Chapter 89

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Xia Xingcheng couldn’t tell what, exactly, he was afraid of–it was just as if there was a dense fear that was constantly squeezing him and making him gasp for breath.

Sometimes, he’d even think about how he should just give up and forget about it. As long as he gave up, he’d truly be able to let out a sigh of relief and never have to worry about these things anymore.

That’s why they say that people were always greedy. At first he thought it’d be fine as long as Yang Youming liked him even a little bit, but later on, he began to feel that Yang Youming loved him, and in the end he hoped that Yang Youming would always love him, never wavering, never giving up. Even when the sky fell, they would carry everything together.

But the greedier you were, the more painful it would become–because you weren’t content, happiness didn’t come easy.

He stayed at home for a few days without contacting Yang Youming, and Yang Youming didn’t contact him either.

When they parted, Yang Youming had obviously said that he would wait for him at home, but he hadn’t returned and Yang Youming hadn’t asked him a single ‘why’.

As long as he chose to let go of this relationship, Yang Youming would certainly never reach out to grasp it. He felt that Yang Youming might not even be sure whether he truly loved him or if he was merely too deep in the act.

Xia Xingcheng was both panic-stricken and exhausted. He still had a lot of things in Yang Youming’s place, yet he couldn’t make himself go there to get them. He didn’t want to talk about breaking up, nor did he want to see the man.

Several days later, before Xia Xingcheng entered the filming crew, Huang Jixin came to his home to pick him up.

As soon as he crossed the doorway, Huang Jixin saw Xia Xingcheng lying on the living room sofa and let out a laugh. “You broke up so soon? Now this is more like your style.”

Xia Xingcheng was reading the script in his hand, and he responded coldly, “Nobody broke up. He’ll look for me himself if he wants to break up.”

“Did you guys fight?” asked Huang Jixin. He changed his shoes and walked towards the side of the sofa.

Xia Xingcheng didn’t respond.

Huang Jixin suddenly recalled what Yang Youming had said to Cai Meiting during their previous meeting. He went up to the other sofa and sat down before saying, “Turn over a new leaf, if you really like him then just be with him.”

Xia Xingcheng’s face showed a look of astonishment, and he stared at him with wide eyes. “Have you gone mad? That’s not what you said before, did Yang Youming put a spell on you?”

Huang Jixin said, “I don’t want you guys to be together, but if your feelings are genuine, what can I do about it?”

Xia Xingcheng turned over and lay on his side. “I just don’t know if his feelings for me are real.”

Huang Jixin didn’t hear him clearly, because once Xia Xingcheng lay on his side, his neckline slid down to reveal his left collarbone, and above his collarbone was a tattoo that was still very fresh, the surrounding skin slightly red and swollen. This caused Huang Jixin to stand up all of a sudden, angrily berating, “Xia Xingcheng!”

Xia Xingcheng looked up at him. “What’s wrong?”

Walking up to him, Huang Jixin reached out and pulled down the edge of his collar to get a clearer view of his tattoo. Xia Xingcheng had tattooed the sun, moon and stars on his collarbone, and they were all overlapping each other. Huang Jixin almost immediately grasped that it referred to a certain ‘Ming’ and Xia Xingcheng’s ‘Xing’.

*The ‘ming’ (明) in Yang Youming can be broken down into 日 and 月 which means the sun & moon, Xia Xingcheng’s ‘xing’ (星) means star as previously stated. Et voila.

“There’s something wrong with you, isn’t there? Do you want to show off to the whole world?” Huang Jixin bellowed.

Xia Xingcheng pushed away his hand. “What ‘show off to the whole world’, this is just an ordinary sun, moon and stars design. Whose thoughts would go there?”

Huang Jixin said, “I could tell at a glance!”

“That’s because you already know. Those who don’t know won’t know, there’s nothing to worry about,” Xia Xingcheng said indifferently.

Huang Jixin remained upset. “What about when you’re filming?”

Xia Xingcheng said, “Concealer can cover it up, it’s not even that big anyway–it’s practically invisible.”

It would be covered as long as his collar was a little bit higher.

Huang Jixin stared at him for a while before asking, “Do you really like him that much?”

Xia Xingcheng was silent for a moment. “If he wants to break up with me, then I also want to keep a memento for myself.”

His next movie ‘Accidental Murder’ was about to officially begin filming. Xia Xingcheng set aside his emotional distress for the time being and gave it his all to throw himself into filming his new movie.

The movie’s male lead was Xia Xingcheng’s character Qian Chengjin’s father, a wealthy middle-aged businessman named Qian Buqiong. He was played by Bao Kai, a middle-aged comedian in his forties who had starred in a good deal of popular comedy movies, and his strength and reputation were not weak.

The role of Qian Chengjin’s little sister Qian Qian was played by a young actress who had previously been a child star. She was not yet twenty but had outstanding acting skills, and her name was Jin Xiaoxu.

However, the actress who would play Qian Chengjin’s stepmother Jia Lizhi was yet to be determined, and it wasn’t until the day Xia Xingcheng joined the crew that Huang Jixin told him that they had finally decided on Yuan Qian.

“Who did you say it was?” At this time, they were already in the nanny car, on their way to the filming site. Xia Xingcheng stared at Huang Jixin in disbelief. “Say that one more time?”

Huang Jixin said, “Yuan Qian, Yang Youming’s old lover.”

Xia Xingcheng grit his teeth and corrected him, “That’s his ex-wife.”

Huang Jixin carelessly complied, “Whatever, it’s Yuan Qian anyway.”

“Yuan Qian is famous for her lack of acting skills—” Xia Xingcheng was interrupted before he could finish his sentence.

Huang Jixin pressed his index finger to his lips, then lowered his voice. “Keep your voice down, it’s not good to spread this around.”

Although Xia Xingcheng tried his best to suppress his voice, he still couldn’t hide his surprise, grabbing Huang Jixin’s hand and asking, “Why is Director Ding willing to use Yuan Qian?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Huang Jixin ignored his fuss. “It’s the power of capital! Do you think that Ding Wenxun alone really has the final say on everything? What’s more, Yuan Qian’s appearance and temperament are in line with the character, and there’s just been big news about her divorce from Yang Youming. The attention on her is also high, so it’s not odd to have her come and act. The fact that it hadn’t been determined until now definitely means that there’s someone behind it.”

Xia Xingcheng frowned in silence.

Huang Jixin elbowed him. “It doesn’t actually have much to do with you. Just film well.”

Xia Xingcheng knew that it didn’t have anything to do with him, and Yuan Qian shouldn’t know about him and Yang Youming either, but as soon as he saw Yuan Qian, it was hard to avoid thinking about Yang Youming, and once he thought of Yang Youming, it messed up his heart.

Although he had a lot of opinions about Yuan Qian, when Xia Xingcheng met Yuan Qian on set, there was a split second where he thought that Yuan Qian could be forgiven in spite of her bad acting skills.

After all, God is fair; where in the world would you find someone who both looked beautiful and had top-notch acting skills to boot? Yuan Qian was so pretty that even if the audience watched the movie, they’d mostly go to see her face. Her acting would probably be enough as long as it wasn’t too bad. But it wasn’t like a perfect person didn’t exist either–like Yang Youming for example; he was handsome, had a great body, good at acting, had a pleasant voice, and what else? Oh, even that part of him was big, Xia Xingcheng thought irrelevantly, his eyes never straying from Yuan Qian’s body.

Later on, Ding Wenxun took Yuan Qian and introduced Xia Xingcheng to her.

With a smile on her face, Yuan Qian looked at Xia Xingcheng and said, “We’ve met before.”

Xia Xingcheng recalled that time at Yang Youming’s house where the two of them had had a hurried and awkward meeting. He nodded at Yuan Qian and politely greeted her, “Qian jie.”

Yuan Qian was still smiling. “Hello.”

Ding Wenxun asked Xia Xingcheng, “You said you had something to say to me just now, what was it?”

A moment ago, Xia Xingcheng wanted to talk to Ding Wenxun about his tattoo, but Ding Wenxun was too preoccupied and he didn’t have any time to get a word out. At this time, Yuan Qian was right next to him, and although Xia Xingcheng felt a little inconvenienced, he still pulled his collar down and said to Ding Wenxun, “I got a tattoo recently, I was wondering if Director Ding thinks it’ll affect the character? I’ll have the make-up artist cover it up if it’s not appropriate.”

Ding Wenxun and Yuan Qian both looked at the tattoo above his collarbone.

The swelling around the tattoo had already gone down, and the overlapping black sun moon and stars gave off a mysterious and alluring impression.

Yuan Qian stared at the tattoo for a good while before looking at Xia Xingcheng’s face.

Ding Wenxun took a glance at it and said, “It’s fine, it doesn’t contradict your role. A tattoo can even show his character.”

Xia Xingcheng was slightly relieved. “That’s great.”

On the first day, Ding Wenxun held a filming ceremony with the movie’s production team and its many actors and also accepted two media interviews.

The media were very eager to interview Yuan Qian, but unfortunately their wishes couldn’t be fulfilled as Yuan Qian left early after the filming ceremony concluded. She was just as unwilling to be interviewed as Yang Youming was, and the two of them never mentioned the divorce in the media for a second time.

That evening, however, Ding Wenxun invited the movie’s production team and a few of the main actors to dinner in a private capacity, and Yuan Qian showed up.

The Japanese cuisine they had that evening was in a big private room of a Japanese restaurant, and their table was made up of several long tables joined together.

Yuan Qian sat between Ding Wenxun and Bao Kai, while Xia Xingcheng sat across from her.

Huang Jixin also went with Xia Xingcheng that evening, and he sat next to Xia Xingcheng while drinking and talking with an assistant director he knew well.

Xia Xingcheng quietly observed Yuan Qian and found that Yuan Qian was really a woman with a lively personality. She both smoked and drank, and seemed to be very close with Ding Wenxun and Bao Kai. They were talking and laughing from start to finish, and despite her drinking with men, it wasn’t the least bit ambiguous.

The way Xia Xingcheng saw it, she and Yang Youming were like people from two different worlds–they weren’t suitable at all.

Yuan Qian’s eyes were big, the colour of her pupils were a bit light, and her skin was so white and translucent that sometimes she looked like a mixed-race woman at a glimpse. She was always smiling; when she smiled too fiercely now and then, there would be faint laugh lines at the corners of her eyes, but once she curbed her smile, those marks would disappear completely.

Xia Xingcheng didn’t know whether Yuan Qian had noticed his gaze, but she held her wine glass and incidentally turned to look at him, her eyes glowing as she raised her glass and said, “I’ll drink a toast to you.”

Xia Xingcheng promptly raised his own glass. “It should be me toasting you.”

After finishing the glass of wine, Yuan Qian listened to Bao Kai as he spoke in her ear once more.

As Xia Xingcheng lowered his glass, he saw Huang Jixin shifting closer, saying in a very soft voice, “Actually, some parts of Yuan Qian’s personality are quite similar to yours.”

Xia Xingcheng was struck dumb as he heard these words, and a sense of unease suddenly rose in his heart.

Huang Jixin immediately followed up with another sentence, “Don’t think too much, I said some parts of your personality. As a person, both of you aren’t alike at all.”

“No kidding,” Xia Xingcheng held back his discomfort and whispered, “She’s a woman, I’m a man.”

Huang Jixin patted his shoulder.

Xia Xingcheng stared at the dishes on the table for a long time and was abruptly overcome with a strong urge to ask Yuan Qian why she had divorced Yang Youming.

This question had always been circling his mind from the beginning, and even though it became less pressing at times, it never faded away. But how was he supposed to bring it up? Since Yuan Qian didn’t know about his relationship with Yang Youming, he was in absolutely no position to open his mouth.

Xia Xingcheng was in a somewhat anxious mood. He got up and went to the washroom.

The bathroom was inside the private room, and there was a short, small corridor in front of it with a sink and a mirror.

When Xia Xingcheng came out of the bathroom, Yuan Qian happened to be standing in front of the sink, washing her hands. He had no choice but to wait behind her.

He watched as Yuan Qian calmly washed her hands, and then she tore a paper towel and wiped her hands. Raising her head, she looked at Xia Xingcheng through the mirror and suddenly asked, “Are you and Yang Youming together?”

In the mirror, Xia Xingcheng distinctly saw his own expression become surprised and defensive.

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⟵ Chapter 88 | TOC | Chapter 90 ⟶

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