Chapter 5

I'm not sure who said it, but there's a saying that in this world, there are two pigs: one fat and one thin. When they chase the rising sun, the one that runs faster is always the thin pig...

Zhao Yougong believed this saying, so he put a big "Zhao" character on the head of the thin pig. But once the two pigs started running, Zhao Yougong realized he had been tricked. The black, fat pig was now running at the front, its hooves moving swiftly, as if it were basking in the glory of a victorious run. The way it ran made it look like a little calf. As for the thin pig with the "Zhao" character, it was running at a leisurely pace, and every now and then, it would stop to root around in the feet of the onlookers, as if it were looking for food.

Zhao Yougong felt he was doomed to lose, and the thought of having to kiss the pig's head was more humiliating than pretending to be crazy. The young prince gritted his teeth, tucked up his robe, and tucked his folding fan into his belt, then he sprinted after the thin pig. To avoid becoming the first hero in Bianliang to kiss a pig's head, Zhao Yougong had to find a way to make the thin pig run. After just a few steps, he felt an urge to sit on the ground and cry. The thin pig, for some reason, stopped by the roadside and grunted, while a handsome young man with a fair complexion squatted beside it, rolling up his sleeves and extending a delicate hand holding a piece of green vegetable leaf.

Looking at the fair-faced young man, Zhao Yougong instinctively thought of the words "absolute beauty." The young man had fine eyebrows, a red-lipped mouth, and eyes like shining gems. He squatted there, his blue robe trailing on the ground, his slender waist like a willow swaying in the wind, and his small mouth slightly pouting, exuding a touch of charm.

Zhao Yougong felt deeply envious of this absolute beauty. How could a man look so perfect? How could other men in the world survive?

Zhao Yougong had absolute confidence in his own appearance. Although he couldn't compare to Song Yu or Pan An, in terms of charm and handsomeness, there were few in Bianliang who could match him. But today he had met his match. This absolute beauty seemed to have appeared out of nowhere, and he was clearly there to steal the spotlight. Zhao Yougong felt that this young man was even more beautiful than Li Shishi.

"Ah!" Zhao Yougong scratched his head and drew a small breath, because he felt that this absolute beauty was very familiar.

The thin pig happily rooted and ate the green vegetable leaf, and the absolute beauty found it very amusing. Without turning his head, he extended his hand backward, and someone handed him a few whole green vegetables.

The thin pig ate happily, and Zhao Yougong's eyes sparkled, his hands trembling. It was indeed a glutton. If it didn't start running soon, the fat pig would reach the Xiefang Tower. Just as he was about to kick the thin pig's buttocks, he noticed the attendant behind the absolute beauty. Wasn't that Xiao Tan? Zhao Yougong, who often frequented the Xiefang Tower, naturally recognized Xiao Tan. He then carefully examined the fair-faced young man squatting on the ground. No wonder he felt familiar; wasn't this the head courtesan of the Xiefang Tower, Cui Nian'nu?

"Nian'nu, let go of my pig. Are you trying to make me lose on purpose?" Zhao Yougong was angry. Even if Cui Nian'nu was a courtesan, did that give her the right to stop his thin pig? This was a race, and if he lost, he would have to kiss the pig's head. Zhao Yougong would rather lose all his wealth than be the loser.

Zhao Yougong's voice was not low, and many people turned to look, especially Cai and Gao Yannai. They ignored the fat pig at the front and stared intently at Cui Nian'nu.

In contrast, Cui Nian'nu remained calm. She was used to the gazes of men. Although she was second to Li Shishi, there were many men who wanted her. During each reception, these men would talk about poetry and literature, but their eyes would reveal a lecherous light, as if they wanted to strip her and devour her.

Cui Nian'nu looked down on these men, but she knew that one day, her body would end up in their hands. She was the incomparable Nian'nu and the cash cow of the Xiefang Tower. Even Li Shishi couldn't escape the fate of marriage, so what more could she expect? Cui Nian'nu ignored the greetings of Cai and Gao Yannai, placed the remaining vegetables on the ground, and lifted her head slightly.

"Prince, I am helping you. Look at how hungry your pig is," Nian'nu smiled lightly, her face showing two small dimples, but her deep eyes had a hint of cunning.

What a beautiful woman, what a charming presence. Zhao Yougong couldn't help but feel a tremor in his heart. Compared to Li Shishi, Nian'nu was much better at capturing a man's heart. If it were a few hundred or even a thousand years earlier, would she be Daji, Bao Si, or Yang Guifei?

In the north, there is a beauty, unmatched and independent, whose glance can captivate a city, and whose second glance can captivate a nation! At this moment, Nian'nu had the capital to enchant all. Her beauty was so captivating that the words "captivating and enchanting" suited her perfectly...

Which man doesn't love beauty, especially a seasoned player like Zhao Yougong? In a daze, he squatted beside Cui Nian'nu, gently stroking the thin pig's neck, "Nian'nu, I can't lose..."

Just seven words, but they were incredibly powerful. For a moment, Cui Nian'nu thought she had heard wrong. She wanted to look closely at Zhao Yougong, but at that moment, the young prince lowered his head. His eyes were only on the thin pig, and he mumbled something. Then he took out a small porcelain bottle from his chest. He uncorked it, and a strong medicinal scent filled the air. Pouring it out, Zhao Yougong now held several small yellow pills.

At this moment, everyone was focused on Cui Nian'nu, and no one noticed what Zhao Yougong was doing. But Cui Nian'nu did. She saw a flash of a sinister look on Zhao Yougong's face, a look of determination that was brief but intense. Was this young prince really as useless as he appeared?

Cui Nian'nu stood up and took a step back. She frowned slightly and said, "Prince, if you win, I will treat you to a drink!" With that, she led Xiao Tan away from the crowd.

No one knew why the beautiful Nian'nu left, and no one knew what Zhao Yougong had done. But Cui Nian'nu knew. Zhao Yougong had given the thin pig several "Golden Gun Unyielding Pills." The "Golden Gun Unyielding Pills" were known as the best aphrodisiac in the capital. Giving several to a pig was a crazy act, but often, it's in the crazy moments that miracles happen. Nian'nu wanted to see a miracle, to prove that she hadn't misjudged him.

Turning around, the thin pig had started running again. Watching Zhao Yougong running behind the pig, Nian'nu smiled slightly. This young prince was interesting.

Although the courtesan of the Xiefang Tower had promised a beautiful reward, no one believed it would come true, as the thin pig was already far behind. In another quarter of an hour, the fat pig would reach the Xiefang Tower.

Gao Yannai was also running, but his body was fat, and he ran like an old lady taking a stroll. Despite this, Gao Yannai was not worried. He puffed out his belly and occasionally stopped to wipe his sweat. He was certain he would win, and Zhao Yougong would have to kiss the thin pig.

With the cool spring breeze, the thin pig ran faster and faster. In the end, it was running as fast as a dog. No one expected this to happen. What had happened? Did the few vegetables Cui Nian'nu fed the pig have some magical effect?

The thin pig's eyes were red, and its hooves moved swiftly. Its agile form made people forget it was a pig. It was getting closer to the fat pig, but the Xiefang Tower was also in sight. The thin pig was running fast, but the distance of several dozen feet was not easy to make up!

Looking at the Xiefang Tower, Zhao Yougong stopped and spat on the ground. Damn it, even after giving the "Golden Gun Unyielding Pills" to the thin pig, was it still going to lose?

"Grunt... grunt..." The closer they got to the destination, the more the thin pig refused to run. It stood in place, raising its head and grunting sharply. Zhao Yougong wanted to curse, but before he could open his mouth, something miraculous happened.

As if summoned, the fat pig in front also stopped and turned around to run back. Zhao Yougong's mouth nearly dropped open in surprise. Gao Yannai's mouth was wide enough to swallow a duck egg. What was happening? He strained his eyes and shouted, but the fat pig ignored him and continued to run back until it reached the thin pig.

"Damn beast, damn beast, run! If you don't run, I'll stew you..." Gao Yannai, out of breath, ran up and hit the fat pig with a willow branch. The fat pig grunted and ignored him. Being ignored by a pig, Gao Yannai was so angry that he laughed. He rolled up his sleeves and pushed the pig's buttocks, determined to drag the fat pig to the Xiefang Tower.

Seeing Gao Yannai's actions, Zhao Yougong was not going to sit idly by. He ran over and kicked the thin pig's buttocks. The kick was strong, and the thin pig, in pain, turned its head, "Grunt... grunt..."

"Look at what? If you don't run, I won't find you a mate..." As if understanding Zhao Yougong's words, or perhaps because the thin pig was too hot-tempered, the thin pig wagged its tail and ran forward like a shooting star, not stopping for a long distance. It passed the Xiefang Tower, and the fat pig, stubbornly, followed behind.

Even with two lives, Zhao Yougong couldn't understand what was happening, but it didn't matter. What mattered was that he had won.

Standing at the entrance of the Xiefang Tower, surrounded by onlookers, the girls on the balcony called out in a sweet voice, "Oh, a pig race? This is the first time I've seen it. Which of the two young gentlemen won?"

The girls' question made Gao Yannai's fat face turn a deep red. He couldn't kiss a pig, so he trembled and looked at Zhao Yougong, "Zhao Yougong, I lost. I'll give you ten thousand strings of cash..."

"Stop, fatso, what do you mean? We agreed that the loser would kiss the pig. Besides, if I lost, what would you have chosen? Ten thousand strings of cash or watching me kiss the pig?"

"You..." Gao Yannai couldn't answer, because he knew the answer. If he had won, he would have given up ten thousand strings of cash just to see Zhao Yougong humiliated, "Are you really going to fight to the death with me?"

"Spit! Don't be so dramatic. Are you a beauty? Hurry up, I want to see the kiss. Oh, right, where are the two pigs?"

Zhao Yougong shouted, and the onlookers remembered the two pigs. Looking closely, they saw an embarrassing scene. Not far away, the two pigs were in an awkward position, the thin pig's hooves raised, its lower body pressed against the fat pig's buttocks, and something was moving up and down. The thin pig was actually mating with the fat pig on the street. Was the "Golden Gun Unyielding Pills" so powerful?

"Oh... can't look!" The girls blushed, waving their handkerchiefs and saying they wouldn't look, but in fact, they were laughing so hard they couldn't stop.

In the capital, there were no shortage of rascals, but no matter how rascally, they had to follow the rules of the rascals, which was to honor their bets. Zhao Yougong wouldn't let Gao Yannai off, so Gao Yannai had no choice. Feeling the intense gazes, Gao Yannai walked step by step toward the two pigs, his heart burning with anger but no place to vent. Facing the two pigs, he could no longer hold back and kicked the thin pig's buttocks hard.

"Oink... oink..." The thin pig let out a painful squeal, but fortunately, its vital parts were not damaged. At this moment, without Zhao Yougong's prompting, the crowd began to chant, "Gao Yannai, kiss! Gao Yannai, kiss... oh..."

Kiss or not? Gao Yannai was in a dilemma. Looking at the "Gao" character on the fat pig's head and the drooling pig's mouth, Gao Yannai suddenly felt like vomiting. "Oh..." He swallowed hard and tried to calm himself. Kiss or not, it wouldn't kill him. Closing his eyes, he leaned in to kiss the pig.

Thinking this, Gao Yannai really closed his eyes, frowned, and hugged the pig's head, kissing it with a fearless attitude. "Smack," and then Gao Yannai squatted on the ground, vomiting.

The crowd erupted in applause, but to Gao Yannai, it felt like thousands of knives were stabbing his heart.

Everything was over, but Zhao Yougong felt a hollow feeling in his heart. Turning around, he was about to enter the Xiefang Tower when a loud scream came from behind. The voice belonged to Gao Yannai. Zhao Yougong was curious; who would dare to attack Gao Yannai in his rage?

Turning around, Zhao Yougong was stunned. The thin pig had pounced on Gao Yannai, its mouth tightly biting his arm. Seeing this, Zhao Yougong burst into laughter. Gao Yannai, Gao Yannai, what did you do wrong? You actually competed with the thin pig for a mate. Now you're in trouble.

"Help... kill... kill... I want to eat stewed pig's feet tonight, stewed pig's feet..."

Gao Yannai roared, his eyes filled with tears. He had never suffered such a humiliation in his life. Kissing a sow was bad enough, but being bitten by a boar...