Chapter 51

Frida’s lips remained tightly closed, not even offering a word of greeting for his return. After a moment of being taken aback by the unexpected situation, the woman who couldn’t hide her true feelings responded with an unadorned reaction. Her lips, which clearly showed her disappointment, pouted forward, and her white cheeks puffed up in a huff. Then, as if suddenly feeling sad, the corners of her eyes drooped. Though she was upset and angry with him for leaving without a word, it seemed she didn’t want to scold him. Each of her responses made his throat tighten as if he had swallowed a hard lump. The wife’s conclusion about her husband’s long absence, without any prior notice or explanation, was ultimately one of resignation.

‘Yeah. It’s better to keep living like this. Don’t expect anything from a guy like me.’

He should have felt relieved, but... damn it. The shadow that didn’t suit her at all, covering the woman who didn’t fit in the shadows, bothered him. Taking a step back, the shadow moved away from Frida’s shoulders. He knew this distance was the best choice for both her and him, so he shouldn’t yearn any longer.

“I’m back.”

Upon hearing his brief greeting, Frida placed the design she was holding on the table and slightly bent her knees in a respectful bow.

“Welcome back, Duke. I’m glad you returned safely.”

The forced smile on the usually cheerful woman’s face appeared and disappeared. Though her hands were demurely clasped, her stubborn eyes betrayed her. Her pouting, sulky demeanor was endearing, and Daniel’s lips curved softly on both sides. During the two weeks he was away from the castle, Daniel often saw bright light even in the deepest darkness. Whenever he thought of Frida, his mind was always filled with a sunny spring afternoon. There were times when he reached out to catch the nonexistent sunlight. Looking at his empty hands, he felt more angry than bewildered. The next moment, he was surprised by the intensity of his longing for what he couldn’t hold in his hands. After his mother passed away, he had forgotten how to desire anything. Completely. He had erased it from his mind.

“Look closely, Daniel. What happens when you covet what is not yours. Your insignificant greed, which doesn’t know its place, has killed many lives.”

Thinking of the tragic outcome of the illegitimate son Daniel’s unrealistic desires was only natural. Daniel’s nightmares weren’t solely about his mother’s death.

“Master Daniel, you’ve grown taller. Next year, you’ll be able to wield a long sword without any trouble.”

Michael, the guard of the Duke’s family, who had two young sons, went missing. On the day of the incident, he had stepped in front of Margret, who was about to slap Daniel out of anger. Michael’s body was never found.

“Master Daniel, here. Candy. Since Lady Laura is out, I’m on my way back, so feel free to enjoy it. Hehe.”

Eva, the maid who took care of Lady Laura’s bedroom, was a playful girl who secretly gave Daniel candy. Eva, who had just turned twenty, died on the execution ground with her mother. She was executed for taking care of her mother, who had fainted while begging for Daniel’s life, without Margret’s permission. Innocent people died because of Daniel, because of his childish actions. To him, ‘desire’ was a word that inevitably led to someone’s ‘death.’ He realized that by not desiring anything, not giving his heart, and living like a dead person, he could save at least one more life.

‘If I don’t cross the line, the one on the other side won’t die either.’

During the past two weeks, he had repeatedly engraved this vow in his mind. Yet, standing in front of Frida this night, the vow was completely forgotten, and the urge to take a step and cross the line remained.

“It’s very late. It’s dangerous to be here alone at this hour.”

Her purple eyes, which lifted slightly, were quite rebellious. To control his slackening lips, Daniel bit the soft flesh inside his mouth.

“You don’t need to worry about the castle’s security. Lord Ricardo is protecting everyone more safely than anyone else.”

Frida, who had raised her head, glared at the unexpected visitor.

“I didn’t expect a guest so late at night, so I wasn’t prepared.”

“A guest. I thought I was the master of this castle, but it seems I’m not anymore.”

“That’s not what I meant...”

Her purple eyes flared up immediately. Anyway, she was a woman who always emitted some kind of light. To avoid laughing in front of the indignant Frida, Daniel looked down at the table. Dozens of papers with fabrics and uniforms spread out. He had noticed what she was doing this night as soon as he entered the kitchen. The task he had given to keep Lord Boiled busy had apparently kept Frida up all night. The entire castle was lit up late into the night, so he hadn’t expected it. She had said she was afraid of the dark, yet she was still moving around without getting tired at this hour. To stop her, he might have to order all the wall lamps to be removed. He knew it was absurd, but he really wanted to do it. Maybe it would be better to have a separate office built near the bedroom. That way, she wouldn’t have to come down to the kitchen and act like this. He decided to add one more task for Lord Boiled tomorrow and stepped aside politely.

“Let’s go back. I’ll escort you to your room.”

But instead of following him, Frida sat back down in her chair with a displeased look.

“Go ahead. I still have work to do.”

Daniel’s sudden appearance had left her flustered. Losing her composure, the colors of the designs on the table became a jumbled mess. Leaving without a word for a whole two weeks and then returning with just a “I’m back”?

‘Ha. I’m really at a loss.’

And what’s dangerous? The servants, worried about Frida, had placed lamps on the walls and stairs to brightly light her path. Lord Ricardo had promised that no wild animals or strangers could enter the inner castle. Seeing Daniel suddenly appear and pretend to be concerned about her, she felt a surge of irritation. Ignoring her when it suited him, but now showing unnecessary concern. Without realizing it, her breathing became heavier, and her grip on the paper tightened. As the tailor’s carefully drawn design crumpled in her hands, the paper with the black jacket design, which she had thought was ordinary, was placed in front of her.

“If the remaining task is to decide the color of the knights’ uniforms, use this.”

Frida quickly pushed the paper aside.

“I’ll handle it. You don’t need to worry about it, Duke.”

As soon as she finished speaking, he placed a purple fabric in front of her.

“This would be good too. It seems to be your favorite.”

“But...”

Of course, this combination was her favorite, but using purple would make the cost skyrocket. Pushing the purple fabric away, Frida suddenly changed her mind and gripped it tightly.

‘What’s the harm? I can spend this much for Lord Ricardo.’

Lifting her head, she saw the man looking down at her with an annoyingly calm expression. The Daniel from two weeks ago, who was far from calm and composed, overlapped with the current face.

“You are already my wife, approved by the royal family.”

‘My wife,’ he said, yet...

“Tell me if you want to do something else.”

Making her excited as if he would do anything, even kissing and touching her everywhere, yet now looking so indifferent as if he had forgotten all about it. Why? Why are you so unaffected? The nails of her clenched fist dug painfully into her skin. She wanted to create some kind of crack in that annoyingly indifferent face.

“I’ll make the entire cloak purple too.”

Do you know how much the price will increase with purple dye? With that, you could make uniforms for over a hundred knights. You’ll faint when you see the bill, probably.

“As you wish, my lady.”

His nonchalant acceptance made her even angrier.

“I mean, the entire uniform for the entire knight corps. Black jackets with purple embroidery, and all the cloaks will be purple. Over a hundred sets.”

Daniel nodded lightly again.

“Purple cloaks. They would suit the name of the knight corps well.”

Frida, who had been frowning, looked at him in confusion.

“The name of the knight corps? Lord Ricardo said he hasn’t decided on it yet.”

“I just decided.”

Daniel, leaning over the table, met Frida’s eyes.

“The Amethyst Knights.”

Amethyst? A gem? The unexpected beautiful name made Frida tilt her head.

“You mean the purple gem? The one found only in deep caves.”

“Yes, that’s right.”

Daniel’s lips gently touched Frida’s white eyelashes.

“They would suit your eyes well.”

His breath, low and warm, was the same as that morning when he left.

***

“Since it seems you’re done, shall we go back to your room?”

The way he calmly collected the designs on the table and placed them in front of her was so composed. If it weren’t for the lingering warmth on her eyelids, she might not have realized his lips had touched her. How could this man be so easy? Leaving, returning, and stirring her emotions.

“Just leave them.”

Her voice turned sharp out of disappointment. Frida hugged the stack of papers and moved to the end of the table, trying to distance herself from the man who was shaking her. Even though she had given him a clear hint to stay away, Daniel picked up the papers that had fallen and handed them to her.

“Would you like to have breakfast with me tomorrow morning?”

Daniel asked a somewhat impulsive question, unlike his usual self. He thought if he let her have a normal life, she might calm down.

“I want to share a simple, peaceful, and ordinary life. To have conversations, sit across from each other, and have meals together... that kind of life.”

A life full of laughter, peace, and simplicity. Things he believed were impossible for him. Things he thought he could never have, so he never even dreamed of them. But... why can’t I? If my woman, my wife, wants it. What’s so difficult about giving her such an ordinary life? Obstacles? Interferences? Can’t I just sweep them away? A piece of suppressed desire sprouted and grew. Even though he knew it was wrong. Even though he wasn’t a young boy anymore, he couldn’t stop his desires from taking over.

“After breakfast, would you like to take a walk together?”

“...”

Frida’s eyes, which had been wary of Daniel, suddenly filled with tears. It seemed she was deeply hurt by his sudden departure and lack of communication. Frida, hugging the stack of papers as if they were a lifeline, turned her gaze away.

“Why?”

Hearing her sulky question, Daniel stepped closer and stood in front of her. A tear, which she couldn’t hold back, rolled down her face.

“Why are you asking me this? You disappeared without a word and didn’t contact me for two weeks. Why now...”

After making her so excited and then turning cold, after rejecting her. Why are you making me feel this way by saying things like you suit the gem? Stop teasing me. Just as she was about to get angry, Daniel’s rough, calloused hand cupped her cheek. The tears that couldn’t fall gathered in his hand. He didn’t like seeing her in the shadows, but he liked her tears even less. No matter how beautiful her tear-filled eyes were.

“Would you believe me if I said I regretted leaving you behind?”

Because light suits my woman.