Chapter 14

### Debut Evaluation Performance (1)

The male trainees all moved to the waiting room. It was said that they would perform in teams first, according to a randomly assigned order, and then proceed with individual performances.

The small theater that Hanul Entertainment had rented for the entire day bore the touch of professionals. Though not perfect, it resembled a smaller version of a broadcasting station's public hall.

The background and lighting were a bit amateurish, but they managed to create a similar atmosphere.

Well, even this much was a blessing. To hold a grand debut evaluation and invite family members was quite something.

While some agencies broadcast their own debut reality shows, it was rare for a company to prepare such a stage.

The start had not been announced yet, so the murmurs from outside were still audible.

I hadn't seen it, but according to Park Ha, the audience seats were almost full. He thought more than 150 people had come.

During the wait, the trainees chatted to ease their tension. We occasionally joined in the conversation.

"Isn't the CEO a devil? Inviting family members and all. Don't you think so, Park Haju?"

Was he more nervous because his family was there? I thought Ohan would be more composed and cynical.

"Ohan hyung, you always fly on stage anyway, right? My mom and younger sister are both here!"

Ah, Ohan was just teasing Haju, who was whining. Ohan, who was annoyed by Haju's whining, sighed and said:

"It's okay to be nervous. It's good that someone is here to see you."

"Hyung, your family can't come?"

"On a business trip abroad. They picked a terrible date for the evaluation."

Hmm, I inadvertently learned about his personal life. Ohan didn't seem to mind.

Green hyung, who was sitting next to me and checking his makeup in a mirror, said:

"I don't have anyone coming either, so we're comrades."

"I can tell just by looking. You didn't tell your parents, did you, Green hyung!"

"Caught. They would just make noise if they came. Besides, I won't fail, so they can watch me on TV later."

"Wow, hyung, you're heartless!"

Does Green hyung's family have a celebrity? That was a possibility.

They all seemed to know each other's family situations well, having been together for a long time.

I would probably learn about them naturally over time.

"Comrades? That's right. My parents are still in Brighton."

"Yeah, Ji-on. It's hard for them to come from the UK. They're busy, and I didn't invite them either. It's too far, and it's hard to bring my younger siblings."

Seohun hyung said this calmly, without any disappointment. Come to think of it, coincidentally, everyone except me and Park Ha had family who couldn't come.

"What about Yi-won? Is your family coming today?"

Ji-on asked the question.

"Yeah, both of them are coming."

"I should introduce my mom to your mom! It would be great if they got along."

According to what he added, Park Ha hadn't even finished high school and only had a middle school diploma. His mom had struggled to get along with other parents who had children his age.

He had always hoped for someone who could form a bond by talking about their children.

What a filial son. Park Ha had a deep and affectionate love for his family. You could tell how much he loved them just by watching him for a bit.

"It would be great if we both make it to the debut group and our parents can meet."

I wanted to offer to introduce them, but given my condition, I needed to get home and rest quickly. It would be fortunate if my health didn't get exposed before then...

I closed my eyes, pretending to be tired, and tried to boost my energy as much as possible.

The noise from outside gradually decreased, and the CEO announced the start of the debut evaluation.

Names were called one by one, and the trainees who had prepared team performances went on stage.

The loud volume from the speakers caused a slight vibration, and I could faintly hear the song being performed. I could have glanced at the stage, but it didn't seem like it would help me much.

Ohan was called first, followed by Ji-on and Park Ha.

Next was my turn.

Hearing the call to prepare, I opened my eyes.

My body was still heavy, but I couldn't afford to make any mistakes. This stage was important to me, but it was even more crucial not to let my teammates down.

Though we weren't close, I genuinely supported their dreams. They were all working hard to achieve their idol aspirations.

I slowly walked onto the stage and took my position. The stage gradually brightened as the lights shone on us.

The intense lighting made it hard to see the audience, but I managed to find the red light of the camera.

It was time to start.

Please let me finish this stage safely.

* * *

Wearing a white T-shirt with colorful graffiti, navy shorts, and white knee-high socks, I sang with a yellow cap tilted backward, fitting the mischievous concept.

The stage costume, makeup, and in-ear monitors made me feel like a real idol.

Perhaps because of that, my concentration was higher than usual.

A state of flow.

This is when you use that term. I forgot about the pain and was completely immersed in the stage. I didn't forget the bright smile I had learned from Ohan.

I moved across the stage, letting my body follow the music. My team members and I were in sync, and we finished the performance without any mistakes. The heavy breathing from my body was surprisingly sweet.

A mere 4 minutes. Were the audience satisfied?

When the stage ended and I returned to the waiting room, my head felt numb.

Fortunately, I seemed to have shown what I had prepared. That was enough. I was satisfied, so I had no regrets.

Even if I hadn't caught a cold, I couldn't have done a more satisfying performance.

"OMG! Hyung, you stole the show! I could only see you!"

"Wow! You're definitely in the debut group."

"Thanks... I didn't do too badly."

Park Ha and Ji-on, who had finished their performances, were making a fuss. When my reaction was lukewarm, they started talking to other trainees.

Ohan, who hadn't seen my group performance and was trying to control his mind away from the commotion, sat with his arms crossed and looked me up and down.

"You seem a bit off."

The mischievous tone from his cute face felt threatening today. He wasn't sure if something was wrong, but he was suspicious.

"...What's off?"

"Hmm. Do you want to deny it?"

My heart skipped a beat. Ah, he was testing me.

I knew Ohan was quick to notice things, but experiencing it firsthand was scary.

"..."

"If you don't want to say, that's fine. It's not my business anyway."

He didn't seem to have any intention of telling others. Ohan's individualistic attitude was particularly appealing today.

Maybe because I had exerted myself, my temples throbbed, and it was hard to support my body.

Was there a place where I could rest alone? If I kept mingling with people, I might struggle with my individual performance.

"Mr. Ha. You look tired. I'll connect a few chairs for you to lie down."

"...Thanks."

I quickly lay down on the chair bed Ohan had made and covered my face with the cap I had been wearing.

Was it because I thought I had overcome a difficult moment, or because I had exhausted my energy? My body started to shiver.

My clothes were damp. Had I been sweating without realizing it?

There was less than 2 hours left. If I could just endure that, I could go home and collapse.

Thinking I was sleeping, people around me whispered.

"Why is Yi-won lying down?"

"Recovering energy."

Green hyung, who was sitting nearby, made an excuse for me. He was a tsundere, pretending to be harsh but full of consideration.

"Stress can really drain your energy. Hyung, why does Seohun hyung look like that won't happen to him? Not everyone is as strong as you."

"Green, I'm weak too."

"Your mentality?"

"Very. I need to go bench press later. Definitely with you."

"...Can't we go tomorrow?"

"No. We can't."

I relaxed my body while listening to their conversation. It felt like my consciousness was gradually fading as if my body was sinking into a deep sea.

"...Yi-won! Yi-won, your turn is almost up. You need to prepare."

Seohun hyung's voice and the hand shaking my shoulder woke me up.

When did I fall asleep? Or did I lose consciousness? At least I had managed to rest a little.

My individual performance was second to last, and the trainees who had finished their individual performances had gone to the audience area to meet their families.

In the waiting room, only Seohun hyung, me, and three other trainees who weren't close to me were left.

Thinking I needed to prepare quickly, I got up from my seat. Then, my vision blurred. I closed my eyes and stumbled, trying to regain my balance, and Seohun hyung quickly grabbed my arm.

"Yi-won, you have a fever..."

Seohun hyung, who had touched my bare skin to support me, easily noticed my high temperature.

I had tried to avoid contact because Seohun hyung was so attentive, but I couldn't avoid it right after waking up.

Fortunately, Seohun hyung didn't say anything loudly, so it didn't seem to be noticed by others.

"I'm fine. I just need to last 4 minutes."

Trainees who specialized in vocals were sometimes evaluated on both vocal and dance performances. But I chose to be evaluated on one stage to leave a more favorable and strong impression.

Pouring all my efforts into 4 minutes.

I didn't expect something like this to happen today, but it was a perfect choice.

"Alright. Be careful."

Seohun hyung couldn't stop me. If anyone else were in this situation, they would make the same choice.

I quickly changed into my costume and went to the bathroom.

For a mature concept, I had to wear an all-black suit and style my hair. Before adjusting my styling, I wet my hair and face to hide the dampness from cold sweat.

I prepared an excuse that I had washed my face.

However, the makeup artist and hair stylist's reactions were peculiar.

"Wow... You're serious. You have a fierce aura. Just a touch-up with wax will do."

"Come here to adjust your lip color."

I didn't understand, but it was good that they didn't need to do much, so I could finish preparing quickly.

After slightly adjusting my hair and straightening my clothes, I was ready. My number was called immediately.

The stage was dark again.

The song I chose expressed the boundary between a boy and a man. I had originally planned to choose a different song, but Green hyung strongly recommended this one.

It had a slightly embarrassing sexual nuance to show to my parents, but I was convinced by the argument that it highlighted my strengths.

Outstanding singing ability and a deep, resonant voice. The choreography required high-level techniques to depict conflict and change through the body.

These were the things I needed to show on this stage today.

My body still felt heavy, as if being sucked into a swamp. Cold sweat made my body cold, and my head wasn't functioning properly.

But I could do it. I had practiced so much that my body would remember even if my mind forgot.

A slow, blues-like intro began. I slowly covered my face with my palms, revealing only my lips.

As I moved my lips, a voice mixed with breathing echoed across the stage.

In the dark night, the moon faintly illuminates us

In an empty house, only our breathing can be heard

Our fingertips brush, our gazes meet, and we don't avoid

We haven't decided whether to cross the line

I stand on a precarious boundary

Between a boy and a man, that's me

If I cross this line, there's no turning back

The borderline between a boy and a man, the borderline between you and me

The lighting wasn't bright, fitting the mood of the song. It created a clear contrast on my face.

It felt strange. It was as if I had left my body, and my body didn't belong to me.

My lips were dry, my heart was racing, and my blood was pumping fast

I'm excited, my heart is pounding, but I can't take a step

I hesitate, afraid of becoming a completely different person

You're lying when you say you're not scared

Even if you get close enough to feel my breath, can you

Really ignore that sign with such boldness

I leaned back and swept my body, then turned my head toward the camera in the audience, following the beat.

I narrowed one eye and tilted my head with a mocking expression.

I could hear the audience's intake of breath.