V2C6

Translator: Anne Noh

Both of them silently hugged each other for the whole night, until Shu Nian's comforting hand that was gently stroking Ke Luo's hair slowly stopped, and before they fell asleep, he was still clutching on him tensely and his face was pressed against Shu Nian's chest.

Shu Nian finally believed that Ke Luo was serious about him. However, he needed to harden his heart once again because of that.

Whatever Ke Luo wanted, he could give him except for his love, except his love.

How could Shu Nian dared to waste Ke Luo's youth.

Ke Luo was still young and there would be more suitable person waiting for him in the future. He also has plenty of time and passion to find that person.

And Shu Nian wasn't like Ke Luo. He didn't have any youth and passion left. He had used eighteen years solely to gaze lovingly at Xie Yan, only loving him, just solely waiting for him, only for Xie Yan.

How could Shu Nian brew another eighteen years to have the same deep feelings to others?

The upcoming days, Ke Luo had been very quiet and well-behaved, didn't go anywhere and stayed next to Shu Nian for the whole day like a loyal dog guarding him. He would solemnly crossed off the date on the calendar with a red pen every night before going to bed, very reluctant, his expression was like he was mourning, and then dazedly counting the number of days left.

Shu Nian woke up several times in the middle of the night as he felt Ke Luo secretly kissed him. Cradling his head gently and kept on kissing him, but there was no further action.

He knew that Ke Luo was storing up memories and commemorated for the coming separation, and cherish the last chance he could have the warmth. Even Shu Nian felt empty in his heart when he thought he would send Ke Luo off soon. After busily helping Ke Luo packing a lot of luggage, he still felt that it wasn't enough, and felt something was still missing. He always worried about Ke Luo staying at the far T City alone, no one to look after him, would Ke Luo be able to live well, would he be able to stand the weather there, and if he wouldn't be able to eat the food there ...

Shu Nian couldn't help but to be worried even if he knew that it was unnecessary.

Even if he could only love Ke Luo as his son, it was also a form of love.

Shu Nian gave all his disgraceful love to Xie Yan, and gave Ke Luo everything except for love.

To sum everything up, that was all his feeling toward the two men.

He was like being cut into half when Ke Luo left.

Therefore Shu Nian didn't open his eyes, continued to pretend he was sleeping, let Ke Luo held him tenderly and pressed him against the warm chest as the heartbeat and body temperature penetrated slightly into him.

Anyone would become much weaker during separation.

"Xiao Nian."

"En?" Shu Nian organized the entire luggage he had organized countless of time before, the entire luggage must be check thoroughly, and everything must be placed orderly, all the boxes were labeled properly, and attentively wrote the label on the card about the things in the boxes. There were many luggages and instead of going out to university, it looked like they were moving into another house.

Most of the things are bought for Ke Luo by him. He couldn't give Ke Luo the love that he had wanted, but he could afford to give him another things and he would go all out to give it to him.

"I must leave the day after tomorrow."

Shu Nian's hand halted for a while, the word "the day after tomorrow" made him sad, his nose suddenly felt slightly stuffy, he just replied with an "en", turned toward Ke Luo, and wanted to touch his head.

Before this, he couldn't simply say the word "moving" in front of Ke Luo as his eyes would be red upon mentioning the word and it made him looked extremely pitiful. Shu Nian also felt he couldn't bear the separation as it looked like he wouldn't be able to see Ke Luo anymore after this.

Shu Nian raised his hand to touch the soft beautiful black hair and he realized that Ke Luo obviously got taller than a few months ago as he stood in front of Shu Nian.

Ke Luo's hair was cut slightly short and his sharp facial lines were gradually become brighter, and when he slightly scrunched his eyebrow, his eyes looked very depressed.

Ke Luo didn't go out for practice lately, and his skin quickly returned to slightly cream color, smooth and translucent, which made Shu Nian thought that Ke Luo was still a growing child.

But the simple short-sleeved polo shirt and LEVIS jeans wrapped around the slender figure, the obvious broad shoulders and his almost imposing height made Shu Nian didn't dare to regard him as a child.

Shu Nian really didn't know what to do with Ke Luo.

"I want to give you something." Ke Luo's hand was in his pocket, he slightly pursed his lip after he said that and continued slowly, "We have known each other for so long, and I never give anything to you..."

"Hrmm?" Shu Nian smiled; gently playing with Ke Luo's hair, watching Ke Lou looked down and saw his long eyelashes flickering as one of his hand fumbled around in his pocket. Shu Nian didn't say anything to decline Ke Luo at that time, since there was nothing to be worried about between them. Ke Luo also wanted to leave something to commemorate, and they didn't even have a photo together.

"This..." Ke Luo took out a stack of folded paper and handed it to Shu Nian as he slightly bowed his head, "I only have this..."

"Eh?" Shu Nian took and opened the paper. He was slightly surprised and became confused for a moment before he asked hesitantly, "What is this?"

"I want to allocate my share to you..."

Shu Nian was scared, and hurriedly shoved the official documents and authorization papers back into Ke Luo's hand: "What kind of joke is this? It is becoming more and more outrageous. Put it away quickly!"

Ke Luo refused to take it back and his face couldn't conceal his disappointment: "...You don't want it?"

"Of course I don't want it!" Shu Nian simply tugged open Ke Luo's pocket and shoved all the papers into it. What did he think the twenty percent share for? It could be used conveniently as a parting gift? Who is Shu Nian to Ke Luo? Why should he take such a large sum of Ke family's property?

"Why?" Ke Luo immediately held Shu Nian's hand, "You don't like it?"

"Ke Luo, twenty percent of the shares..." Shu Nian drawn his hand back and his head was slightly aching, "do you understand what it's about? How could you so casually give it to others? Well, let's stop this..."

"I'm serious. Please accept it, okay?"

"No, no, no...I can't take it," Shu Nian smiled wryly. "Don't be nonsense. I have nothing to do with Ke family and I have no reason to accept this. This is so ridiculous. [1] Xiao Luo, don't make fun of me."

[T/N: [1] xiao is used for nicknames and usually used to call your childhood friend. It can also be used for family. In this line, it is used just like parents would call their children.]

Ke Luo looked as if he was at lost and his hand also maintained at the slightly stretched out posture. He stood silently as he looked down. He didn't say anything for a while and just stood still.

"Xiao Luo?"

"You really don't want it?" Ke Luo's voice was weak as if he was being abandoned.

"Xiao Luo, this isn't a joke. I can't accept it ..."

"I just want to give you something. Just return it back if you don't want it. You don't have to worry...and don't feel pressure. I don't mean anything else...I just want to give it to you..."

Ke Luo shoved his hands in the pockets. He looked down slightly and he unconsciously moved his legs back and forth, "...You are afraid to accept it in case you have to give something in return to me? You don't have to. I will be extremely happy if you accept it..."

"It wasn't like that Xiao Luo," Shu Nian's heart began to ache once again. He hurriedly held Ke Luo's arm and tried to appease him, "I don't accept it simply because I couldn't accept it. It's inappropriate..."

Shu Nian wanted to say he didn't deserve to be treated such way by Ke Luo, but he didn't say it.

Ke Luo's eyes were already red and he slightly pursed his lip: "But I...only have this..."

"Then, what do you want? I have nothing else to give to you..."

"I want to give you something that I have...Do you understand?"

Shu Nian only said "en". Of course he understood.

"I only have this. You already refused to accept my feeling. You also don't want to accept this? Then... what can I give you? What do I have that you are willing to accept? ..."

Shu Nian almost blurted out: "I don't need anything."

Ke Luo froze and there was something glistering around his long eyelashes. Shu Nian didn't have time to have a clearer look as Ke Luo turned around, he kept on maintaining the stubborn stance as his hand was still in his pocket and he whispered lowly: "I understood. Let's forget about it...Good night."

"Xiao Luo..."

"I'm going to sleep. You don't have to pack the luggage, I won't bring it with me...I don't want you to pity me."

Shu Nian sighed. He firmly grabbed Ke Luo's shoulders to turn him around. The young man's red eyes as he was fighting back the tears made Shu Nian felt pain as if he was being cut. He hid his emotion and used the gentlest movement to hold the crying boy in his arms. He stroked the evidently strong back that was still inexplicably frail in front of him: "Idiot, it's not like what you are thinking of...I..."

The tears that Ke Luo suppressed for a very long time erupted and he tightly clutched Shu Nian's jacket as he wept. They embraced each other and Shu Nian felt he was becoming even more softhearted until he couldn't even say "no".

Shu Nian wasn't ready to accept the separation, and he knew he couldn't accept to be separated with Ke Luo for a very long time as Ke Luo would be lonely and he may slightly miss him when they were apart.

"[2] Don't cry..." Shu Nian repeatedly stroked Ke Luo's back gently as if he was appeasing a small animal, "Okay then, I'll help you to keep it...Just remember to take it back when you need it, okay?"

[T/N: [2] 乖 (guāi) is usually used to pacify a child or your best friend. There's no specific translation in English as it can mean anything depending on the context.]

Shu Nian was also worried that Ke Luo was too young and couldn't endure the burden of owning the share and it would be bad. Shu Nian could shoulder the burden on behalf of Ke Luo for a couple of years and it wasn't a bad idea.

No matter what, Shu Nian was like a doted father toward Ke Luo in his heart.

Xie Yan watched from distant at the thin figure as it disappeared into the building's entrance. He began to reverse without saying anything and made a u-turn.

He also felt that his action was almost like a stalker, but he couldn't control the urge and unconsciously followed Shu Nian.

He bumped into that person at the hypermarket just now — a hypermarket that has a high probability of Shu Nian appearing as he regularly went there for almost once every two days, and even the time was basically the same, except for the last time where Shu Nain unknowingly didn't appear and Xie Yan ended up waiting in vain for two hours.

He stood just a step away from Shu Nian behind the shelves and looked at him without batting an eyelid. Shu Nian was always gentle and kind whether in private or in public places. He placed the products that he felt he didn't need back at the shelf unlike other customers that would conveniently toss away the products at shelf that was closed to them, and he would always pushed around the cart patiently back to its original place.

Xie Yan loved when Shu Nian was so deep in his thought and did something seriously, loved when he glanced around as he walked randomly from shelf to shelf, loved how innocent he looked when he grabbed an orange and placed it under his nose to take a whiff to check the freshness, loved how flustered he looked like when he wanted to help picked up a mackerel that was flapping around on the ground when he was at the fish section, and he even loved when he fisted his hand and brought it toward his mouth as he cough lightly when he was selecting groceries. Xie Yan liked all the little things about Shu Nian.

He liked it until he was unable to control himself, and sometimes Xie Yan felt like he was unable to breathe as he looked at Shu Nian.

Xie Yan also knew that Shu Nian had been living at that Ke young master's house from that fateful day, and he still continued to live there even after Ke Luo left for a few days ago.

Xie Yan couldn't resist the urge to curse every time he saw Shu Nian entered that familiar car to drive "back" to that house. If it was in the past, he would have dashed toward Shu Nian before his brain could comprehend the situation, but now he could only stay in his car and fiercely [3] curse at the innocent windshield. He wasn't afraid, it was just that he was still unclear about everything.

[T/N: [3] 三字经 literally "three classic characters" which is a popular and classis curse in Chinese, 他妈的 (tāmāde; sometime TMD) which often translated to "Fuck" whereas it's literally means "his mom's" and it's extremely offensive. That's why if we wanna say 'fuck' we will use another word that literally means fuck.]

What would he do after he rushed to him? Snatch Shu Nian back? What would he do after he snatched him back? And what would he said to Shu Nian?

If Shu Nian came back this time, it would be for a lifetime.

He couldn't let Shu Nian came back if he wasn't ready for a lifetime.

The kind of ambiguous relationship that they used to have previously couldn't be used anymore.

Xie Yan was taught to be responsible for his own actions ever since he was young, but he forgot to implement it around Shu Nian. Therefore, he could only act stubbornly, unscrupulously, and doing thing according to his instinct.

In fact, Shu Nian was precisely the one to be blamed for.

Xie Yan firmly pursed his lips and stepped on the accelerator. He liked Shu Nian, but he wasn't a homosexual. He didn't have the slightest attraction toward another guy apart from that person.

That was why...He acknowledged the intense love he had toward that man at that time. Xie Yan kept on steeping on the accelerator and since that day, they had became a complete stranger and it showed how many courage Xie Yan needed.

There was nothing Xie Yan could do, he couldn't even struggle or looking at Shu Nian secretly. The pain was sweet, or maybe it could be said the sweetness was painful, until he almost sank in the sorrow rapidly.

But once a decision was made, you couldn't turn back. A person didn't have any choice to go back on his word once they made a decision and there was nothing he could do about than just ignored everything.

A party was held in a villa. Xie Yan stood coldly and two to three people stood in front of him just to have some awkward and irrelevant chat and there were pretty women carrying a various colors of wine and juices moving around the villa.

Previously, Xie Yan would still took a few fancy glances, and the people around him wouldn't lose their poise as he assess their appearances, but now, he didn't even need to lift his eyes to see that they lack of something. The mixtures of various types of fragrances wafting in the air also didn't faze him. All those expensive and wonderful fragrances only reminded him of the faint earthy smell on Shu Nian's body as it has a completely fresh and warm fragrance. It was the smell of the shower gel that Shu Nian used for many years.

Every time Xie Yan was in the bathroom, he couldn't help from pouring a large heap of that shower gel to relieve himself by using that smell and it made him extremely miserable.

"Young master of Ke family's share fell completely in Shu Nian's hand."

Xie Yan's hand trembled, the liquid in his glass shook, the expression on his face wavered only for a short while and then it changed as if nothing had happened: "Really?"

"Therefore they tried their best to 'invite' Shu Nian to this party," the person who was talking smiled ambiguously, "I'm afraid it's going to be spectacular."

It was well known that Shu Nian was kicked out from Xie family and Xie Yan wasn't his "master" anymore. Everyone would lightly make fun about that issue in front of his face and it would also lade with a different meaning. Although no one could say that Shu Nian did something wrong — he always looked like someone who was very good at obeying order — but precisely because of that, they had even more chance to make all sorts of vicious and despicable speculation.

Xie family had raised Shu Nian for more than a decade and he was closely attached to Xie Yan, but they suddenly became hostile and kicked him out. It looked like there wasn't a mistake on the surface, but there must be a certain vile mistake that shouldn't be known to others.

The upper class's life was always full with spice and a day couldn't pass without any rumors. The party involved in the rumors certainly wouldn't be able to take it anymore but jumping out to clarify the rumors was the stupidest solution as it would only made them excited with another rumor.

Hence, Xie Yan didn't refute and just wait for it to die down. However, no matter how much he restrained himself, he still couldn't stop his facial expression from becoming stiff whenever he heard the people in front of him brazenly made fun of Shu Nian.

"How?"

"Regarding on how he did it, Ke family's answer was very unpleasant. They invite him tonight simply to humiliate him. It's no wonder because those shares fell into the hands of an outsider, they won't just sit and watch."

Xie Yan quietly looked around: "He already comes?"

"He already came. He is near the swimming pool. I just come from there and it looks like the drama is about to begin."

Xie Yan quickly thought an excuse to walk away, or he might not be able to control the impulse to punch them ruthlessly in order to wipe out the smirk on their faces.

Xie Yan saw a glimpse of Shu Nian, and he was very pale and thin, with a plain and simple appearance. He stood in front some of Ke Luo's vicious auntie and cousin. He frowned slightly, he looked unperturbed and showed his unusual cold expression.

"Unless it is Ke Luo's wish, otherwise I won't attend the shareholders meeting and abstain from voting. This is possible, right?" The voice was still calm and courteous, but it still stood up from the uproar coming from the other people.

Xie Yan didn't listen to their shout of provocation, he instinctively only listened to Shu Nian's voice.

"I already told you, I just keep it temporarily on behalf of Ke Luo, and will return it back to him in the future. You don't have to worry about it..."

.......

"Ke Luo has the freedom to choose who will take full control over the shares. He has grown up and has the right not to report anything to all of you."

......

"Mrs. Ke, please mind your language." Shu Nian's voice gradually increased and his face was extremely pale after he was humiliated. He straightened his back and ready to fight back, the corner of his mouth tighten, "He chose me instead of all of you, simply because I am more like his elder than any of you, and I took care of him more. All of you have no reason to speculate and insult Ke Luo and me."

......

"These shares are between Ke Luo and me. All of you don't have the slightest connection on how I will deal with it and when I will return it," Shu Nian said out of enraged, "No need to spend your time and effort to worry. We don't engage in what you called 'that kind of filthy deal'. The relationship between us is pure. Please don't slander maliciously, otherwise all of you should get ready to take responsibility for your own words..."

Xie Yan heaved a breath, regardless Shu Nian was being honest or not, he was willing to believe him, even if he was fooling himself, since at any rate, Shu Nian was his. While reprimanding himself not to beat the host out of impulse, he took a few steps forward, restrained himself and shouted: "Excuse me."

Shu Nian was momentarily shocked. He turned around and coincidently made eye contact with Xie Yan. He was taken aback and froze for a long time, and he suddenly became flabbergasted.

"Ah......"

Shu Nian was extremely embarrassed as he didn't expect Xie Yan to be there. His skin was extremely pale and his temple was red due to embarrassment. It was as if his previous calmness was instantly crushed down by Xie Yan's appearance. His whole being felt numbed, he was stupefied and didn't know what to do.

Shu Nian knew Xie Yan heard the vicious ridicules that was thrown by Ke family, Xie Yan heard them saying he was shameless, he lured Ke Luo to bed in order to obtain those shares, live together with Ke Luo and sold his body for a few months by doing filthy things before he finally succeeded...

Of course, Xie Yan had heard enough to disdain him.

Shu Nian straightened his neck, averted his eyes, and his expression was serene and almost painful as if he was accepting his fate.

Those people saw Xie Yan's cold face, and determined to see Shu Nian being humiliated. Shu Nian's expression obviously showed that he admitted defeat, and it made their arrogance surged up, doubling their arrogant clamor: "We had wronged you? The way that bastard looks at you are abnormal, it was like an illness. You think we are blind? You dare to say that there's nothing going on?"

Xie Yan's face suddenly turned grimed, froze and couldn't move.

Shu Nian didn't dare to look at Xie Yan, straightened his neck even more and looked like he was beaten. He pursed his lip for a long time before he said harshly: "I have something to do, so let's end it here today. Please excuse me."

He was obviously trying to evade them as if they were trying to hit him with a syringe containing stimulant. Suddenly a "splashing" sound could be heard. They went toward him as if they had finally found an opening and didn't let him go.

"Ptooey, really shameless!"

"Don't even check how he looks like in the mirror, and still very shameless!"

Finally they could execute the plan to humiliate Shu Nian after ages of scheming. They excitedly and blatantly tried to outdo one another when hurling insults at him. It was as if the one who insult Shu Nian the least would suffer a loss.

Shu Nian's face and lip tensed, and he avoided looking at the man that was standing next to the swimming pool. It wasn't because of humiliation and pain, but because he was humiliated in front of Xie Yan. He was embarrassed until even the veins on his forehead that were covered under the thin and pale skin began to bulge out.

Xie Yan was about to flare up when something flashed in front of his eyes. He didn't see clearly who and what that person did to Shu Nian, and he also didn't clearly hear the splashing sound. His eyes only saw the blood that suddenly trickled down heavily from Shu Nian's forehead.

No one expect the situation and everyone was stupefied. Even Shu Nian was also caught off guard. He swayed because of the sudden impact and the sharp pain, his foot slipped, he was unable to control his body and fall back into the water.

It seemed like everything happened in just a split seconds, and everyone quiet down to stare at the swimming pool once the loud noise of splashing water was heard.

Xie Yan only felt his anger exploded. He didn't even have time to think, and he suddenly realized that he was holding Shu Nian tightly and he covered his hand over Shu Nian's bleeding forehead. He couldn't remember how he jumped into the water or how did he used his sleeve to pressed down on the wound on Shu Nian's head.

"What are you guys doing?!" Xie Yan glared at the people who stood near the swimming pool, and even he was startled by his vicious tone.

Shu Nian stood without any expression and red liquid that was diluted with water trickled down, he was stupefied and closed his eyes immediately by the time the water droplets trickled down around his eyes.

"Apologize! Immediately apologize to him!" Xie Yan knew his face must distort beyond terror at that time, it was completely distorted. Everyone quietly cowering and didn't even dare look at him.

Once they went out from the swimming pool, a servant hurriedly brought cottons, medicine and bandage, and asked fearfully: "Should I call a doctor?" Xie Yan carefully wiped the blood and ruthlessly glared at him: "get lost."

At that time, his eyes and movements totally didn't match with his aggressiveness and it made the people around them curious, and Shu Nian became even more embarrassed as everyone were looking at them.

During the time to stop the bleeding, Shu Nian slightly rested his head against Xie Yan's arms, closed his eyes and didn't dare to move. It was a good medicine hence the bleeding around his head already stopped and he was becoming uneasy. Xie Yan whispered in his ear as if he was pacifying him: "Don't move...stay for a while. It will be okay..."

Shu Nian obediently listened to Xie Yan's word and didn't move, leaving only his eyes that were moving hesitatingly under his eyelids. Xie Yan held him, and the blood seeping through the bandage around his head had stopped. Xie Yan felt the bony body in his arms shivered slightly.

"Are you cold?"

Shu Nian had been closing his eyes rather firmly and he didn't answer. Xie Yan saw that Shu Nian was feeling inferior and embarrassed, hence he held him tighter: "You can get cold easily if you lost too much blood. Do you feel slightly better like this? Very cold? Your lip is pale...This won't do. You must change your clothes..."

Xie Yan felt very distressed. That was his Shu Nian and others actually have the cheek to hurt him. He felt pain as if it was his wound that was ripped open hence he could only embraced Shu Nian in his arms tightly.

"Xiao Nian, Xiao Nian..."

His tone and his eyes when he was looking at others were completely different from being gentle. He was really gentle with Shu Nian unlike when he was with others. It was simply by instinct.

The person Xie Yan most concerned about in the whole world was that thin and naive man. It was as if Shu Nian was a part of him, and he would be in a massive pain once they were separated. He never long for anyone, but he was always having the grief and anguish of longing for Shu Nian, it was as if the existence of Shu Nian was inevitable and right.

He couldn't back out now, it was as if he would be in pain if he let go of Shu Nain, as if only by holding that person would make him felt complete.

Xie Yan embraced Shu Nian and let the driver drove them back to Xie's mansion. Shu Nian was still closing his eyes, half of the reason was he was dizzy because he had loss many blood and his whole body was cold, the other half might because he was slightly scared.

Shu Nian didn't dare to open his eyes. He felt doubtful, starting from the time he stood up after being humiliated in the water until the time Xie Yan began to embrace him, it was as if everything were imaginary. Shu Nian didn't dare to think that Xie Yan was holding him now, and the person who was whispering softly into his ear was Xie Yan, and he was afraid to open his eyes to verify everything.

Perhaps it was because he slipped and fall. They went into a room and he changed into a dry and clean clothes. It felt like he was dreaming.

The wound around his head had been bandaged once again and a cool hand was placed on his forehead: "Still painful? Did it get slightly better?"

Shu Nian hesitantly replied with an "en". He opened his eyes, trying to detect his whereabouts and either he was still dreaming or he already woken up.

"Dizzy? Then you should sleep for a while."

Shu Nian's mind went blank for a while. He didn't have time to speak as he was covered with a blanket: "Go to sleep..."

Shu Nian felt that the situation was beyond his comprehension and he was bewildered for quite a while before stuttering: "Thank you..."

Shu Nian closed his eyes. Xie Yan still didn't leave the bed even after a long time. He could only lie stiffly on the bed as he didn't feel sleepy at all.

Anne's Rant:

17 pages of English translation! 累死了(⌣_⌣")

Some of you asked why I changed the title, it was because I want to avoid any mishap (being remove) hence I will rename the story from time to time.

Judging by the pages, which most chapters contain at least 12 pages, the update "might" be twice a month or maybe once. If I am feeling generous then I might update more but judging by the amount of ignorant people out there, my generosity will be closed to none.

In need for fast update? www.google.com/translate

Willing to wait? Congratulations you are one of the precious readers that know how to appreciate translators.

Till then. Have a day that you deserve.

Please note that some part might be incorrect as I don't know how to translate it to English. Mistakes are bound to happen and corrections are very welcome.