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004

He did not know when it started, but Xu Hao Ran could not tolerate his little Highness’ eyes having the figure of anyone else inside them more and more- every night he would think, perhaps it would be best if he were to imprison the Highness in a corner of the earth.

Even though he clearly knew that these kinds of thoughts were not right, he would still be unable to endure it, and could only desperately restrain it, and restrain himself. But on the next day, he would use those eyes of greed again, and brazenly size his(pos.) Highness up in the morning courts.

A sleeping beast like him, could only use a chain to drag himself at each and every moment.

But when the evidence was placed in front of him, it seemed as though the sleeping beast could not be contained inside the cage any longer, and was on the verge of breaking away from that cage.

“Do you really think he doesn’t know anything about your feelings? And how do you know if he isn’t deliberately using you?”

The face of the eldest apprentice brother that was never willing to get close to them had a smile, but inside it, seemed it carried implications of disdain and mockery, “Xu Hao Ran, just admit to your fate. As a person of the imperial household, what he is best at, is playing with people’s hearts.”

“If not for his consent, how could the life-saving rations once again and again be delayed? If he was not being deliberate, with your ability, how could it be dragged on to three years before you could return with triumph? While you were at the front line of the borderlands fighting for him, he instead guarded against you by going behind your back winning over power, and in the end, even wanted your life.”

“You really think the Xu family’s entire family was sentenced to death because they betrayed the country by communicating with the enemy? It was just that the previous Emperor was not accustomed to the Xu family gradually gaining power, and then only found this kind of reason to erase the Xu family. You really think, with everything that happened with such ease, who exactly do you think is behind backs that’s been the mastermind.”

“Do you find it to be terrifying now?” Chu Ze Yao got close to Xu Hao Ran’s ear and lightly laughed, “The person you liked, was not as perfect as you thought from the beginning. Since he was young, he schemed against people’s hearts, and schemed against you. Only you were still so foolish to think he was really that kind and timid, and got used by him like a knife.”

Xu Hao Ran’s face remained composed, but the hand that held the letter paper could not help but tremble, and his voice also quivered, “Eldest brother, don’t speak any more.”

How could he not know- the Emperor’s graces, were like a knife suspended over the head, capable of falling at any moment.

It was not as though these things could not investigated- it was just that he was never willing to use these things on the Emperor. However, why is it that, he would not just let him dream a moment longer?

Why would Chu Ze Yao tell him the truth- if one to say that it was due to the friendship between apprentice brothers, he would not believe it one bit. He looked at the young man in front, and said with confidence, “Eldest brother, you like Master.”

The face of the other person that had originally had a contemptuous smile had broke down in the next instant. His face slightly sunk, and also carried a sliver of anger, “Shut your mouth.”

“You like Master.” Xu Hao Ran was a bit confused, but also felt it to be funny, “You’re just like his Highness, liking Master.”

“But what of it- Master would never look at you even once.”

As though wild animals slaughtering each other, even though he himself was already clearly beaten black and blue, he just had to relentlessly tear out a wound on the other person’s body.

“No matter what, Master would not look at any person once.”

He had also clearly ruthlessly pierced the other person with a knife in the area where it hurt, but his own wounds were still dripping with blood onto the ground.

How could Xu Hao Ran not know- the Emperor’s graces for him were merely surface-level; and how could Chu Ze Yao also not know, there was never anyone who could be held in Master’s eyes.

What had truly drove Xu Hao Ran crazy, was not other people, but was Zhou Jun Yan.

That night was very beautiful- the eyes of the drunk little Highness was filled with billowing ripples. As he tightly held onto Master’s hand in front of Chu Ze Yao and him, he chattered on, as though setting free all the pressure he had accumulated.

“Since young, I would be jealous that Brother Hao Ran was able to obtain your good graces. At that time I thought, perhaps I was too young- if I was more outstanding, and even more outstanding, perhaps you would be able to part some of your gaze that you had on him onto me.”

“But no matter how hard I worked, you never did.”

“How laughable, that the person who obtained your favour would actually like me. Master, at that time, I thought- if he would be willing to do anything for me, then would you, also use the slightest spare vision to look at me?”

The little Highness had a really good-looking smile. Like a child ignorant of worldly affairs, his smile was clean and pure, but it made him shiver coldly, “Look, Master. Did I not do the best, and use the arts of an Emperor that you spoke of to the degree of a pure blue flame[1]. What they said was not wrong- I was naturally born to be suited for the Emperor’s throne, and take your most favourite person’s heart, and play with it until it got him spinning.”

“The Xu family was an eyesore for Father, so I used that opportunity[2] to add a criminal charge. What the funny part was, Xu Hao Ran had actually willingly become my blade, just like a lowly lap dog, and wag his tail towards me to please me.”

Don’t say it……

“When those Imperial Brothers were eager to make trouble, I only said a few words in front of him, and was able to get him to simply take on the charges of an executioner for it.”

I beg of you, don’t say any more……

“It was I who ordered the delivery of the rations to be delayed, even the few spies those times were also sent by me.” The callous and cruel Emperor seemed to not have detected his abnormality, and continued to gouge at his heart bit by bit, “At that time, I thought, it would be nice if he were to die at the borderlands. That way, you would be rid of the special exception, and no longer have anyone that would be in your eyes.”

“No more……”

He thought back to the eyes of the Xu family filled with blood as they were beheaded, the brothers in the deserts that were killed by enemy troops for protecting him, those countless icy cold nights, the soldiers guarding outside the city gates that were slaughtered, and the time everyone was sitting on the enemy troop corpses, laughing without restraint.

“General, after you return to the capital, what is it that you want to do most?”

What was it…… Xu Hao Ran had remembered at that time his hands were already frozen stiff, but when he recalled his little Highness, he still had a smile raised, “What I want to do most, of course, is to properly embrace my own lover, and tell him I’ve come back.”

The kind laughter that came up seemed as though it was just yesterday, but Xu Hao Ran could no longer hear it.

Countless brothers’ blood was exchanged for his return to the capital, so that he would be able to have a chance to hold his lover; but the result?

He knew everything. His(pos.) Highness also knew everything.

Xu Hao Ran blankly stared at the Emperor in front, and felt like he was a stranger. He heard the other person’s mocking sound of laughter, “My beloved subject Xu, why are you crying?”

Did he cry?

Xu Hao Ran did not know, but instead he felt his heart was in extreme pain, as though pierced by a dagger by someone. He offered his entire true heart to the other person, yet the other person stomped on it with force, and even felt it was not fulfilling enough, and needed to toss it towards the tip of a knife.

“Zhou Jun Yan, have you ever had even a moment of pity or remorse?”

Just say you do- If you do, I could still deceive myself, and pretend to not mind anything.

The Emperor laughed, as though laughing his foolishness, and also laughing as his true heart,

“Xu Hao Ran, exactly what kind of dream are you having?”

“Towards you, I never had a heart of unease or shame.”

[1] The expression is, the stove fire is a pure blue, meaning attaining mastery/perfection in the skill, to a high degree.

[2] To push a boat along the current- make use of a favourable opportunity to achieve one’s end (with little effort).

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