Chapter 38

High Cuilan was fine when she kept quiet, but as soon as she spoke, things went south.

Zhu Bajie was still enthusiastically preparing to tease Xiaobailong and Sun Wukong when she suddenly heard her beloved High Cuilan declare that she wanted to marry the man in front of her. Zhu Bajie almost spat out a mouthful of blood. This was a classic case of digging a hole for someone else only to have your own hole dug. What the hell, was there no justice in the world?

She angrily turned to glare at Tang Sen and roared, "Are you kidding me? You dare to tease my wife?"

"What? When did I tease your wife?"

"You still say you didn't tease her? My wife said she wants to marry you!"

"Hey, hey, she's just talking to herself. I didn't agree, and which eye did you see me teasing her with?"

"I don't care! You did tease her." Zhu Bajie raised her nine-toothed rake and swung it down at Tang Sen's head.

This woman was extremely powerful, her demonic energy spreading, and the nine-toothed rake was no ordinary weapon. It was cold and menacing. Just a casual swing made Tang Sen feel overwhelmed. But with the precedent of the All-Knowing and All-Powerful God, Tang Sen was mentally prepared and always on guard, ready to dodge. He sidestepped and narrowly avoided the attack.

Zhu Bajie wasn't an ordinary rookie. Missing her first move, she had a follow-up. As the rake missed, she kicked Tang Sen in the back. The kick aimed directly at his heart, and if it had landed, it would have caused serious injury.

But Tang Sen had a toy teddy bear on his back, acting like a giant shield. Zhu Bajie's foot hit the bear's chest, and the cotton inside cushioned the impact, making it soft and ineffective. She was startled, thinking Tang Sen was carrying some divine treasure, and quickly retracted her leg. However, the teddy bear wasn't a lifeless object. As it absorbed the kick, its two round, plump paws closed forward, grabbing Zhu Bajie's ankle.

This was completely unexpected. Caught off guard, she froze in a bizarre position, one foot lifted and the other on the ground. Fortunately, she was wearing jeans; if she had been wearing a skirt, her undergarments would have been exposed.

Tang Sen turned around and punched her in the chest.

There was no choice; you don't hit a woman's face, especially not a woman's. But if you don't hit the face, what else can you hit on a woman? So, he hit her chest!

Tang Sen felt his fist hit a soft, bouncy mass. The elasticity was better than the best spring. His fist sank deep into the flesh, as if being enveloped and drawn in, then the mass bounced back, pushing Tang Sen backward with great force, sending him flying and landing far away.

"Damn, that's possible?" Tang Sen was drenched in sweat.

"See, I told you that thing could be considered combat power," Sun Wukong said solemnly. "At least a ten percent boost."

Xiaobailong nodded. "Sister Wukong is right."

Tang Sen got up from the ground, furious. "Don't say such nonsense. It's because her divine power is stronger than mine, so she pushed me away. It has nothing to do with that thing. If her divine power were weaker, I would have knocked it off with one punch."

Sun Wukong, Xiaobailong, and even the teddy bear covered their faces. "Brother Tang Sen, that's too cruel. How can you knock a woman's chest off?"

Tang Sen realized he had misspoken and quickly shut up.

Sun Wukong made a claw gesture with both hands and said resentfully, "If I had a pair of those, I could kill gods and buddhas alike."

Tang Sen turned and shouted, "Don't talk nonsense."

Zhu Bajie, having sent Tang Sen flying, did not pursue. She was furious. "You... you... you man are too much. Not only did you tease my wife, but you also teased me? That's why I say men are too dirty, and women are the best."

"Hey, hey, where did I tease you? We were fighting for our lives, can we focus? Hey, hey, enemies, allies, even hostages... why can't all the girls focus?" Tang Sen looked up at the sky at a 45-degree angle, tears streaming down his face.

"Don't pretend to be tragic. You were teasing me just now... Forget it, it seems we are kindred spirits. I also love grabbing women's chests. Not long ago, I assaulted Chang'e's chest, and she reported me to the Jade Emperor. The Jade Emperor listed me as a wanted criminal and wanted to capture me. I had no choice but to run here."

Tang Sen: "..."

Sun Wukong: "..."

Xiaobailong: "..."

Tang Sen said weakly, "Last time I heard that Xiaobailong was listed as a wanted criminal by the Jade Emperor, I felt very sorry for her, but this time, I feel the Jade Emperor's punishment is not too harsh. Such a deranged yuri should be captured."

Xiaobailong nodded. "This woman deserves it."

Sun Wukong laughed. "Chang'e is indeed beautiful. If I were a man, I would also want to assault her chest, but for a woman, it's a bit... cough... I guess the Jade Emperor also felt that a yuri in the Heavenly Court was dangerous, so he wanted to capture her."

"The Jade Emperor felt it was dangerous?" Xiaobailong asked curiously.

Sun Wukong laughed. "Because the Jade Emperor's wife might also be assaulted. To keep his hat from turning green, the Jade Emperor had to deal with her."

Everyone suddenly understood and clapped, laughing. "That makes sense."

"Stop talking nonsense." Zhu Bajie straightened up, and her two large bosoms shook, the amplitude was terrifying, making Sun Wukong and Xiaobailong almost want to hide in the ground. She pouted. "I wouldn't assault the Jade Emperor's wife."

"Why not?" Tang Sen asked curiously. "Is the Jade Emperor's wife not beautiful?"

Zhu Bajie laughed. "Because I only assault the Jade Emperor himself. He is a beautiful girl, so where is the wife?"

Tang Sen: "..."

Sun Wukong shouted, "Hey, that's not right. 500 years ago, when I caused chaos in the Heavenly Palace, the Jade Emperor was clearly a middle-aged man. How did he become a girl in your mouth?"

Zhu Bajie was shocked, turned to look at Sun Wukong carefully, and exclaimed, "You... you are the demon king Sun Wukong who caused chaos in the Heavenly Palace 500 years ago, wielding a big stick?"

"No, I used a halberd back then."

"Stop lying. I clearly saw you wielding a big stick, and I even exchanged a few blows with you."

"Ah... you must have seen wrong. That's a slanderous rumor. I didn't cause chaos in the Heavenly Palace 500 years ago..." Sun Wukong rolled on the ground, holding his head.

"Hey, focus. You're off-topic again." Tang Sen was sweating. "We were talking about whether the Jade Emperor is a man or a woman, and you're talking about the big stick 500 years ago?"

Talking to these lunatics was too difficult. One wrong move and you'd be off-topic by a million miles. Tang Sen felt that going to the West wasn't hard; just choose a direction, get off-topic, and you'd end up at the Great Thunderclap Temple in the West...

Zhu Bajie laughed. "Demon King Sun Wukong, when you caused chaos in the Heavenly Palace 500 years ago, you met the 9829th Jade Emperor. Over the past 500 years, the Jade Emperor has reincarnated several times. Now, the 9835th Jade Emperor is in charge, and this one is a very beautiful young girl. I've been lusting after her, but she is well-guarded and used the Chang'e incident to make me a wanted criminal. Alas, I had to flee the Heavenly Palace... I won't have the chance to assault her again."

This woman truly deserved her punishment!

Tang Sen, Sun Wukong, and Xiaobailong shook their heads. "How did this menace escape to the human world? The Jade Emperor is too weak. He should have locked her up in the Heavenly Prison for life."

"Alright, enough talk." Tang Sen coughed. "Zhu Bajie, let's focus. We're here for High Cuilan. Release her, and we'll leave you alone. Otherwise, with the demon king Sun Wukong, who caused chaos in the Heavenly Palace 500 years ago, here, you might not get any benefit..."

As soon as he said this, the atmosphere became tense. Everyone had been joking, but now they all became serious, the air seemed to freeze. Gao Taigong hid behind a tree, and the All-Knowing and All-Powerful God's disciples hid far away.

Zhu Bajie turned to face Sun Wukong and coldly said, "Demon King Sun Wukong, now that you're free from the Five-Finger Mountain, you should return to Flower-Fruit Mountain and be the Great Sage Equal to Heaven. Why are you meddling in my affairs? I just want to marry a wife. What have I done to you?"