Chapter 17

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“Not possible.”

“Huh?”

One afternoon on a rare day off, I froze with my mouth agape at a witch. She was looking back at me like I was an idiot.

Tina was napping on the couch by the window because of the good weather… oi, don’t push your friend onto me!

I was drinking tea with Lucia.

Um… is it really not possible?

“Of course it’s impossible for a normal human to kill a witch. Maybe if you were a magician, you might have a chance, but it’s not possible for you.”

“No, but….”

I glanced at Tina. She was sleeping like a cat, enjoying the sunshine. She had been acting more and more like a cat these days.

But she was serious when I trained her and had been getting much better. I just had an overwhelming advantage because of my build.

Lucia seemed to understand what my glance meant and rolled her eyes.

“If you live with a witch, of course, they’d let their guard down sometimes, but if you make an enemy out of a witch, they’d never let you get anywhere near them. And what if they teleport or fly?”

“Oh.”

True! I’d be doomed if they fired magic at me from above. And I’m not that good with a bow.

I guess I can’t kill a witch then. I was taking reality too lightly…

Lucia split the baked sweets she was holding.

“Only a swordsman with the sword, Akacia, could kill a witch in close combat. You know about Akacia?”

“Nope.”

“It’s a long sword that gets passed down to each king in a country called Farsas. Nullifies magic. People call it the magician killer.”

“Could I borrow that?”

“Of course not, idiot.”

Don’t call me an idiot! She’s right, though!

Whatever. Long swords aren’t my forte anyway!

… But really, what should I do? I made such a big show to the violent princess, if I tell her it’s impossible now she’d kill me.

And if I tried to fight, I’d get killed by the witch.

Lucia balled up a paper and threw it at me. Um, that’s my payslip.

“Why are you worried? What are you, an idiot? You have something much better than the Akarcia.”

“Something better?”

What is it?

I didn’t have any poison daggers and my weapons were all standard ones. No weapons that could reach long ranges either.

I stared at Lucia blankly until she pointed her red painted fingernails towards the window. There was a small couch there and some catlike girl sleeping on it.

“You have her.”

An enchanting smile appeared on the witch’s face.

According to Lucia, witches weren’t all friends with each other.

Tina and Lucia were close, but that was unusual.

On the other hand, Tina and the witch in question were on bad terms, which was also unusual.

What’s even going on anymore!?

“I didn’t say anything that complicated. What are you, an idiot?”

“Shut up! Stop calling me an idiot, you idiot!”

“Oh? It’s been a while since anyone was reckless enough to call me an idiot.”

She snapped her fingers. My world changed completely.

Aargh! She’s hanging me upside down again!? But I’ve gotten used to hanging upside down from all the previous times! Serves you right!

I looked down on Lucia with triumph, but she seemed completely sick of me.

“Why do you look proud?”

“This isn’t enough to beat me!”

“Then should I strip you naked and show you to the world?”

“I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. Please forgive me.”

Think about my dignity as a human!

Over a year had passed since I started living with Tina, but I had never shown my naked body even to her!

Well… I’d be a criminal if I did. I won’t have to go to jail though because she’d kill me before that, even if it was an accident.

I waved both my hands frantically and Lucia flipped me upside down, back to normal.

Well, not normal, since I was still floating. Could you put me down?

Lucia sipped her tea.

“Anyhow, that witch has a lot of followers, so take care of them.”

“You think I can take care of all of them?”

“Do it. Or die.”

“Your options are too extreme!”

I thought she was reluctant to help me, but not only that, this witch didn’t even want to give me advice!

As I flapped about in the air, Lucia made something appear in her hand.

A sheathed dagger. She held out the handle towards me.

“What is this?”

“I’ll lend it to you. You can use it.”

No way, a magic weapon!?

That made me super happy. Magic weapons were hard to come by even in the underworld.

When she finally put me back on my chair, I took it with joy.

Lucia took one last sip from her tea and put the cup down.

“Be careful. You must only unsheath it when necessary. It’s dangerous.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Alright, do your best.”

Lucia waved and disappeared.

What a blessing it is to know a witch. I stared at the dagger’s scabbard.

I wanted to check inside, but she told me not to.

Tina woke up later and asked, “Are you sure that’s a weapon?”

So I pulled out the dagger.

Mm… a flower came out instead of a sword. Quite a pretty one, too.

Aargh, stop messing with me, Lucia! What if I actually pulled it out when I was in trouble!

I’ll give the flower to Miss Dyna tomorrow as a present! And I’m not gonna thank you for it! Curse you, Lucia!

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