Chapter 15: Wife, hurry and gulp me

After finally arriving home from the long journey, An Xingzhou breathed a sigh of relief, placed Peng Ci on the floor first, and then began switching his shoes after placing the things he had brought to the side.

As soon as Peng Ci landed, it spread its little clawsies nimbly and hopped forward several steps. It shook its tail at An Xingzhou and hopped into the living room. Turning on the AC with a press of its claw, it then laid on the sofa with its belly facing up, snoring.

An Xingzhou organized the stuff while he silently glanced at the turned on AC, thinking that Peng Ci really was so familiar with everything that it easily made itself at home!

He folded the plastic bag Peng Ci got by selling its sexual appeal and body, stuffing it in the cabinet. Then he washed all the bowls and plates he bought. After hesitating for a bit, he took out a bottle of Cola from the refrigerator, poured it in a small, shallow bowl, and placed it on the living room table.

Peng Ci’s snoring made its belly rise and fall continuously. Seeing An Xingzhou come over, it immediately flipped over and got up. After An Xingzhou sat down, it crawled onto An Xingzhou’s thigh, using both its front and hind paws. Lying down properly on An Xingzhou’s leg, it curled into a little fluffy ball, and shook its short and round little tail.

An Xingzhou took out the rose silk scarf that it had taken off because of the heat and placed it on the side. He rubbed Peng Ci’s back and looked at its white fur, which was covered in dust, thinking that before he took a bath, he had to bathe Peng Ci first. Then he turned Peng Ci and put it on the table.

“Didn’t you say you wanted to drink Cola? I poured it for you.” An Xingzhou finished and asked a bit worriedly, “You rabbits can really drink Cola, right? You won’t die after drinking it, right?”

Peng Ci puffed and jumped a few times on the spot. “No! Peng Ci isn’t an ordinary little bunny bun!”

Peng Ci finished and hopped to the bowl, leaning its little head over.

The Cola had just been opened, the carbonic acid extremely strong and bubbling endlessly in the bowl.

Peng Ci had just leaned its head in, and a bubble exploded in front of it, scaring it so much that the half-standing Peng Ci fell backwards on its butt.

“…” An Xingzhou reached out and poked Peng Ci’s chubby butt, saying in amusement, “Impossible, you’re scared by this?”

“The bubble from just before wus——this——big!” Peng Ci shook its butt and stuffed its soft flesh into An Xingzhou’s hand. Its paws slapped the table, and it leaned forward again, extending its tongue to lick the Cola. Then it shrank back its tongue to flick its tongue cheerily, before once again extending its tongue to lick the Cola.

Peng Ci was extremely intoxicated from licking the Cola. The carbonic acid went to its head, and its tail and ears stood up straight with its paws spread apart. “Hahahaha… Cola tastes good… bleh bleh bleh…”

An Xingzhou: “?”

Peng Ci’s face was almost entirely buried in the bowl with only its small body and butt remaining outside. It licked the Cola while making slurping noises, retracting its head only after a long while. It let out a long burp and wanted to jump back into An Xingzhou’s embrace while shaking from side to side. But in the end, its feet slipped, and it almost fell under the table headfirst.

An Xingzhou, sharp-eyed and deft, caught Peng Ci and scooped it up, noticing that Peng Ci was dazed as if it were drunk. One of its long ears was standing up while the other drooped downwards, quivering. Its paws were even unconsciously kneading in midair.

An Xingzhou placed Peng Ci on his thigh, reached out to pick up the bowl of Cola Peng Ci had just drank from, and smelled it to confirm that he didn’t get the wrong bottle. This was just plain Cola! The type without alcohol!

Or did rabbits get drunk from drinking Cola?

An Xingzhou wasn’t a rabbit, so he didn’t understand either.

He could only lower his head and rub Peng Ci’s little stomach. “Are you okay? How did you end up this way from drinking Cola?”

“Huff huff…” Peng Ci’e eyes were half-open, and it blearily said, “Wife… hurry and gulp me…”

An Xingzhou’s hands shook, and he almost threw away the rabbit on his legs.

“What did you say?!” An Xingzhou poked Peng Ci’s head. “Don’t play dumb. What did you want me to do?!”

“Sob sob…” Peng Ci kicked its legs and said, “Gulp gulp… me…”

“You’re still small! And you’re even a little bunny! Peng Ci!” An Xingzhou pinched Peng Ci as he lifted it up, his gentleness from just now gone without a trace. He said fiercely, “You have the guts to think, you have the guts to have me “gulp gulp” you?! Did I indulge/spoil you too much today? Huh?? What strange things do you normally watch?!”

Peng Ci gave a start from An Xingzhou’s thundering roar. The carbonic acid it was on completely disappeared. It didn’t know what it said wrong that provoked An Xingzhou to lose his temper, and it clawed helplessly.

“Gulp gulp… burp——” Peng Ci’s throat was full of carbon dioxide bubbles, and it couldn’t stop gulping. It said aggrievedly, after letting out several consecutive burps, “I just wanted Wife to rub me… Wife, why did you get angry… gulp gulp——you got so angry…”

Hearing Peng Ci crazily make bubbles like a fish, An Xingzhou pondered for a moment and placed Peng Ci back on his thigh again quietly, acting like a good wife and a loving mother. He even wore a stiff smile as he gently smoothed Peng Ci’s fur, “Alright, I’ll rub you… I’ll rub you…”

“Gulp gulp…” Peng Ci completely didn’t know to stop before going too far. While being rubbed so comfortably it started to make bubbles, it still insisted on questioning further, “Then why did Wife yell at me just now?”

The hand that An Xingzhou was using to smooth its fur immediately stiffened. He quickly and randomly rubbed Peng Ci before saying, “Kids shouldn’t ask so many questions!”

After An Xingzhou finished talking, he secretly held his face in his hands in his mind. The dirty would see dirtiness. So the one with his mind in the gutter wasn’t Peng Ci but himself! He wasn’t clean anymore!

Peng Ci completely didn’t know that An Xingzhou was currently wildly scolding himself in his mind and opened its mouth to say, “Gulp gulp…”

An Xingzhou immediately pinched Peng Ci’s mouth, forcing it to shut its mouth.

“Mhm mhm?” Peng Ci stared at An Xingzhou in confusion, the gas in its stomach rushing up in one torrent after another. But its mouth was pinched shut and the gas couldn’t escape, so that torrent of gas could only flow back.

An Xingzhou only let go after seeing Peng Ci a little uncomfortable. But in the second after he let go, Peng Ci opened its mouth and let out a thundering “Gulp gulp!”

An Xingzhou: “…”

An Xingzhou quietly held his face in his hands. “Ci Ci, kids can’t go ‘gulp gulp’… Don’t gulp anymore, I’m begging you…”

“Huh?” Peng Ci tilted its head to the side, “Why not? Gulp gulp——I’m so gwassy…”

“Don’t ask anymore. Don’t ask anymore…” An Xingzhou thought that in the very second he opened the Cola for Peng Ci, everything was inevitable.

How could he tell a little bunny that in the filthy human world, the phrase “gulp gulp”had other meanings!

Author’s Note:

I learned the phrase “gulp gulp” from Ms. Jianglou… I immediately brought it over to taint everyone (not)

I’ll explain. “Gulp gulp” refers to the mouth, originating from not being able to speak clearly with the throat and mouth filled with a liquid. Gulp gulp…

Time to test everyone’s purity! Those that immediately understood, please type 1. Those who only understood after seeing the lesson, please type 2. Those who still don’t understand, please type 3 (There probably won’t be 3s, right?!)

Translator’s Note:

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