Chapter 4 of 10
Chapter 4
16 min read3,965 words
"Shin, what are you going to do about university? You could have entered a prestigious school, but you deliberately chose a low-level high school... You don't have to worry about money."
My step-sister and step-mother were eating breakfast at the table.
My step-sister was munching on bread with a sleepy face.
I had already changed into my uniform and was about to go to school.
I never eat breakfast with the family.
It's just a silent and oppressive atmosphere.
"…No, as you said before, I'll leave home after graduation. I can't be a burden any longer."
My step-mother made a bitter face again.
I still remember.
'With two children, tuition is a big burden... One of them is always causing trouble.'
'A child who hits girls is not my child!'
'You, this time it's groping... Oh, why... I wish you would leave sooner...'
Words I heard as a child.
They pierce the heart. They become thorns that never come out, rotting from the core.
My step-mother made a bitter face.
"Oh, that was just a figure of speech when I was scolding you. …You are my child, so you should be a good example for Haruka. As an older brother—"
—As an older brother.
How many times have these words shattered my heart?
...It's okay. I don't feel anything now.
"…Yes, I understand."
My sleepy step-sister mumbled, spilling bread crumbs.
"Ugh, something about yesterday... I forgot after I slept... Ugh, I'm so sleepy. ...Big brother, are you leaving home... Are you going on a trip?"
My step-mother, with a slightly nervous look, wiped my step-sister's mouth.
It was a gesture like taking care of a child. As if she wasn't treating her like a high school student.
"You don't have to worry about it. Look, you'll be late, so get ready."
"Fai... Ah, big brother, don't go yet..."
I left the living room with my bag.
---
I didn't particularly dislike the time when I went to school.
With so many students around, the chances of running into acquaintances decreased. No one talked to me either.
No one was around me.
Even though many students were walking to the same school.
Sometimes I felt a strange sensation.
If I could go to another world from here—what would happen?
That's why I started writing novels.
This morning, I felt a little different than usual.
I usually don't look at my phone, but I suddenly felt like checking my novel site's personal page.
I wasn't expecting anything. I write novels because I like them.
Before I knew it, I was checking my personal page.
—No notifications, huh.
Messages don't come often. But Pomeko's message last night calmed me down.
---
When I reached the school gate, my childhood friend, Miyazaki Shizuka, and an unknown female student were waiting for someone.
I almost stopped in my tracks. I told myself.
It's okay, no matter what happens, there are a lot of people watching here.
I felt their gazes. I pretended not to notice.
That's how the world works. I could just pass by—
"Wait, Shin! I, I want to talk! Face my feelings properly!!"
"Right, um, are you Shin? I'm Kurozawa Momo, a friend of Shizuka. ...Actually, why are you smiling? Shizuka is trying to face you seriously, you know."
It seemed I couldn't get away with just a fake smile.
...I was attracting curious gazes from the students on their way to school.
Miyazaki is objectively a popular girl. She's just cute.
Miyazaki looked at me with a sad face. I'm sure any guy would melt if he saw that face.
"I, I don't do fake confessions... You know, I know a lot has happened, but... It's all in the past, so let's look forward. H, how about we go to the movies together next time? It'll cheer you up, I'm sure."
"Totally, Shizuka is such a good girl, super cute!"
Kurozawa, who was teasing Miyazaki, suddenly lowered her voice.
"Actually, who do you think you are? I don't get it at all. What happened in the past doesn't matter! Even if you were violent or had groping allegations, Shizuka still likes you? Fake confession... Ha, you must be crazy."
"B, Momo, I, I'm fine..."
Her words didn't reach me.
Why do I have to be told this by an unknown girl?
I felt nothing in my heart.
Moreover, Miyazaki didn't even try to deny the allegations against me.
—What is affection?
The pain of a fake confession is something only the person involved can understand.
---
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