Chapter 11 of 29

Chapter 11

20 min read4,885 words

What is the relationship between this衰男 (useless man) and me?

Probably, it's already hard to say clearly.

For a period of time, we were companions on adventures, and then for more time, we were the relationship between a hero and a demon king. Of course, the longest-lasting relationship was that of a jailer and a prisoner.

Now the jailer says he is tired and old, and doesn't want to do it anymore, but he plans to hand over the prison to the prisoner?

"What a joke!! You want to hand over this city to me, a lich? To me, the demon king who almost destroyed the world? Don't be ridiculous!"

Adam smiled bitterly.

"I also think it's unreliable, so who do you think I can hand it over to?"

Indeed, who? As a red dragon, Xiao Hong fits her racial characteristics well—eating, sleeping, and playing when she wakes up, and then sleeping again when she gets tired... But if she were to be the mayor, she would probably sell the city for gold by the next day.

What about the last of the three great figures, the sage Margaret? She is shrewd and well-learned, and should be a suitable candidate.

"Margaret is the first choice, but she said no."

Of course, others wouldn't do it. She has already spent over a hundred years of her youth here. Now, you, this blockhead, not only don't understand, but also plan to sacrifice yourself for love across time, and then dump your responsibilities on others. Margaret didn't beat you up, which is already very restrained.

Looking at the man in front of me with a sour face, I couldn't help but feel angry. How could a girl as good as Margaret fall for this idiot?

"Damn, if I had a girl as good as Margaret who liked me..."

"Ha ha." Adam laughed smugly, a laugh that made me want to punch him in the face.

"Damn, you've already beaten me."

Alright, actions speak louder than words. Since I've thought about it, why should I hesitate? I'll give this handsome old man a black eye!

Then the two of us continued to fight, but ten seconds later, due to the disadvantage of my profession, I was once again subdued by force. When he sat on my spine and started to break my leg bones, I had no choice but to tap the ground in surrender.

"Stop! My bones are about to break, they're about to break! Really, they're about to break! Damn, if I were still a paladin..."

"Alright, speak, will you take over or not!"

"No! I've finally served my time, and I have my own things to do. You want to use the position of warden to bind the prisoner? What a joke!"

"Prison? Even now, you still see this city, which we built with our hearts and souls, as a prison? Are you willing to see it become a vassal of other dungeon lords due to the loss of its protector?"

"Of course..." I was about to say, "Of course it's a prison, who cares," but halfway through, I hesitated.

Do I really see the city I spent over a hundred years building with my own hands as a shackle? I must admit, in my long life, the days in Sulfur Mountain City were the most pleasant.

A city with a mix of races, no major wars for decades, and a peaceful and prosperous people. This unique city is probably unlike any other city on the continent of Eish. We built it bit by bit.

"Alright, letting these greedy pigs take over our hard-earned jewel is indeed annoying. So, what do you want me to do? Don't tell me to be the mayor. You know I have my own things to do and don't have the energy. Just get to the point."

He understands me, and I understand him. He should know that I can't accept the role of mayor. Perhaps, his current rhetoric is what Margaret prepared, a strategy to make me accept something.

"Ha ha, indeed, just as Margaret said. Since neither of us can continue to be the mayor, why not hand it over to the next generation?"

"Next generation? We are all bachelors, where is the next generation? You mean..."

"Yes, Ann, my disciple, your rumored girlfriend, the red-haired Ann, has returned."

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Ann, an orphan, is... probably around seventeen or eighteen years old now.

Don't look at me like that. She is an orphan that Adam adopted. The last time I saw her was seven or eight years ago. Liches are not very sensitive to the passage of time, so it's good that I can even guess her age.

As for the "rumored girlfriend" thing, it's just a joke. Back then, she was still a little girl, and when she saw us two complaining about not having girlfriends, she said she felt sorry for me and would marry me when she grew up. So, the lich Roland, who had a necrophiliac girlfriend, became a recurring joke.

"Don't joke around, hand it over to Ann?? Are you sure Sulfur Mountain City will still be standing the next day?"

What kind of person is Ann? Let me describe her in one sentence: a brat! The most mischievous brat in this world!

The first time we met, I was applying oil to my bones. It was a high-end product mixed with salt marsh snake cow fat. I was happy that my skull was shining when...

"Ha, goal!"

A loud voice with a child's pitch, the scenery in front of me flew back, and the view kept spinning. That day, I learned that even liches can get dizzy if their heads spin too fast...

Later, my head flew a few miles away, and my headless body scared countless passersby. I found my head in a trash can...

Even without a sense of smell, I was thoroughly disgusted by the garbage and bugs that afternoon.

It turned out that six-year-old Ann was obsessed with the "soccer" I "invented." Her favorite thing was to follow her instincts and kick anything round, whether it was a trash can or a cat or dog on the street, with a loud shout.

A lich's skull is round, and my polished head looked a lot like a white ball...

I'm not a petty person and wouldn't hold a grudge against a child, but it seemed that she fell in love with the "feeling" of a powerful kick.

"Those leather balls are for women to kick; they fall apart with a little force. Uncle Bone's skull is full of magic, much more interesting than those boring balls. Kicking it feels so good."

From then on, I deeply detested that brat's innocent and childish smile.

What was even more unbelievable was that her attacks were not only unpredictable but also completely without malice. Most of my protective spells were triggered by malice... So, those days before I rewrote my protective magic were truly unbearable.

Every time we met, it became a disaster.

During those days, I would often hear that characteristic greeting, "Hi! Uncle Bone," and then the view in front of me would fly back, the world would spin, and I would end up in a hole...

I started to hate brats from that day on.

Later, when percussion and rappers became popular, this brat somehow heard that bones with magic were the best material for magic drumsticks, which could create a magical resonance effect that would electrify the crowd...

The best magical bone material, besides dragon bones, was the ultimate undead—lich.

Well, her band "Skeleton Rock" did shock the city, but I couldn't be happy being praised for the sound of my ribs as an instrument.

When she heard about ice castles and the Frosty Mountains from storybooks, she had the brilliant idea of a bone-themed sculpture art exhibition.

"We don't have ice here, only sulfur... But sulfur is toxic, and we are the famous City of the Undead. Let's use the undead for sculptures! My artistic cells are burning."

When this girl left the city to wreak havoc in the world, the whole city was in a frenzy, and the most excited were probably the undead in the eastern district who had been tormented by her.

Headless knight polo matches, skeleton dance contests, banshee's "I Am the King of Singers"—she had no normal person's fear of the undead. The entire eastern district became a death-themed amusement park for the dead.

However, the current undead tourism theme originated from this idea. The plan to "revitalize the economy of Sulfur Mountain City with undead tourism" has become a reality.

"Don't say that. Although Annie is mischievous, isn't it her mischief that has brought the undead closer to other citizens? Don't you think that to lead this city, one needs not just ability but also a fair and equal view of the citizens? In this aspect, Annie is the best."

"Hmph, did Margaret tell you that?"

"Ha ha, I think so too. If she didn't have enough popularity, how could everyone follow her in her mischief?"

".... As a leader, having only a bright side and popularity is not enough. Behind-the-scenes tactics are also necessary. So, you and Margaret's idea is to help her?"

"As long as she gets on track, it won't take long. And if you think she's not doing well, you can always take over. After all, there's no one who can stop you."

Adam laughed smugly. "Besides, little Annie is your fiancée, so helping her is only natural."

But I didn't answer. I was originally going to refuse, but a sudden situation disrupted all my plans.

At that moment, a golden panel appeared in front of me.

"Ding! Congratulations, host, you have triggered a selectable epic-level task, Phoenix Rebirth."

"Task requirements: Investigate and resolve the crisis in Sulfur Mountain City, and before Adam dies, cultivate Annie Levin into a capable leader."

"Task reward: Epic-level discount coupon (50% off any item in the system store below epic level), and the qualification to start the main storyline mission."

"At least... before leaving your hometown, entrust your home to a reliable person. You wouldn't want to come back to a pile of ruins, would you?"

"Task failure penalty: Turn you into a mushroom-covered skull? Or a mushroom with a skull head? Neither is good? Then a mushroom-headed skull it is."

In the past, I have also triggered this annoying system's sudden tasks, but they were often about killing a certain number of creatures and getting some unreliable title. This is the first time it's been so serious.

But now, I was attracted by its reward, "the qualification to start the main storyline mission." It was easy to understand; the game's main plot was finally unfolding. The main storyline mission is probably the historical events that the player experiences, the seven invincible Hell Raids.

This was expected, and the other reward was very tempting.

"Discount coupon? If I can buy a body at half price, can't I resurrect earlier?"

But then another task appeared.

"Ding! Congratulations, host, you have triggered a selectable epic-level task, The Lich King Returns (why do I have to say 'again'?)"

"Task objective: Whether it's a dark god or a conspiracy, make them tremble before the Lich Lord. Absolute power may not solve everything, but it can at least solve the protesters. Become the mayor as soon as possible, rebuild the Eternal Night Legion, and make the living fear the undead plague again."

"It's time to get those lazy bones in the eastern district moving. If they keep this up, the eastern district will truly become an undead theme park. They are almost forgetting the honor of the Night Wolves of the East."

"Task reward: The qualification to start the Lord System and the continent conquest storyline, and a perfect demigod-level lich body."

"Task failure penalty: Honestly, you, a thousand-year-old mischief-maker, are unparalleled in the world. I can't think of any reason why you would fail."

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