Chapter 47

Translated by boilpoil Edited by boilpoil

Shi Cangyuan felt like saying something several times but says nothing in the end.

My goodness. I thought my heart had already been filled up completely, but it turns out there was more room for expansion, to fall even further in.

It takes him a while to find his own normal voice back again, and says in a joking tone, “you gotta be responsible for what you said.”

Yet Bai Lianhua actually doesn’t immediately avoid and dodge the bullet in a fright, instead, while his body still goes as stiff as a piece of log, he’s still doing his best to keep eye contact with Shi Cangyuan.

It turns out Shi Cangyuan is the one to dodge Bai Lianhua’s gaze first this time.

He still tries to say in a cheerful tone, “you said I should live the way I want to…”

“And the plans for my life clearly involve you.”

“Are you implying something?”

He mumbles in a self-degrading tone, “And the words ‘I like you’ should never be said casually in front of me… You’ll make me misunderstand that you also fell in love with me.”

Shi Cangyuan’s calm expression clearly gave way to some inquisitiveness and carefulness.

He’s as if doing his best to suppress himself in the presence of something he desperately wants but doesn’t dare to extend his hand to touch.

Bai Lianhua bites his lips, “then for you, what is the definition of like?”

“I will feel happy when I see you proud and energetic; I will feel sad when I see you wounded and exhausted; I will feel anxious when I see you sortie. My emotions keep being tugged at by you… Is this like?”

Shi Cangyuan appears stunned. He takes a deep breath and says, “yes.”

“Even if the start of all this is out of a sense of guilt?”

“… Still yes.” Shi Cangyuan can already see what’s coming next, even if he finds it hard to believe.

Bai Lianhua smiles, shallow dimples appearing, “then yes… Yes. I feel like, I love you too.”

“Do everything that you want to… I promise you, no matter what, I really won’t leave this time.”

Just after he says it, before Shi Cangyuan can react, the system can’t suppress its shock anymore.

“Holy shit! Host, you actually said like yourself?!”

Nice one Shi Cangyuan, what a proud moment for the antagonists… Gods, can it perhaps expect that if this goes on it might be able to see the host cornered and defeated?

Exciting!

“But… what’s with letting the antagonist do what he wants, jeez, host, that’s the wrong way to treat your mission!”

Bai Lianhua doesn’t pay attention to the system’s rantings. He is still focused completely on Shi Cangyuan.

Yet the Shi Cangyuan that has kept the initiative and pace of the interaction between the two of them since Bai Lianhua’s return has currently just gone stiff right this moment, losing his casual self that is always in control of the situation.

Bai Lianhua’s words were stupefying.

It’s what he’s always wanted, and he should take this chance to strike while the iron is hot, and ask for more miles with this inch. Yet Shi Cangyuan realises that he can’t do it at all.

All his schemes and plans seem to have been zeroed out right now. There’s just pure joy and extreme fear left in his mind right now.

Is this real?

Not just a wild hallucinating daydream he’s having?

Shi Cangyuan’s voice is so quiet it’s almost inaudible, “I really will take this at face value.”

Bai Lianhua nods without hesitation, “then do. I am serious.”

“Even if my heart really were a tough, hard piece of rock… You’ve won. You’ve found the gap to crack it open.”

Looking at Shi Cangyuan, he is reminded of the antagonists of the other worlds that have said similar things to him… What’s unexpected is that there’s also a day when he will say something like that.

Shi Cangyuan who’s quite sensitive immediately understands that his intentional actions were all seen through by Bai Lianhua. He’s seen through him… Which makes it suddenly unbearable to look at Bai Lianhua’s still crystal-clear eyes.

Why would there be people that came with ulterior motives to still have such clear eyes that can seemingly reflect all the negativities in people’s hearts?

——It’s like saying quietly, I know everything. I know you’re acting and biding your plans, but I still get caught obediently. So, what are you going to do next? Do you plan to hurt me?

All his scheming self thus exposed to the sunlight like so for all to see… makes Shi Cangyuan feel that he’s really ugly for some reason.

How odd it is that they might both have ulterior motives, but one would always feel that they’re the worse one here among them.

“No. It’s still my loss.”

Bai Lianhua “???”

Shi Cangyuan’s sudden unexpected response makes Bai Lianhua confused… loss? What did Shi Cangyuan lose?

Shi Cangyuan doesn’t seem to want to explain though, instead, he says with a serious expression, “right. I will listen to you. I will live the way I want to…”

“But what I want is actually the same as you.”

Bai Lianhua widens his eyes in shock.

“Everyone would have wanted to save the world when they were young. Now, I just had the chance to turn this dream into reality.”

“I can drive the best mecha of the empire, and enjoy the feeling of unrivalled-ness on the battlefield. Now, I also have you.”

Bai Lianhua still feels uncomfortable, “but…”

Shi Cangyuan chuckles, “no buts. This is what I want.”

“My young self wanted the best mecha of the empire, to prove myself on the battlefield, to be the strongest one in the empire. My older self wants to be with you… Now, I’ve got both. Why could I possibly still feel dissatisfied with?”

Bai Lianhua seems dumbfounded. He’s completely unable to ascertain whether these feelings of Shi Cangyuan are genuine, but he finds himself unable to counter.

The system that’s held its breath has popped up again.

“Amazing. Host, you didn’t actually plan this, right?”

What an unexpected development… With a step back as his offence, completely intimidating the antagonist into falling for him completely… Now the antagonist would never ever do antagonistic things again.

His whole mental defence has been brought down already, you see?

What a divine aura that the white lotus has…

#I’m still untainted and gentle and well as always, and you’ve already thrown away your weapons to swear allegiance to me#

Shocking. Truly shocking.

Bai Lianhua still seems dazed, “but I didn’t…” He had really prepared for this mission to fail, to give Shi Cangyuan freedom.

He also doesn’t understand how this situation turned out so.

System “…”

Emm… It’s because you didn’t that is even more impressive.

To affect people unintentionally is an even more lethal method.

What’s still quite soothing is that, uh, the antagonist’s scheming attempt to capture him didn’t completely fail, and it’s barely some kind of… win-win?

——Oof, no no. It’s still a bit weird to call it a win-win.

… The mecha pilots of the empire led by Shi Cangyuan spent almost 20 years to beat the insectoids that have grown arrogant with their second wave of evolution back into submission.

He stayed active on the battlefield until the second wave ended and these second evolved insectoid elites have stopped appearing. Then he moved to the background.

Thus Shi Cangyuan also becomes the person to have piloted ‘Dicarus’ for the longest duration in the entire empire’s history. In his hands, ‘Dicarus’ also received timely modifications that made it stronger and stronger over time.

‘Dicarus,’ that people thought with the advancement that technology would also become outdated and retire from history, has become the number one mecha that will always stay on active duty.

In the end, it’s no longer ‘Dicarus’ that is giving glory to Shi Cangyuan, but instead, it is because of Shi Cangyuan, that ‘Dicarus’ has become the eternal symbol and idol of the next generation in the empire’s population.

After Shi Cangyuan has completely let go of ‘Dicarus,’ there’s still countless mecha designers idolising him that did their best to keep ‘Dicarus’ at top shape, and countless mecha pilots that work their best with the grandest goal of winning the pilotship of ‘Dicarus’ through the competitions.

The number one mecha that was once the factor that caused Shi Cangyuan’s lifelong tragedy in the original timeline has now been associated exclusively with Shi Cangyuan now.

Shi Cangyuan, the God of War known galaxy-wide also has a well-known, loving relationship with his partner, Bai Lianhua.

Everyone knows that when Shi Cangyuan was at his life’s lowest, Bai Lianhua acted as his best friend and doctor; at his fights against the insectoids, he’s his most compatible adjutant; at his retirement into a researcher of mechas, he’s his best colleague in his research.

Bai Lianhua had a lot of roles, but what’s unchanging is that he’s the one Shi Cangyuan placed at the bottom of his heart.

Shi Cangyuan has said many times himself that Bai Lianhua is the shiniest star to descend from the sky for him.

…

Bai Lianhua stayed with Shi Cangyuan in this world until they were old.

On his deathbed, Shi Cangyuan took Bai Lianhua’s hand, and says, “there’s been one thing, that I’ve never told you… Because I was afraid you’d despise me for it.”

Bai Lianhua looks at him, perplexed.

Shi Cangyuan hesitates a bit, before saying, “it’s about why you were back.”

Bai Lianhua is stunned. This is a topic they’ve never brought up in a really, really long time.

“Remember when I told you I’m willing to walk whatever path you set for me, good or bad, even if I had to take a long fall after I’ve reached the peak?”

“I really once thought so… Even in the early days I was waiting for such a twist…”

“I’m sorry I had ever thought like this, like I didn’t trust you.”

“I couldn’t help it. Everything was so perfect, that it was unreal. Like the mirage in a mirror, that it would shatter at the slightest poking.”

“But no. I actually did just spend my life with you together like a dream.”

Bai Lianhua is shocked. He never knew that’s what Shi Cangyuan once thought… He’s not shown it at all in front of him.

He’s bitter, but still says, “no. There’s nothing to be sorry for. I know you don’t mean it.”

“Look, there’s no twist… Perhaps I really did come for you with ulterior motives, but I really did hope that you can have a bright, happy life.”

Shi Cangyuan’s lips perk up, “you’ve succeeded.”

“Every day I’ve spent with you were the most dazzling days I’ve ever had.”

He’s lying down in silence, looking at Bai Lianhua with an unmoving gaze. A gentle, melancholic expression on his face, overlapping with the refreshing sunlight that’s coming in through the windows, as if to show how dazzling it was for him… Then, without being able to control it, his gaze starts to lose focus, becoming dispersed and dimmed. In the end, he closed his eyes in peace.

Shi Cangyuan’s smile never faded away.

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