C3 Part1

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*****

That had happened

during middle school. More specifically, it’d happened when I had yet to become

a shut-in, when one of my classmates had made a fuss about her having a

boyfriend.

My thoughts at

that time were simply: “Fuun.”

My other

impression was something along the lines of it feeling like an event that had happened

in another world.

Perhaps that was

also why when Mai confessed to me, I answered her straight up with, “I can’t go

out with you.” I had chosen that path, which had eventually led me to mix in every

single reason I could find to justify my argument.

For me, [Going

out with someone] was an action with the same meaning as [Taking responsibility

for each other’s lives]. It was that heavy.

Because, even within

the shounen manga I read, the

protagonists would make a once-in-a-lifetime confession, and that scene would

be the climax of the story. Never once had I realized that in the real world,

there would be a continuation from that moment.

I also didn’t

know that most humans couldn’t have their first love fulfilled, go through

breakups, and become an adult while walking through those phases. During their

growth, eventually they would meet ‘the real one’, marry each other, and then

start walking down the path of life together.

Well, if that's the case, isn’t it okay to treat your

first lover lightly? …those kinds of thoughts didn’t

form inside my head. If someone’s ideal could be changed that easily, then I

bet life would be far more easier…

On top of that,

to think that my first confession came from the most popular person in our

school, someone extraordinary who resembled the sun—it would be a given that if

I actually went out with her, I would be attacked by my own complex 24 hours a

day, becoming overwhelmed and crushed.

It wasn’t like I

wanted to be a protagonist from shoujo

manga who somehow catches the Super Darling’s eyes. I simply wanted to live

the pages of a slice-of-life manga,

where I could enjoy my days peacefully.

Even so, the days

I spent with Mai had been enjoyable. My heart beats fast when our hands

intertwined. Our kisses sometimes led to some dangerous situations where our

bodies laid on each other. Considering everything that happened, somehow, I

still stubbornly said that we were friends.

Humans weren't simply

formed by themselves.

Humans received

influence from others when growing up. Something like manga, games, or television shows, or also from families, friends,

stuff they see on the news. In the end, humans were composed of a lot of

things.

And that moment,

I realized my body already had a piece of Oozuka Mai fused inside, which had become

a part of me.

The messages she

sent late at night while I was gaming. The photos of herself, the dashing

Oozuka Mai. Her voice on the phone during our casual phone calls. Her smile,

which resembled the sun.

Since the

beginning, Mai had displayed everything and showed me the truth.

It was impossible

for an Olympic athlete to have a short-distance running match with a

grade-schooler. But the ability to communicate with each other wasn’t something

visible. Even though we could bare our true abilities to some degree, in the

end we couldn’t really comprehend each other’s level of communication no matter

how hard we tried.

I’d like to think

that the relationship between Mai and I was something along those mechanisms.

Me, who

desperately kept up my appearance even though I was barely able to have a

conversation with other people, was like a baby learning to walk for the first

time. On the other hand, Mai was like a mother, gently holding my hands and

guiding me.

Patiently waiting

for my mind to mature.

She kept lighting

my way—always, always, leading me.

Honestly, I still

couldn’t surely say that these feelings are love, even so.

Towards Mai, I—

What exactly

could I do to repay everything she did for me?

***

“Oozuka-san?”

“Y-yes.”

It was break

time, and I met Michiru-sensei in the hall to ask whether she saw Mai or not.

“Err, I’m sorry,

I didn’t see her.”

“I-I see. I understand. I’ll look for her. Thank you for telling me.”

After I walked

for a few steps, she called my name from behind.

“Ah, right right,

Amaori, you shouldn’t go to the rooftop so often, okay? The fences were quite

short there. It can be dangerous. That’s why it’s forbidden to students,

alright?”

Michiru-sensei’s

tone when scolding her students was always light. Her way of speaking never

made the students want to rebel against her. Most of them properly accepted her

requests. I respected her for that. It

was like she was born for the sake of being a teacher.

“Ah, yes, I

understand. I’m really sorry.”

I bowed my head.

If by any chance I told her that I’d already fallen from it once, I bet it

would instantly get blocked, huh. After we parted ways, I walked off hurriedly.

It was the

weekday after the love hotel party with Kaho-chan. I was looking for Mai,

hoping I could properly speak with her.

For some reason,

I hadn’t been able to find her. Considering her extreme popularity, it

should’ve been easy enough to find out where she’d gone. However, I was only

able to get some information from people I asked. It was starting to feel like

I was searching for a legendary creature.

If I still

couldn’t find her, then… I headed to the one place, the last spot I had in my

mind.

I climbed the

stairs. At the unlocked iron door, I placed my hand on the doorknob.

I slowly opened

it.

Once it opened,

my eyes were filled with bright light.

Under the vast

sky stood Mai.

She stood there,

but…

“Mai…?”

Rather than joy

since I was finally able to find her, I felt perplexed the moment I saw her

figure.

Mai turned around.

“...so it’s you.”

“Just now…”

I stopped my

sentence midway and closed my mouth. Mai was someone who had always shone

brightly just like the sun in the sky, of course that would never be the case.

The fact that she

had looked so hopeless, like someone who was ready to jump from here any time…of

course that was out of the question.

“No, nothing.

Umm, you see, I have something I want to talk about with you.”

I smiled and approached

her. It had really been a while since the last time it was just the two of us,

alone like this. Would I be able to make a proper expression?

Mai instantly brightened.

She looked like her usual self like this.

“I see. What a

wonderful coincidence. The thing is, I also wanted to talk to you about

something.”

“Ah, is that so?”

“Yeah.”

I faced Mai and

stood right before her.

This was

different from talking to Kaho-chan. I needed to look up when I talked with

Mai. Somehow, this angle that I was supposed to have been used to felt so nostalgic.

“Umm, you can go

ahead then.”

“Aah, alright. Let’s see.”

It was hard to

find the right timing. I couldn’t really remember how I had normally interacted

with Mai before. What kind of expression had I made whenever I was together

with her, I wondered.

“If you’re okay

with this—”

Mai’s hair swayed

in the breeze as she let out a gentle smile, a smile that was truly Oozuka

Mai-like.

“I finally

managed to catch a break this Sunday. I was thinking of inviting you somewhere.

Let’s go on a date.”

“A d-date!”

It had been a

while since the last time I received a straightforward invitation like this. Her

words rang inside my chest. I bet this was also the effect of my recovered MP.

It basically increased my sensitivity to every external stimulation I received.

Simply said, it made me behave like some sort of inexperienced person…

Mai giggled at my

huge reaction.

“It’s definitely

worth the effort when I manage to surprise you like that,” she said.

“Th-that’s—the timing is a bit bad or so…”

Mai shrugged her

shoulders at my nonsensical excuse.

“Well, it’s not

like it will be only the two of us. It’ll be the three of us with Ajisai.

That’s what I wanted to tell you.”

I blinked at her.

“Eh…the th-three

of us…?!”

“Of course, if you’re not willing to, then—”

“W-wait, wait a minute,” I interrupted Mai’s sentence by shaking my hands.

Not only had I continued

with the flow of the conversation, somehow, I’d also managed to stall time for

myself to think properly about the topic. It wasn’t an exaggeration if I said

that I’d grown a lot since my first encounter with Mai…if that was the case.

The three of us,

eh.

In short, that

was…it would be the continuation from that day, right?

Mai stared at the

skies above.

“Well, it’s best

if you don’t put up your guard like that. It’s not like I’m pushing you to

hurry and come to a conclusion. It’s just—I think it’ll be agonizing if no one

does anything and just wait for the time to pass like this. So, what do you

think? If it puts too much burden on you, we can do it next time.”

I ended up

nodding at her suggestion.

“......I

understand.”

I still had some

time until the deadline, but…if during this time, I kept looking away from this

problem, which only added to misery for them, then... No, I couldn’t really say

anything about Mai though!

I clutched my

hands tightly, then nodded to Mai’s suggestion again.

“I’m looking

forward to it!”

“Nn…I see. Well then, it’s decided then. Since we’re doing this, how about

going to the amusement park?”

“Amusement park!”

Somehow it made the

date sound like a date.

Well, three

friends having fun at the amusement park did sound exciting, but this time

might be different. This wouldn’t be simply interesting—it’d probably lead to

another difficult situation.

But still, I wasn’t

going to run away. I would face the two of them properly.

“Ah, but you

definitely can’t rent the whole place, okay?! That would be so overwhelming my

stomach would split open!”

“Alright. About renting the whole place, let’s put that on hold until after we

listen to Ajisai's opinion. In case we can’t really agree on that, we can

decide by taking a vote.”

“Let’s aim for consensus then!”

I forced myself

to look like I was in high spirits. Mai laughed.

“Ah right, what

was the reason you were looking for me earlier?”

“Ah, err, yup.”

I scratched my

cheek and averted my gaze. While letting out an awkward laugh, I opened my

mouth.

“Since we’re

doing this, umm, I’ll tell you during our date. And so, umm, yup.”

“I see. I get it. I’m really looking forward to it.”

I came this far

thinking I had something to talk to her about, but it wasn’t like I had formed

a concrete plan. After all this time? It somehow made me embarrassed. Could it

be that I had simply wanted to hear her voice after all? Yeah right… My cheeks

were slowly getting warm.

“?”

I snuck a look at

Mai, who tilted her head at me. Then I glanced away. Aa-aah, this wasn’t good.

My answer to Kaho-chan from that day kept repeating inside my chest, just like

an organ that kept playing.

“It’s nothing!”

It’s just—I

perfectly understood that she was supposed to be a beauty, but the Mai right

now…had she been this beautiful all along…?

Geez. Now that I

had admitted to my feelings, I was sure that it would be impossible to keep

things as is. I understood that. Even so, I was convinced of one thing—the fact

that nothing was constant.

Whether it was

people, relationships, or feelings.

At first it was

Mai, and then Ajisai-san. They showed me their courage, for the sake of

changing our relationship.

And so, next

would be my turn.

***

After talking to

Ajisai-san about our plan and getting her on board, we confirmed our three-way

date.

Oddly, I felt

calm throughout the whole week, until our promised Sunday.

I wondered if it

was because I was determined to do this, that my brain had somehow started taking

things seriously. While waiting solemnly for the last verdict, I tried to think

not only about myself, but also Mai and Ajisai-san.

It was

just…admitting something like this was kind of, quite, how should I put it… It made

me rather pessimistic.

Ever since my

high-school debut, I’d always faced a storm of troubles, so much that peaceful

days free of troubles seemed nearly nonexistent. That was the kind of life I

was living.

Our date was a huge success! It was practically smooth

sailing! Happily, ever after! …yeah right, considering

everything that had happened to me, that kind of ending would never happen…

But, whoever

thought that, and to think that—Mai had suggested something like that, I really

didn’t expect that.

Currently, I had

to do everything just in order to survive. I had no space to properly be

considerate of how others felt. Which was why I was sure that I’d neglected a

lot of people’s thoughts due to my ignorance.

If I could, I

really wanted to have a proper talk with Mai from this moment forward. After

all, we were talking about Mai, someone who was far more stubborn than me.

Well, I didn’t think that she’d easily tell me about the honest thoughts in her

head though.

Hey, Mai.

What are you always thinking about?

***

When Sunday came, I toughened my resolve and boarded the train.

Due to my anxiety,

I woke up at five this morning and ended up taking two showers. Then I put on

my best clothes. After that, I arranged my hair properly and put on my makeup.

I also cleaned my room a bit.

Rather than a fun

date, I felt like I was headed to some battleground. I was starting to consider

borrowing Kaho-chan’s fake katana to make me feel better, the one she usually

used for cosplay.

I got off at the

designated station and walked in the sunny weather. It made me recall Mai’s

words from back then: The weather would

be sunny as long as I wished for it. That’s the kind of woman I am.

If so, then today’s

clear sky might also be thanks to Mai’s wish.

I arrived a bit

earlier than the time we’d agreed on. I thought about Mai who was bad with

crowds. What if she was surrounded the moment people figured her identity? It

would be a mess.

When I approached

the ticket entrance, I still hadn’t caught sight of Mai and Ajisai-san.

I stared blankly

at the couples and families that passed by while I waited for them.

“To think that

I’m coming to an amusement park together with Mai and Ajisai-san like this,” I

murmured slowly. Considering everything that had happened in the past, it was

hard to believe this was reality.

Once I realized

I’d already come this far…since the day of my high-school debut…

Arms folded, I

drowned myself in my own thoughts. That was when I caught someone’s figure from

afar.

The first one to

arrive was Ajisai-san. Once she saw me, she trotted to me.

“Hello

Rena-chan.”

“G-good morning!”

Ajisai-san was so

cute!

Oh no, I should

keep my composure…my eyes would turn heart-shaped at this rate…

Once I managed to

overcome my rapid heartbeat, the next to follow was misery. This heart sure was

demanding. You didn’t need to behave this enthusiastically since I was normally

really grateful to you, so just calm down a bit, Heart-kun…

However,

Ajisai-san kept staring at me, so being composed in this situation was

something hard to do!

“W-what is it…?”

“Hmm, I'm just thinking, will she say it

today? so I ended up staring at you.”

“What could it be……ah, today’s weather sure is great, huh….?”

“You’re right.”

Ajisai-san

laughed, her head tilted slightly, but she formed an x-mark over her chest.

Wrong answer!

In a fluster, I

shouted as I tried to recover my tainted honour.

“I-it makes me

happy that I’m able to meet you on the weekend!”

“Nnnn~~ me too.”

Ajisai-san clutched

her skirt and looked down. Could it be that my answer was right…? Nah, I

wonder… Her expression was kinda hard to read.

Ever since her

confession, she was trying to cut down the distance between us, which was

aggressive to the point of fearsome.

My normie mask

was as thin as the shell of a cream puff pastry, so I was under constant fear of

my true colors showing. I really had to do my best to not show her my gross

side… So, I decided that I shouldn’t carelessly open my mouth and keep saying,

“You’re cute, so cute,” like what I’d done during summer break…

“So, Mai-chan

hasn't come yet?” Ajisan-san asked.

“Y-yeah. Well, it’s possible that she’s already waiting in her limousine at the

parking area though.”

“Aah, that limousine. She’s always in that limo on rainy days or some other occasions,

right? As expected, a true lady really is amazing after all.”

After she said

it, Ajisai-san noticed something and pulled her phone from her bag.

“Ah, it’s from

Mai-chan. Yes, hello?”

I wondered if she

was telling us that she might get a bit late.

After a short

conversation, Ajisai-san took the phone away from her ears, looking troubled.

And then, slowly,

she said something surprising.

“Mai-chan, she

has a sudden job so she can’t make it today…was what she’d said.”

“Eh…?”

In short it was—err,

what?

Placing a hand

over her mouth, Ajisai-san averted her gaze and then told me, “Mai-chan also

said, ‘You two should enjoy yourself today’…”

“Eeeeh…..?”

Wait a moment,

Mai. That was, uh, that was sure out of nowhere, huh?!

Just me and

Ajisai-san? Of course I hadn’t prepared beforehand. I had been thrown into a

huge mess.

“Nah, well it can’t

be helped if she had a sudden job, but as expected…”

“Yeah…what should we do?” Ajisai-san asked anxiously.

If you asked me

something like that…

“Ah, well then, since Mai is not here, I’m

going home now. See you tomorrow at school!”

As if I could say

something like that!

“L-let’s enjoy

this then, just two of us…”

“But—”

Crap. I’d been so

nervous I’d whispered that. It would only make Ajisai-san feel more anxious

than before, right? You got it wrong!

“Let’s ultra

enjoy this, just the two of us! Let’s go, let’s go! Nah, I really was looking

forward to the amusement park! With Ajisai-san on top of that! Yaay, yaay!”

“Waa.”

I pulled

Ajisai-san's hand forcefully and headed toward the entrance.

I was too late to

realize. Hand…this, this was Ajisai-san’s hand! How soft!

“Ah, nah, umm,

you get this wrong!”

Right before I was

going to let go of her hand, Ajisai-san held my hand back while looking

nervous.

“Y-yeah…I

understand. Take care of me today then.”

Hii, she grabbed my hand, she

really grabbed it.

The distance between

us while holding hands meant a distance where our hands were intertwined. If we

tried to pull away, the distance would be 2 meters at most. If we walked like

that, it was plainly difficult by society standards, so we huddled close,

keeping around 30 cm of distance between us.

In short,

Ajisai-san was close. I didn’t have any idea what perfume she used, but she

smelled amazing. I see. This made my heart beats furiously.

“Since we’re here,

let’s enjoy today.”

Ajisai-san

smiled, almost like she was inviting me to skip class to go to the beach.

Whether my heart would

be able to endure today, stay tuned to find out!

Mai, you little…

After entering

the ticket entrance, we spread out the pamphlet and picked our first

destination.

It was obvious,

but during this time, Ajisai-san was also so close to me. And naturally, my

breath caught in my throat. It seemed like the average for humans to hold their

breath was around one minute. That was the only time I had until I reached my

limit.

“Rena-chan, are

you alright with riding a jet coaster? …..Rena-chan?”

“Ah, yes.”

I pulled my face away

and took a breath. So I just figured out that humans need to breathe in order

to speak properly. You couldn’t have a conversation while holding your breath.

I see, I just matured nicely once again.

In the first

place, I had never come to an amusement park before. Which was why I didn’t have

a clue to whether I was comfortable with the jet coaster or not. Well, as

expected it looked a bit scary, huh. Thrill rides like those were…even the name

sounded scary. If by any chance I came by myself or with my family, I would

probably turn down the idea.

“Err, how about

you, Ajisai-san?”

“I…well, I kind of want to try it.”

She giggled, hiding

her mouth behind the pamphlet. Fufufu.

“Whenever I come with

my family, we would have to go on the rides my brothers wanted. So things like

the merry-go-round or the teacup ride. Geez, I'm already a high-schooler

though, so those are kinda embarrassing, eh.”

Ajisai-san riding

a children’s attraction would definitely look adorable. I nodded along at the

thought.

“I see! Let’s

ride that then!”

“Is that okay with you?”

“Huh, yeah, of course. I don’t really get dizzy even after playing 3D games!”

I didn’t know

whether these things were related or not, but I might have a pretty tough

semicircular canal. Well, the only problem here was my fear though.

“I see, well then—err,

it seems that there are a lot of different types of jet coasters.” Ajisai-san

looked like she was enjoying herself as she pored over the pamphlet, pointing

things out with her finger.

Instead of

looking at what her finger was tracing on the pamphlet, I gazed at her profile.

She was

everyone’s Ajisai-san at school but, right now, she was my Ajisai-san and mine

only, eh…

To think that a

girl with beauty on a national level had said that she liked me…eh? Was it

real? I wasn’t hypnotized or anything, but it felt like my mind was on the

verge of being crushed.

“What is it?”

Noticing my gaze,

Ajisai-san asked me, her head cocked to the side.

“Ah, nothing.”

I raised my hands

like I was guarding myself, then said it bashfully.

“It’s just,

Ajisai-san sure looks cute today, or so…”

“Ah, that.”

Ajisai-san’s face

instantly reddened. She looked at me from a lower angle though the corner of

her eyes.

“You finally said

it—that I’m cute.”

“Uee?!”

I was bathed in

such an adorable reaction from her out of nowhere that I was only able to

shriek.

“No, no no…to

think that you count things that come out of my mouth, that’s only 1% of what I

was saying in my mind, you know….”

“...well then, does that mean you said the other 100 inside your mind?”

Her probing was

getting too deep.

“Y-you’re right,

that might be true…”

“Eeh?”

Hearing my

answer, she looked so unsatisfied that she pouted. But why!

“Ah no, even 100

times might be too few after all! Because, I always think about your cuteness

every second and every moment. Even now, I also think that you’re so cute!

Perfectly adorable!”

“Th-then~~...”

She opened her

mouth reluctantly, like she was going to say something difficult to speak of.

Considering this was the playful Ajisai-san, the one that only appeared when it

was just the two of us, I wondered what kind of thing she would utter that she

found hard to say. That definitely would be a fatal blow, no?

“It would be

better if you properly put it into words when you think about it, right~?”

Ultra super

difficult quest had appeared.

Nah, saying it

out loud might be easy, but…it was something like uttering, “Sugar is sweet” or

“The evening sun is red”... Still, I couldn’t help but think how pathetic I was

considering the number of times I’d repeated that. But well, this was something

requested by Ajisai-san, so… For me who kept doing dishonorable things, I had

no right to turn her down.

I placed my hand

on my chest, and then took a deep breath.

“I understand.

Ajisai-san, you’re cute.”

“So abrupt?!”

“Even the surprised Ajisai-san is also cute. Your retorts are also cute. Your

voice is already cute in the first place.”

“G-geez—we’re going now, Rena-chan!”

“Aah, even the walking Ajisai-san is so cute. The sounds of your footsteps are

so cute. It’s like adding cuteness on top of cuteness, how cute. You even look

so cute from behind.”

“Geez, I get it! It’s my fault so stop it~!”

Even after

getting scolded by her, I didn’t stop saying cute, cute for a while. The moment

Ajisai-san gave me a harsh, “Bad!”, I stopped. Even the angry Ajisai-san was so

cute.

It was my first

jet coaster experience, so we decided to start from the easy one.

We chose the

thrill ride aimed at first-timers. It was the kind of attraction that brought

us to a certain height, and then dropped at a high speed. It wasn’t a jet

coaster, but an attraction called free-fall.

We lined up for a

while, and then finally our turn came.

We settled into

the designated seats. From above, a cushion-like safety lock fastened over us

and held us in our seats. I couldn’t move my body.

“S-somehow, this

makes me nervous…”

“R-right? I also feel so excited. I can’t wait.”

Ajisai-san looked

like her little brothers when her eyes sparkled like that.

Slowly, the

thrill ride started to move. I began to hear people’s yelps from here and

there. We were slowly getting higher. My legs felt like they were floating in

the air. It was kinda disheartening. Could

it be that I shouldn't be doing this…? my heart whispered.

I looked at the

view. We were already at a height that might be higher than a building. Stuff

like this might spell an end for people with height phobia, huh… But I was

still okay. I was still barely alright. I was a first-born daughter so I could

hold back. I wouldn’t be able to do it if I was the second daughter.

Finally, we

arrived at the highest point of the attraction.

That moment, in

one shot—

I felt like I was

being pulled by gravity itself.

I fell.

—the sense of

floating around.

“Hii.”

“Kyaaaa.”

I desperately

clutched the safety bar. Next to me, Ajisai-san was screaming whole-heartedly

like she was enjoying it. It felt like my insides were being pushed around. My

eyes spun.

I felt like I was

being shaken by the titan's arms, going back and forth between up and down. The

elevator with the duty of making people scream finally arrived at the

bottom…and then it stopped.

The safety lock

was taken off. With shaky legs, I placed my feet on the ground. I took my bag,

and then left the attraction with Ajisai-san.

Ajisai-san looked

excited, smiling widely while fixing her hair.

“That was

incredible! That was fun right, Rena-chan?”

“I, I-I, I…”

“Re-Rena-chan? A-as I thought, was it too scary? Should we take a break…?”

I gripped my

hands tightly.

“—I had a blast!”

“Wa, it’s like Rena-chan’s eyes are sparkling!”

“Yup! Since I really had fun! It felt so great!”

From my first

experience, I ended up becoming hooked on thrill rides.

Somehow, it had

been incredible. I had just tasted something so incredible…! Everyone, so

everyone was experiencing this without telling me…! How unfair!

That moment, I

had a sense of deja vu.

The same feeling

I had during my date with Mai. The date course I’d chosen at that time was

bringing her to the VR studio. During that time, Mai also seemed like she was having

fun from her laughter. Pang. There was a slight pain in my chest.

“Rena-chan?”

Ha, I felt like I was suddenly pulled

back to reality. I looked around my surroundings. Right now, we were at the

amusement park. Right now, I was with Ajisai-san. Despite the fact, I was still

thinking about someone else.

“S-sorry, did you

say something?”

“Not really. I just asked where we should go next.”

“R-right. For now, we shall conquer every thrill ride in this park!”

“You sure look excited! Ah, but—”

After Ajisai-san

thought for a while, she blew a sigh, seeming to release the tension from her

body, and then laughed.

“It would be

great if we leave one attraction… So, we can ride it together with Mai-chan

next time.”

“Ah…”

So it wasn’t just

me. Ajisai-san had also thought about Mai.

When I saw

Ajisai-san's smile, the guilt I had been feeling since earlier slowly faded

away. I see. It would’ve been better if I’d said it clearly from the beginning.

As I thought, Ajisai-san is really kind. She was amazing.

“Yup.”

I nodded, also

laughing.

“I wonder what

would happen if it turns out that Mai is bad with thrill rides, eh.”

“Ahaha, that possibility might not be zero. If so, we could have fun with the

three of us riding the merry-go-round.”

“Eeh, that sounds so cute. If we go, I really want to record that.”

We headed to the

next ride while laughing together.

We lined up at

the thrill ride attraction, rode it, took a break at the café, then headed to

the next one.

We kept repeating

that and before I noticed, the skies were already basked in twilight.

Thanks to our

activities, we had ended up memorizing the park’s maps. We took a seat at the

bench for a rest.

“We sure played

around a lot today!”

“Sure did~”

The exhaustion in

our bodies somehow felt great, and we laughed next to each other.

At first I really

had no idea how things would unfold, but spending a day with just the two of us

like this had been fun.

Of course, the

fact that Ajisai-san had high social skills also played an important role.

Even so, the

amusement park also played a crucial part to the day. I was able to think of a

lot of topics while walking around the park, such as sharing our impressions of

the previous attractions we went on while we lined up for the next one. The

time had passed in the blink of an eye.

Today, I was able

to truly understand why the amusement park was a standard date spot. Somehow,

we’d simply had a lot of fun…

“We still have

time for one more ride, eh. Hey Ajisai-san, do you have something else you want

to go on?”

“Ah, well then, umm…”

Ajisai-san almost

raised her hand but then drew it back, her gaze wavering.

“What is it, what

is it? You can say anything. Today we kept riding things I’d wanted after all.

You should get dibs on the last ride!”

“I’d also wanted to go on the thrill rides you chose, but yup, thank you, Rena-chan.”

“It’s nothing!”

“The thing is, I think it might be too soon, but… but since we’re here anyway,

I was thinking that I wanted to ride that with you.”

Her voice somehow

sounded so beguiling.

I glanced at

where she was pointing. Instead of pointing at the map, she was gesturing at a

single attraction, its gondolas moving like the hands of a giant clock. It was

a ferris wheel.

Ajisai-san's

cheeks became redder than before.

“You see…I always

wished that one day I could ride a ferris wheel with the person I like.”

The passion

stemming from her swept over me like a storm swaying my hair.

Once I had a

taste of that storm, it suddenly felt suffocating.

“Ah, err…”

I was sure that

if I was the same person as before, then I would thoughtlessly nod my head out

of momentum.

Right now, I

couldn’t say that I liked myself but still…nonetheless, as someone who received

Ajisai-san’s love, I wanted to acknowledge myself. Those were my true feelings.

And my first step

toward that was to properly accept Ajisai-san’s feelings.

“...yeah.”

I nodded and

stretched out my hand.

“Let’s go.”

The expression

that emerged on her face wasn’t a smile.

“Yeah…Rena-chan.”

It reminded me of

a little girl who became confused by the weight of her luggage. It was that

kind of expression.

On the gondola,

with only the two of us, Ajisai-san chose to sit next to me instead of in

front.

It wasn’t the

same as our time at the free-fall attraction, since right now it was only the

two of us inside this tightly-closed space, cut off from the outside world.

If by any chance

in the next 10 minutes I had the urge to run outside, it wouldn’t be possible except

I decided to jump off the gondola in midair.

This was a

completely different feeling from riding with my family. So this was a ferris

wheel date…!

“...you see,

Rena-chan.”

“Y-yes.”

Ajisai-san sounded

a bit bashful beside me.

“You see, right

now…I feel nervous.”

“I-is that so…? Me too…”

Well, I basically

always felt nervous around Ajisai-san so it wasn’t like I could use that as a

reference this time though…

Ajisai-san spoke slowly.

“That’s why,

umm…I might do something a bit weird, an action you might be confused by. So

I’m sorry if I surprise you later.”

“I, I see…but it’s okay! Since I’m already used to being surprised!”

If I scored my

answer for her just now, then out of a perfect 100, it scored 2.

Since Ajisai-san

didn’t react to my answer, it seemed like she really was nervous this time.

What should I

do…I’d never experienced this pattern before so I couldn’t prepare for whatever

might be coming.

“A-are you okay?

Should I do the Big Sis Renako? Good girl, good girl…”

I spoke with a

tone that I had used to talk to the five-year-old Ajisai-san. Seeing that,

Ajisai-san looked rather annoyed.

Hii!

“Geez…right now

isn’t the time for that.”

“My apologies!”

She might think

that I was fooling around just now. But still, a peevish Ajisai-san was also

extremely adorable, it was great…! But it seemed like pouring oil to a blazing

fire if I said that out loud. I closed my mouth.

Slowly,

Ajisai-san placed her hand on top of my palm.

Uwaa…

The soft

sensation tickled me. I felt as if my senses were focused on the single spot

where we were touching.

“Re-Rena-chan…

“Yes, uh…”

“...I like you.”

“......y-yeah…”

With only those

words, I felt like my consciousness was going to be blown away.

“I really like

you, Rena-chan…thank you for today.”

“No it’s okay…the feeling is mutual.”

“I had fun.”

“Yeah, me too.”

At that moment,

Ajisai-san finally smiled.

The tense

atmosphere from earlier was slowly fading away.

And then,

Ajisai-san let out a huge sigh.

“Haa…saying something like that sure

needs a lot of courage, eh. Rena-chan is incredible…”

“R-really?”

“Since you normally keep saying that you like me.”

“No well…it’s the same as the time I said cute, and I really meant it…”

And also,

perhaps…since I didn’t really mind the other person’s reaction, it was

something that the present me pushed one-sidedly. Which meant it was on a

different meaning with Ajisai-san’s [like].

…well, I wasn't

really sure about my current feelings though.

My body grew hot

in an instant. Aah geez, even though Ajisai-san was next to me, I definitely

didn’t want to smell like sweat. I didn’t have a way to fight the physiological

phenomenon though…

Then Ajisai-san laughed.

“But still, we

should keep it a secret from everyone that we rode the ferris wheel and had a

date today, eh?”

“Y-you’re right.”

Ajisai-san placed

her finger on top of her lips.

“Here, like this,

a secret. Rena-chan, you should do it too.”

“Okay.”

I followed

Ajisai-san's gesture while laughing.

“A secret—”

The moment my

finger touched my lips, Ajisai-san closed her eyes, and then brought her lips

closer.

“Eh—”

My vision was

filled with Ajisai-san.

And there were my

lips.

—or not…her lips

touched the finger placed between us.

She kissed me.

“Aha…”

Ajisai-san pulled

away, her hair swinging around her. Her laughter was as beautiful as a blooming

flower. With half-closed eyes, she squeezed her cheeks between her hands, as if

trying to hide her embarrassment.

“.....that was

nerve-wracking.”

My heart was

beating so fast, yet I could feel a pang in my chest.

I couldn’t hear

anything other than my loud heartbeat.

“A…Ajisai-san…..”

My index finger

was still stuck on my lips.

“Um, you see.” Bashfully,

Ajisai-san slowly opened her mouth. “Since we’re still not going out yet, we

couldn’t kiss. But you see, I wanted to do it… And since I wanted to, I did it

through your finger.”

It was so

adorable, just like the time she’d thrown me a kiss.

To think that

there was a human who had touched Ajisai-san’s lips. It was something so far from

my imagination that I’d never thought about it before.

It was so sudden

that I couldn’t even remember the sensation of her lips from the moment it

touched my finger.

One thing was

certain—I’d never be able to erase Ajisai-san’s current expression from my

memories, her bashful appearance before me in this moment.

The gondola that

brought us touched the ground.

It was a sign

that the secret time between the of us ended.

“Well then,

bye-bye, Rena-chan.”

Our bodies swayed

in the night train, and then we arrived at Ajisai-san’s stop.

“Yup…be careful

on your way home, Ajisai-san.”

“That also applies to you, since you’re a very charming girl yourself.”

“R-really? I see.”

Ajisai-san

thrusted her finger at me. Her movement was beautiful, like a theatrical

gesture, and at that, I was only able to answer with a foolish laugh.

“So, um…good

night.”

“Okaay, good night.”

The doors started

closing. At that brief moment, Ajisai-san flashed me a smile that seemed

lonely.

“Next time, we’ll

go together with Mai-chan, okay?”

I didn't

understand the meaning behind her words.

“Yup…with Mai.”

I couldn’t

respond with anything other than repeating her words. I clenched my fists.

Ajisai-san stayed

there until my train left the station and saw me off until I could no longer

see her.

And then I was

alone. I released a huge sigh instinctively.

After being

showered with Ajisai-san’s cuteness for a whole day, I felt like it wouldn’t be

easy to return to reality.

…that was fun.

I really meant

that.

Well, that last

part when we had an indirect finger kiss made my heart feel like it would

burst, though.

“Haaa…”

But, well. Even

so.

I’d already

decided.

Between me and

Mai, also with Ajisai-san. What kind of relationship I sought from them.

The last thing I

needed was courage.

I’d already

believed myself with this decision. I only needed to ask them now.

My stomach hurt,

like I’d just eaten burning stones.

Beyond this was

the light—Mai and Ajisai-san. But when I turned around, the one who greeted me

was the other side of me, an unending darkness.

That darkness kept

trying to persuade me to stop doing this.

I don’t want to choose anyone. I want to keep things this

way. I want to stay in this comfortable lukewarm water. I want to cover my ears

and not move from here. I want to run away. I want to pretend nothing happened.

I want to stay locked in my room. I don’t want to face the consequences. I only

want to spend my days joyfully, having a good time like that.

I chose to

swallow every foolish and naive rant and rave I said in my head.

I glanced at the

night scenery outside the window.

The moon, shining

brightly amidst the night sky, also looked pretty today.

I wondered if I

had managed to become closer—even for a little—to the ideal version of me that

I had dreamt of since that day. I didn’t have the answer. In the first place,

what kind of ideal state did I longed for? I couldn’t see her face clearly as

it was covered by the light. I was only able to see her silhouette.

Nonetheless, time

wouldn’t stop. Just like the moving ferris wheel, the hands of the clocks

wouldn’t stop moving.

“Next time, when

I meet Mai and Ajisai-san at school, then that time I will properly…properly…”

I wondered if the

current me would be able to say it or not. Once again, I felt like my heart

would be engulfed in darkness.

That moment, I

got a notification from a message.

It was from

Kaho-chan.

[I decided that I

would go to the Makuhari Cosplay Summit]

I stifled my

voice with my hands.

I wasn’t sure why

I felt like crying.

Even though we

had a completely different situation, I couldn’t stop myself from feeling a deep

sense of empathy that made me happy right now.

[As I thought, I

really do love cosplay. That’s why I’m sure that if I let go of this chance and

let other people take my place, I would feel nothing other than regret.]

Yeah.

I understand, Kaho-chan.

[That’s why even

though there might be a lot of people who say that I’m not suited for this…even

so, I still want to go. Since it’s a place I’ve always yearned for.]

Yeah, yeah.

Other people had

nothing to do with this. Because that was what it meant by ‘liking’ something.

I bet it would be

far more nerve-wrecking considering the huge stage. If it was me, I bet I would

be frozen solid even if it was only a rehearsal. But Kaho-chan was different

from me. Since she had slowly accumulated everything to allow her to grace that

stage.

That’s why I would

definitely cheer on you, Kaho-chan.

Since I would

definitely support my precious friends.

[—so, Rena-chin.

I ask you to lend me your strength once again. Together with me, let’s enter

the Makuhari Cosplay Summit!]

………huh?

I kept re-reading

the message. And then, I bent my neck.

“What’s the

meaning of…….together…..?”

*****

Translator's Note:

The next release would be delayed for quite a bit so forgive me for the inconvenience. Wish you all a pleasant winter holiday and Merry Christmas!

For more detailed info about the novel, click

here

Credit:

TL and everything else: Meatbun

Proofread: Lyra