Chapter 44

thank you to a fan for the ko-fi! they bought 10 chapters worth of ko-fis, so I will try to get those out ASAP! i do not have 10 chapters fully edited, and remember that I am a college students and my editors have lives, so please be patient with us. <:

editor/TLC: serefina & Rin

Zhang Hang felt stifled all the way home and was unable to sleep that night. When Big Black had died, he hated Lu Hongbo, Lu Chengye, and the entire Lu family. However, there was no way he could have them punished for what they did. To others, it was just a dog who had died. Even if a guide dog was a bit more expensive, it was fine as long as they paid more compensation. No one understood how important Big Black was to him and how close they were.

When Big Black died, what he wanted was revenge. He didn’t believe that Lu Hongbo and Lu Chengye were above doing illegal things. He wanted to wait until they slipped up, then have them punished by the law, even if it wasn’t due to the matter with Big Black. So he chose to go to high school and then go abroad to study law, but gradually, his ideas changed.

He thought of Big Black. Big Black, who had taken care of him so gently, who never reminded him of his past experiences nor tried to make him hate his parents. Although Big Black couldn’t speak, Zhang Hang understood that Big Black had always hoped for him to be sparkling clean, not disturbed by any darkness, and not defeated by any difficulties.

After calming down, he was able to think more clearly about things.

He thought of his small house in Kaishi, the investment he made in Beijing, and how they had planned to open a small bar before Big Black died. Zhang Hang suddenly realized that Big Black… knew early on that he would have to go, didn’t he? He had done everything he could to ensure that Zhang Hang would lead a life without money troubles. Even if Big Black had gone, he left him with enough money that he didn’t have to do anything. Zhang Hang could spend his entire life living comfortably, without even including the company that he invested in that was becoming larger and about to go public. He wasn’t just provided with the basic necessities, his socio-economic status would actually land him in the upper class.

Big Black knew that he couldn’t accompany him for that long, so Big Black continually tried to improve his life as much as possible.

Zhang Hang’s hostility gradually faded away. He thought that he should still learn the law to protect the law, but shouldn’t behave irrationally due to hatred. He could not live in hatred, because Big Black had wanted him to spend each day happy. Besides law, he also wanted to learn about what he was interested in. He chose finance, because when he heard the name of the major he would think of Big Black sitting in front of the TV, watching the financial channel. He couldn’t see Big Black, but could imagine it.

Gradually, his hatred was replaced by warm memories. While Zhang Hang studied, he also tried to travel around the world according to his promise with Big Black. He wanted to live a happier life.

It was also considered progress for Zhang Hang to go to Beijing after graduation and choose to settle down there. He wanted to challenge himself to not let what happened make him hate the whole city. Even though the moment he arrived in Beijing, he remembered how he was when he returned to Kaishi with Big Black’s urn five years ago, and became distraught and heartbroken, he still insisted on living in Beijing.

He wanted to be the strongest and gentlest person so that when he died one day and descended into another world of nothingness, he could see Big Black again and tell him with a smile, : omg bruh literally the smartest MC(?) of a BL novel I have ever seen. No dog blood, no (overly long or stupid) misunderstandings. He knows his dog/man(?) lol