Chapter 37

---

"Anyway, it seems impossible to live without drawing attention, so... yeah... I think it's better to give up on that."

On the way back, as I walked through the streets where the sun had long set, I was shocked by the words Mr. Fred said to me.

How could it be... Being careful not to draw attention was something Mr. Fred had told me to do. What could have happened...?

Originally, I hadn't even considered "hiding my abilities and living." For example, if it were a family member, even changing the name wouldn't prevent people from recognizing them if they continued to work in the same field. But I didn't have the kind of talent that would make me famous, so I didn't understand why I needed to hide at all.

However, I was told that even though what I could do wasn't particularly impressive, just having the knowledge made me a very rare presence in the civilian world. Now, I realize I had been quite optimistic.

Those with skills that are advantageous for earning money are rare, and that's why they receive high rewards.

Even if it's something that anyone can learn, the fact that there are so few people who can do it is significant. I hadn't fully grasped this.

Actually, I had also considered translation work, aside from being an adventurer. If I wanted to work as an alchemist, I would definitely be asked about my master and the workshop I came from. To make a living in music or art, I would need to be involved in a salon backed by nobility. Since I didn't have the talent to be recognized from scratch in a place unaffected by my family, I hadn't even considered it.

Among the things I could do, I thought "translation" would be a good way to earn money. Of course, I couldn't do top-tier translation work, but there were many places where even inexperienced translators were in demand.

Even the linguistics lab where Alphonse works often has students translate things that aren't confidential.

However, even if it's something that anyone can learn, if the opportunity to learn is limited, it still makes you stand out in the civilian world. This would make it easier for my family to find me.

Mr. Fred explained this to me, even though I didn't have any skills that needed to be hidden. I wondered why he had said it was better to hide them.

"…! Could it be that Mr. Fred also understands that there's nothing that needs to be hidden…?"

"No, it's completely different."

I asked, thinking I had figured it out, but it seemed I was wrong. I tilted my head in confusion.

Unable to understand, I gave up and looked up at Mr. Fred, asking for the reason. He continued, looking a bit uncomfortable.

"Riana's 'pretending to be normal'… is completely failing."

"…Completely failing…!"

I was somewhat shocked.

I had been living in a way that was different from my usual life, so I knew I was doing some strange things, but I hadn't realized it was that bad. No, maybe...

"Let me make it clear, it's not that you can't do ordinary things, so it's not that you're bad at them."

"I, I understand."

For a moment, I thought that, but I averted my eyes, feeling guilty for lying.

I have been highly evaluated to the point of receiving guild nominations, but I still think, "Is it really a mistake?" or "Is there really so few people who can do what I can do?" In reality, I believe that if others had the same educational opportunities, they could do what I can.

But I understand that it's arrogant for me, who has had those opportunities, to say this, so I don't say it out loud.

"Of course, with time, I think you can learn the 'general standards' and do well within them. Riana, once you're taught, you don't make the same mistake twice."

"…Isn't that obvious? Rather, I always feel guilty about my lack of perceptiveness, which I can't understand without being told…"

"Hehe… Not just in terms of skills, but your way of thinking is also not ordinary… Well, I can mostly guess what kind of education you've had…"

Mr. Fred's words, which ended with a bitter smile, were hard to hear, but I'm sure I disappointed him again. Ugh, I can't stand it.

"For example, the portrait you drew just now was incredibly good… but the music you played on the ship. If you were to rate it as a musician, how many points would you give it? Let's say the minimum professional level is 70 out of 100."

"How many points…"

"An estimate is fine. Think about it as if you were an audience member at that time."

While art is subjective and can't be rated uniformly, I don't think that's what Mr. Fred is talking about.

Hmm, if the minimum professional level is 70… then my mother's singing, which is often called the best among living people, would objectively rate at 95 or higher. For reference, the historical figure Moltenso Yuni, known as the god of music, is assumed to be 99.

The performance on the ship wasn't at full strength. This wasn't an excuse; I also had the purpose of hiding my playing habits. No one who knew me was there, but just in case.

And the deck was rocking, and the sea breeze couldn't be ignored. I received more requests than expected, which made me nervous and led to a few mistakes.

Playing Viera on the deck was the first time, so I only realized the pegs were loosening and the tuning was off as I played.

If I estimate generously, it would be around 35 points.

...No, even now, knowing the true intentions behind my family's praise, both Fred and Anna still point out that my self-evaluation is too low. They say it's because I grew up in an environment with unfair evaluations, but I need to consciously change this.

Right... I need to factor in my low self-esteem. So...

"About 45 points, I guess."

"Too low!! Way too low!! That's why, Riana, you underestimate your value too much…! Personally, I think that performance was easily over 90 points!"

I stuttered at Mr. Fred's hurried denial. I couldn't say I had rated it even lower.

"Well, I think it's clear that Riana's perception is quite different from that of ordinary people. …You've already stood out quite a bit, so it's difficult to correct it now."

"…That much, really?"

"Yeah. I think you need to give up and shift to making it known that you're a valuable enough person to be protected."

I still understand that my self-evaluation is off.

So, failing to become an "ordinary adventurer" and standing out somewhat... I understand what that means. It just makes it easier for my family to find me.

Of course, I intend to be careful not to draw attention in the future. But if I'm found, I need to have a powerful ally... a noble of this country, to protect me from being taken back. I understand the logic.

"I understand that I can't pretend to be normal, but… I don't think I can achieve the kind of accomplishments that would attract a patron…"

"Well, I don't think so at all. Let's discuss the future plan with Anna."

As we climbed the stairs to the apartment, I thought, "Maybe I'm thinking too negatively, but isn't Mr. Fred thinking too positively?" Mr. Fred, who had become accustomed to joining our meals, naturally said, "I'm back~" and knocked on the door to the room where Anna and I lived.