things he did that I hated were for a reason. No matter what people do in this world, they always have a reason or two. There is no unwarranted good, and there is no unexplained evil..."

"Master... I don't quite understand."

The old Ji Yunhe would never say that...

Lin Haoqing gave her a pat on her head. The gods had taken away her memories and past experiences, and returned her to a most genuine self. But he could never go back again, and did not want to either.

"Anyway, no matter how much I used to hate that person, I do not hate him anymore. I even want to collaborate with him and accomplish something together. Aji, everything in the dream will pass. Once you wake up, you should let it go. Time will always move forward, and you shouldn't look back either."

"But how do I control my dreams? How do I stop myself from looking back?"

"Dream what you dream, just don't think about it anymore after you wake up."

Aji tightened her fingers around the fruit. She felt her master was right and she should do as he said. But... but why did the thought of forgetting the man with the long fish tail make her feel so sad again?

Seeing Aji was lost in thoughts once more, Lin Haoqing withdrew his hand and asked her in a pretend seriousness, "You have so much time to indulge in a dream, apparently you have learned all the techniques I've been teaching you?"

Aji scratched her head and fell for his distraction.

"Master, most of the spells you taught me were simple. Forming seals, drawing formations, I can do them all no problem! But... that... that face-changing one..." Aji looked at Lin Haoqing with some embarrassment. "I can manage to change my face, but it's always so awkward and uncomfortable. Any little loss in concentration would make me change back..."

Lin Haoqing was now really serious. "Other techniques are trivial, but the art of transformation, you must know," he said sternly. "Aji, this is the only way for you to live as you wish in the future. Your real face must not be seen by anyone other than me and Siyu. I told you to remember these rules by heart, have you forgotten them?"

His severity made Aji cower a little. "I remember... Never go to the Northlands, never go to the imperial capital, never show my true face, and never use my spiritual power..."

Lin Haoqing eased his tension a bit. "You are a nine-tailed fox naturally born with nine faces. The art of transformation should be your base skill. Practice well, and you will be able to control it."

Aji nodded. "But master... I am a demon, why do I have the spiritual power of a demon master? Sister Siyu is a sword demon and she doesn't have it. And master, you have spiritual power but no demon power…"

Lin Haoqing did not know how to answer her. Ji Yunhe had been refined by Lin Canglan into a demon, so she had both the power of the double pulse and a demon. And the demonic power inside her formed an inner pearl that all demons carried. As long as it remained intact, her demon side would not die.

Perhaps even Ji Yunhe did not know that she actually had two lives. One was her human body as a demon master, and the other was her inner pearl.

He took out her pearl from the frozen lake and nurtured it into a new body for her.

Only this time, she was no longer a human carrying the power of a demon, but a demon carrying the power of a double pulse. And her memories were left behind inside the old frozen body at the bottom of the lake.

Lin Haoqing did not explain this to the current Aji. He felt that since this was a new life, she should get a fresh new start as well. The complicated past was best to remain behind her.

After a long silence, Lin Haoqing said softly, "Aji, do not look back."

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