Chapter 2

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Chapter 2- I am a capable little overlord!

The next day, Mother Hong dropped Hong Ershao off. Before she left, Mother Hong didn’t forget to hold Teacher Tian’s hand and thanked him again,

“Teacher Tian, thank you so much. You don’t know this, but our family’s Ershao never liked to eat much and caused me to worry immensely. However, I didn’t after only one day of kindergarten that she would actually ask me to buy teddy bear crackers for her! Oh, my heart almost floated up to the heavens!”

“Haha, is that so….”

Teacher Tian smiled dryly, the corners of his mouth twitching as he looked over at the small package in Hong Ershao’s hand that was pointed towards Zitong’s direction. He sighed, I’m afraid it’s because Tong Tong is the one who wants to eat them instead.”

After Mother Hong left, Teacher Tian briefly said a few words and then left them to their own devices, saying something about a free period. After the teacher left, Zitong snorted softly, pursed her small mouth and rested her butt onto the blue table, her overlord aura returning,

“Alright, everyone, take them out!”

Hong Ershao blinked and looked at Zitong and then turned to look at the children around her. Everyone seemed used to this and with their heads down, they took out all kinds of snacks from the pockets of their small backpacks. There were slices of apple pie, chocolate, white rabbit candy [1]….and almost subconsciously, Hong Ershao also placed the teddy bear crackers onto the table with her chubby hands.

Zitong wore a pink and plush short skirt as she walked along with the blue table like a little princess. Holding out her own small backpack, she scooped up each person’s‘ ‘tribute’ one by one. Furthermore, every time she took one of the snacks, she also didn’t forget to do what the princesses did on TV and planted a kiss on each child’s forehead while saying,

“Oh, may the Lord bless and protect you!”

Hong Ershao raised her head and stared at Zitong in a daze. Zitong smiled gracefully as her little skirt switched in a beautiful arc and she kissed each child like a goddess blessing her flowers. She could almost see the white angel wings appear behind Zitong and a halo form above her head. What a beautiful and compassionate girl! She must be a fairy who had descended from the heavens! Who knew that angelic aura would only flash twice before the sound of a heartbreaking cry broke through Hong Ershao’s fantasy.

“Pipi, you idiot! How many times have I told you that that chocolate has to be Dove chocolate, so what is this? Ah?!! Do you want to anger me to death?”

“Waaaa-”

Pipi’s cheeks were stretched out left to right ruthlessly and in Zitong’s hands, it looked like she was kneading dough. Zitong listened to his crying impatiently and let go. She lifted her leg and swung in the direction of his butt,

“Are you even a boy? My dad says that real men do not cry easily or something like that!” [2]

Pipi grew irritable at Zitong’s bullying and rubbed his small red face in a rare protest,

“I am a boy! You are just a witch, an old witch! Bullying me every day, I’m going to tell my mother!”

Zitong had never had anyone contradict her like this before and her eyes widened, a shocked expression on her face. A little girl in pink clothes named Tong Yan nodded sympathetically at her and whispered,

“This is real!”

“Pipi!!!!!! I will beat you to death!!!!!”

“Ahhhhhhhhh, I want my mommy-”

“Wuwuwuwuw——I won’t do it I again, Tong Tong, I will never dare to do it again! Dove chocolate, I will remember it—-”

Hong Ershao stared dumbfoundedly and Tong Yan stepped forward to pat Hong Ershao’s shoulder as she said happily,

“Ershao, welcome to Tong Tong’s kindergarten!”

“….”

Maybe because Pipi has beaten up violently again this morning, Hong Ershao felt a little frightened. During lunch, she deliberately sat in the corner but Zitong wandered over with her own princess-styled plates and sat down next to her. Her bright eyes flickered as she stared excitedly at Hong Ershao without blinking.

“Urgh….”

With Zitong sitting next to her for no apparent reason, Hong Ershao began to feel anxious and felt like there was a fishbone stuck in her throat. When she looked up, she stared directly into Zittong’s two big eyes that shined brightly like a lightbulb. Hong Ershao thought about it for a long time before automatically picking up her braised chicken drumstick and handing it to Zitong,

“Tong Tong, this is for you.”

Using a small spoon to press again the chicken leg that was still sitting in Hong Ershao’s spoon, she asked with a puzzled face,

“Ershao, are you not going to eat this? Are you really not going to eat this?”

Hong Ershao looked embarrassed. She actually wanted to take back her spoon, but she pouted and whispered,

“I don’t like it……”

“Cough, is that so, well then as a good person I will help you eat it.”

“….”

Hong Ershao could only watch helplessly as her only meat dish was swallowed by Zitong and sighed. She lowered her head and obediently ate her potato shreds. However, after a while, Hong Ershao felt that something was wrong. How come the more she ate, the more potato shreds appeared? Ershao looked up with a puzzled expression at Zitong, only to see that she was smiling back at her.

“Ershao, since I ate your chicken, it is only fair that I give you my potato shreds. You also have to eat more and it isn’t good to have anything leftover or else Teacher Tian will scold you.”

“….”

After saying so, she held up her head using her pair of chubby arms and watched Hong Ershao with a spark of interest, her heart feeling so satisfied like it would burst into bubbles.

Haha, I finally found a fool who won’t curse or fight back no matter what I do!

After lunch, a beautiful and young teacher walked in with a book for storytime. The children had been tossing and running around, so they were a little tired by now. They all sat on small benches as they looked up at the female caretaker with anticipation.

Since this kindergarten was just remodeled, all the caretakers and teachers were new. The female teacher’s surname was Wang and they previously had been warned by Teacher Tian to treat this trouble class with caution. However, looking at their little angelic faces, the proud feeling of being a teacher sprung up inside her heart and caused her to forget about Teacher Tian’s warning. She opened the book excitedly and began to tell everyone the story of the thirsty crow.

“Once upon a time there was a crow and it was very thirsty….”

“Teacher, this is very boring. We already heard this story from our preschool teacher.”

Just as the story began, Tong Yan interrupted and waved her small arm impatiently in the air. How could the teacher tell this kind of childish story to them? Did she still think of them as gullible children?

The gentle Teacher Wang felt embarrassed and turned the page as she skipped to the next story,

“There used to be a little girl who sold matches. In the wintertime, there were no warm clothes for her to wear and she shivered in the old pair of slippers she had as she sold matches in the bitter cold air….”

This time, the upset Zitong stood up and stretched out her Pleasant Goat and Big Bad Wolf [3] slippers, showing them to her teacher.

“Teacher, my mother said that I can buy a small skirt with these shoes? So why is the match girl so stupid that she didn’t buy clothes first? Also, she actually bought a pair of old and big slippers instead?!”

“….”

“Once upon a time, there was an old grandpa who planted seven seeds that produced seven gourds and seven babies popped out of those gourds. The first baby had herculean strength and the second baby….”

Tong Tong stood up again and acting like a tiny adult, shook her head,

“Teacher, that is just CGI, something made to deceive children, how can you still believe in them?”

Teacher Wang cried and threw the book in her hand onto the ground. She ran out of the classroom and into the principal’s office,

“I’m not doing this anymore! I quit! I don’t care how much my salary is!”

Meanwhile, in the middle of the classroom, Zitong folded her hands and stood on the table like an old Buddha as she said,

“The teacher is gone. Everyone, let’s continue to play~”

“….”

When she finished, Zitong turned around to find Ershao and grabbed her hand with a smile,

“Ershao, mom said that people will only love those who are capable, so tell me, are you falling more in love with me?”

Hong Ershao’s legs went soft and she looked up at Zitong. In a small voice, she asked,

“Tong Tong, I need to pee. Is that okay?”

Afterward, the children were rounded up and sent to take their afternoon nap in another room. Before closing the door, the caretaker in charge of guarding the door stopped the sleepy Tong Tong who asked

“What do you want?”

Tong Tong looked up at the caretaker.

The caretaker smiled flatteringly and took out a lollipop that she set in Zitong’s hand and whispered,

“Tong Tong, Auntie is very sleepy today. I want to take a quick nap, so can you help auntie watch the children sleep and make sure they don’t run out?”

Zitong looked up at the caretaker with her big watery eyes and shook her head,

“For one lollipop? No.”

“…..”

Finally, Zitong walked in with a lollipop in her mouth and another two in her hand, She swaggered into the room under the envious gazes of the other children.

“Listen up! If anyone dares to sneak out, I will beat them to death!”

Zitong shouted with her loudest voice and nodded and smiled in satisfaction when she saw the children’s fearful expressions. She jumped into her bed, took out her small backpack, and started looking through today’s tributes. After a little while, her mouth was stuffed full and Pipi who was in the bed next to her, shrank back into his blankets as he stared with his blinking black eyes,

Is it that delicious?

Zitong had eaten half of her snacks when the Hong Ershao’s bed that was across from her creaked loudly. She had gotten out and rubbed her eyes as she walked barefooted across the floor, but she quickly sobered up at the screaming Zitong’s voice,

“Ershao! Where are you going? Don’t you know you’re disturbing the other children’s sleep? Go back to bed!”

The effect of her voice was astounding as more than twenty children woke up. They rubbed their eyes and looked at Zitong in fear. Hong Ershao only grunted and whispered,

“Tong Tong, I-”

A box of cookies flew in the air and hit the middle of Hong Ershao’s head. She yelped and endured the pain as she crawled back to her bed.

Problem solved, Zitong went back to eating her snacks. Pipi looked up, glancing sympathetically at the Hong Ershao who was biting her cup as she held back tears. He opened her mouth and tried to speak up for her, only to turn back when he saw Tong Tong glaring at him fiercely. Pipi was startled and retreated back into his bed,

“Tong Tong, I-”

“Ershao, don’t force me to treat you like Pipi!”

“….”

She didn’t know why, but today Hong Ershao felt a strong desire to get out of the bed. After being intimidated by Zitong’s glare a few more times, she finally took a deep breath and her hand clutched at her quilt as her eyes hardened and her body softened.

Pipi looked at Hong Ershao with surprise, she—–what is she doing?

After stuffing the last marshmallow in her mouth, Tong Tong fell asleep due to a lack of brain oxygen supply. After an hour, the door finally opened and the caretaker came in, feeling refreshed after resting all afternoon. She smelled something weird as soon as she entered and she frowned as she followed the smell and saw the yellowed bed and a Hong Ershao who struck back pitifully, her pillow wet with her tears,

“Ershao, what happened here?”

“Auntie-”

Hong Ershao stretched out her two little arms and looked pitifully at the auntie. This expression made the auntie’s maternal instincts overflow and she hugged Hong Ershao into her arms. A patient expression appeared on her face and the auntie took a breath as she looked down and at her hands,

“Ershao, why did you wet yourself?!”

“It was Tong Tong….whaaaaa-! Tong Tong wouldn’t let me move!”

“….”

In the evening, when Mother Hong came to pick Ershao up, she heard what happened with surprise. Carrying the crying Hong Ershao, she gave Teacher Tian a puzzled look,

“Teacher Tian, our Ershao is the most obedient and disciplined child and she has never done did something like this before. Why would this suddenly happen today?”

Teacher Tian felt embarrassed as he rubbed his hand and said,

“Probably because she ate too many teddy bear crackers.”

“…..”

T/N notes:

[1] big white rabbit candy: It’s a famous candy brand that most Chinese kids grew up with.

[2] Real men do not cry easily: A Chinese saying that is similar to English version of ‘man up’. Yeah I know it’s hurtful, toxic masculinity and all that crap, but children don’t know better….heck, even in this day and age they still are harsher towards boys than girls

[3] Pleasant Goat and Big Bad Wolf: A Chinese cartoon that is basically about sheep vs wolf but humanized.

Also, this kindergarten class acts a lot like a cult…..

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