Chapter 53

editor/TLC: serefina & Rin

Lu Chengye was outside, knocking on the door. Why had he come here? Although he was out of sorts, Zhang Hang was not a weak person. He remembered that he told Lu Chengye he would be home very late. Why did Lu Chengye know he would go back to his own home at this time?

He vigorously wiped his face and arranged his clothes, then went to the door and opened it. Zhang Hang had not yet figured out how to face Lu Chengye’s questioning. As soon as the door opened however, he was held firmly in Lu Chengye’s arms and kissed hard.

It wasn’t as if those past few days they hadn’t kissed, but the kisses were shallow and light. They were comfortable but ordinary, and unable to make a man’s desire rise in the slightest. Zhang Hang always thought that was where his relationship with Lu Chengye started and ended. Both of them had helped each other through hard times in their lives. As long as the other was around, their hearts would be at peace.

And now, this kiss let Zhang Hang break through his previous understanding of love. It wasn’t moist and sweet like the spring breeze and the rain, but a stormy plunder. Lu Chengye seemed like he wanted to devour him entirely. Each of his movements were part of a race to control Zhang Hang’s breathing space, until ultimately, he could only breathe in air from Lu Chengye. Lu Chengye seemed to be sucking out his soul. His mind was empty, and he was completely wrapped up in a feeling of insatiability.

Zhang Hang still remembered that he and Lu Chengye were both by the door neatly dressed when they kissed. When he felt coldness on his arm he found he was lying on the bed, and had no idea when his coat had dropped to the ground. The reason why his arm felt cold was because he accidentally touched the bedside table.

“Lu Chengye…” Zhang Hang struggled to call out the man’s name, but after that, didn’t know what to say.

Lu Chengye licked his lips with his head bowed. His originally deep and sensual voice had a little unknown hoarseness. “Hang Hang, there’s something I have to make clear to you. You are mine.”

That utterly overbearing voice put Zhang Hang in a bit of a trance. He subconsciously replied, “We are each other’s.”

“No, you don’t understand what it means to possess someone.” Lu Chengye could not tolerate the reason behind Zhang Hang’s refusal. “Possessing you means your entire person is mine, not just your body, but your whole life. Your past, present, and future. You will no longer have the right to freedom and your every move must be within my sight. The one who can guide you is me, the one who can dress you is me, and the one who can accompany you to sleep is me. In this world, the only one who can be your eyes is me. In the same way, even if you put on an act, you can only do so with me. Don’t hide it from me!”

“You… know? You… How do you know?” Zhang Hang was moved by Lu Chengye’s domineering but affectionate words at first, but when he heard the last sentence, he was shocked. He grabbed Lu Chengye’s arm.

“P uba rbwfbcf ab obiibk sbe,” Oe Jtfcusf rjlv yiecais, “yfmjerf P mjc’a rajcv sbe wlzlcu vglcxr obg qfbqif lc atf yjg jwbcu j ugbeq bo qfbqif ktb jvbgf sbe, klatbea wf xcbklcu atf rlaejalbc. Vb P jrxfv rbwfbcf ab kjamt sbe, yea P vlvc’a fzqfma sbe cba ab yf lc atf yjg. P obiibkfv sbe ab atf tbafi jcv kjlafv bearlvf obg sbe obg tjio atf cluta. P kjcafv ab kjla ecali sbe jcv Vtfc Zlcuofl mjwf bea ab rcjamt sbe vlgfmais, yea atfc P mtjcufv ws wlcv.”

“How could you stalk me? That’s…” Zhang Hang wanted to say that it was illegal, but abruptly thought of what Lu Chengye had just said. Suddenly, he felt that if someone liked Lu Chengye but Lu Chengye was just as kind and pleasant to them as before, he too might not be able to stand it.

“If you don’t want me to have someone follow you, don’t leave me.” Lu Chengye couldn’t help kissing the back of Zhang Hang’s hand. “Do you know what it’s like to wait? In the School for the Blind, they later prepared a lounge for guide dogs. Do you know why I didn’t go there and continued to wait for you at the school gate? Because leaving you and waiting for you was too hard to bear. I couldn’t see anything in the lounge, but at the school gate, I could see your class. When the bell rang after class ended, I could see people’s figures moving about in the class. I tried to identify which figure was yours, and imagined you were also looking at me through the window. When I was Big Black, I spent almost half my life waiting for you, just hoping to be able to wait for you to come back and then lie at your feet. There was nothing I could do, since a dog had no way to follow you everywhere. But now, things are different. I am human, and I can accompany you to the ends of the earth. I won’t wait for you again. I will follow you.”

This was undoubtedly an almost perverted desire for control, but after hearing it Zhang Hang felt extremely happy. Although he didn’t know what it was like to wait, he had been alone for too long and understood what it was like to be lonely. He felt so empty, it was as if he had lost his sense of identity. He was alone in the darkness. For more than a thousand days and nights, he wished that he could hear the familiar woof whenever he woke up, and that he could touch the furry body each time he raised a hand. His hand was empty for so long that, when it was held again, he wanted for there to never be a time when it would let go.

“I’m sorry.” Zhang Hang didn’t explain by saying “it was for you” and the like. Because he had decided to hide this matter from Lu Chengye, he had from the start had selfish motives. Whether it was for Lu Chengye or not, he had been wrong.

“I won’t say it’s okay, because I don’t forgive you.” Recalling his mood while waiting for Zhang Hang outside the hotel, Lu Chengye couldn’t help but gently bite Hang Hang’s face. “It is only if I do not forgive you that you will not dare to do it again.”

“Are you going to remember this for life?” Zhang Hang’s sense of touch was particularly keen. He was bitten by Lu Chengye, and although it didn’t hurt, he had no idea why the man had done it. His heart felt itchy and missed a beat.

“I will remember! Not only will I remember this matter, I’ll find a notebook to write down every good and bad thing you do in the future. When we are old, I will calculate the overall account. If you did more good things, I will forgive you. If you did more bad things, I will not forgive you. Instead, I will pursue this debt to our next lives and let you make it up to me then.”

Old age… Wouldn’t that mean he would spend a long long time with him? The corner of Zhang Hang’s mouth raised slightly, and he said softly, “It’s good you can promise to accompany me until we’re old.”

: LCY redeemed himself!! Yay. Also, this is why ZH is the best ML(?) in the history of MLs:

bish why can’t other MLs just say sorry??

bear: ʕ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°ʔ