Chapter 47

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Fang Jianyuan got together with Qiu Zhen, for no other reason that he desperately needed one last straw to grasp to pull him out of the abyss of hopeless feelings, and Qiu Zhen had volunteered to be that one straw.

But it wasn’t long before they split up. Qiu Zhen was the one who broke up with Fang Jianyuan. He thought Fang Jianyuan’s character was too dull. No matter how good-looking a person was, after some time, that was all he was.

Qiu Zhen broke up with him just before the winter holidays. Fang Jianyuan accepted it calmly, not feeling too sad or angry. At that time, he was in his dorm room packing his things and getting ready to go back home. The only thought in his head was if Qiu Zhen didn’t leave soon, he was bound to miss his train.

When Fang Jianyuan returned to the university after winter break, Qiu Zhen came to his dorm room once more. This time, Qiu Zhen was pale as he brought him terrible news.

Yu Haiyang went back to the city to work in the factory. There was a dormitory building for the factory employees, and Yu Haiyang would always go back to the dormitory every afternoon to take a nap.

At noon that day, he got up from his nap, put on a jacket, and walked out of the dorm room together with his colleagues, chatting as they descended the stairs. Right as they turned a corner, Yu Haiyang saw a familiar figure standing in place.

The person who came looking for him was Fang Jianyuan, dressed in a thick down jacket and a scarf around his neck that covered his pointed chin, revealing only a pair of beautiful yet somewhat dull eyes under his bangs.

It was the time when many people got up from their naps to go back to work, and people kept passing Fang Jianyuan as they made their way down the stairs. They all did a double-take because of his unfamiliar face.

Fang Jianyuan raised his head and saw Yu Haiyang. His eyes blinked lightly twice and he didn’t say a thing.

Yu Haiyang told the co-worker beside him, “Help me take a leave, I have something going on.”

That co-worker shot Fang Jianyuan a strange look, then nodded and went downstairs alone.

Yu Haiyang slowed down his pace and walked to Fang Jianyuan’s side, asking, “Xiao Yuan, what are you doing here?”

People continued to go through them. He looked at Fang Jinyuan and, unable to deal with the onlookers’ attention, he reached out and grabbed Fang Jianyuan’s arm.

Fang Jianyuan whispered, “Can you stay with me for a while?”

Yu Haiyang pulled him towards the upper stairs. “Come with me.”

Yu Haiyang took Fang Jianyuan back to his dorm room. The room had four beds, but there was no one inside when they went in.

As soon as the door closed, Yu Haiyang hugged Fang Jianyuan tightly.

Fang Jianyuan didn’t struggle. He buried his face in Yu Haiyang’s shoulder and put his hands in the pockets of his down jacket, allowing Yu Haiyang to hold him.

After a long while, he said, “I might have AIDS.”

Yu Haiyang stiffened. Slowly letting go of Fang Jianyuan, he raised his hand to pull down the scarf that covered up his face, looked at his pale lips, and asked, “What did you say?”

Fang Jianyuan spoke quite calmly, looking at Yu Haiyang as he said, “I had a boyfriend. We’ve already broken up, but two days ago he came looking for me and said he had AIDS.”

In a flash, the blood drained completely from Yu Haiyang’s face. He grabbed Fang Jianyuan’s hands and asked, “When did this happen?”

Fang Jianyuan didn’t understand clearly. “When did what happen?”

Yu Haiyang’s throat was as dry and painful as if it was blocked up with blood. He said, “When did he catch it? When did you and him—”

“He said he doesn’t know—I’ve only done it with him twice, the last time was on November tenth.” Fang Jianyuan was calm, as if he was telling someone else’s story.

Yu Haiyang gripped his hand tightly. “He didn’t wear a condom?”

Fang Jianyuan was hurt by his grip. Frowning, he stepped back to pull his hand out.

Yu Haiyang’s grip immediately grew gentler, saying, “Sorry, Xiao Yuan.”

Only then did Fang Jianyuan say, “Not that last time.”

It was now already the end of February.

Yu Haiyang asked him softly, “Did you go for a checkup?”

Fang Jianyuan stared at Yu Haiyang. He was silent for a while and said, “I don’t dare to, can you go with me?”

Yu Haiyang’s voice was very soft and gentle, as if he was afraid of scaring Fang Jianyuan. He bent over and tried to level himself with Fang Jianyuan, holding Fang Jianyuan’s ice-cold hands in his warm palm and said, “We can go for a checkup now, we’ll go this afternoon, okay?”

Fang Jianyuan lowered his head, looked at the hand that Yu Haiyang held tightly in his and said, “Aren’t you afraid that I’m already infected?”

Yu Haiyang suddenly pulled Fang Jianyuan into an embrace with great force, wrapping his arm around his underarms and holding him tight, saying in his ear, “Not at all. You’ll definitely be fine, don’t be afraid.”

Fang Jianyuan stared vacantly behind Yu Haiyang. After a while, he raised a hand to grab the hem of Yu Haiyang’s shirt.

That afternoon, Yu Haiyang took Fang Jianyuan to the CDC to draw blood for testing.

The results could not be obtained on the same day. When they exited the CDC, Yu Haiyang smiled and deliberately relaxed his tone, asking Fang Jianyuan, “What do you want to eat tonight? I’ll take you to eat.”

Fang Jianyuan stopped in his tracks and looked up at Yu Haiyang: “Don’t you have to go back home?”

Yu Haiyang said, “I won’t go home tonight.”

Fang Jianyuan still covered half of his face with his scarf. He said, “I’m sorry.”

Yu Haiyang was stunned. “Why are you sorry?”

Fang Jianyuan said, “I shouldn’t have come to look for you, but I don’t know who else to go to.”

Yu Haiyang took a deep breath. He tightened his grip on Fang Jianyuan’s arm, laced their fingers together and pulled him forward, “There’s nothing you shouldn’t do, as long as you need me.”

They got on a bus near the CDC, not discussing where they were going, just watching as the bus completely emptied up. After, they walked to the last row and sat down.

Although the Spring Festival had already passed, winter hadn’t completely left. The sky darkened up earlier, with the trees lining up on both sides of the street had bare branches. There were traces of festivities that remained all over the city–the red lanterns at the entrance of a shopping mall had not yet been taken down, but they were no longer as lively as they were during the festival. On the contrary, it set off a kind of bleak loneliness.

Fang Jianyuan sat by the window with Yu Haiyang beside him, always holding one of his hands.

He stared out the window until it got darker and darker, and the view outside was gradually blurred by the reflection on the glass. He shifted on the chair, tilting his head and slowly leaned on Yu Haiyang’s shoulder, saying, “What do I do if I really have AIDS?”

Yu Haiyang answered him in a quiet tone, “I’ll stay with you, okay?”

Fang Jianyuan suddenly laughed. It was a mocking kind of laugh. He said, “You’re lying to me again.”

Yu Haiyang grabbed his hand and brought it to his lips for a kiss. “It’s going to be okay, Xiao Yuan.”

☆ ☆ ☆

t/n – one more update today! thank you again to ml for your kofis ❤ the next chapter (that i’ll translate and post tomorrow hopefully) will mark the end of fang jianyuan and yu haiyang’s story 😦

⟵ Chapter 46 | TOC | Chapter 48 ⟶

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