Chapter 59

EP.59 A Saint Everyone Would Like to See

The atmosphere in the room was completely warming up as the chat continued from the question about whether she had gone to the team's gathering for the competition.

Thanks to that, I also got a bit excited.

Just imagining that moment makes my heart swell.

The day I realized that building relationships with people could make me so happy.

The day I discovered a lotus blooming in the mud.

A precious memory from a rainy day.

[Room Manager: Really, really cute;;]

[It’s just flattery, you idiot.]

[Do you believe it?]

[(A rough clip of a monk joining his hands in prayer)]

[Seho, are you falling for it again? Hahaha]

[Is this a gathering of non-believers? Hahaha, just believe it. Hahaha]

[Really, you don’t believe it at all. Hahaha]

[Just saying that, but you must be really looking forward to it. Hahaha]

[Room Manager, turn on the camera… (6th try)]

[Are you guessing right? Everyone says you should hear it directly.]

[No response from the Room Manager.]

[You don’t want to, huh?]

[If you pay, why wouldn’t you want to?]

[You should leave.]

『Mr. Mania』 donated 10,000 won!

There’s a competition next week, do you have any intention of participating?

[Didn’t the competition already happen last time?]

[Why another one?]

[No, no, this is a 1v1 match.]

[There was a 1v1 match in this game?]

[It was added much later, so it’s not very popular. Hahaha]

[There was even resistance to 1v1 matches in a game that gained popularity with 6v6 matches. Hahaha]

[As a healer, how can I leave? Hahaha, do you have any thoughts?]

[Why not just do something else?]

[I’m not participating. Hahaha]

[Clay Pot Killer ON]

[Staff that turns the opponent into a dog ON]

[Even now, thinking about it, Jin-tae was so pitiful. Hahaha]

[I’m just envious.]

[What?]

[F**k, I’m ready to be hit like a dog and bark. Why not me?]

[That’s just bragging. Hahaha]

1v1 match competition.

There’s such a thing?

“I don’t really want to participate.”

My main role has always been a healer with poor PvP skills, and I’m a bit burdened by the preparation for the competition.

It would be difficult to win against people who have been grinding their skills.

As a main commander who can instantly grasp almost all situations on the battlefield and relay them to teammates, my abilities would inevitably fade in a 1v1 match.

And, as a long-time Rethe player, I honestly don’t want to participate in such a shallow match.

『PepsiColaIsTheBest』 donated 20,000 won!

By the way, you’re really good at drinking, right? How much can you drink?

“I drink moderately.”

[Why suddenly talk about drinking? Hahaha]

[When someone says that, they’re usually really good at drinking.]

[You’re a good drinker, sis. Dang.]

[You’re so cool, so let’s drink together. Haha]

[Just get her really drunk and then what?]

[What do you mean, then what?]

[Just want to pet her head a lot.]

[Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha]

[What’s that supposed to mean? Hahaha]

[Why are you so timid? Hahaha]

[You guys are perverts.]

『SomeoneWhoAsksPointlessQuestions』 donated 50,000 won!

Do you have any dating experience, teacher?

It’s important…

[What’s so important? Hahaha]

[You’re really serious. Hahaha]

[It’s important!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[Oh my.]

[Oh, it’s not really important. Hahaha, just a bit curious. Hahaha]

[Just say what you really think. Hahaha]

[I’m really curious, teacher…]

[Why?]

[While watching the stream, I’m trying to feel like I’m in a virtual relationship…]

[Ah… Ah…]

[Why are there tears…]

Dating experience?

Who are you kidding.

“Didn’t I mention it last time?”

I said I’ve been single all my life.

Of course, I was confident.

With a body like this, if I tried to seduce someone,

they would definitely fall for me, no matter who they were.

With a body and face like this.

But I don’t like that.

Even though I think it’s what people who can’t date usually say, I want to meet someone who likes my inner self more.

“…”

And that is inevitably impossible.

This isn’t just a thought from my usual self-deprecation.

It’s as natural as a pebble next to gold losing its luster.

To me, the saint’s appearance is gold, and my inner self is just a pebble.

Who would look at my inner self instead of my outer appearance?

While the dichotomy of judging a person by their appearance and inner self isn’t good, it’s inevitable.

Moreover, I’m incredibly greedy, always craving attention and love but not knowing how to give it.

I want everyone to adjust to me, and I want all their thoughts to be about me, but I don’t want to care about them in return. It’s a selfish thought I always have.

There’s no way someone like me could have a normal relationship.

Even if it’s just getting to know someone, my messed-up nature would eventually show, but in a romantic relationship, it would definitely be an obstacle.

The other person would surely be disappointed, and I would be hurt by that.

That’s not something I want.

Am I overthinking this?

Actually, dating is just something simple, not something to seriously worry about,

and it might be something that you have to experience, break through, and polish to eventually achieve.

But I don’t like that.

I don’t like the process of having to break through.

Why do people put themselves through such pain?

Even if it’s natural and inevitable,

I don’t think it’s necessary to live well.

So, the conclusion is, about dating,

I want it more than anyone, but it’s also burdensome, unpleasant, and annoying.

After organizing my thoughts, I said,

“I’ve never dated and don’t plan to.”

[100 points… 100 points…]

[Textbook answer. Hahaha]

[But I like it.]

[At your age, you should try dating…, sigh, tsk…]

[Why are you causing trouble here, old man?]

[The Room Manager said she’s not doing it.]

[Stay single until you become a pro player, sis…]

[You guys are too much. Hahaha]

[But when will the Q&A end? I want to see the game.]

[If you answer, the money will multiply. Would you play the game if you were her? Hahaha]

[F**k]

『AttackTwice』 donated 10,000 won!

So, when are you going to turn on the camera?

With so many people curious about me,

the topic changed in an instant.

The atmosphere in the chat, which had turned pink with talk of dating, also changed accordingly.

Camera.

“I don’t plan to turn it on anytime soon.”

I’m not mentally prepared for that yet.

Especially, this appearance would be too shocking for my game stream viewers,

unless they are incredibly interested.

[Not anytime soon?]

[Does that mean you’ll turn it on eventually? Hahaha]

[Thank you, I’ll be waiting for that day. Thank you.]

[Room Manager, I’ve seen a few of your game clips, and you’re really good, especially your aim is a hundred times better than mine. I don’t know how you’re still in Yellow.]

[What’s with this sudden nonsense?]

[Just a chat fest. Hahaha]

[Oh, Hahaha, does that even make sense? How can a priest struggling in Yellow be better than a pro trainee? Hahaha]

[This is 100% fake, but it’s still fake.]

[Room Manager… Do you know? If you’re annoyed, turn on the hand camera.]

[Turn on the hand camera and then ‘accidentally’ change the camera position to show your face.]

[‘Clearly just a game player, but coincidentally the camera shows your face with makeup and lenses on.']

[‘Sniff, sniff, I was about to go out, so I’ll end the stream abruptly.']

[‘After all this, I’ll start streaming with the camera on from now on.']

[From then on, the Room Manager will make a fortune…]

[Is this the promised plot twist? Hahaha]

[All the same pattern. Hahaha]

[The same pattern, but it never gets old…]

[Already looking forward to it. Hahaha]

[So, just start with the hand camera.]

[Thinking about it, the Room Manager seems to be using hacks… Hand camera ‘please’.]

[Quickly edit the game clips to look like hacks and spread them in the community. Hahaha]

[You guys are really despicable. Hahaha]

What’s this?

I don’t plan to do a hand camera anytime soon, and even if I did,

common sense tells me that the camera position wouldn’t accidentally change to show my face to the world.

That’s something that only happens in novels or manga.

Anyway, a lot of time has passed.

As a dedicated gamer, I was starting to want to play.

So, I hinted at it.

“I’ll take one last question and then play the game.”

Despite saying that,

no one was asking questions I could answer, probably because they were still imagining the buildup from the hand camera.

The question about how many burgers I can eat just wouldn’t go away.

Their enthusiasm was so great that

I thought I should set aside a day to test how many burgers I can eat.

And while I was having such pointless thoughts,

the final question finally rang out.

『NormalPerson』 donated 100,000 won!

I’m curious why you started streaming. It doesn’t seem to be for the money.

“…”

It is for the money…

But I couldn’t say that.

I didn’t want to admit I was materialistic, and it wouldn’t be good for the viewers.

However, the amount of money was significant.

I pondered as much as the amount of money I received.

Reason for streaming?

That’s the reason after money.

Something immediately came to mind.

Money is a significant part of why I stream,

but it’s not the whole story.

“Just because it’s boring to do it alone.”

I want attention.

“I want you to praise my play. It makes my heart swell when you say I’m good.”

Once I started speaking, the thoughts poured out surprisingly easily.

“I feel really good when I see chats saying I’m cute.”

But wait.

Did I really want to say that?

“I feel light and fluffy when I hear that my voice is pretty.”

My mouth moved on its own, as if by magic.

“I just want everyone to like me….”

What am I saying?

Just because I’m streaming to make money.

[Room Manager…]

[Na-na…]

[Mommy…]

[We didn’t know…]

[Who are these people who harass a kind Room Manager like this?]

[Yes, sir.]

[Lick, just lick.]

[Lick lick lick lick lick lick lick lick]

[Rub rub rub rub rub rub rub rub]

[Oh, so sweet.]

[You’re just a fruit.]

[Ah, ah, ah.]

[These people are disgusting. Hahaha]

[You guys are having too much fun. Hahaha]

These people.

Just when I was getting into the mood, they ruin it again!

“I’ll kick out anyone who crosses the line.”

[Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,