Chapter 2

### Chapter 2: Farewell, Memories (1)

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#1

People don't change easily.

That's true. I learned that people can't be rewritten. I feel it deeply, more than anyone else.

No one taught me this; I learned it through my own experiences. Therefore, this maxim has always held a very precious meaning for me.

So.

People don't change easily, but in other words, if you keep cooking, frying, and boiling them, they will change eventually.

That's what my experience has shown.

Somehow, I changed.

I became so different that my old self was nowhere to be found, and I had become a completely different person.

Let me tell a little story from the past.

When I was in the first year of the middle school at the academy, I was significantly shorter and smaller than the other boys my age.

I mustered the courage to confess my feelings to my childhood friend, who was also my only friend and my first love.

Actually, that courage came from a sense of urgency.

When I moved to the middle school, I found myself in a much larger pond, where students with incomparable credentials were everywhere.

Their innate magical power, talents, physical attributes, and even their faces—all of these things overwhelmed me.

In front of such outstanding classmates, I could only hunch my shoulders and walk around.

It was then that I realized how objectively beautiful my childhood friend was, and how many upperclassmen had come to see her since the start of the school year.

Perhaps that's why.

When I saw my small and insignificant self compared to her, who shone so brilliantly, I felt a sense of urgency, fearing that she might be taken by another boy.

Indeed, at the time, the number of male students who showed direct interest in her could be said to be about a third of the entire male student body.

They would often drag their chairs over and start conversations next to her seat.

They would ask about her personal preferences, and compliments about her hair and face were always included in their words.

The male upperclassmen also introduced her to various parts of the academy to help her adapt to the new environment, which was a significant change from the somewhat remote area she came from.

Every time I saw this, my heart ached, but what right did I have to stop them? There was nothing I could do for my childhood friend, who would look at me with a troubled smile.

My childhood friend was an excellent student, highly regarded not only by her classmates and upperclassmen but also by the professors.

She was always humble, and her gentle nature made people smile. Despite coming from a place far from the norms of etiquette, she knew how to behave properly and had a genius-level talent in magic.

I would say that at least six or seven professors had taken a particular interest in her.

In other words, all the professors in the magic department.

They didn't want to lose such a diligent and outstanding student. I understand their feelings completely.

If I were a professor, I would have written a personal recommendation letter to encourage her to apply to the Royal Academy's Magic Department.

By doing so, I would have been recognized for my keen eye in discovering such a remarkable talent. If she became the youngest grand mage in the future, my reputation would have been greatly enhanced.

But that's not important.

The conclusion is that my childhood friend was in a position far beyond mine from the moment she entered the middle school.

Six years.

The time we spent building our relationship.

We knew each other before elementary school, so by the time we entered middle school, it had been about that long.

At the time, my childhood friend, who was in the same class as me, didn't hide the fact that we knew each other. She would often approach me, who sat quietly by the window reading books, and start a conversation as usual.

We would sometimes have lunch together at her invitation, just the two of us, because she knew I felt uncomfortable when others joined us.

As time went on, people started gathering around my childhood friend, and I naturally ended up eating alone. Still.

It seemed that my childhood friend was always concerned about my isolated appearance in the class. She introduced me to her friends several times, telling me that I didn't need to worry.

Surprisingly, we did hang out a few times, but they soon drifted away from me.

It was natural, given that I was passive and not particularly interesting, and there was no benefit in being my friend.

At first, the boys who knew about our deep connection would look at me with envy, but after they saw that I was just an ordinary boy, they stopped paying attention to me.

I know. If I continue like this, I'll lose her.

I need to be more proactive, work harder to make up for my shortcomings, and at least have a presence around her, even if I can't be her equal.

But is it that easy?

People don't change easily.

In my case, it was impossible.

So, I confessed before she could be taken away.

At the end of the first semester of my first year in middle school.

After a year of meaningless time, our conversations became less frequent, and unlike in elementary school, we lived in different places, so we had few opportunities to meet.

Our relationship became somewhat ambiguous.

When I unexpectedly called her, she looked surprised and asked what was wrong, but soon she seemed to sense something from my unusual demeanor and remained silent, her hand on her cheek.

The memories of our childhood together never change. The time we spent together can't be erased. I can proudly say it was the happiest time of my life. I believe my childhood friend felt the same way.

It was better to believe that.

She had always shown a steady interest in me. We even made a playful promise to get married when we were young.

Although the timing was sudden, if she accepted my confession, it would mean that she still liked me, and I wouldn't have to worry anymore.

If I could firmly establish our relationship, I was confident that I could work hard to become her equal.

So.

Relying on a faint and vague possibility, I made a hasty decision and a choice I couldn't take back.

But was it too late?

...No.

Even if it had been at any other time, the answer would have been the same.

"...Ahaha. I was completely surprised. ...Yeah, I see... So, Edgio felt that way about me..."

My childhood friend, who seemed slightly shocked, gently combed her hair, which was the color of cherry blossoms, and gave an ambiguous smile.

I was in an unprecedented state of tension.

My hands were sweating, and cold sweat ran down my spine. I fidgeted like someone who couldn't hold their bladder, and I must have looked ridiculous to anyone watching.

Still, my childhood friend looked at me with the same innocent eyes as when we were young and spoke to me in a gentle and soft manner.

"I also... like you, Edgio."

It was a good start.

A much more positive response than I expected.

At the same time.

When I finally lifted my head, which had been lowered, and met her eyes, I realized I had been rejected.

It was...

A kind of instinct.

I didn't want to hear what she would say next.

But I couldn't move.

"Even now, you are my most precious friend. That hasn't changed from when we were young. Today, I was really happy and my heart was pounding when you called me first. Will you talk to me again? Will you not ignore me when I talk to you? ...The friends I have now are great, but I always enjoyed talking to Edgio the most. Yes, it's the truth, without a hint of lies. So, I, even though I still like you so much..."

I couldn't even open my mouth to stop her.

Enough.

Don't say any more.

My childhood friend, who seemed to be in pain from saying these words, placed her hand on her scarf and spoke with a sad, tearful face.

"...Liking and loving are different things. I'm sorry, Edgio."

At that moment.

A sharp pain, as if my heart was being torn raw, struck me.

It was a result I had somewhat expected.

But I didn't expect it to hurt this much.

My head, which had been boiling with excitement, cooled down, and as my rational mind returned, I realized that I had made a choice I would regret for the rest of my life.

Objectively, there was nothing wrong with what she said.

I was indeed her best friend.

But as a romantic interest, as a charming opposite sex, as a man, I was invisible to her.

There was nothing more painful than that.

I couldn't even ask why.

What was lacking in me that I couldn't date her? What are your standards for a man? How can I make you see me as a romantic interest...

Asking such questions would have been foolish.

Even if I got an answer, I knew I didn't have the ability or the possibility to make it happen.

After all, who would see a man shorter than a woman as a romantic interest?

Unless he had some special charm.

From my childhood friend's perspective, a man who was not only short but also unattractive, talentless, and introverted could never evoke romantic feelings.

It was impossible from the start.

Six years of friendship couldn't compensate for all those shortcomings.

"...Yeah, that's possible. I understand."

I clenched my fists so hard they bled, and my childhood friend looked at me with a worried expression.

"Edgio must be hurt, right? I'm really sorry... I... I didn't want to hurt Edgio... I didn't know how to say it, but I couldn't just not answer..."

I couldn't hear anything.

All I could think was that I wanted to die.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Edgio... But I don't want to be distant from Edgio... I want us to continue being close friends... Is that selfish of me? Am I a bad person? ...Hic, sniff... I'm a really bad person... I'm so sorry, so sorry... Hic..."

My childhood friend was almost crying.

Tears like silver beads rolled down her cheeks as she genuinely mourned the wound she had inflicted on her most precious friend.

She was crying because of me.

It made my heart ache even more.

Being rejected in my first confession, seeing my childhood friend cry in front of me, and imagining what kind of relationship we would have in the future...

Among all these, the most painful was the fact that her sadness was entirely because of me.

If I hadn't confessed in the first place.

If I had been content with just being friends with my childhood friend.

If I hadn't harbored one-sided feelings for her.

Why, why did I, the foolish one, think that my childhood friend would distance herself from me and make a hasty decision that hurt us both?

She still considered me her most precious friend. If I hadn't been greedy, we could have continued as before.

In the end, it was all my fault.

So, I couldn't blame my childhood friend.

If I had to atone, there was only one way.

At least, I would fulfill her wishes.

I would correct my misguided feelings and, even if it was difficult, I would try to be friends with her so that she wouldn't be hurt anymore...

"No, I was the bad one. I understand. As you said, we will continue to be close friends."

My voice didn't tremble at all. It was surprisingly clean. It was so clean that it became calm, and a faint smile appeared on my face.

I wiped her tears with the sleeve of my shirt, which I pride myself on keeping clean, and she asked with wide, trembling eyes.

"Really? Really, you'll continue to be friends with me? We can talk like we used to?"

It was hard to maintain the smile.

Hmm, I wonder.

Probably not.

"Of course."

"...Hic, sniff, sniff... Edgio..."

For a while, she repeated "I'm sorry" and "Thank you" and sobbed. When the lunch break ended, she said she would go to the bathroom to wash her puffy eyes and asked me to go back to the classroom first.

"See you later, Edgio!"

"Sure, see you later."

She quickly became cheerful.

She covered her face with her hands, embarrassed, and ran to the bathroom, and I couldn't stop smiling at her cute back.

Even after she left, I kept smiling for a long time.

That day, I left school early.

#2

This was the last moment my childhood friend and I could be friends.

As people who