Chapter 15

The day after spring.

I was summoned by Lord Joshua again.

He wanted to thank me and apologize for yesterday.

An apology.

What's this? We've been through a lot, but being invited for tea just to apologize is a first.

Considering the rudeness of yesterday, it's nothing compared to what I've been through. If he's going to push more unreasonable demands, I don't need the apology.

How do I turn it down?

Hmm, before I could answer, Bersamum pleaded with me, crying. I had no choice but to accept the invitation.

Is Lord Joshua that scary a master? I didn't know.

"Thank you for coming, Lady Arie."

"Thank you for the invitation, my lord."

Lord Joshua greeted me with a slightly relieved look.

His attitude has changed a lot since yesterday.

Not just Lord Joshua, but the people in the castle seem to look at me differently. It's a bit uncomfortable.

"Last night, my relative was extremely rude. I sincerely apologize."

Whoa! Stop! Don't bow!

Don't all the butlers bow at once!

I hurriedly made them raise their heads.

"Um... I don't quite understand."

The attitude of Count Orsein yesterday wasn't this bad. Given how I've been treated, such an apology is unthinkable.

What's going on? What's starting?

I just wanted to relax a bit now that spring has finally arrived.

"The attitude of Count Orsein and my other guests towards you yesterday. We apologize for allowing it to continue."

"Um..."

"And we, from Gil-Ganzena Castle, sincerely apologize for the numerous rudenesses you've endured since you decided to come to the Echia Temple."

"Um..."

Lord Joshua bowed again, and the butlers and the head maid followed suit.

"Wait, wait, that's enough."

Stop! It's scary! Don't raise the bar any higher!

"Will you forgive us?"

In a panic, I could only nod.

No results from my ladylike education.

Lord Joshua sighed in genuine relief and said thank you again.

Oh, a handsome young man in distress, I'm a bit swooning.

What a beauty. I could forgive just for this.

If it were some spoiled brat, I would have accepted the formality and quickly fled, planning my revenge later.

Because, after all the unreasonable and confusing things I've been subjected to. Teaching music to the people is one thing, but being almost ignored by the castle that should have supported me.

Without people or resources, it's a truly harsh situation for a new priestess.

On top of that, no living allowance, looking back, I wondered why I was pushed to this extent.

At first, the relationship with the castle was so bad that I thought there would be no donations, so I relied on my dowry.

After moving to the castle's annex and having Bersamum as a maid, I finally managed to ask about donations, but I didn't know who to ask.

Sure enough, a bad start leads to inconvenience.

Still, being charmed by Lord Joshua's beauty, I can forgive without any of that.

By being formally apologized to by Lord Joshua, my position here will improve, but my life after leaving here might be even harsher.

So, I'm not ready to forgive the way my life has been messed up.

Not yet.

If someone asks if I would have been happier teaching the next generation at the central temple instead of being sent to carve, I don't know.

But it feels better to be like someone paving the way for others' happiness.

It feels better than carrying an unfair burden.

What really sticks in my mind is that, despite being expected to be someone's one and only, I was pushed aside.

You will always be second.

Not chosen, second.

That's how it felt when I was declared that, and the despair I felt at that moment.

I don't know if Lord Joshua realizes that his actions have put me in this situation.

Unconsciously, he belittles people.

Because he's handsome, because he has status, because he has talent, it's allowed.

I understand that he doesn't do it out of malice, but my heart can't forgive it.

I know I should forgive, but I can't.

Because, this is called resentment. A futile grudge.

But I still can't think, "It's fine, I've been abandoned by my family."

It's okay to think that in my heart.

I won't be mean, so at least let me think that for now.